I

Presented to the
LIBRARY of the

UNIVERSITY OF TORONTO

by

John Mappin

(J-

I O

(\

rn/

THE PRINCESS MUZZI

THE TRIBULATIONS
OF A PRINCESS

With Portraits from Photographs

BY THE AUTHOR OF

"THE MARTYRDOM OF
AN EMPRESS"

HARPER & BROTHERS PUBLISHERS
NEW YORK AND LONDON

Copyright, 1901, by HARPER & BROTHERS.

All rights reserved.
June, 1901.

TO

MY BOY

FROM

HIS FOND MOTHER

' Ce livre est toute ma jeunesse ;

Je 1'ai fait sans presque y songer ;
II y paraft, je le confesse,
Et j'aurais pu le corriger."

Mais

Au passe pourquoi rien changer?
Va-t'en, pauvre oiseau passager;
Que Dieu te mene a ton adresse !"

ILLUSTRATIONS

THE PRINCESS MUZZI Frontispiece

A RECOGNITION OF MY FATHER'S BRAVERY .... Facing p. 44

PETIT PIERROT " 80

NO LONGER PIERROT, BUT MARGUERITE *' 98

MUZZI IN HER FAVORITE GARB " 156

TO MANY A SPHYNX ! ** l62

MY FAVORITE HUNTER "GOLDEN ARROW" " 184

"MILADl!" " 348

I'HE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

CHAPTER I

"A much-discerning public hold,
The singer generally sings
Of personal and private things,
And prints and sells his past for gold.

"Whatever I may here disclaim,
The very clever folk I sing to
Will most indubitably cling to
Their pet delusion, just the same."

"I DON'T say but what you are not a good little gen-
tleman when you've a mind to, but his lordship he is
uncommon particular about this 'ere eagle, and, if you
don't leave it alone, I'll carry you away before you can
so much as say Davy Jones, my little lord."

Thus spoke Mr. Jinks, the English stud-groom and
general factotum of my father, laying a gentle but
firm hand on my velveteen-clad shoulder, and draw-
ing me away from the stout wooden enclosure inside
of which a gigantic male eagle circled round and round
at the end of a long, slender chain of steel that was
securely clasped about its horny left leg.

This eagle, which my father had winged on one of our
frequent expeditions along the rugged, precipitous cliffs
that formed part of the boundary of our old family
estate, was a source of continual delight and admiration

A I

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

to me. I had begged hard for its life when it dropped
at our feet, with one of its enormous pinions broken
by my father's unerring shot, and from that moment
I felt that I had a very positive claim on this magnifi-
cent bird — the emblem to me of power, strength, and
imperial beauty.

" Let me go, Jinks," I cried, excitedly, slipping from
the man's grasp. " That bird is as good as mine. Why
do you meddle ? I only want to give it some raw meat
which I got from the chef on purpose for him/'

"All right; throw it to the brute, then, while I'm
a-watchin' of you ; but you please stay at a respectable
distance, for that 'ere chap is dangerous, and would
peck out your bonny eyes, or tear you to pieces with its
ugly, big claws, as quick as it would look at you ; and,
what's more, my lord he says to me, says he, 'Look
to it, Jinks, that the youngster he don't go too near to
that bird ' ; and I answers, ' You can trust me, sir, he
won't/ So you see, my little lord, I'm bound to obey
borders, and so are you, for the matter of that ! It's not
many noblemen as is to be compared with your daddy ;
never grudgin' a servant his privileges, never wrongly
out of temper, with always a kind word ready, and a
free hand with the tips. Oh, he is a thoro'bred, every
inch of him, he is ! A real gentleman, and no mistake ;
not one of them blessed parvenouse as don't know one
end of a 'orse from t'other, and who gives themselves
hairs just the same; but a true-born haristocrat. And
as for me, I'll be damned if I care what I do for
him/'

With which peroration Jinks took the now empty
meat-basket from my hand and marched me through
the shrubbery into the saddle-room, which was one of
my favorite haunts.

This little incident took place a great many years

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

ago — more, indeed, than I care to count ; and yet it is
still as vivid in my mind as if it had occurred yester-
day, doubtless because it did not end with this admoni-
tion from my father's faithful retainer, but indeed came
pretty near to costing me my life.

Childlike, I took but scanty notice of Jinks's warning,
and morning after morning I stole Indian fashion from
bush to bush to visit my friend the eagle. I invariably
spoke to it as I would have spoken to a human being,
and as if it were thoroughly able to comprehend my
every word. I fed it with choice morsels coaxed from
the chef, who was the arch-enemy of Mr. Jinks, and
who was delighted to aid and abet me in my disregard
of that worthy's injunctions. Indeed, so great was
my affection for the superb bird that I gave him the
grandiloquent name of " Fulvius," probably because
my tutor, an erudite and distinguished priest, told me
that it was a remarkable specimen of the Aquila Fulva.
Bolder and bolder did I become, till at last I decided to
waive all precaution and to climb into the eagle's sand-
ed domain, in order to meet it, as it were, on an equal
footing. Wasted chivalry, indeed!

So eager was I to put this brilliant plan into execu-
tion, and to avoid discovery, that I selected for my es-
capade the moment when I knew that my father was
changing his riding-dress for a shooting-coat, and
Jinks superintending the rubbing-down of the horse
and pony from which we had just dismounted. Care-
fully and secretly I approached my goal, and, after
propitiating " Fulvius " with a bit of raw steak — which,
I am sorry to confess, had been brought thither in the
pocket of my knickerbockers — I vaulted over the rail-
ing and walked fearlessly towards the great bird.

To my amazement the eagle dropped his prize and
hurled himself at me with ruffled plumes, snapping

3

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

beak, and clutching talons, while his yellow eyes turned
a fierce red. An unconscious instinct of self-preserva-
tion made me cover my face with my arms and drop
flat upon the ground; but as I did so it flashed through
my little, active mind that I was done for, and that it
served me jolly well right, too !

The report of a gun, followed by a soft, choking
weight of warm flesh and feathers that covered me from
head to foot, was the last I knew. When I awoke from
what must have been a swoon, I lay trembling on my
father's breast; and looking up into his blanched face
with a sense of confusion that made my head dizzy,
I murmured, feebly:

"What is it?"

There was no reply, except a tightening of the strong
arms that held me. Then the whole scene came back
to me with a shock, and the consequences of my dis-
obedience brought such a feeling of shame that I burst
into tears, and, clinging to my father's neck, sobbed
piteously :

"Oh, pardon me, papa! I did not mean to pain you
so much! Please, please pardon me!"

" Hush ! Don't cry, Pierrot ! You must not be a baby.
It is not like you to give way so. Let us forget all about
it. You are sufficiently punished now, and we can let
the matter drop."

It was just like my father — this little speech — just
like his usual kindness and generosity, for now, as
always, he tried to spare my budding pride, and there-
fore I felt better at once. When he put me on my feet
again, my luckless encounter with " Fulvius" seemed
to drift away like a bad dream, but yet my whole mind
was filled with remorse at the thought that I had caused
the death of my beautiful eagle.

No words can describe my admiration and gratitude

4

I

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

when I learned that my really miraculous rescue was
due to my father. It appeared that from his dressing-
room window he had seen me climb over the forbidden
rails, and, seizing a gun from a table near by, he had
shot the bird in the very nick of time. The range was
so long, the aim so accurate, that this feat of arms be-
came proverbial throughout the country. My young
imagination was ablaze with a sort of adoring respect,
and more than ever now I compared this dear father
of mine to the heroes of chivalry whom I was ever so
eager to read or to hear about.

I do not think that there ever was a closer relation-
ship between a man and a little child than that which
existed between my father and me. Our affection was
an uncommon one, for I became his constant compan-
ion as soon as I could walk. At three years of age
I was put on a pony. At five I thought nothing of fol-
lowing the hounds, or of tramping for hours together
through the salt-marshes which line the Brittany coast,
trying my skill, with a diminutive rifle, on sea-fowls, or
on the rock -rabbits and hare that dwelt in the gorse
and heather.

My little cot nestled close to my father's huge balda-
quined bed, for, though my own room opened into his,
I begged so hard nqt to be forced to sleep there that I
gained my point, and morning after morning my first
glance was for him, my first idea to plan out the day's
excursions and rambles with him.

From where I lay I could look through portieres into
my little sanctum, which had been furnished by his
orders in imitation of a Brittany peasant's room.

The bed, shaped like a cupboard, was of heavy, carved,
pear-tree wood, with the heads of cherubs and of chubby
smiling angels shining forth from the dark, primitive,
sculptured panels. The draw-curtains attached thereto

5

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

were of white serge lined with crimson cloth, and, like
the coverlet, were embroidered in multicolored silks and
golden threads, as the fete- clothes of the paludier—
the workers of our salt-marshes — are to this day. At
the head of this curious couch stood a little, ponderously
carved praying-stool surmounted by a wooden image
of the Blessed Virgin, whose outstretched arms always
seemed to offer comfort to my strange and impulsive
little soul. The walls were wainscoted, and the dra-
peries of the windows and doors were of white em-
broidered serge, while my toys, books, and other most
treasured possessions were enclosed in tall bahuts —
those capacious presses, which are the pride of all Bre-
ton housekeepers.

It was a severe style of decoration for a child's apart-
ment, yet it did not seem so to me, because I was brought
up in a somewhat Spartan way, without any molly-
coddling— to use a familiar expression — and because
the severity of the apartment was relieved by the most
superb view which I have ever seen in my life, framed
by two deeply niched windows. The tossing mass of
great Atlantic rollers, encircled on each side by high
cliffs of bluish granite, against which they broke in
prismatic spray, were a never-ending source of delight
to me.

The dear old ancestral castle, all ivy-grown, with its
turrets and battlements, stands up grimly, like the ever-
vigilant sentinel of these wild regions, for it is wholly
unhurt by six hundred years of storms and tempests,
and is still firm at its post on the very edge of the preci-
pice. Its balconies, sculptured by the hands of dead-and-
gone artists, overhang one hundred and eighty feet of
sheer rock, that form a natural buttress for the waves
and shelter the pebbly beach, where at low tide I de-
lighted to fish for crabs, prawns, and all the other mar-

6

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

vellous beasts and shells left behind by the retreating
water in deep translucent pools.

My only trials in those happy days were my school-
room hours, though they were made as pleasant as
possible by my tutor, who was the kindest and most
saintly of priests. He acted as chaplain, too, and every
morning at six o'clock said mass in the private chapel
of the castle, with that impressive simplicity which
rises from a pure and faithful heart. How often have
I in later life regretted my attempts at shirking his
gentle teachings in those school-hours! But I was
ever a sad truant, and often appealed to my father for
freedom, especially during the hunting season.

" William of the Long Sword could not write or read,
papa, and in those splendid days knights and nobles
never learned anything," I said to him once, wistfully.

"You little scamp/' he replied, laughing, "is this
what you use your so arduously obtained knowledge
for, to quote history with embarrassing Apropos. Now
let me tell you, my boy, that King Ethelstane of Eng-
land, who lived at the same period as did this precious
William of yours, insisted upon all his nobles being
taught to read and write, and Foulques le Bon once
wrote to the then King of France, " Apprenez, Monsei-
gneur, qu'un Roy sans lettres est un Ane couronnel"

With true Breton stubbornness I made up my mind,
nevertheless, not to heed the wise remarks of foulques
le Bon, and I gave no credit to a king who, like Ethel-
stane of England, tortured his, brave nobles with learn-
ing. But to please my father — and for that reason
only — I did try to be more attentive and to behave my-
self in a way befitting a knightly youth, when Monsieur
TAbbS took up his daily duties as my instructor and
mentor.

Jinks thought exactly as I did on the subject of sci-

7

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

ence, and many were the long discussions we had in the
sanctity of the saddle-room concerning this sore trial.

"You're a lad o' wax, my little lord/' the stud-
groom would say. " Strike me a loser if you ain't in the
right to hate these 'ere lessons. Why they should all
be a-tryin' to bother your sleek little 'ead with grammar
and all that sort of stuff, when what you need to know
is only 'ow to sit your 'orse straight and 'andle your
gun proper in the open or under cover is what beats
me. Why, bless you, my lovely, there's no need of
learnin' for the like of you, for there's a deal in blood,
and you've got that, and no mistake. Heducation is
bosh for them as is not school-teachers, and in my mind
is more 'armful than henviable."

Such was Mr. Jinks's philosophy, and I might as well
confess at once that it met with my unalloyed approval.
Jinks was, in my opinion, the very pink of perfection,
for he was a splendid fellow on horseback and a great
four-in-hand whip. And then he was so very amusing
when, as we sat together in the saddle-room, he would
blow the froth off his pewter and tell me long yarns about
the fine times he had when he was a boy and rode race-
horses on the Downs for his master, a celebrated horse-
breeder

I have not as yet spoken of my mother, which may
seem strange, but the fact is that this beautiful woman,
of a graceful, dark, Spanish type of loveliness — although
she is by birth a Russian — was to me throughout my
childhood a remote Deity, unapproachable on the fa-
miliar, tender, and affectionate plane upon which my
father stood. I admired her deeply & distance, and
used to be very proud when I heard complimentary
remarks made about the perfection of her tea-rose skin,
her flashing black eyes, and her long, raven hair, and
I can well remember often amusing myself by lying

8

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

down on the carpet of her dressing-room and watch-
ing her slender curved feet, which, when unshod, I used
to think formed natural arches, like little bridges.

Talented, witty, with that sharp, caustic, merciless
wit which often cuts like the lash of a whip, she was
singularly entertaining and clever, and yet some-
how I never felt easy when I was with her, and I avoid-
ed her as much as possible. She awed me sometimes ;
but, strange to say, she excited me to revolt against
any authority save my father's.

Her Muscovite imperiousness, her slow, mocking
smile, and her extraordinary severity repelled me;
and I would as soon have thought of confiding my
little troubles and joys to a marble statue than to this
elegante, whom I had once overheard saying that I
was a distressingly homely child, and by no means
a credit to two families as famous for their good looks
and splendid figures as her own and my father's are.

I was a mere baby then, barely five years old, I take
it, but her words remained indelibly impressed on my
brain, and I felt humiliated and terribly hurt. Was I
a monster? Perhaps I was. I knew that I was very
small for my age, very pale, and with big, changeful,
gray eyes that seemed to eat up half of my tiny face.

When I heard this unfortunate sentence I was crouch-
ing behind a curtain in the central hall, playing with
a bull-pup, one of my dearest possessions, and with a
child's innate tact I kept perfectly quiet until my mother
had drawn her trailing silks and laces up the staircase
on her way to dress for dinner. Then, with a beating
heart, I bounded across the floor and planted myseli
in front of a huge mirror that filled in an entire panel
of the otherwise tapestried walls. Ruthlessly pushing
aside the fronds of some tall ferns and palms which
decorated the base of the mirror, I stood on tiptoe and

9

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

surveyed my reflection with the curiosity one feels when
meeting an absolute stranger.

The fires of the great twin hearths at either end of the
large apartment were leaping into bright rosy flames,
and created a dancing, fitful but vivid glow that showed
me my small self plainer than daylight could have done.

It chanced so that on that particular occasion I wore
a white serge sailor suit, the wide, drooping collar of
which was relieved by a deep band of sky-blue silk
with little silver anchors. I could not, for the life of
me, discover the motive or the reason that had caused
my mother to speak so, for in my own humble inner
consciousness I thought that I looked every inch a
bright and active little sailor-boy, and a very well-
dressed one at that.

What thoughts may have raced through my un-
formed brain I do not remember. Probably resent-
ment against my mother had the upper hand, but soon
my natural insouciance regained the mastery, and,
shrugging my shoulders — a detestable habit, which
drove my decorous maternal relative to desperation —
I ran headlong up-stairs to my own room, whistling
loudly as I went. There I consoled myself by think-
ing that a man, when all is told, is in no real need of
physical beauty, and that by-and-by I would grow up
to be as tall as my father, who was a regular giant, even
if I could not hope to be as handsome as he, and then
also, to tell the plain and unvarnished truth, I knew that
he loved me just as I was, which was quite sufficient a
reason to make me scorn anybody else's prejudices.

I was very strong, in spite of my delicate slenderness
— "just as strong as a box-plant," papa would say; and
then he would add : " You weary your mother with your
restlessness. Come out on the moor with me, where ex-
ercise will quiet you down, if such a thing be possible!"

10

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

During the shooting season my indefatigable little
legs would plough through the furze and broom and
heather of the landes in a continuous effort to keep up
with my father's big strides, and all the year round
I was out-of-doors, wandering on the pebbly beach, on
the heath, or about the gardens, shouting with glee
when a plover or a gull rose screeching above the
salt-marshes, yelling myself hoarse with delight when
the tumultuous waves came thundering upon that por-
tion of the shore which is honeycombed with deep,
sonorous, mysterious caves ceaselessly echoing the
voice of the ocean.

At other times I was content to lie on the top of the
cliffs, looking down upon the salt-marshes stretched out
in the sunlight below me, like great square panes of
glass that reflected the dark or rose-hued clouds above.
The conical heaps of salt, ready to be carted away,
looked to my vivid imagination like the tents of a
cavalry camp. And again and again I inhaled rapt-
urously the breezes that having brushed over all that
brine smelled of crushed violets and filled my lungs
with health and vigor.

This happy existence lasted until I was eight years
old, varied only by autumnal house -parties, which
were limited usually to three series of guests. I de-
tested these times, simply because my father would be
with me less then. The state apartments were opened ;
the great dining-hall was used in preference to the
octagonal room that overlooked the bay. My father
and mother usually dined together in this cosey room,
when we were alone. When the above-mentioned
guests were present, I was brought in every evening
at dessert, clad in a white velvet suit, with broad lace
collar and cuffs, silk socks, and little white patent-
leather court-pumps. I felt intensely savage on such

ii

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

occasions, and could not help disliking all these people,
who disturbed, no doubt unconsciously, the even tenor
of my life for the time being.

"An ungainly and ungracious child," my mother
frequently declared, with one of her chilling little smiles ;
and, truly, looking back upon those far-off times, I can
easily realize how galling it must have been to her,
sitting at the head of her superbly appointed table —
the embodiment of feminine elegance, chic, and beauty
— to watch my quaint, silent ways, the contempt with
which I repulsed all blandishments. Eh! even my in-
difference to bonbons and sweets — coldly, not to say
disdainfully, refused when her fair lady friends tried
to coax me to accept that dainty bait.

All I wanted to do, and all I enjoyed doing, was to
climb upon my father's knee and there sit within the
curve of his encircling arm, absolutely passing judg-
ment upon those exquisitely dressed, idle women, whom
I could not bring myself to admire. Often when he
carried me up to bed I would burst into a flood of pas-
sionate tears, cling desperately to him, and beg him
to send away all those bad, cruel people, who kept him
from me. It seems to me as if I could still hear him
saying, soothingly:

"But, my little one, what makes you feel so unhap-
py? Surely you know that I love you better than all
the world put together, you foolish little kitten!"

" Then send them away, dear, dear papa. I want you
all alone to myself, and I hate, hate, hate them!"

Sometimes he tried severity. At least, I presume he
fancied that I would mistake for serious displeasure
his assumed frown and his terrible threat of "going
down-stairs " and leaving me all alone if I did not in-
stantly stop so disgraceful and unseemly an outburst.
But I was at no pains to see through all that; and it was

12

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

only when he, as a last resort, ended by saying : " Vous
me faites de la peine, mon petit enfant/' that the hard-
ness at my heart would melt like snow and that I would
humbly beg him to pardon me, promising to behave
better on the morrow. Unfortunately my love for him
was so strong that, like all other intense loves, it bred
bitter jealousy, and my promises were only kept as
long as his hand held mine, and I was in his imme-
diate presence.

A little before my eighth birthday I noticed that my
mother, who was usually as strong as a steel blade in a
velvet scabbard, began to grow singularly delicate in
health. Her beautiful Irish mare, "Lady Jane/' was
no longer saddled for her use, but had to be exercised
by the grooms. Instead of taking part in the numer-
ous dinners and fetes given that spring in the neigh-
boring chateaux — neighborhood is an elastic word in
Brittany, where the distances are abnormally long —
this beautiful mother of mine lay frequently on the
lounge in her boudoir. Often she failed to join us in
the castle chapel at early mass, and I noticed also
that my father devoted much more of his time to her,
redoubling his ever-chivalrous care, attending to her
slightest comforts and loading her with costly gifts.

This seemed very unreasonable to me, for she had
never been so fretful or so difficult to please, and I
speechlessly wondered at his long-suffering patience,
for I knew how quick-tempered he was and how intoler-
ant of languor and peevishness. Nevertheless, this
was perhaps the happiest period of my life, for I was
more than ever before his companion. Moreover, it
was at that time that he presented me with a larger
pony than my old pet — almost a cob, indeed — who re-
joiced in the high-sounding name of " Rob Roy/'

How I did enjoy the swift gallops over hill and dale,

13

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

across grass and forest-land and the jumping of ditches
and hedges in the teeth of the cold wintry wind that
tossed my cap over my nose! At such moments I
laughed heartily, for my father said that I looked like
a little blind beggar. Delightful, too, were the long
rides home, when, tired out but thoroughly happy, I
gazed up at the handsome face that looked down upon
me so merrily from the dizzy heights of the big bay
horse "Moonshine" or the glorious English mare
"Ninette." Alas! the remembrance of those glorious
days has been pregnant with bitter regrets through
the long years that followed.

Far be it, however, from me to imitate Stendhal, and
to make these reminiscences of my life a continuous
and wearying anthem glorifying my own personality,
as it were, like that eminently introspective man who
thought his to be the central pivot of the universe.
Alas, my personality is — now especially — too slender
a one to be of general interest. But I cannot go on
with my present task without, so to speak, making my
unworthy self a little too prominent. And so, kind
reader, have patience with me, and do not accuse me
of egotism or vanity if I dwell at some length upon the
days of my childhood; for they are the pedestal of the
strange existence which has fallen to my lot, an exist-
ence wherein I have many times had reason to be thank-
ful that I came from a race of reckless, merry soldiers
and of high-handed seigneurs. For it is some heri-
tancy of their courage and their energy which has
helped me to carry life's heavier burdens at the sword's
point, I might say. Inherited qualities are the only
ones which one may be proud of. Like most sporting
people, I am an implicit believer in hereditary influ-
ences, and I am glad to be able to bless mine instead
of having to blush for them.

14

CHAPTER H

"Und es wallet und siedet, und brauset, und zischt

Wie wenn Wasser mit Feuer sich mengt!
Bis zum Himmel spritzet der dampfende Gischt,

Und Flut an Flut sich ohn' Ende drangt;
Und will sich nimmer erschopfen und leeren
Als wollte das Meer noch ein Meer gebaren."

NEW YEAR— or, as we call it, " Le Premier de T An "
-was always solemnized with much pomp at home.
Such was my eagerness to reach this blissful day that,
with childlike inconsequence, I slept uneasily for many
nights before it dawned. I would lie for hours together,
wide-eyed and restless, thinking of the great illuminated
fir-tree which was always prepared for me on St. Sylves-
ter's Eve, instead of at Christmas, as is done in Eng-
land, Germany, Austria, and Russia, and would plot
and plan about the gifts which it was my especial joy
to shower upon all those about me.

I was always allowed to select these gifts myself,
according to my own taste, and this was a pleasure to
look forward to indeed. My dear old tutor, Monsieur
I'Abbe", was my only companion on these shopping
expeditions, and he frequently had cause to raise his
eyebrows to the roots of his silvered hair, and to lift his
dimpled, admirably kept hands in dismay towards
an unkind Heaven, when my choice fell upon a more
than ordinarily incongruous object.

The unfortunate Abbess position as my sage Mentor,
was no sinecure, for I was what is commonly called
" a handful/' and his ideas of the dignity with which

15

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

a young personage of my rank and race should com-
port himself were continually upset by my erratic be-
havior.

How clearly I remember that last happy New Year's
Eve and the day preceding it ! Clad in a costume of
dark-green velvet and furs, copied with much freedom
of invention from Cossack uniforms, I entered the brough-
am, where the delightful old Priest awaited me, in
order to drive to the nearest town. It was twelve miles
over a road that ran along the picturesque and capri-
cious shores of the bay and then turned into a great wood
of pines and cork-oaks — a lonely spot, where I looked
about with delicious shivers of anticipation for a glimpse
of some straying Kourrigan or Farfadet. Perhaps I
half hoped to see the Fay Melusina herself, flitting
about under the dense shadows cast by those evergreen
trees. On that memorable day I remember that, in
spite of my extremely poetical and romantic inclinations
with regard to fairies and hobgoblins, I was holding
my foot in my hand and singing, mezzo voce, a few
choice bars of a song the sailors on my father's yacht
Ichtis were wont to shout at the top of their leathern
lungs :

" C'est les trois Cancrelats
Qu'on mis la patte au plat —
Au plat du Capitaine —

Dondaine —
Au plat du Capitaine!"

"What on earth are you singing, Pierrot?" exclaimed
Monsieur 1'Abbe", in amazement. "That is hardly
proper French for you, nor yet a proper sort of song,
is it?"

Quite unabashed, I stopped singing, and, looking up
into the kind blue eyes where I caught the suspicion of

a smile, I said, quietly :

16

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

"Oh, that's a chanson de Mathurin (a fo'c's'le song),
which sailors sing when they are very drunk."

" And may I inquire where you heard sailors singing
when in that shocking condition?"

"Ah, well, sailors are always drunk when they are
at sea/' I replied, simply ; and with renewed jubilation
I intoned another song from my repertoire, which be-
gan:

"U'n brise a faire plier 1'pouce—
Rigi, rigo, riguingo I

Avec le cceur en gargousse— •
Rigi, rigo, riguingo {
Oh, riguinguette 1"

" That's very pretty indeed, and I am pleased to hear
what exquisite melodies you learn. You apparently
have more aptitude for them than you do for your les-
sons, and I will take care to mention this to your
attendants and to prevent you from roaming about on
the yacht."

"Oh, Monsieur 1'Abbe", you wouldn't deprive me
of my little amusements, would you?" I pleaded,
with so much earnestness that the dear old man could
not help laughing. "Why don't you show more
clemency to me, like the chap in Horace which you
make me study about. You know he says :

"' . . . Je ferai justice;
J'aime a la rendre a tous, a toute heure, en tout lieu!'"

"Why, Pierrot, you are becoming too pert, my child 1
It is not seemly that you — " But all further remon-
strance was cut short by our entry into that quaint old
Breton town which I have described elsewhere, and
which is the most perfect little mediaeval jewel of a
city that one can imagine.

We soon reached the Place du Parvis, where the
B 17

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

ancient cathedral casts the checkered shade of its
stone lace-work, blackened by season after season of
exposure to wind and weather. All around the square
the houses are turreted and gabled, and their high-
pointed roofs of dark-blue slate, stained here and there
with pale golden patches of lichen, are marvellously
preserved. The dusky little shops on the ground-floor
display in faded lettering over their narrow show-win-
dows the names of the present owners, which for the
matter of that are the same as those that stood there
hundreds of years ago. One is conservative in Basse-
Bretagne, and a son takes up his father's trade from
generation to generation.

I pranced into the largest of these enticing empo-
riums followed by the Abbe", and lost no time in doing
my best to drive the unfortunate shop-keepers half
crazy with my boundless demands upon their patience.
Long I remained undecided, hesitating between antique
Armorican jewels, relics, objects of piety, and more
modern but less artistic tokens of nineteenth-century
industry. Finally, I pounced upon a very gorgeous
blue velvet pin-cushion adorned with sea-shells and
provided with a mirror which had, alas, the curious
propensity of distorting everything that it reflected,
and in loud tones I declared that I would give it to my
mother.

"But, Pierrot," whispered the Abbe, "please don't
scream so, moreover, your lady mother would not for
a moment dream of placing this extraordinary object
upon any of her beautiful dressing-tables/'

"Oh yes, she would; there's a mirror, you know —
she does so like mirrors. And then, Monsieur 1'Abbe",
please remember that you are to let me buy just what I
like. That's the bargain. I'm to be good, and so are
you."

.is

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Against such rhetoric there was naturally no ap-
peal, and Monsieur 1'Abbe" merely gave me a look which
afforded me some food for reflection and bade the highly-
a m used clerk wrap up the ungainly pin-cushion and
send it to the carriage.

" Have you chosen nothing for your father?" added
Monsieur l'Abb6, considerately.

"Is it likely that I should ever forget papa?" I re-
sponded, hotly; and then, turning to the glass case
where the antique jewels sparkled on a bed of faded
white satin, I pointed to a delicately wrought Breton
heart and crown of burnished gold, whereon the fol-
lowing sentence in Gaelic, "Our hearts are one," was
incrusted in small rubies.

This time Monsieur 1'Abbe" made no observation or
comment, even when the very lofty price of the little
jewel was mentioned, and I even fancied that his feat-
ures perceptibly softened, and he certainly was exem-
plarily patient in listening during the long drive home
to the " Rigi, rigo, riguingo" of my beloved sailor
songs.

The New Year ceremonies in Brittany are very quaint
and original. On St. Sylvester's Eve I went into ec-
stasies at the sight of my fir-tree, which was fifteen feet
high. It glittered like some heavenly toy decorated
by the angels with bits of sunlit clouds and streams
of silver moon-rays, stars, planets, and constellations
of all descriptions. It was hung also with Paradisaical
fruits and flowers, and with presents which were really
far too valuable to be placed in the hands of so young
a child. The village lads stood outside in the Cour
d'Honneur singing the habitual carol, which I give
here just as it amused me to jot it down from memory
on my blotting-pad a while ago!

19

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

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To my huge delight I was permitted to stay up
for the reveillon, a gorgeous supper of a very indi-
gestible kind, which begins at eleven o'clock and lasts
till one or two in the morning, with a view of start-

20

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

ing the New Year on its way right merrily, glass in
hand.

The Christmas re'veillon and midnight mass were also
occasions of the purest enjoyment to me, in spite of the
fact that I felt very sleepy. For these nights were the
only ones out of the three hundred and sixty-five when
I was allowed to remain out of bed after eight o'clock.

I still always love to dwell in thought upon the cus-
toms which prevail along the shores of dear old Brittany !
not so much where railroads have invaded the country
and cast hosts of tourists upon the beaches, but in my
own dear Basse -Bretagne, where the usages of by-
gone days have been preserved in all their purity and
charming quaintness. Visitors are a rarity in the lit-
tle villages, hamlets, and tiny fortified towns that sur-
round my old home. Now and then an artist or so,
perchance, happens upon the place during the heat
of the summer months, but that is a very exceptional
occasion, and even to them does the true life of the peo-
ple remain absolutely unbeknown. This is rather a
pity, for the ways of the Bas- Bretons are far from
commonplace, tant s'en faut ; and no doubt they would
prove of considerable interest to those who like the
piquancy of what diverges from the beaten track.

I, for instance, never can forget the queer, nay, the
touching ceremonies, both religious and otherwise,
which I witnessed so many a time on the stormy coast
of the Mer Sauvage, that dusky, romantic promon-
tory where my childhood was passed, and I often com-
pare them very disfavorably with the senseless, fussy,
expensive, and downright vulgar ways of celebrating
popular fetes in other parts of the world which I have
since visited. When once one has crossed the bound-
ary-line separating the last branch of the railroad from
our true Bretagne au coeur dore, one must needs say

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

good-bye to all modernism and finicky civilization, and
one feels one's self suddenly transported into the far
dimness of the Middle Ages.

Reading and writing are considered by our peasants
as quite extraordinary accomplishments, enviable and
awful in their mysterious grandeur, and almost unat-
tainable for any save the Cure, Monsieur le Maire,
and the Seigneur — an appellation still in use where
the Lord of the Manor is concerned. The thatched-
roofed houses of these strange peasantry are, as a rule,
windowless, the door alone serving to admit light,
through its upper pane of greenish thick glass. Their
food is of the roughest, consisting of soupe aux choux,
black bread, salt-pork, salt-fish, and sour milk. Yet
these good people are happy, and they enjoy their rude,
wholesome life far more than does many a Croesus,
gorged with millions and luxuries galore! The Bret-
on's honesty of purpose, simplicity of mind, quiet cour-
age, sturdy loyalty, and deep, unquestioning faith are
to be met nowhere else in the world, and if they be some-
times a little superstitious, they should be forgiven, for
their whole conduct indicates that they truly believe in
the reward of their virtues and the punishment of their
faults after death, which belief is in itself, one is bound
to state, a grand and beautiful source of comfort and of
consolation while here below.

Christmas in Brittany is a strictly religious feast. It
includes the midnight mass, and after this even the
humblest families enjoy a hearty supper, wonderfully
cooked before the monumental hearth of granite, inside
which are fastened benches reserved for les vieux
(the old ones). But New Year is the time for pleasure
— as I have already said — for dancing, for rejoicing,
and also the occasion of rather weird doings. The Bret-
ons are a rather mournful race. They have something

22

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

of the sadness of the ocean mixed with their nature. So,
when I speak of their pleasures and rejoicings, I do not
mean what most other nations would understand by
these words. For even their dances in no way resem-
ble the airy motions of the waltz, the polka, or the min-
uet. They are heavy and ponderous, and are carried
out to the strains of a semi-barbaric music, consisting
chiefly of the sounds made by bignious (bagpipes). The
costumes of the peasants lend weight to the extraordi-
nary deliberation of their motions. For the tracht has
been preserved for hundreds of years in all its integrity ;
and what with the heavy woollen stuffs, thick bullion
embroidery, and silk kerchiefs of the women, and the
numerous vests and coats surmounting the wide, many-
folded breeches of the men, the dancers have but little
chance to disport themselves airily.

St. Sylvester's Eve! What an event these words
bring back to mind!

On the night of this, the last of the three hundred and
sixty-five days of weary travail and privation, many
superstitions hold sway. Those I allude to are prob-
ably known only to such people as have been born
and bred in the most secluded and untravelled portions
of Brittany.

The old legends, which are still looked upon almost
as actes de foi, are strangely pathetic and interesting.
One in particular haunted my childhood with its glitter
of gems and its possibilities of unlimited wealth. So
dearly do I love a good yarn that I cannot resist the
temptation of setting this one down here, as a sample
of the pretty, mystical tales which rocked my early
dreams.

My father's old nurse, who was then nearly seventy,
and who looked, with her snowy coiffe and her dear
wrinkled face, like the incarnate spirit of mediaeval Ar-

23

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

morica, used to tell it to me again and again at dusk, in
a thrilling voice, pregnant with faith. She — poor old
soul — believed it to be true in every detail, and so did I
in those days.

"Ever so many years ago, when the angels had not
as yet turned their faces quite away from the wicked-
ness of the world, and when the land was not infested
with as many devils as it is now, there lived in Finisterre
a stalwart lad, handsome as daylight, who loved a lass,
beautiful and true. But, alas! the girl's father was
rich; for he owned four fields, an acre of salt-marshes,
and a clump of cork-oaks, and of course he would not
hear of giving his little daughter to a sailor-boy who
earned but a mere pittance by risking his life day and
night on the cruel sea in a cockle-shell of a fishing-boat.
And so the lad and the maid were very unhappy and
mourned their wretched lot when they met by stealth
on the edge of the landes.

" It was Christmas Eve, and on his return from the mid-
night mass the lad, whose name was Marie-Pierre,went
to the stable and threw himself wearily down on a bundle
of straw in an empty stall. He found here a warm and
comfortable spot where he could be alone with his sor-
row, undisturbed by the noisy rejoicings of the reveillon.

"Fatigue, however, soon overpowered him, and he
fell into a deep sleep.

"When he had slept a little while he was suddenly
aroused by the sound of voices close beside him. The
tones were strange, muffled, and unnatural, and filled
him with a nameless terror, which he had never felt be-
fore, for he was no coward. For a few minutes he lay
with closed eyes listening intently, and trying to find
out who had spoken. Meanwhile he trembled sorely
and searched mechanically for the rosary in his pocket,
to preserve himself from malefices.

24

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

"An uncontrollable curiosity at last compelled him
to raise his head cautiously and to look up. The barn
was dimly lighted by a great horn lantern, but his
sight was rendered so acute by fear that he could see
almost as well as in broad daylight. Again and again
he glanced into every nook and corner, but could dis-
cover no one in the stable. Only the cattle stood near
by, knee-deep in thick litter, yet a voice came from a
stall near by. The occupant of this stall was a very
aged ox, kept on the place more in gratitude for his past
services at the plough than with any idea of possible
further use. Marie-Pierre peeped through a chink in
the wooden partition separating him from the decrepit
animal, and to his horror discovered that it was the old
ox that was talking.

" For a few seconds he was paralyzed with amazement.
Then like a flash the memory of an old legend, accord-
ing to which animals are endowed with the power of
speech on Christmas Eve, between midnight and day-
break, rushed through his mind, and, though a cold
shudder shook him, he resolved to keep absolutely quiet,
so as not to lose a particle of what was going on.

" When the ox had completed the sentence which had
awakened Marie-Pierre, the thread of discourse was
taken up by an equally antiquated donkey at the farther
end of the stable.

"'Ah!' exclaimed the latter, 'how blind men are not
to understand the true ways of nature! If they were,
for instance, told that we are able, on Christmas Eve,
to speak as well as they do themselves, they would only
shrug their shoulders and laugh in scorn at so prepos-
terous an idea.'

"Men only care for us/ retorted the ox, sententious-
ly, 'because we help them to earn money. Money
is all they care for! Yes, yes! money alone, and —

25

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

aha ! if they only knew it — I, old and feeble and despised
as I am now, could tell the wisest of them where un-
dreamed gold and riches are to be found in such
abundance that — '

"'What on earth are you talking about, old friend?'
interrupted the donkey. ' You must of a truth be get-
ting on towards your dotage to tell such extravagant
tales, or else the clover and Christmas oats have gone
to your head/

" ' Laugh away/ exclaimed the ox, extremely nettled
by the donkey's remarks. ' But, for all that, I can as-
sure you that during the Vigil of St. Sylvester, once in
every hundred years, at the stroke of midnight, the old
Druidical stones of Plouhinec, a mile from here, leave
the spot where they have stood during so many long
and weary centuries and go down to the sea to drink
their fill. Beneath the place which they leave vacant
while thus doing are great pits filled to the brim with
treasure, and I have been told long ago by my sire that
the glitter of the stones which men call diamonds, the
soft gleam of pearls, the fiery light of rubies, heaped
up therein, make a halo around the spot equal to the
brightest moonshine/

' Whew ! ' brayed the donkey, excitedly, ' that must
forsooth be a grand sight! But how is this treasure
to be reached?'

"'The treasure is unknown to humanity, for this
secret has never been betrayed, and even if men knew
about it they could not touch it, for the stones would
rush back and crush the thieves like insects under their
awful weight, unless the blood of a Christian be sacri-
ficed to the spirits which animate these monuments of
past and pagan ages/

"As the ox pronounced these last words, a distant
bell boomed forth the hour of daybreak. This was the

26

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

end of the time allotted to the animals for speech, and
with a deep-drawn sigh they relapsed into silence.

" More dead than alive, Marie-Pierre lay in a sort of
trance, stunned by what he had heard. Could all this
be true? Could it be within his reach to become one of
the wealthiest men on earth, and thus to win the hand
of his own true love ? A cold, clammy perspiration gath-
ered on his brow, and he shook in every limb at the mere
thought of the great fortune which seemed almost within
his grasp. Gradually, however, he grew more accus-
tomed to the idea, and a firm resolve filled his heart,
to make the attempt and to enrich himself by robbing the
stones of some of their treasure, if human strength and
courage were of any avail to accomplish so terrifying
a deed.

" The light of dawn was stealing into the stable when
he at last got up from the straw which had served him
as a bed. All was still as he made his way to the door,
but when he was about to open it he stopped transfixed
with astonishment ; for there, stretched before him, lay
a human form. It was that of an old man, miser-
ably clothed in rags, with long, unkempt locks of griz-
zly hair, falling in disorder about his emaciated face.
Marie-Pierre drew nearer, and recognized him as an
old beggar of evil repute, who was wont to wander
about the country craving his daily bread from the
peasants and fishermen. On the impulse of the mo-
ment he bent over him, caught him rudely by the
shoulder, and called out:

"'What are you doing here, Kerrick, and who al-
lowed you to enter a decent Christian barn?'

r'The old man opened his glittering eyes, which
shone strangely from his parchment-like countenance,
like jewels in a charnel-house, and shaking the young
man off, said, with an ugly grin :

27

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

'"Keep quiet, my lad. You and I had better be
friends. There is much at stake if we can agree 1
Moreover, your master allowed me to take shelter in
his stable last night, and I thank the spirits that he
did so I1

"Marie-Pierre saw at once from these words that the
aged wizard — for so he was generally held to be — had,
like himself, heard the conversation of the animals,
and he realized that he must submit to all that might
be asked of him, even if it were necessary to share with
Kerrick the treasures of Plouhinec. In this he was
right. The old beggar proposed that they unite in the
attempt, and after a heated discussion they finally de-
cided to go together on the Vigil of St. Sylvester to
the Bay of Plouhinec, and, if they really found the
words of the ox to be true, to unite their efforts in tak-
ing away all the gold and precious stones they could
carry.

" During the week which followed this eventful night,
poor Marie-Pierre lived as one in a dream, and by the
3 1st of December he was almost sick with anxiety
and feverish expectation. To while away the time —
the weather being too stormy for him to go to sea —
Marie-Pierre often visited the wild portion of the landes
where stood the enormous granite memorials of pagan-
ism, from which he sanguinely hoped to gain limitless
wealth. During this period of enforced idleness it came
to pass that a sweet and pious thought entered his
heart, so that he set to work with chisel and ham-
mer, and carved a cross upon the gaunt side of the tallest
stone, taking much trouble and great pains to perfect
this symbol of Christianity, which his simple, faithful
soul worshipped.

"At last the long and weary days came to an end,
and by eleven o'clock on the Vigil of St. Sylvester he

28

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

and old Kerrick started for the treasure Bay of Plou-
hinec. The weather was very cold for Brittany, and
the waves were rolling heavily with a deep roar upon
the beach, eighty feet below them, as they walked along
the edge of the cliffs. All about them rose huge piles
of menhirs, dolmens, and cromlechs — the sacred Dru-
idical stones of the time of the Gauls — looking ghostly
and weird and terrifying in the fitful rays of the moon,
that now and again glided behind banks of tempest-
laden, angry clouds. It was almost midnight when
the two trembling fortune-hunters reached the spot
where the gigantic bowlders known as the stones of
Plouhinec raise their rugged and hoary summits tow-
ards the blackness of the sky. Silently they crouched
behind a rock near a steep incline that led down to the
beach, and there they waited, gazing eagerly at the
apparently immovable masses of gray, storm-beaten
granite before them.

" The minutes seemed to drag like hours, but at last
the dim sound of a far-away church bell was wafted
towards the uneasy pair as it began to strike the mid-
night hour.

" One, two, three — a smothered cry escaped the parch-
ed lips of Marie-Pierre, for he could no longer doubt!
The stones were slowly oscillating on their bases.
They swayed to and fro, faster and faster, with a heavy,
sickening, swinging motion, till at the last stroke of
twelve they tore themselves from their heather-grown
sockets and rolled pell-mell down the incline on their
way to drink at the sea.

"For several minutes the old man and the lad re-
mained spellbound, then they rushed towards the
places left vacant by the erratic stones of Plouhinec.

"Oh! what a sight met their eyes! In the cold
light of the moon shining brightly now, diamonds

29

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

sparkled amid heaps of gold bars and nuggets. Rubies,
emeralds, and sapphires glittered and scintillated and
twinkled like so many wicked eyes tempting them to
enter the open flank of the earth.

"'Fill your pockets! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!'
roared Kerrick, scrambling into one of the yawning
pits and filling with handful after handful of gems a
capacious canvas bag which he had had the forethought
to bring with him. Almost blindly Marie-Pierre obeyed
these directions, groping for the precious stones and
thrusting them into his pockets and the bosom of his
shirt as quickly as his trembling hands would permit.

"Suddenly a fearful rumbling noise reached their
ears.

"'The stones are coming back!' shrieked Kerrick,
and as he spoke the great blocks hove in sight, rolling
back towards them, up the steep incline, knocking
against each other in their terrific haste to reach the
post which they were to occupy for a century to come.

"'We are lost!' cried poor Marie-Pierre, despairingly,
struggling to his feet.

"'You are — not I/ yelled the old beggar, throwing
himself on him.

"At this frightful moment the wretched lad remem-
bered the last words of the ox's revelation — namely, that
the blood of a Christian could alone pacify the spirits
which animated the stones. Kerrick, to save himself,
was going to kill him, for there was the flash of a keen
knife in his upraised hand.

" But Kerrick had reckoned without his host. He did
not know that by Marie-Pierre's pious deed one of the
stones had become a Christian monument, and just
as the murderer was about to accomplish his foul pur-
pose the foremost block of granite, on the gaunt side of
which the Holy Cross had been carved, knocked the

30

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

beggar into eternity and placed itself like a sheltering
guardian before Marie-Pierre, defending him from the
onslaughts of its grim companions which tipsily took
possession of their reconquered coign of vantage.

" A long and terrible shriek of agony rent the air, and
then there reigned a silence profound like that of death.

" On the cliff near Plouhinec there stands a rugged
line of gray and lichen-grown stones, which date as far
back as the days of the Druidical cult — eh! and long
before that time even, before the days when 0ny6c was
reverenced and when the Celtic people turned to their
high -priests as if they were divine beings. On the
largest and haughtiest of them all one may see to-day
a rudely carved cross. The good people of that region
call it la croix miraculeuse de Marie-Pierre, and the
richest mattre-paludier for many miles around, who
owns great tracts of salt-marshes, fields, woods, and
pastures, claims to be a lineal descendant of the young
fisherman whose sudden and marvellous access to fort-
une brought him the desire of his heart — namely, the
hand of the prettiest girl in Plouhinec. "

Old Gaud — which is the Breton for Marguerite —
always concluded her story by telling me: "Little do
we know, little can we guess, all the strange things
that once used to be."

And then, in her high, quavering voice, she would
sing, to a dirge-like air:

" Wisdom is wanted
By him who travels widely;
He who nothing knows
And sits among the wise,
Becomes a gazing-stock."

For she used to be full of old proverbs and ancient
lays, and she considered that it was one of her most

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

clearly defined duties to teach me the legends and lore
of my country.

I owe it to her that, from earliest childhood, I have
looked forward with a species of awed delight to the
countless little practices which make up the bulk of a
true Breton New Year — and for the celebration of which
the four-leaved clover, the mistletoe, "the four herbs
of St. John/' and those transparent sea-shells called
"angels' wings," are indispensable.

Many years later, not so very long ago, in fact, I
risked life and limb to bow to one of these particular
little superstitions which appealed especially to me,
for it deals with flowers, which I have always loved
dearly.

I was then spending a few weeks of the winter in
Brittany, at an old castle belonging to friends of mine.
And having been reminded by a casual mention of the
fleurs de la Sainte Vierge that such a thing existed, I
made up my mind to go in quest of the legendary blos-
som in the most orthodox and approved fashion — that
is to say, on the first night of the full moon in the last
month of the year. Telling no one of my project, ex-
cepting the men on my yacht, I started, after a late din-
ner, on my long sail towards the precipitous shores of
the island of Houat, which faces the wild bay of
Quiberon.

The moon was shedding its brilliant light upon the
waves, and the capes of Quiberon and Thuys showed
on either side of us almost as plainly as had rt been
broad daylight. Directly ahead of us Houat formed a
dark bank of filmy smoke-hued buttresses on the hori-
zon. As the wind was in our favor, it took us a com-
paratively short time to reach the base of the cliffs,
and then, accompanied by two of my sailors, I went
ashore with less difficulty than I had expected. When

32

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

we reached the summit of the island, it seemed to me
as if I were standing at the masthead of a ship, for the
place is curiously small and the sea looks boundless
indeed from so great and narrow an elevation. I did
not stop to admire the fantastically shaped, silvered
rocks that stretched at my feet, nor the waters swaying
all around me, however, but began my search immedi-
ately. I had but scant success at first. Vexed and
discouraged, I turned to the older of my two companions
and asked whether he knew where the flower which
I desired so greatly could possibly be found. Respect-
fully pulling his forelock, he replied, grimly :

"I know the haunts of the plant, but much has to
be risked in order to get it." Then, bending down,
he lay flat upon his stomach on the very edge of the
cliff, I imitating his example with as good a grace as
I could. I must confess that a slight shiver of some-
thing very much like awe, if not downright fear, ran
through me as I looked down sixty yards beneath me
into the funnel-shaped end of the cup-like crevice dent-
ing the island from top to bottom. The sea rushed into
this with every coming wave, so violently that we could
actually feel the rocky walls trembling. Now and then
a column of seething, ferocious-looking green water
rose into the air, and the freshness and bitterness of
the spray beat upon our faces. The noise was deafen-
ing, and the spectacle under such circumstances was
one that might well inspire terror even in the breast of
one born in Brittany.

The rocky sides of this peculiar kind of souffleur
were worn by the storms of centuries into a series of
irregular and jagged steps. On one of these, some fifty
feet beneath us, I saw, by the now wellnigh perpen-
dicular rays shed by Dame Luna, a patch of what looked
like flakes of carded wool. But the old sailor, tugging
C 33

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

at my sleeve, shrieked into my ear that this patch was
composed of plant after plant of the famous and luck-
bringing blossoms I had come so far to fetch.

"Will you come down with me, Yann?" I cried, in
almost a*s loud a voice as his own, in order to make my-
self heard above all that raging turmoil. He nodded
his assent, though the proposition did not seem to en-
chant him. As soon as we rose to our feet the wind
pushed and worried us so that, had I not been brought
up amid the dangerous cliffs of Brittany, and besides
by that time a pretty fair all-round mountaineer, I
would have given up any idea of attempting to follow
Yann along such a perilous path. Even then it was
only with the utmost difficulty that I managed to crawl
down at a snail's pace, realizing the continual and
imminent risk that at any moment I might be precipi-
tated headlong into the frothing water below.

Upon arriving at last on the ledge where the flowerets
grew, we were both more dead than alive. I snatched
a handful of the peculiar growth — leaves, buds, flowers,
and all — and then turned to reascend the precipitous
cliff. How we ever succeeded in reaching the top I
do not know, but whenever I look upon those faded blos-
soms hanging in a little silver frame above my bed , I
cannot help thinking that, after all, they must have
been endowed with great luck-bringing powers. For
how else could we have overcome the dangers of the
expedition which my reckless fancy made me undertake
that night?

But here let me pause a minute to regain my mental
breath, which this flight into the depths of the past has
hastened and shaken almost as completely out of me
as did the violent breezes of the Isle of Houat on the
night of my risky expedition to its dangerous cliffs.
It is an exquisite torture to thus retrace one's steps, to

34

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

let one's pen and one's mind run smoothly backward,
as it were, like a little frightened, green-coated crab,
blinded by the incoming tide, and seeking rest and
shelter from the noise and danger which it hopes to avoid.
For years I have tried to forget — to wrap my home-sick-
ened soul in oblivion of what once used to be, yet do I
now, with the celebrated inconsequence of I'Eternel
F&minin, ruthlessly reopen old wounds and court burn-
ing regret.

" What fools we mortals be 1" This is not a very poetical
citation, but it is a true one, and serves my purpose well,
for I am in that mood just now which makes one look
at one's self, so to speak, from a distance, and laugh with
absolute sincerity, but nevertheless very bitterly, at one's
own folly for having dared to attempt fighting against
what was ordained. The Turks are our masters in such
matters, as are all Orientals, for they are such delight-
fully convinced fatalists that when they have solemnly
shrugged their shoulders, and sagely decreed that
" What is to be will be," they are content, and take no
thought of the morrow in any sense of the word.

I am far, I see, from having reached such a state of
perfection as yet, and my disappointment thereat is
great. I have schooled myself to conscientiously believe
that by now my dead had buried their dead, and that
the past had drifted away from me like a cast-off gar-
ment which fitted me no longer, but I have lately, some-
how or other, discovered the foolhardiness and folly
of this presumption, and I realize, to my deep mortifica-
tion, that true cynicism and I are not always as good
friends as I believed that we had become.

It is snowing hard as I sit writing by the waning
afternoon light. The sparkling atoms are whirling in
through the window which I opened when I came in a
while ago to cool my throbbing head and my feverish-

35

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

ness. The little drifts which they make upon the car-
pet remind me of similar occasions when I used to let
Father Winter invade my quarters, out of sheer mis-
chievousness, in days of long ago.

What jolly, devil-may-care times those were, and how
long it does seem since I left many precious things be-
hind me, cloaking my self-willed surrender of rank and
honors and of future brilliant certainties under the
mantle of a sort of superb and haughty stoicism, which,
if I am to talk plainly, was not tres bon teint 1

On his desert island Crusoe was a sage, although
before his shipwreck he had been looked upon as by no
means an extraordinarily resigned or easy-going spirit.
My desert island — the one for which I set sail — I have
never quite reached. And if I had — ah! well, what
matters it? what would then have happened there is
no use in surmising. The only fact clear to me is that
I am sometimes wretchedly grieved at my incapability
of shaping things as they should be shaped, and that
I fail only too frequently to follow out the existence
which I had planned for myself, and to which, for the
matter of that, I had thought that I had become per-
fectly reconciled.

Indeed, I am at heart content to be now one of the
crowd, a mere unit among the masses, a plain cipher,
working my way along a far more arduous road than
the one upon which I started out. I often come well-
nigh to fancying that I have forgotten the past, and
if anybody addressed me suddenly, as of yore, I would
not, I feel certain, take the words as being meant for
me.

Well, as we make our bed, so we must lie. There is
never any turning back save in thought. I am dead
to my world. The days of palaces are dead, too.
But what of that? At heart — I repeat it — I am really

36

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

content, perchance far more so than I know myself.
And, thanks to the mischievous spirit which is forever
within me, a rush of unholy joy sometimes floods my
heart and stings me like a million needles at the thought
of how amazed those who are my friends and know
me now would be if they knew ; and what would be the
surprise of those who knew me then could they see the
present as it is! But imagination — la folle du logis,
as they call it in France — is a curse, so let me close this
lengthy and rather purposeless parenthesis and re-
turn to my Breton New Year, car nous en sommes loin.
I fear that I am telling my story too much a batons rom-
pus, and with not a vestige of that solemn and admi-
rably dignified method so dear to celebrated writers and
to Academicians.

What a delightful New Year that last one was I — I
mean the last before my child-heart received its deepest
and worst wound, so far.

During the whole month of December our rugged
coast had been swept by storms of such unusual violence
that I was forced, much against my will, to spend many
hours within the castle walls. At five o'clock on New
Year's Day I was standing at the end of the upper hall,
looking out at the sea and the sky, when my father's
steward happened to pass by. He stopped for a mo-
ment, and, patting my head gently, said, kindly :

"Well, how do you do, my little dear?"

He was an old retainer of our family, which he con-
sidered to be immeasurably above all others through-
out the length and breadth of the land. He was, besides
this, a wise and sagacious fellow, well informed as to
his duties, fairly educated, and, what is better, a true
and loyal Breton.

"I am very well, thank you, Kerradec," I replied;
"but just look what a funny sky this is."

37

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

He glanced at the stormy, cloud-laden heavens, and,
screwing up his white eyebrows, remarked: "So it is,
so it is. I wouldn't be at sea to-night for a good deal.
There is ugly weather coming, as sure as my name is
Yvon Kerradec."

Truly the spectacle presented by the sunset sky must
have been a remarkable one, for I remember it as clearly
to-day as if it were still before me. A murky confusion
of wind-torn clouds was rising from the west, clouds
that had the color of dark copper, with black, metallic
ridges like a crow's wing. The sun was sinking rapidly
towards the horizon amid a heaped-up mass of blood-
red vapors, tinged here and there with green blotches.
The wind, which had been high all day, was now rising
to a gale with an alarming shriek and beating the waters
into froth. Even while we stood there watching the
waves, they began to rise in that utterly confounding
fashion that is so characteristic of our dangerous coast.
They rolled in like high watery walls, crashing against
the rocks on which the castle stands, with hungry, piti-
less energy. Kerradec hurried towards my father's
suite of rooms, and, lifting the heavy portiere, called
out to him that there was a blow coming on which would
mean disaster to any ship running along the coast,
and asking what the orders were for the coast-guards-
men with regard to signalling to the life-saving station
two miles away. Instead of answering, my father,
who was slipping on his dress coat, turned to his valet,
an old soldier who had served under his orders when he
was in the army, and bade him bring another suit of
clothes and his oil-skin coat and sou'wester.

" Run to mamma, Pierrot, and tell her that I may be
late for dinner. I am going down to the beach," he
said, quietly.

I obeyed instantly. But as soon as I had delivered

38

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

the message I flew to my room, donned my own little
storm-suit of oil-clothes with feverish rapidity, and
then bounded down-stairs just as my father was emerg-
ing from his room.

" What, you rogue 1 You imagine that you can come
with me in such weather?" he exclaimed; but I easily
perceived that his indignation was only assumed, and
that he liked to see me anxious to be always at the front.
So I replied, demurely :

" Please take me along, dear papa! I hate to remain
here without you, especially as it is New Year's Day!"

I am afraid that I was a very old-fashioned child
in more than one respect. Which is perhaps explain-
able by the fact that I never played with children of my
own age, but was either alone in the home park or in
the company of grown-up people, whose language and
phraseology I recklessly, and sometimes, no doubt,
very amusingly, borrowed.

Clinging to my father's hand, I descended the nar-
row, spiral stone stairs which led directly from his study
to the cour d'honneur, and then, to my huge delight at
first, the wind began to buffet us. Its deep, sinister
voice moaned all around. The clouds, blacker than
ever, were blown about in a way that was bewildering.
The hollow, hoarse voice of the tempest swelled to posi-
tive fury, and as we reached the bottom of our rocky-
fastness the spume torn from the white crests of the
inruvshing breakers nearly blinded us. My enthusiasm
was oozing out of me, for streaks of cold rain were com-
mencing to pelt us like sharp lances and, under the
pressure of the wind, my breath almost failed me. But
I would not for the world have confessed that I had
been rash in insisting upon coming, and so I set my
lips firmly together and said not a word, holding des-
perately to the strong hands of my two companions.

39

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

The dreadful turmoil increased with every passing
minute. There were moments when the wind whistled
sourly and stridently, as if it were in a paroxysm of
anger, and then, grave, cavernous, and powerful, it
sounded like the weird harmony of some immense cat-
aclysm.

A sinister gloaming that! — showing the gigantic
waves hurling themselves over each other, with a
curtain of grim mists for a background.

We were almost abreast of the little life-saving station
now, and, with a sort of hopeful yearning in my heart, I
gazed upward at the jutting point of rock where the
semaphore (marine signal-house) profiled its gibbet-
like arms against the lowering sky. My father hailed
the men on guard several times, but the snarl of the
hurricane was so great that his voice seemed to have
lost all sound. Finally, with a quick gesture, he picked
me up, and began to climb the slippery steps leading
to the platform half-way up the cliff, where the guerite
of the douaniers clung to the granite wall.

" Donnez la moi done, je la porter ai bien !" shouted
Kerradec, holding out his hands to take me from the
comforting shelter of my father's arms. But unheed-
ing this offer he hurried on, as if the nearly insur-
mountable difficulties of the ascent, in the gathering
gloom which enveloped us as a shroud, and in the teeth
of a storm such as is seldom seen even in Brittany,
were a mere joke.

I hardly heard the orders he gave to insure the prompt
rescue of any vessel unfortunate enough to be skirting
our coast that night, for I was drowsily leaning against
his shoulder, covered by the folds of his great-coat.

When we reached the sands once more we found that
a few men, old sailors all of them, had gathered there
and were looking at the grand and awful spectacle

40

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

with that stolid watchfulness which denotes the mariner
all the world over.

They uncovered their heads as my father approached,
and fell back a little, watching his tall figure with
affectionate pride. For they knew his undaunted
courage, and his mere presence there was reassuring
to these men, who thought of their boys far out at sea,
now, as on every night in the year, drifting helplessly
at the mercy of the elements.

The angry roar of the ocean was the Dies Irae these
mariners had listened to from their boyhood, and the
solemnity thereof lent to their natures much of the
depth and melancholy to which I have already alluded.
Thus had they no actual fear, for in the integrity of
their faith they felt that the murderous waves were
ruled by the will of Almighty God. But their hearts
were filled with the solemn awe and dread of such a
situation.

Ah, no! the Breton fisherman, whose time is em-
ployed, whose bread is earned, by old Father Ocean, is
never smitten with a craven's fear. But he is aware of
the boundless power to sustain or to take life which be-
longs to such forces, and realizes the dangers by which
he is always surrounded. "II faut bien tou jours en
finir un jour ou I'autre," as a bereaved grandfather
once said to me, after hearing of the loss at sea of the
last grandson and sole bread-winner left him. Tears
were weakly coursing down his weather-beaten cheeks,
but a resignation of the finest and bravest kind kept his
old lips from trembling. Men must die, and it does not
matter so much, after all, how they do die — epidemics,
wars, accidents, ah! even broken hearts — all carry
out the laws of nature in that respect. And in the end
what will it signify whether a thousand poor souls more
or less take their flight towards heaven on a night like

41

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

the one I am now speaking of, when the roaring sea
gathers in its quarry?

The lightning flashed now again along the dense
vault above us, where the clouds were riven by sudden
sheets of lurid flame, and I slid from my father's grasp
and clapped my hands, in my ignorant, childish glee. •
Alas! my joy was soon quenched. For the intense
glare showed us two fishing-smacks standing out
against its hellish glow, as they labored among the
murderous rollers.

My father glanced over the distance between the boats
and the beach, with grave care depicted on his hand-
some face. Then, lifting a whistle to his lips, he gave
a well-known call, that pierced even that deafening
clamor.

The two apparently doomed boats were exactly op-
posite to us, and if they were once caught by the current
that runs at mill-race speed between the horn-shaped
ramparts of the inner bay, they would be drawn un-
doubtedly into the breakers. Even I could see that!
Would the life-boat come in time? That was the un-
spoken question depicted in every eye witnessing the
coming horror.

Determinedly my father turned to the men, who, in
their eagerness, now stood shoulder to shoulder with
him.

"Get me a strong rope, quickly!"

Strangely enough I understood, and a new terror
swept over me. To interfere or to implore never oc-
curred to my mind, but I took his hand and kissed it
passionately, clinging to him with a despairing strength
that caused him to recollect my presence, and made him
perhaps realize what his heroic endeavors for the sake
of others would mean to his own little child should he
perish.

42

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Stooping down, he lifted me in his arms, and, whisper-
ing hastily in my ear a few words of comfort and of
encouragement, he handed me to Kerradec, who was in
vain expostulating with him. Trying the strength of
a great coil of rope that had been brought, he began to
throw off his heavy coat. When the lightning shone
out again, one of the boats had disappeared, while the
other could yet be plainly seen in that spectre light, as
it flew on the top of a monstrous wave straight to its
destruction.

"The life -boat is coming," yelled Jinks, who had
joined us without my noticing it. " Wait, my lord, for
nothing will live through this 'ere storm. For Gawd's
sake, don't you go a-drowning of yourself, my lord!"

"Hush, Jinks! What words for Pierrot to hear!" he
answered. "The life-boat will be too late; come, help
me there!"

Jinks was silenced and seemingly abashed. With
his own trembling hands he knotted the t rope about
his master's waist. A glance across the boiling sea
showed all present that the urgency was great indeed,
for the little brown-sailed, dismantled craft was heading
with hideous and relentless rapidity towards the fore-
most scrap of the chain of rocks

A new sight to me, and one which I will never forget,
was the iron resolve in the face which I loved best of all.
It was that of a calm and resolute man, one accustomed
to leadership and to the absolute responsibility of his
actions. I seemed to feel that if I cried out or attracted
his attention towards myself I would only be hindering
the precautions which were being taken for his safety,
so I clung tightly to Kerradec's bull-like neck and kept
my eyes fixed on the superb figure, standing alone in
front of the little crowd, with a rope round his body
and another in his firm, strong hand.

43

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

There came a great thundering wave, and at the
precise moment when it retired I saw my father dash in
after it and disappear between the folds of black water,
as if they were to hold him forever.

Another flash of lightning, and I saw his head above
the livid foam.

" There he is, Kerradec. Oh ! haul him in ; don't let
him go any farther!" I fairly yelled, unconsciously dig-
ging my nails in my helpless bearer's flesh.

" Quiet, my little one, quiet ! He knows what he is
about, and the saints will protect him ! Be quiet, I
say!"

I was quiet enough after this admonition ; my heart
beat to suffocation, but all my powers seemed to have
passed into my straining eyes. Instinct told me that
death was hovering over him, that the boldest daring
was as a wisp of straw against the might of that in-
furiated mass of water. I bit my little clinched fist in
my agony to repress the sobs that filled my heaving
chest. I doubt whether I fathomed the boundlessness
of my apprehension or the immensity of my enthusiasm ;
for, in spite of all, the feeling that I was witnessing
the most magnificent thing on earth — an exhibition of
flawless courage, a total abnegation of self in the cause
of humanity, welled up in my heart. A few days be-
fore, my Abbe" had given me a fine old engraving rep-
resenting the gladiators before Caesar, and I suddenly re-
membered the Latin inscription, " Moriturite salutant. "
Was it not a fitting greeting for those doomed men on
the wreck to give to their would-be rescuer? This
thought may seem ridiculous, bred as it was from a small
child's terrified fancy, but nevertheless, to this day,
whenever I come across that short sentence in print, it
carries me back with painful swiftness to that awful
night on the Brittany coast when the first dawning

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

of what life would be to me without my father filled
me with despair.

Another and yet another sheet of lurid, ghastly light-
ning showed us the bold swimmer amid the churning
waters steadily nearing the shattered bark. Then the
unnatural glow died out, and impenetrable darkness
lay over the bay. What happened during these inde-
scribable moments of suspense I only heard later, for the
limit of my childish emotions had been reached, and I
realized nothing clearly again until I found myself
kneeling beside him, where they had drawn him up
on the wet sand, clinging passionately to his prostrate
form, and listening, as in a dream, to the shouts of those
about us who were proclaiming in wellnigh delirious
tones that he had saved six lives.

"But he is dead! He is dead!" I cried, hoarsely.
" Saints anges du Paradis, rendez le moi."

His eyes unclosed, faintly he drew me towards him,
and as he did so he murmured :

" C'est fini; ne pleure pas, mon petit enfant."

It is the privilege of dramatists and of novelists to
shift their scenery with bewildering swiftness in order
to suit their purpose. This is natural, since they wish
to extort as much artificial emotion as possible from
an ever-ready and sensation-loving public. The tan-
talizing asterisks which often divide interesting chap-
ters, like neat but painful sword-cuts, have been in-
vented by litterateurs for no other purpose than to ease
up situations which have reached a towering climax,
and to precipitate the earnest readers from a nerve-
shaking situation into some sunlit, summer valley,
where the rustle of foliage, stirred by fragrant breezes,
the splashing of oars on the surface of azure lakes or

45

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

rivers, is conjured up by the cunning of the writer, with
the eminently praiseworthy object of soothing their deep-
ly stirred and painfully excited imaginations.

I am, alas! not a novelist, far less a dramatist, and
I cannot presume, therefore, to tamper greatly with
the tricks of the trade, useful as they might prove to be
to a humble chronicler of real life like myself. It is un-
fortunate, because the incidents of real life are so tame
when compared with those of fiction that a ray or two of
limelight, judiciously applied, as is done on the stage
aux grands moments, would serve my turn admirably
now. As it is, I can only utter a befitting mea culpa,
and deplore my sad lack of ability, before proceeding
with my unambitious recital of every-day events.

There was a suggestion of divine forgiveness in the
air as we returned to the castle. The waves were
tossed more gently upon the beach by the gradually
relenting wind, and the sea-mews, whose peaceful
slumbers had been disturbed by nature's ferocious
orchestra, circled above our heads with much flutter-
ing of their broad pinions. I was too tired and also
too young to realize the pathos of this return to joy
and calm, while so close to us in the depths of the
cruel ocean the stiffening limbs and cadaverous faces
of the drowned were settling to their eternal sleep. In
spite of my high-strung nature, I was nearly asleep
when I was borne into the hall that to my blinking
eyes seemed a fairy palace worthy of any of my
favorite heroes.

My mother's low, high-bred voice woke me from my
torpor. She was remonstrating with my father, and
so absolutely unbearable and cruel did her reproaches
seem to me that I jumped from the fur-covered lounge
near the fire where I had been put, arid confronted her.

"I won't have it!" I cried, excitedly. "Oh, mother!

46

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

mother! I low can you speak of yourself after what
he has done to-night! I low can you think of your
anxiety and your pain when he is here all drenched and
cold and worn-out, and when he has saved six lives
from that black death out there! You are cruel, cruel!
like a beautiful, bad fairy!" I concluded, in a passion
of uncontrollable tears.

My haughty lady mother gazed at me in amaze-
ment, with the contempt which this outburst surely
deserved.

"Recollect yourself!" she said, sternly. "Whom do
you think you are talking to?" And then, turning
towards my father, who was about to draw my shiver-
ing little figure to the shelter of his arms, she contin-
ued, in her own cold, disdainful way :

"Your system of education is not successful. The
child is becoming unmanageable."

"Hush, Vera!" he murmured, softly. "Pierrot will
beg your pardon later. Now we are both unfit for fur-
ther parlance, and must beg you to excuse us." And
suiting the action to the words, he lifted me from where
I crouched at his feet, and carried me up the broad
stairs to his rooms, while she stood as one transfixed
watching us, her shining silken draperies and the
frosty fires of her magnificent jewels clothing her in a
glitter like that of an angry moonbeam.

That night, when the much -delayed ceremonious
New Year's dinner was ended, I was brought down as
usual to the banqueting-hall. All my fatigue and my
sorrow had gone, and nothing but the intense pride
of being the child of such a father as mine re-
mained. How noble he looked, with his face still white
and drawn, and with the dark, hollow circles under his
eyes painted there by his recent struggle with death !

The country magnates who sat at his hospitable

47

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

board looked up at him with positive reverence, it
seemed to me, and drank his health again and again,
while outside the dull sound of the passing-bell which
was being tolled for those peri & la mer mingled with
the booming of the sea.

My mother, as radiant as ever, ignored me entirely.
I knew that I had offended her as I never had before,
and that the perfunctory forgiveness granted me at
the urgent request of my father counted for nothing.
I must make this confession complete, moreover, by
adding that I was by no means in a contrite frame of
mind. The events of that afternoon had awakened me
from the white, dreamy sleep of infancy ; and, sitting
in angry and silent judgment on my mother, I unhesi-
tatingly condemned her. May Almighty God forgive
me for it! So deep was my resentment that I felt as
if every vestige of filial affection for her was gone from
my heart forever. Had she not blamed my father for
proving himself a hero once more?

At midnight, when I knelt before my little wooden
image of the Blessed Virgin, I deliberately omitted my
mother's name from my prayers, and went to bed with
a guilty conscience and a heavy heart.

CHAPTER HI

" The coldness from my heart is gone

But still the weight is there,
And thoughts which I abhor will come
To tempt me to despair!"

THE salt breeze was blowing violently in my face
and flapping the hood of my little mackintosh over my
head as I walked rapidly along the narrow path crossing
the dunes. I was in a fearful temper, angry with my-
self and all the world besides, and smarting under a
sense of injustice which made me set my teeth hard
and stamp my foot occasionally as I flew onward follow-
ed by a breathless groom who did his best to follow me.

The weather was in absolute keeping with my mood,
for a storm amounting almost to a hurricane had been
raging throughout the night, and even now in the late
afternoon the leaden-hued sky hung above the tossing
waves of the bay like a pall and threw a ghastly green-
ish light upon the beach strewn with torn- up sea- weed
and tossed-up bowlders.

Worse and worse grew the weather. Huge black
clouds seemed to close around me, and the wind bullied
me so furiously that the much-alarmed groom was forced
to hold me with both hands to prevent my being carried
away by the overwhelming gusts. On, on, I sped, gasp-
ing for breath as fatigue began to give place to excite-
ment, but fortunately the turreted roofs of the Chateau
de la Fee, as my grandmother's residence was called,
began to appear, dimly silhouetted against the angry
sky, and in a few moments we came to a mullioned side
D 49

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

entrance, overhung with ivy and drooping creepers. I
rang the bell with a violence that awoke echoes through-
out the building. An old man-servant opened the
door immediately, and stood bowing low, but with an
expression in his honest blue eyes which brought me
partly to my senses, and made me realize what my dis-
hevelled appearance might be after my fight with the
weather. Fortunately I cared little for what old Jean
thought of me, one way or the other. He had known
me since I was born, and was, besides this, one of the
last specimens of a long-departed class — a devoted, re-
spectful family retainer, who would never have per-
mitted himself to judge les mattres, however extrav-
agantly they might act. Telling him that I must
see my grandmother at once, I ran up the stone stair-
case, where huge tapestries and inlaid sets of armor
added to the mediaeval aspect of the place, and rushed
into the apartment, half boudoir, half library, where I
was certain to find my father's venerable mother.

The sight which met my eyes as I entered was
of a nature to restore calm to the most rebellious
spirit, and it acted upon me like a shower of cold
water, making me instantly more rational in mind
as well as in behavior. The room, which for many
years to come was to be my one harbor of peace and
rest, was large, and furnished in exquisite taste, though
with a tendency towards the fashions of two hundred
years ago. The Italian cabinets and tables were pon-
derous and massive. The hangings were sombre,
and the walls were hung with many celebrated paint-
ings and family portraits. Comfort of a more modern
kind was not by any means excluded, however, and
the whole aspect of this delightfully romantic chamber
was brightened by quantities of flowering plants and
palms that stood in heavy inlaid jardinieres. Clusters

50

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

of Bengal roses and heather, set in shallow bowls of
ancient pottery, nearly always filled the air with their
clean, faint perfume, and the tastes of the mistress of
all these treasures were divulged by a grand piano, a
harmonium, a spinet with a beautifully painted lid,
an easel set by one of the windows, and a litter of books
and music. There, too, near the monumental hearth
of carved green marble, stood an embroidery frame,
indicating that she was not an idler, but a woman who,
in spite of her years, found pleasure in a well-occupied,
busy life.

As I came in, she rose from a low chair which she had
been occupying, while gazing at the vast panorama
of land and sea stretching before the balcony windows
at the other end of the room, and came towards me with
outstretched arms. At nearly eighty, my grandmother
was one of the prettiest old women I have ever known ;
she looked like a fairy godmother, and it is scarcely a
wonder that the simple peasant folks should have called
her lovely home le Chateau de la Fee.

Her hair was like spun silk, in its soft and silvery
whiteness. Her pink-and-white complexion and her
large, black-fringed, dark-blue eyes had retained all
the dewy eclat of youth. Her figure was still straight
and slender, while her tiny hands and feet were shaped
like those of a Greek statue. Clothed in sweeping ivory-
tinted laces, with a great Byzantine cross of emeralds,
sapphires, and onyx hanging at her throat, amid her
far-famed pearls — pearls which she wore day and night,
according to a superstitious belief in their luck-bring-
ing influence — she seemed to me at this moment es-
pecially the very embodiment of all that was sweet and
dainty, delightful and comforting, and I felt suddenly
ashamed of my tumbled locks and flushed face.

"What on earth is the matter, my dearest child?"

5i

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

she said, gently, as with a gasping, exhausted sob I
threw myself down before her on a cushion and buried
my face in her lap.

"Everything is the matter/' I gasped, clutching her
dress, as a thoroughly frightened child is apt to do
when in great distress of mind. "I — well, I wish I
were dead!" With which last words I burst into a veri-
table agony of pent-up tears.

For a moment my grandmother said nothing. She
quietly removed my bedraggled coat, smoothed my short,
rebellious locks, and contented herself with some mute
caresses, until the first paroxysm of my grief had spent
itself. Then she drew me towards the bright fire of
blazing logs, and in her calm, even, musical voice asked,
softly :

"This is not at all like you, Pierrot. What has
caused you to lose your self-control so completely, my
dear?"

" Oh!" I exclaimed, wrathfully, " you are right, grand-
m&re. I know that I am unmanly and stupid, but I
hate injustice, and when papa is not there I get noth-
ing else — and — oh! it drives me wild!"

"Hush! Hush!" murmured the kind voice of my
lovely granny; "do not speak like that. You are not
yourself just now, my poor little one. You must have
something to eat and a short rest, and then I will talk
this matter over with you."

I gazed at her in surprise. What could she say that
would have any influence upon a subject so excessively
painful to me? But still there was something so sym-
pathetic and persuasive in her tone that I suffered her
to take me to her dressing-room, where the disorder of
my costume was quickly repaired, before I went down-
stairs to have tea with her. At first I could not swallow
a mouthful. But gradually the warmth and cosiness

52

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

of my surroundings, the charmingly appointed little
table, with its dainty china, brilliant silver, flowers,
fruit, and cake, and, more than all, the loving care be-
stowed upon me, acted like a balm, and when we had
finished our gouter I felt very much better. Then,
drawing me dowrn beside her in the depths of her capa-
cious berg&re, she gazed at me with a thoughtful ex-
pression, which I had often seen on her delicate features,
but which to-night was tinged with a deep sadness that
I had never noticed before.

Suddenly she bent forward and, crossing her white,
slim hands, said, in a low, tender voice :

" My poor little Pierrot ! You are too young to under-
stand most things yet. But you are an unusually
bright and clever child, and I am going to try the ex-
periment of talking to you as if you were what you so
picturesquely call a 'grown-up.' '

The big room was perfectly still. Alone the ticking
of the huge Louis XIV. clock could be heard during
the ensuing pause, for the storm had ceased and the
red rays of the setting sun were breaking out between
banks of gold-lined clouds, sending a ruddy glow in
through the tall oriel windows. Granny sat in deep
thought for a moment, as if she had momentarily for-
gotten my presence, her still so remarkably youthful
eyes looking full into the rosy sunset, and I sat under a
kind of strange spell, watching the gems sparkle on
her fingers and the gleam of the pearls about her neck.
My grievances came back to me as I did so with re-
doubled vigor, although I felt sorry to have brought so
much perturbation into the crystal-like purity and ex-
quisite refinement of the atmosphere which invariably
surrounded my grandmother. Perchance she was
right to say that I was too young to understand many
things, but I am sure that I felt some of them acutely.

53

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

The cause of my present troubles was an innocent one
enough, and one which I loved, for the beginning of this
period of revolt and dissatisfaction had been brought
about in the following fashion before the outset of the
summer, when I literally lived in the park and gardens,
taking my daily lessons there with my dear old Abbe,
under the spreading boughs of flowering laburnums
and lilac-trees. The gardens at home, sheltered from
the ocean winds by enormous crenellated walls as an-
cient as the castle itself, were really a thing of beauty,
and the pride of both my parents, from whom I have
inherited my intense devotion to flowers. My own par-
ticular corner was one of my greatest preoccupations.
I dug and planted and pruned and watered my plants,
and was continually making inroads upon the superb
plattes - bandes and hot -houses of the head gardener,
who always threatened to disclose my numberless
thefts to " The Great Powers/' and yet never did so,
poor old man, for he loved me dearly, and had been
in my grandfather's service before my father was
born.

One morning early that spring I was very busy
with a plot of reseda and cockle-shells, which I was at-
tempting to transplant. My Abbe", sitting on a garden
bench near-by, was piously reading his breviary, and
my dog Bataille was lying in the sun, occasionally
catching a gnat with a snap of his big, lazy jaws. I
was so absorbed in my work that I did not notice my
father as he approached and stood close beside me. My
name, softly pronounced, made me turn round, and then
I saw him. His hands were behind his back, and on
his face was a serious yet joyful expression, which struck
me at once.

"Oh, papa, what is it?" I cried, throwing my spade
with a crash upon the gravelled walk.

54

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

"Pierrot, what do you think? The blessed angels
have brought you a little brother!"

I stared hard at him ; then, with one of my unexpected,
reckless bounds, I threw myself literally upon him.

"Have you got him behind your back? Show him
to me, papa! Please show him to me!"

This was too much even for the Abbess gravity, and
he burst into a roar of laughter, in which my father
joined heartily. When their merriment had subsided,
and the worthy priest had been thanked for the con-
gratulations which he poured forth from the depths of his
honest soul, I was taken into the house to view the little
stranger. I was a little offended at having been laughed
at, but I did not like to say so, and when my father took
me in his arms to carry me up-stairs, as was often his
custom, I nestled against his shoulder and patted his
cheek with my little hands, grimy from gardening
though they were.

My mother's room was slightly darkened by rose-
colored blinds, and she lay in bed, looking so lovely
that she made me think of the little Madonna of Cor-
reggio which hung in my father's room. Beside her,
on a lace-covered cushion, was a really magnificent,
fat, rosy, blue-eyed baby, with tiny rings of golden hair,
as fine as fils de la Vierge, on its soft, round head. I
gazed speechlessly at this picture, listened mechanically
to the twittering of a little bird bursting its tiny throat
with gleeful melody in the garden below, and in my
amazement took no notice of the hand extended to me
by my mother.

"This is your little brother, Pierrot; won't you kiss
him?" she said, in a weak voice, which did not sound
like her own at all.

"Do not speak, my dearest! Do not tire yourself,"
whispered my father, and, pushing me forward, he con-

55

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

tinued, " Kiss your little brother, Pierrot, but go softly
about it." Thus admonished I bent gently down and
pressed my lips to the smooth forehead, but I did not
like the feeling of that yielding, velvety flesh under my
lips, and I drew back quickly.

"Are you afraid of him?" said the nurse, a tall, lean,
white-capped woman whom I had not observed before.
I shrugged my shoulders, and, in a voice loud enough to
be heard at the farther end of the next room, I exclaimed
that I was afraid of nothing, "of nothing at all in the
whole world!" A queer smile lighted up my mother's
pale face, and, turning her head a little towards me, she
said, proudly :

" Is it not a beautiful baby, Pierrot — so big and plump
and rosy?"

A singular feeling clutched at my heart for a second.
"Ah, yes!" thought I, "a beautiful one, plump and big
and rosy! Not small and pale and gray-eyed like me!"
But as I was a rather good child, in spite of my many
faults, I answered : " Yes, Matushka, it is very pretty
— just like a wax doll," and then, hastily kissing my
mother's hand, which she had let fall on the coverlet, I
flew out of the room, pursued by the " Gently, gently,
my child!" spoken somewhat angrily by the white-
capped nurse.

My daily life was by no means altered by this ad-
dition to our family. I saw yet a little less of my mother
than I had done before, for she was so wrapped up in
her new and precious possession that she devoted her
entire time to little Bertrand, and for some to me quite
unexplainable reason she invariably called him the
Son and Heir. This woman of the world, fond of
pleasure and of amusement, became a model mamma
with the advent of the baby, who from the first moment
was treated by everybody excepting by my father, who

56

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

never dislodged me from my estate in his affections, as
the autocrat of the entire household before whom all
were forced to bend the knee.

I loved this little brother dearly, but I would have
loved him far more had I not been strictly forbidden to
touch him or to approach him except by special permis-
sion. As it was, I soon learned to hold aloof, and con-
tinued to do so until the magnetic attraction radiating
from him proved too strong to be resisted.

The summer with its customary series of out-door
pleasures, the fishing in the shallow pools at the foot
of the cliffs, the long hours of paddling in the wet sands
or amid the big rocks made slippery by sea-weed, and
among which I gathered mussels, small oysters, clams,
and other treasures, including huge green crabs and
jelly-fish, were enjoyed as heretofore. More than ever I
adored the sea, and ran in and out of the water twenty
times a day in hot weather, so much so, indeed, that my
mother, enthroned on a cane arm-chair, sheltered by a
colossal sun-shade on the sands, with the baby's nurse
beside her and a novel on her lap, warned me languidly
to be careful lest my feet should become webbed like
unto those of a duck.

As time went on I realized more and more that
strange times, indeed, had come to pass, and that I was
in some way a source of continual irritation to my
mother and to all those who formed her own clique,
or miniature court. I was unceasingly reproved when
my own dear daddy was out of hearing, and my child-
ish heart began to swell with a sense of perpetual injus-
tice which I was, however, too proud to confess to him.

This unenviable state of affairs reached its climax
during a short trip which he was forced to undertake
to Paris, and which the dangerously hot weather report-
ed from there prevented me from sharing with him.

57

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

My mother was still a model parent to me in many ways.
She was ever heedful of my needs, both of body and of
brain. But I felt, as young children feel what they can-
not explain — and in this case it was — that since my
brother's advent into her life I had become an unim-
portant member of the household. When, by chance,
I touched her, I felt numb and cold. Yet I was not
at all jealous of that beautiful baby who was her idol.
On the contrary, I loved him passionately, and soon
displayed the same ruses which had once distinguished
my secret intercourse with the eagle " Fulvius," in or-
der to steal to the nursery when the little fellow was
alone with his attendants.

How I did coax them to let me hold him for a minute,
or to kiss his soft, little face, or his morsels of chubby
hands, like crumpled apple-blossoms! He was begin-
ning to know me, and often crowed with delight when
I came in, much to my gratification. Moreover, there
was a flavor of forbidden fruit in these stolen interviews,
which made them a thousandfold more attractive to me,
for I felt that I was doing a doughty deed and risking
terrible consequences by thus infringing my mother's
orders. Nor was I mistaken in this, as I was doomed
to soon discover.

On the afternoon of my hurried flight to my grand-
mother's "Fairy Castle," when reaching home after a
long ride with Jinks, I entered the house by a side
door, and, cautiously threading my way through the
long galleries and up the back staircase, I came at
last to the day-nursery. Opening the door noiselessly,
to my joy and surprise I found the baby lying on a thick
rug, enclosed by a movable barrier of cushioned bamboo,
and gazing with that peculiar vacant stare of the very
young at the painted ceiling above. Evidently his
nurses had left him there out of harm's way for a few

58

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

moments, for I heard their voices in the adjoining lin-
gerie, as they laughed and chatted.

Here was my opportunity. Very carefully I stepped
over the low barrier and, sitting down, drew the little
lace-shrouded bundle of soft, warm babyhood on my
lap. I was shaking with excitement, and my joy was
boundless when I discovered that the tiny autocrat
did not resent my intrusion, but allowed me to fondle
him as much as I pleased. Nay, I fancied that he ac-
tually winked his big blue eyes at me, just as if he en-
tered into the spirit of this unusual spree. Again and
again I kissed his round cheeks and clasped his wee
ringers, which closed vigorously about mine, and I
became so absorbed in this blissful pastime that I did
not hear the light footsteps of small booted feet, nor
notice that \ was discovered in flagranti-delicto until
a sudden shadow intercepted the light from the nearest
window, and fell like a menacing cloud upon the baby's
upturned, dimpled face.

" So this is how you obey me, is it?"

The voice was astonishingly cold and stern, almost
cruelly metallic, and my mother, in her tight-fitting
riding-habit, her slender hands clinched upon the handle
of her whip, struck terror to my usually very dauntless
little heart.

The slow, suffocating beating of my heart sounded
loudly in my ears, like the regular strokes of a merciless
sledge-hammer. I put the baby down on the rug with
lingering tenderness, and then stood up, squared my
shoulders, and forced myself to look my mother full in
the eyes. All the imperiousness of a long line of an-
cestors who had been leaders of men and had known
no rule but their own caprice rose in my entire being
like a swiftly rushing tide. My fear vanished, and I
determined to fight for what I considered my rights.

59

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

With a step my mother reached me and put her hand
heavily on my shoulder.

" You young hawk ! Lower those bold eyes when I
speak to you/' she said, harshly. "Do you think that
you are master here? Not so, my haughty one! Nous
avons change tout cela. You dare to disobey your
mother ? Ask my forgiveness at once ! ' '

I remained stubbornly and resolutely silent and ob-
stinate.

"Do you hear me?" she continued, now evidently
beside herself with fury, and scarcely measuring the
value of her words. "You are robbing your brother of
his father's love. You are more to him than even I
am, and it is time that you should be put back where
you belong, you little usurper!

" O Venus ! Schone Frau meine ;
Ihr seid eine Teufelinne 1"

An angry woman! Is there a fiercer thing on earth?
Hardly, I think, especially when the woman is young
and fair and high-bred, for then it is as if one witnessed
the fall of an angel. " Eine Teufelinne!'3

Those flashing black eyes, that marmorean skin,
white with passion, the drawn crimson lips showing
the pearly teeth clinched rigidly, gave one the impres-
sion of a fiend broken loose! And yet — this was my
mother, the mother whom I had known in other moods,
on whose knee I had sometimes rested my head, who
had stooped over me in my childish dreams, whom I had
always been so proud of in spite of all !

" You have no right to speak like that," I cried. " If
papa was here you would not dare to! I've done no
harm, and you are always cruel and unjust to me!"

I was so indignant, so deeply roused, that a red mist

60

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

seemed to fill the room, and I doubled my fists till my
nails cut the flesh of my hands. Fleet was the retribu-
tion. I had never as yet been beaten, but now I tasted
for the first time, in all its fulsomeness, the bitter humil-
iatioti of corporal punishment. Down came the supple
leash of the hunting -whip upon my shoulders, not once,
but twenty times at least, before I realized the horror
of what was happening to me. Then, with a yell of
rage, I snatched at the knout-like weapon, and with sur-
prising force I hurled it out of the window, smashing the
thick glass thereof to atoms. Gathering myself togeth-
er, I ran like a pursued animal out of the room, down
the broad stairs, and into the stable-yard, in search of
dear, sympathetic old Jinks. There was nobody in
sight save my own faithful little groom, a lad of fifteen,
who was devoted to me, and who, seeing me dishevelled
and shaken by dry, convulsive sobs, rushed towards
me and laid hands on me.

I shook him off with as little difficulty as had he been
a feather — such was my excitement — and ran on at full
speed through the park with the lad following in my
track.

The smallest details of this wretched chain of events
were before me again as I now watched my grand-
mother, and yet I hesitated to tell even her, whom I loved
so devotedly, what had happened. It had to be done,
however, and so, with flaming cheeks and halting
speech, I finally made a clean breast of the whole matter.

There was no doubt about her being greatly moved.
When I came to the description of the ignominious
thrashing that had been administered to me, the effect on
her was far greater than I could have imagined. The
high-bred face of the old aristocrat grew set and stern,
her eyes flashed like live sapphires, and she drew herself
up with what I saw was indignation, pure and simple.

61

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Tears of mortification had risen to my eyes, and, en-
couraged by my grandmother's silence, I exclaimed,
spitefully :

"We will see what papa says to this!"

Quick as lightning her fingers were placed on my lips,
and, in a tone serious and solemn enough to frighten
me thoroughly, she said, with much decision :

"Your father will say nothing, because I trust that
through you at least he will never hear of this — this
out — this unfortunate incident."

"Nothing?" I echoed, extremely perturbed.

"Certainly, nothing! Would you play the part of
informer on your mother, and even in such a case could
you see your way to justify your glaring disobedience,
or your violence, not to call it by a harsher name?"

I hung my head.

" Vous I'avez voulu, mon enfant I C'est la guerre!"
she added, sadly, "your mother will not forgive you this
day's work, but I do not think that she will speak to
your father about it."

"Of course she won't," I murmured. "She knows
that he would not stand having me beaten like a dog —
yes, like a dog, grandmamma — I the eldest son, who
will some time be the head of the family."

" Hush, hush! I cannot allow you to say such things,"
and almost to herself she murmured, woefully, " Voila
bien ce que j'attendais I"

At this juncture a footman appeared at the door, and
announced no less a personage than my mother. With
a smothered exclamation I jumped to my feet and stood
anxiously watching the meeting of these two thorough-
paced women of the world, under whose exquisite court-
liness and polish I had somehow or other instinctively
guessed long ago that no great love was concealed.

I had never realized as completely as I did now the

62

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

inimitable grace, the languor, ease, and the absolute
mastery of any situation, however difficult it might
prove to be, which were such marked characteristics
of my mother. She was, indeed, a perfect type of that
most alarming of animals, a great mondaine, unham-
pered by the small scruples and the diflidence begotten
by a tender heart.

I looked on with the fascination of a bird gazing at a
snake, while she bent before her mother-in-law — the only
being in the world of whom she stood in some awe, I
believe — and raised the latter's hand to her lips. I had
seen this form of homage repeated on every occasion
when the two women had met in my presence. But to-
day it impressed me with a sense of insincerity on one
side and of bare toleration on the other, which left an
unpleasant impression on my mind.

"I am sorry that this unruly child should have dis-
turbed you, ma m&re," said my mother, with gracious
apology in her dulcet tones, "and I have come to send
Pierrot home if you will permit it. His father will re-
turn in the morning, and, as you know, he would miss
him sadly should he find him absent upon his arrival."

"You will have some tea, Vera, before thinking of
going/' replied my grandmother, and, turning to me,
she bade me go and tell the butler to refill the samovar.
" You need not come back, Pierrot, until I send for you,
as you have had your gofiter already ; you can go to the
gardener and ask him for some of your favorite carna-
tions to take away with you."

I understood perfectly why I was thus sent away.
And I was by no means displeased to avoid the impend-
ing explanation between my mother and grandmother.
The carnations were, of course, a mere excuse, for I was
not allowed, as a rule, to go near the wonderful col-
lections of multi-colored blossoms which were the talk

63

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

of the whole country-side. I thought, with a return of
my eternal insousiance, that, after all, h quelque chose
malheur est bon, as I walked towards the glass-houses,
followed by Pirame, the great bloodhound, so gentle
to his friends and so fierce to his foes, who shuffled
along on his huge, noiseless pads, thrusting his damp
nose in my hand, en vieux camarade.

Naturally, I was not informed of what took place dur-
ing the memorable half -hour of my absence, but the
result of the interview between the two grandes puis-
sances was a surprising one. When I returned to
the room, tenderly carrying a sheath of odorous car-
nations, given me by special command, the two
women were to all appearances peacefully discuss-
ing the strange inclemency of the weather, and my
mother's dark, slumberous eyes scanned me with a
nonchalant indulgence to which I had not of late been
accustomed.

"Your grandmother has been kind enough to plead
your cause, and has been so successful/' she murmured,
with unwonted suavity, and with an amiable conde-
scension which was marked by poignant irony and
which I did not like — the melodious voice was so re-
lentless in spite of the apparent kindliness of the words
— "that I am ready to forgive your extraordinary be-
havior, provided you feel genuinely repentant."

Restive little beast that I was, I could not bring my-
self to reply in a proper fashion, indeed. I would have
liked nothing better than to throw down my precious
burden of flowers and run from the room, rather than
face the necessity of expressing totally absent regrets,
for my past ill conduct.

I had often gloried in my childish pride at the thought
that my forefathers had died on the scaffold, in the
grim slaughter of Quiberon, and at the time of the Cru-

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

sades, that they had been loyal and plucky beyond
all things always, that they had been incapable of ut-
tering a lie to save themselves even from the most awful
predicaments. I knew that their atmosphere had been
one of fidelity, of courage, and of dignity. Why should
I, then, their descendant, claim to be sorry when noth-
ing was further from my mind. Furthermore, my
mother would know perfectly well that I was merely
cringing to avoid further chastisement, and this was
bitter gall to me.

Fortunately, my grandmother came to the rescue.
Drawing me towards her, she said, persuasively : " There

I is never any shame in confessing one's wrong-doings,
Pierrot, or in asking pardon for an offence. It is the
truest and noblest form of courage to do so."
Thus adjured, I looked up less dejectedly and said, in
a low, shamed voice, hardly above a whisper :
"I beg your forgiveness, mother/'
A slight frown drew her delicately pencilled brows
together. Such an amende honorable did not satisfy
her, evidently. The famous theory about la voix du
sang is, I fear, a mere illusion, for it is by no means a
spontaneous or an irresistible growth, and just then I
felt acutely that whatever amour maternel my mother
might have felt for me once was now obliterated by an
all-engrossing passion for her last-born, and also by
some other cause which I was quite unable to com-
prehend.

A cold shiver ran between my shoulders when I took
her extended hand and brushed it with my lips. My
heart was extraordinarily heavy, but I did not like to
have this noticed, and so I withdrew to the window
under pretence of admiring my flowers, taking but
slight heed of the " voila qui est arrange1, mais ne recom~
men^ez plus" uttered by my parent, and which seemed
E 65

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

to me to be the promise of a mere truce instead of the
beginning of better things.

I looked forward with dread to the drive home which
I supposed I should have to take with her, for her horses
were just then curvetting and prancing beneath the
windows. Fortunately, I was spared this mauvais quart
d'heure. In my agitation I had not noticed that she was
already dressed for a dinner which she was to attend
at the chateau of the famous sporting Baron de la
H. J., whose skill when hunting boars and wolves in
his own immense woods was only equalled by his lordly
hospitality. A long, soft wrap of white Indian crepe,
embroidered with silver threads, partly concealed her
primrose-hued gown, and the little hood which she now
carefully drew over her head framed her almost perfect
face in a halo of lace that enhanced its cameo-like
beauty. While slipping her bracelets and porte-bon-
heurs over her white Suede gloves, she said, in her or-
dinary cool, well-modulated voice :

" Your grandmother is kind enough to send you home
with Jean, and has asked me to let you take dinner
with her, Dushka. I am delighted to conform to her
wishes in the matter, and only hope that my leniency
will encourage you to behave better in the future than
you have in the past.

When my mother called me "Dushka" — which in
Russian means something like "my little soul" — she
reached the utmost limits of maternal tenderness, for
that was the only endearing name which she ever used
towards me. I was all the more astonished, therefore.,
to hear her use it now, and could not help thinking, glee-
fully and rebelliously, that "she had gotten it hot and
heavy" indeed from granny, for else she wrould not
have gone so far out of her way to be kind to me after
my defiant attitude towards her.

66

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

If this was the case, I, at any rate, received no enlight-
enment on the subject, for when my Lady Mother had
taken her departure I was treated to a little sermon, ten-
derly but firmly administered by the darling old woman
whom I cherished with all my heart, and whose favorite
grandchild I knew well that I was.

While she was talking to me I stood pensively on the
balcony, one of the long windows having been thrown
open to let in the balmy evening breeze, laden with the
perfume of flowers and the freshness of the ocean, and
watched the gulls flying lazily about in the purified
atmosphere. I have always loved gulls, they are such
irrepressible, noisy, silvery creatures; and "Granny's
Gulls," as I used to call them, were old friends of mine
which I took the utmost pleasure in feeding whenever
I came to see her. The instant I showed myself they
used to wheel round and come rushing towards me
with harsh, discordant cries meant no doubt for joyful
greetings, but which on that special occasion grated on
my nerves, for I was feeling very much bruised, both
morally and physically.

Being very honest when in self-communion, even
in those days I admitted to myself that my mother had
good and just cause this time to be deeply angered, but
yet, la voix de la nature said nothing to me, and I was
simply humiliated to have placed myself absolutely
dans mon tort.

Indeed, I felt somehow like a soldier who runs away
before the enemy. Why had I not faced the music and
taken my punishment, however hard it was, like a man,
instead of flying for sanctuary. That thought hurt
me deeply, and degraded me in my own eyes. Insubor-
dination towards a superior officer ! " I ought to have
been shot/' I muttered between my teeth, dispersing the
importunate gulls with a wild wave of my outspread

67

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

arms and a vicious stamp upon the stone floor of the
balcony, which hurt my foot considerably. The sea,
the rocks, the sand, the greenish-blue sky, and the gor-
geous setting sun all went round me in that whirl of
wrath like spinning tops, and I suddenly felt like crying
out with sheer vexation of spirit.

At home I never was allowed to come down in the
evening before dessert was on the table, as I have al-
ready stated, but my grandmother treated me different-
ly, and on the rare occasions when I remained with her
after tea-time I took my dinner in her company, proud
of the honor, and behaving as decorously as I could
in order to show my gratitude and appreciation of this
high favor.

On that particular night her old friend the Marquis
de FA. arrived upon the scene and cheered us up
with his wittily told hunting stories. A famous sports-
man, the marquis was the glad possessor of an unrival-
led equipage de chasse. His horses and hounds were
regarded by true connoisseurs as superior to all
others. His castle contained a remarkable sport-
ing museum, and in the library, among other count-
less treasures, was a hunting -book recording many
celebrated boar-hunts of the last century. I was aw-
fully fond of him, and never tired of hearing his de-
lightful yarns about fur and feather; indeed, to be
noticed by the master of the white-liveried A. hunt
— the oldest in France — was a distinction which I fully
appreciated and greatly plumed myself upon.

That night I enjoyed a fete complete, for, instead of
being sent home at half-past seven, my grandmother
apparently forgot me, and I sat as quiet as a mouse on a
hassock between the two old friends, who discussed at
great length the chances of the coming hunting season.
Until recently my grandmother had still followed the

68

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

hounds, and her renunciation of this her dearest pleas-
ure was by no means due to the infirmities of age, but,
as she candidly confessed, to a sort of fausse honte and a
quasi observance of conventionalities which are silly,
indeed, when they condemn so hale and hearty a wom-
an as she was to relinquish her distinguished place in
the hunting-field, merely because she has attained the
time when her less privileged sisters are prostrated by
the weight of years.

"Ah, mon ami," she said, with a positively girlish
laugh, " how much I do miss the cool, bracing mornings
when we used to start bright and early at the tail of the
pack — the dear doggies joyfully rushing out of the
kennels while we were mounting our impatient and ea-
ger horses. I often catch myself humming the ever-
welcome lines of the ' Sortie du Chenil.' You know —

" ' Sortez du Chenil,

Mes vaillants limiers. •
II faut aujourd'hui faire belle chasse;

Montrez, mes bons chiens,

Montrez, votre race . . .

Franchissez, buissons et halliers."*

"That's right/' laughed the marquis. "Why, you
are as young as you were twenty years ago, and I call
it a downright shame that you should have forsaken
us. We miss you so often that I think it is mere self-
ishness on your part to lock yourself up here in your
charmed castle like an angered fairy. You should
have seen your grandmother, Pierrot, in those days!
There was never a woman to touch her. Always splen-
didly rnounted, and wearing habits that fitted like
gloves, she was the picture of a horsewoman and of a
huntress."

" Fie, my dear friend 1 Curb your enthusiasm I You
are becoming quite lyrical. Pierrot has seen you in

69

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

the saddle and you cannot help confessing quaprSs
vous it faut tirer I'echelle. My sons are superb on horse-
back, especially this little chap's father. But you are
tout-a-fait de I'ancienne ecole; de la vieille roche ! — you
are faultless!"

And thus did the two old " comrades " make me an
excuse for bringing up a host of pleasant memories
which filled my little sporting soul with delight, and
made me more anxious than ever to keep up the tra-
ditions of my race, every member of which had ap-
parently an unconquerable taste for trying to break
his or her neck across country.

Later, just before I finally departed, accompanied by
the faithful Jean, I had the pleasure of hearing the
gallant marquis singing, accompanied by my grand-
mother's tender touch on the ancient spinnet, those
inimitable strophes of De Musset, " La Nuit de Mai/'
which she had set tojnusic herself. And as we drove
rapidly along the moonlit road I warbled with praise-
worthy impartiality mixtures of the " Sortie du Chenil/'
and of —

" Poete, prends ton luth et me donne un baiser;

La fleur de 1'eglantier sent ses bourgeons 6clore.
Le printemps nait ce soir ; les vents vont s'embraser,

Et la bergeronnette, en attendant 1'aurore,
Aux premiers buissons verts commence a se poser.
Poete, prends ton luth et me donne un baiser."

CHAPTER IV

"A 1'horizon court un nuage

Au flanc noir :

Piti6, car nous aurons 1'oragc
Avant ce soir."

IT has always been a subject of painful surprise to me
that Almighty God should ever permit the black wing
of real, deep, despairing sorrow to touch the brow of the
very young. I do not mean in saying this to be ir-
reverent. Far be such a thing from my thoughts!
But the agony of a childish mind is infinitely more ter-
rible to witness than that of the already formed and
tempered being, armed cap-b-pie to fight the battles
of life. The white purity of youth should rightfully
not be disturbed or tarnished by a blast from that de-
stroying furnace which we must all enter sooner or
later. Intense bitterness, intense anguish, intense lone-
liness of soul and of heart, are burdens far too great
to be borne by the soft organism of a child, and when
such a thing comes to pass, alas ! the little spotless spirit
is scarred forever with a mark which nothing can efface.

I speak strongly, for I know what such a wound
means, and I have carried through life the shuddering
remembrance of the hour when it was dealt to me. For
a long time it left me no hope of any kind. Weak and
giddy with horror, I wished a thousand times that I
could die, wished it passionately, ceaselessly; for death
seemed to me the only healing power, the only possible
road out of my misery. The aged, strangely enough,
fear Pallida-Mors, but for the young she has no terrors.

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

and, indeed, often appears in the guise of a kind and
soothing deity.

One morning I awoke to find the big bed alongside of
my own empty. I stared curiously around me, with a
vague impression of calamity. Had I overslept myself?
No, for the broad metal face of the tall Louis XIV. clock,
whereon the early sun's rays shone, told a different tale.
Where could my father be? He never went out before
breakfast without taking me with him, and, as the door
of his dressing-room stood wide open, I felt sure that he
was not taking his usual cold plunge. I sprang quickly
from my cot, little knowing that I was nearing the turn-
ing-point of my existence. I wrapped a bath -robe
around me, pulled on my slippers with violent haste,
and ran out into the upper hall. Everything was quiet
and sunny there. The tapestried walls seemed to open
vistas of green forests around me — forests peopled by
dwarfed hunters and horses, above which hovered doves
twice as large as themselves. This quaint, primitive
art had often made me laugh, for little did I know of the
value of those splendid pieces of work, but I did not feel
much like laughing just then. Rapidly, but noiselessly,
I bounded down-stairs two steps at a time, forgetful of
the fact that my costume was not everything that it
should be. In the Salle des Gardes, I was met by
Monsieur TAbbe", who, catching me in his arms, checked
my rapid flight.

"Go back to your room, Pierrot," whispered he.
" Your father has a headache, and is lying down in his
study ; you must not disturb him."

" Papa a headache ! Nonsense ! " I cried, incredulous-
ly. "Why, papa is never ill. It cannot be true."
Then with a sudden, overwhelming, panic-stricken burst
of fear I relapsed into Gaelic, and, clutching the Abbe' s
arm with all my might, I fairly shrieked :

72

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

"Marw eo! Marw eo!" (He is dead! he is dead!)

"Holy Mother of God, what ails the child? Why,
you silly little thing, it's nothing of the kind 1 He has a
mere headache. Don't be a baby, Pierrot! I never saw
you like this. Goodness gracious, you are as white
as chalk!"

Kindly and gently the blessed old man carried me ur>
stairs, for my trembling legs literally refused all service.
Then I felt ashamed of myself. And yet the agony
of those few moments still remained with me. My ears
were buzzing as if my skull were full of water, and a
myriad of infinitesimal sparks of light, forming them-
selves into dazzling stars, kept passing before my eyes
in the most bewildering fashion.

As I sat in the great chair before the window, gazing
dizzily into the morning mist called forth by the early
sun-rays, and which, like folds on folds of pink gauze,
covered both sea and shore, my heart stood still, and I
choked down a sob that rose in my throat. Then I
drew myself up slowly, and rang the bell to call my
attendants. In the mean time Monsieur 1'Abbe" was
vainly endeavoring to explain matters to me.

"Please say no more! Please don't speak to me!"
I implored, forcing myself to be calm. "As soon as I
have had my bath and am dressed I will ask you to
take me to see papa, for I know that he is very ill."

" My child, it is not so. Do not grieve thus. Pray
believe me. Your dear father is not in any danger.
But why do you wish me to take you to him? Surely,
if he be awake, you need no safe conduct to his pres-
ence."

I shook my head, but did not reply, for I would not
tell my Abb6 that the uppermost wish of my heart was
to avoid one of my mother's adamantine edicts of ban-
ishment.

73

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

My strange presentiment, which at first had seemed
out of all proportion and reason, was nevertheless but
the beginning of a long spell of unutterable misery,
for my father sickened with typhoid fever. All was
done for him that could be done. Our old doctor, a
learned and shrewd man in spite of his rough exterior,
was unremitting in his care, and when the crisis ap-
proached he summoned the greatest and most celebrated
physicians from Paris, who shook their heads, mur-
mured some platitudes about the resources to be found
in a strong and healthy constitution, consulted together
in solemn conclave, and, after duly pocketing their
enormous fees, disappeared from our horizon like ex-
traordinarily brilliant but intensely awful and myste-
rious constellations.

And meanwhile he who was my all lay in the gloom
and silence of his chamber, although outside the air
was mild and fragrant, and Nature looked her best in
her autumnal, splendor of golden furze and bracken,
murmuring seas, and many-hued sunsets. All the
splendor of his life seemed snapped asunder in its prime
and perfection. His great strength was gone from
him. The poor, whom he had helped, and who came
daily clamoring at the gates for news of him, were aban-
doned. Day and night white-capped Sisters of Mercy
watched by him, and both my mother and his own were
with him in turns from early morn till late evening. He
was delirious most of the time, his superb gray eyes,
enlarged and rendered intolerably bright by fever, roam-
ing incessantly about him. Soon it became evident that
he could only be soothed when I — poor little mite —
was near him. He called for me in his delirium, and
the physicians declared that he must have his way.
How proud and happy this made me, in the midst of
a sorrow so great that it aged me at once and carried

74

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

me without transition from childhood to adolescence.
He was never contented except when I knelt at the
side of his bed, or sat quite close to him, and held his
burning hand in both of mine. Yet his mere presence
was sweet to me, with a sweetness which bordered on
anguish.

I did not realize this, of course, because my thoughts
and my feelings were all confused and inarticulate,
but I have done so since, and also the helpless sense of
impotency to save him or even to be of real use which
weighed like lead upon the warmth and usual self-re-
liance of my little soul.

I pause here, seeking words with which to render my
meaning exactly, or to picture the plight I was in.
Hardy, and loving all out-door sports and seafaring
ways as I did, yet this temporary imprisonment in a sick-
room was evoking in my whole being something at the
same time mystical and restive which was utterly unlike
my customary pluck — something, in fact, which, wher-
ever it is found, presages woe. My relations with my
mother, thanks to my grandmother's almost constant
presence, were less strained than they had been since
my brother's advent into the world, but nevertheless
we made but poor progress — she and I — when left alone
together par hazard. I disappointed her perhaps as
much as she chilled me, although I attempted some-
times to please her by little attentions, taking the form
of a few flowers gathered during the daily walks which,
much to my distress, I was made to take with Monsieur
TAbbe", and which were brought to her diffidently by
me ; of a cushion placed behind her back or a footstool
drawn forward to rest her slim and always beautifully
shod feet upon. But unfortunately we do nothing well
that we do half-heartedly, and in spite of my excellent
intentions there must have been something forced in

75

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

these small advances of mine, and she either detected
this, or else disliked the whole proceedings, for I always
felt mean afterwards, and just as if I had made myself
unbearably ridiculous.

My mother's anxiety and concern during my father's
illness were genuine and sincere, and yet they did not
soften her in the least. An enfant gdtee always, one
who all her life had had everything her own way, she
maintained a serene immunity from all disagreeable
obligations, only breaking through her selfish habits
when it suited her to do so, and then by singular fits
and starts. She was like a self-indulged child who
occasionally gives way to a generous impulse on the
spur of the moment, and then feels inclined to yell its
lungs out from sheer impotent regret at having done so.

She herself had a sante de fer in spite of her fragile
appearance, but she dearly loved to act as if she were
doomed to die soon. Yet she had no real sympathy for
physical ailments — in others. Like all perfect come-
dians, she knew the difficult art d'entrer dans la peau
du bonhomme, which, in French theatrical jargon, means
identifying one's self wholly with one's part. I found
out much later that she persuaded herself at times that
she was really in a distinctly perilous state of health.
This is a useful gift to possess when one likes to rule
one's entourage with a sufficiently effective rod.

At last the terrible strain caused by my father's criti-
cal condition began to relax, for his medical men pro-
nounced it to be their opinion that the patient was on
the mend. The crisis was past, they said, and within
a comparatively short time he would be entirely out of
danger. The reaction was something indescribable
to me, for I passed suddenly from the depths of despair,
with all the elasticity of youth, to boundless joy and
hope.

76

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

It never occurred to me, for a minute, that the en-
couraging words of the doctors could be doubted, and
even when my father recovered consciousness, and
when the extraordinary weakness left by the departing
fever made him look absolutely corpse-like, as he lay
for hours together motionless and silent on his bed,
my ecstasy remained unchecked, and I felt as if I could
have continually shouted for sheer joy, so profound
was my bliss at this unexpected convalescence.

Very slow, however, was the progress made by him,
and it was only after many weeks that I once more had
the intense gratification of driving out with him, ac-
companied by the young intern from a Parisian hospital
who had, during his entire illness, remained in charge
of him at the castle.

At last a day came when the imposing Parisian
specialists swooped down once more upon us and decreed
that only a season at Vichy wrould complete this mar-
vellous cure, which they ascribed, of course, to their own
profound science and unerring ability. For once my
mother completely overruled my father's desires. She
would not hear of my being one of the party, which
left Brittany for the famous bathing-place without me,
and she gained her point. With a sorely grieving heart,
but by no means unhopeful of the future, I said what I
believed a temporary good-bye to the father whom I
was never to see again alive. It was our first long
separation, and I took it very hard. Thanks to the
absence of my imperious mother, however, I had things
pretty well my own way at home. My aunt had been
left in charge of the household, and she relaxed her
surveillance to such an extent, her tastes being above all
musical, and engrossing all her time, that, with the ex-
ception of my school-room duties, I was free to ride,
drive, or roam about after my own sweet will. This

77

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

I did, sometimes with my Abbe, sometimes with Jinks,
but usually by myself within the boundary walls of
the immense park. When I say that the drive from
the park gates up to the castle was six miles long, it
will explain how it was that I did not feel very much
like a prisoner. Even my bed-time hour had been left
more or less open to question. Old Gaud, for some
unexplained reason, hated to thwart me at that time,
and her oft-repeated " poor little dear " and " poor little
child" would have made me uneasy had I not been
too young to realize that there must be some good cause
for her veiled sympathy and pity.

One sultry night, that I shall remember all my life, I
was kept awake for several hours by the exasperating
sound of a vilely played violin rising from the open
windows of the music-room directly beneath my own.
My aunt had discovered that one of our young neighbors
was what she called "a very promising musician/' and
had therefore undertaken the task of making him re-
hearse some old scores which she thought his talent
was especially fitted for. My recollections of this much-
vaunted genius are dreadful. Many years later I heard
one of those jingling, mournful tunes he used to play
on his cheap fiddle executed by the master hand of the
great Sarasate himself, and I fled from the imperial
concert-room where it was being so superbly rendered,
for the sad memories the tune brought back to me made
me faint, and so absolutely wretched that I was forced
to seek solitude and fresh air, in order to avoid making
a spectacle of myself.

My nerves were pretty well shaken up, too, on that
hot night in Brittany, for three days before a curious
thing had come to pass, one which the superstitious
Bretons of my entourage had shaken their heads over
in gloomy foreboding, though nobody ventured to utter

78

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

aloud the dread which had filled every soul on the sub-
ject. Shortly before midnight on that occasion a loud
crash came from my father's apartments and aroused
the household. On entering the empty rooms it was
found that not only had his heavy cavalry sword become
detached from its fastenings above his desk, but that a
large mirror, let into the opposite wall, at least thirty-
five feet away, was split from end to end. I could not
help giving considerable importance to this incident,
even though it was carefully explained to me that the
fracture was caused by atmospheric conditions — a
ludicrous elucidation of the mystery that I was fortu-
nately too young to scorn. What with the uncanny
impression created upon me, however, by this accident,
and the torturing music from below, I tossed and tum-
bled on my little cot, and finally climbed into the bed
where I had been used to see my father, and to be greeted
by his cheery " good-morning/'

A flood of bright moonlight filled the lofty room,
where every object was clearly distinguishable.
Through the open windows a gentle murmur of the
waves, and a strong perfume of reseda and heliotrope,
mixed with the pungent smell of sea- weed and wet rocks,
poured freely in. After a long time the music ceased,
and I dropped into a sort of restless doze through which
I heard, or seemed to hear, many strange noises, includ-
ing the sound of hurrying footsteps. I was so tired,
however, that I did not thoroughly awaken until I be-
came instinctively conscious that somebody was look-
ing at me. With a violent start I sat up. There, at
the foot of the great bed across which I lay, stood a figure
draped in lugubrious cr£pe veils. It took me some
moments to recognize my mother, for I had never seen
her otherwise than marvellously gowned in light and
brilliant colors. Her presence seemed to me so awful

79

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

at that moment, and so unexpected, that I could scarce-
ly repress a shriek of terror, and it was only after a
twice repeated struggle for speech that I at last gasped
out:

" Is that you, mother? What is the matter?"

Without a gesture, without a single motion of her
lithe body, she said, in a monotonous voice :

"Your father is dead!"

I have a vague remembrance of uttering one wild,
piercing cry, and then heaven and earth seemed to pass
away from me.

Try as I may, I cannot bring myself to describe the
days, the weeks — almost the years that followed. Such
a process would entail probing too deeply into a wound
that has never healed completely as yet, although the
scars of many others now add their pain to it.

Everything seemed to have to come to an end, so
far as I was concerned. I saw the world through a
black curtain, the thick folds of which allowed no ray
of hope to brighten my unhappy lot. At first I resolved
to let myself perish with hunger, and refused to take
any food, so that I might at once rejoin my dead father.
There is little doubt that I would have succeeded —
for I have always been singularly stubborn and firm
of purpose — had it not been for a young friend of my
father's, a captain Comte d'A., who, pitying my de-
spair, took the law into his own hands, and, by dint of
clever coaxing, of pointing out to me what he whom I
had lost would have wished me to do, led me back to
something like reason. For, thanks, in a great meas-
ure, to the way in which this crushing blow had
been dealt me, I certainly was partially insane for a
time.

So

Petit Pierrot, in those gray eyes,

That gaze in such defiant wise
Upon a hostile world, nor show
A tremor in their steady glow —

What a rebellious mischief lies!

Innocence, pluck that never dies,
Hatred of wrong in every guise,

Gleam there — how merry they can grow!
Petit Pierrot!

But, ah! how many t'would surprise,
If they could even half surmise,

The tenderness that lies below

That bright, brave look, and faintly know,
The depths of love that you comprise,
Petit P'errot!

F. J. H. S.

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

The care and truly unequalled devotion displayed by
the young cavalry officer towards a broken-hearted child
will always remain with me as one of the redeeming feat-
ures of the human race. Such exceptions are rare — at
least I have found them to be so. But when they are met
with they leave an indelible mark upon one's life, and
change one's whole views about this poor world of ours.
Perchance, however, it was a bad service which Charles
d'A. rendered me; for if he had not saved me from
myself, I would have long ago been at rest. It chanced
that at that very time my little brother was attacked
by some infantile ailment, and the whole establishment
was in an uproar lest it should become serious. My
mother sat up day and night with untiring self-forget-
fulness, my kind Abbe* had gone to attend a dying
brother, and during that period, excepting for my one
friend in need, I was alone. Old Gaud, too, completely
shattered by the death of her beloved nursling — my
Father — was so ill that grave doubts were entertained
as to her recovery.

The captain and I wandered about, speaking seldom,
but in thorough communion of thought and feeling.
For he, too, had loved my father devotedly, and owed
much to the superior officer who had constantly be-
friended him when he first entered the army. He was
paying his debt of gratitude now, capital and tenfold
interest, by what he did for his erstwhile chief's forlorn
little child.

Ten years later, in the midst of a brilliant court re-
ception, I was told suddenly that Comte d'A. had been
killed during a skirmish with the Touaregs in far-off
Africa. Special mention was made of him by the
French ambassador, who was my informant, and also
of the magnificent bravery with which he had sacri-
ficed his life to save those of many others.
F 81

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

"Oh, God, this is Thy justice and his reward!" I
muttered, unconsciously, while the old diplomat went
on talking about the hero whose butchered body was
being brought back to France, wrapped in the folds of
the tricolor. My thoughts were echoed by His Excel-
lency's words : "A fine death! The finest of all ! Celle
d'un soldat pour sa patrie. C'etait un brave ! "

" Oh yes ! Brave and gentle ! Loyal and true to the
end!" I mused, and turned away blinded by tears,
sickened with the gay scene surrounding me. I could
not stay there, and so went to my own apartments,
where I could at least mourn him in peace. How I
realized then —

" Le prix d'un cceur qui nous comprend,
Le bien qu'on trouve a le connaitre,
Et ce qu'on souffre en le perdant."

CHAPTER V

" S'il est & vous, votre Rhin allemand,

Lavez«y done votre livr£e;
Mais parlez-en moins fierement. '

Combien, au jour de la curSe,
£tiez-vous de corbeaux centre 1'aigle expirant?"

I HAVE now come to the turning-point of my exist-
ence— an experience fraught with such amazement
and chagrin that at the time it seemed to be the great-
est possible humiliation, though I see now, as I look
back after many years upon this amazing surprise,
that it had a certain humorous aspect in spite of its bit-
terness. My father had now left us since several weeks,
and I was still staggering under the blow that had fallen
upon me with such unparalleled brutality when one
morning my mother summoned me to her august pres-
ence. She was sitting — probably in order to add to the
solemnity of the occasion — in my father's study, a room
so sacred to me now that it seemed like desecration to
see her occupying it. She had grown very thin and
ethereal-looking of late, and as I glanced at her hands,
stripped of all their great, glittering rings, I was struck
by the transparency of her fingers. Her widow's weeds
did not suit her at all, and they hardened her appear-
ance. With a weary gesture she motioned me to take
a seat opposite her, and in the same monotonous in-
tonation which she had not shaken off since her hus-
band's death, she said :

" I have sent for you because the time has come when
you should be made aware of the true state of affairs,

83

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

as far as you are concerned." She paused as if seeking
for words, and I gazed helplessly at her, wondering
what new calamity was about to overtake me. Was
she going to send me to the convent, as she had often
threatened to do whenever I had been particularly
difficult to manage in the past? Leave Brittany? I
never could do that! For there every nook and corner
was pregnant with memories which were my only con-
solation now, and I resolved on the spur of the moment
to shake myself together and make a stand against
any such arbitrary measure, if she so much as hinted
at it. Those few moments of suspense were simply
terrible! and I felt little beads of perspiration start on
my forehead as I awaited sentence.

" It was your father's desire that you should not be told
what I am about to disclose to you until you reached
your tenth anniversary, but circumstances have altered
that, and I judge it to be my duty to tell you that
you are not what you believe yourself to be, a boy, but
merely a little girl."

That was funny ! So funny, indeed, that, in spite of
my sadness and lack of spirits, I burst into a strident,
nervous laugh, thinking & part moi that my poor moth-
er had become suddenly insane with grief, if she were
not of a truth joking, which seemed possible, so ridicu-
lous was her assertion. Very much shocked, she struck
the top of the desk with her closed hand and exclaimed,
angrily :

"Do you think that I am not serious? Or does your
habitual heartlessness lead you to consider such an
important question a laughing matter? and at such a
moment, too! Now don't interrupt me, and I will tell
you how, when you were born, your father's disappoint-
ment at your not being a son was so profound that he
insisted on having you brought up as if you had been

84

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

of the right sex. I tried my best to dissuade him from
so doing, but my entreaties were vain. Even when your
brother was born I was not allowed to tell you that you
were occupying the position which rightfully belonged
to him, probably because it might hurt your feelings/'

A wild rage had been gradually stealing over me,
and when my mother concluded this strange revelation
I was absolutely beside myself with passion. My face
must have revea'ed as much, for a restraining touch
was put on my shoulder, and, in stern, low tones, my
mother said, grimly :

"None of your mad pranks, if you please! Truth is
truth, and it had to be told sooner or later. If I had had
my way, it would have been sooner. You will be good
enough in the future to adopt not only the garments, but
also the manners, of the sex to which you belong. More-
over, should I by any chance hear or find out that you
have failed to obey my orders, I will send you immedi-
ately to a convent, and you shall not leave it again
until your marriage, which I intend to take place as
soon as possible/'

Her grasp relaxed, and without a word I rushed out of
the room, down the stairs to the other end of the house,
where my Abbe* was comfortably ensconced in his private
sitting-room, reading The Lives of the Saints, or some
other such meritorious work not at any rate in keeping
with the abrupt appearance of a youthful demon like
myself.

The outward calm which I had managed to preserve
while in my mother's presence now gave way, and
for the first time in my life I was seized with violent hys-
terics. It was only later on, when the combined efforts
of Gaud and Monsieur 1'Abbe" brought something like
comparative peace to my mind, that I at last began
to grasp and understand my mother's attitude towards

85

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

me since BertrancTs advent, and the resentment with
which she looked upon the innocent interloper that
I was. It took me longer to become even ever so slight-
ly accustomed to my new estate, and I can describe
my feelings during the following months as nothing
short of a long-continued torture, which began when I
woke up in the morning and was only terminated by
sleep.

The long and short of it was that I felt ashamed and
miserable beyond compare. All my dreams of heroic
deeds in the future — of gay and reckless soldiering,
of dashing sports, as well as many, many other hopes
and ambitions — had been destroyed at one fell stroke.
When I looked upon my puny little self in the severe
mourning frocks which were so incongruous, when
coupled with my short locks and boyish manner, I wept
often savagely with disgust and fierce disappointment.
Was ever child placed in such a predicament ? I believe
not; for a singularly manly spirit had been fostered in
me by my father, and my unfortunate lack of affection
for my mother had engendered in me so great a dislike
for everything feminine that this sorry combination has
to this day left its stamp upon my whole individuality
and character. I am of an abnormally sensitive turn
of mind. The idea of ridicule has always been ex-
quisitely painful to me, and it was that perhaps which
hurt me most, because I felt myself both ridiculous
and in a way debased. The only title I could claim now
was that of a regular torn-boy, for so intensely anxious
was I not to show my humiliation and decheance that
I purposely — perhaps instinctively — avoided all ele-
gance of dress or grace of behavior, and when my at-
tendants tried to embellish my pale, washed-out little
self with ribbons or trinkets I tore them off and stamped
upon them ferociously. I need not mention that these

86

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

misdeeds were scrupulously concealed from my mother,
for it was well known by those who surrounded me
that I need expect no mercy at her hands if she ever
found them out or knew of the long hours of rebellion
which I frequently gave way to.

My fits of rage were truly awful. Cruel tears would
rise to my eyes, but they were not called forth by sorrow
alone, and the fire of anger scorched them as they rose.
I stamped my foot passionately, set my teeth as a terrier
does when snarling, and in one word made a regular
little beast of myself, lying flat on the ground and
writhing there in agony, like some animal hurt to death.

I resumed most of my habits, however, concerning
outdoor life and sports, for our old doctor declared to
my mother that any attempt at cooping me up would re-
sult in a serious breaking-down of my health. I was there-
fore allowed, Heaven be praised, to ride, drive, and romp,
as much as I pleased, and, as my dear Abbe" still contin-
ued to superintend my education, I gradually became,
if not reconciled, at least a little more accustomed to
the radical changes which had taken place around me.

Soon, moreover, grave cares of another nature befell,
not alone myself, but all the inmates of the castle, as
well as the entire population of France, for the most
Homeric war which has been fought in modern times
was about to be begotten by the foolish ambition of a
woman and the weakness of a man, who, broken by ill-
ness and disappointments without number, did not
any longer possess even that brilliant audacity which
had made it possible for him to ascend the throne of
France. Every one knows how that culpable and
imbecile war originated with the paltry excuse of a
(ici-man prince's candidature to the 'throne of Spain,
and ended in the most cruel and pathetic of disasters.

I well remember that during that fateful summer of

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

1870 our peasantry asserted that they had received
from Heaven a sign of what was to come. We were
called out from our little beds to witness this extraor-
dinary manifestation, which took the form of a ruby-
red aurora-borealis, filling with its scintillating waves
the entire vault of the midnight sky. Wrapped up
in cloaks, and held by our attendants on the great bal-
cony which overhung the sea, we watched this surpass-
ingly beautiful but also strangely awful spectacle.
Little as he was, and unable to realize what he saw, Ber-
trand cried out with fear, and had to be swiftly borne
away, while my mother coolly remarked that it was
good for children to observe the phenomena of nature,
whether they liked it or not.

At the outset of the campaign no one in the length
and breadth of Brittany dreamed for an instant of the
possibility of defeat. " Ce que nous allons leur en ficher
une raclee!" was heard on all sides, and the belief that
our ever - victorious army could be vanquished never
even so much as entered into any one's calculations.

The Franco-Prussian conflict has been described
so ably by great writers that it is not for my paltry pen
to attempt anything of the kind. So I will content my-
self with weaving some of its incidents into the warp of
my own history, just as I remember them, and without
any desire whatsoever to follow in the footsteps of the
official or non-official chroniclers of that period.

It is almost useless to say that all eyes were turned
towards the Rhine, and that the general impression
w^as that the abhorred Prussians would be reconducted
by our proud and powerful armies to their own boun-
dary-lines at once. The idea that these dark-uniformed,
machine-made, beer-drinking cohorts could ever invade
our territory, conquer our cities, and crush our spirit
was too ridiculous to be considered. Our soldiers had

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

been victorious at Castiglione, at Marengo, at Wagram,
at Austerlitz, at Eylau, at I6na, at Friedland, Liitzen,
Smolensk, La Moskowa, in Spain, in Africa — every-
where, in fact. Prussia, Austria, Russia, England —
all had been forced to bend to our might sooner or later.
Why, then, should we be defeated now? Preposterous!
The old men who had fought with the First Napoleon
grunted beneath their white mustaches, and, rubbing
their palsied hands together, declared that ces sales
Prussiens would regret forever and aye the day when
they once again attempted to pit their negligible
strength against our all-conquering power. With hur-
rahs and cries of triumph our soldiers departed, fancy-
ing themselves already covered with imaginary laurels,
and waving above their heads the glorious old flags
glittering with the names of the countless victories
won in the present and the past by us.

The news of MacMahon's disaster at Froschweiler,
of Frossard's at Spickeren, was at first not only disbe-
lieved wholly, but also ridiculed. MacMahon beaten!
That could not be! Nobody seemed to take into con-
sideration that his small corps had of a truth accom-
plished prodigies of valor, but had been, alas! over-
whelmed by the brute force of an entire army. But
when the Bretons finally comprehended and assimilated
the fact that despised Prussia had scored, there was
such an explosion of hatred against the victors and
against the " Francs " — as the rest of the French popula-
tion is designated by all true Bretons — those Francs
who had allowed themselves to be thrashed and routed —
that no pen can portray the state of frenzy into which
the whole country-side was thrown. Execrations with-
out number were launched at the heads of " incompetent
chiefs/' and every man, woman, and child swore that
the shame must be avenged, and this indignity which

89

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

had been put upon the grandest people in the world
be washed away in oceans of blood before the children
of France could again draw an honest breath.

When the Prussians crossed the Rhine, when at last
it dawned upon the simple-hearted peasants and fisher-
folks that the entire nation was hurrying towards total
ruin, a sort of prostrated stupor replaced the rage of
the first days, and Napoleon III., as well as his consort,
became the scapegoats upon whom torrents of bitterest
and rancorous abuse were poured.

The Breton is essentially monarchical in his beliefs,
and the reign of the Third Napoleon never was kindly
looked upon by them. Indeed, at the time of his mar-
riage to Mile, de Montijo, there was a universal outcry
against so great a forfeiture, and when upon several
occasions the sovereign put his foot on Breton soil his
reception was of the coldest not to say of the most re-
pellent nature. The stanch and faithful heart of this
ancient people was centred on the King — Le Roy —
as they designated Henri V. , Comte de Chambord, the
hermit of Froshdorff — the last of a long line of glorious
monarchs.

Napoleon, the usurper, the perjurer, the adventurer,
who, according to many, was not even distantly related
to that greatest of modern generals, Napoleon I., filled
them with disgust and with a feeling of distrust which
nothing could appease. And if, during the eighteen
years of his successful reign, he was an object of such
dislike, it can readily be imagined what sentiments he
inspired when he lost his crown, ruined his country,
and surrendered his tarnished and useless sword to
the King of Prussia, and was despatched with some of
his innumerable fourgons and tinsel-coated retinue to
the castle of Wilhelmshohe, a disgraced and dishonored
prisoner of war.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Bah! even now it makes me shudder to recall the
sensation of positive nausea which overwhelmed my
little childish being when I was told that the army in
which my father had served, and his ancestors before
him, had sustained a reverse so grim and so final that
no effort — be it ever so magnificent — that no bravery —
be it ever so complete — could ever quite efface the stain
which darkened its 'scutcheon.

I will remember to my dying day that tragic winter —
so cold, so severe — when even in our balmy seclusion,
where roses, myrtles, and violets usually blossom from
November to November, we felt the grip of frost and the
bite of searching, snow -laden winds; while dun-hued
fogs enshrouded the bay, and seemed to drop like a veil
of mourning over both land and sea. How pitiful, how
pathetic the long evenings were now! They began
at five in the afternoon, and we sat huddled around
blazing fires, with saddened countenances and sorrow-
ful hearts. Descriptions of bloody battles were read
aloud to us by the Abbe", who could scarcely repress
his indignation and emotion. Had it not been for my
sake, indeed, he would have joined the army as a chap-
lain long before that. My uncles, my cousins, all our
masculine relatives and friends, were serving their coun-
try, and more than once their names appeared upon the
list of those morts au champ d'honneur.

After, the incredible number of wounded which lit-
tered the gore -soaked soil of poor old France, and
for whose accommodation the public and private field-
hospitals hastily established everywhere were inade-
quate, were transported to the four corners of our
dismantled country, and we too, thank God, received
our share of this eagerly sought burden. The " Oran-
gerie," the picture-gallery, and many a lofty salon
and reception-room, were transformed into ambulances

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

militaires, where rows of little white beds held wounded
heroes, bruised, and battered, and maimed during the
turmoil of battle. My mother, assisted by my grand-
mother, my aunts, and the numerous members of our
household, nursed these fallen soldiers by day and by
night with faithful devotion. There I served my ap-
prenticeship as a nurse, and what little knowledge I
may have then gathered of that most glorious of all
sciences — namely, the relief of human suffering — has
stood me in good stead later on. From the first I felt
that I was in my element. Soft-footed and noiseless
as a mouse, I crept between those dolorous couches with-
out any feeling of repulsion at the horrors I daily wit-
nessed. As a precautionary measure against con-
tagion from the fever cases, I was clad in white linen,
like a diminutive Sister of Mercy, and my hair, which,
much to my despair, was beginning to grow long, was
completely tucked away under a prim little cap shaped
very much like that of a nun. This won for me the
surname of la Petite Religieuse, though I trust and
sincerely hope that the sacred habit of a real religious
never served as a blind to conceal so hot-headed, unruly
a creature as I was then.

My ever turbulent and untamed nature absolutely
writhed under the fearful humiliations suffered by my
country. Extremely precocious, thanks to the awful
events through which I had passed in rapid succession
during the last months, I felt the shame of it all with as
much acuteness as any grown-up person might have
done — nay, as had I myself been a disarmed and dis-
graced soldier, and, in my fits of impotent fury, I went
so far sometimes as to thank Almighty God for having
recalled to him my dear father before this heart-breaking
and supreme experience of boundless patriotic distress be-
came his. Yet my faith in him was ever so great that I

92

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

could not help feeling that had he lived matters would
have been different. How he would have fought!
Surely he would have known how to meet the supreme
difficulties of such a situation. I used to picture him to
myself rallying about him the demoralized troops, cheer-
ing and encouraging them by his own noble example,
and Hying with them at the very throat of the dismayed
enemy.

The rendition of Sedan, that of Metz, the alleged
treason of Marshal Bazaine, the siege of Paris, and
that horror of horrors, the Commune ; when drunk with
blood and shame brother devoured brother, and French-
man killed Frenchman, amid a blaze of murderous
flames and the crash of historical monuments, followed
upon each other like the varying and ever-growing ter-
rors of a nightmare, leaving us palpitating with anguish
and almost cursing the day when we were born.

Our villages were peopled now only by weeping, wail-
ing, sable-clad women, who all had lost either a husband,
a son, a father, or a brother. The crushing debt of five
milliards owing to the Germans before they consented
to evacuate our territory, was but yet another martyr-
dom inflicted upon us, and yet this amazing sum of
money was paid, paid to the last sou, by a people fallen,
it is true, from their once so high estate, but yet in a
measure rehabilitated by their absolute surrender of
all that which they could surrender, in order to liberate
France.

The nobles and country magnates crippled themselves,
sadly drawing to the uttermost limit upon their ex-
chequers ; the peasants mortgaged their fields and sold
their harvests before they ripened; while the highest
ladies of the land pawned their jewels and gave up all
display of luxury, regretting only that they could do
so little when they saw the humble peasant girls and

93

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

the poor fishermen's wives cutting theii luxuriant
tresses as if they had suddenly been stricken by the
plague, in order to add what little gold they thus ob-
tained to the glittering treasures which the relentless
Prussians so greedily demanded. So absolute and
general was this feeling of utter devotion to a beloved
country in its dire hour of need, so naturally did it come
to us, that it was without a murmur that I saw the
racing-stud which my father had so loved pass into the
hands of English dealers, and his yacht, the beautiful,
exquisitely graceful Ichtis, sold to a wealthy Spaniard,
who looked to me as if he were made of chocolate, with
his round, lustreless eyes, his swarthy skin, and his
brown, curly beard — which as much as anything else
made me detest him.

"C'est pour la patrie, mon petit Enfant" whispered
my grandmother, when she noticed that my eyes were
brimful of tears, and that my chest was heaving with
a sorrow almost too profound to be kept under restraint.

"Pour la patrie" — that explained and made every-
thing possible at that moment. Every drop of our blood
would we willingly have shed to efface the pity of it all,
and to have known that France could once again hold
up her head as in the proud and cloudless years when
she had been Reine et Maitresse.

Seven years later I reassumed temporarily the role of
military nurse at the opposite extremity of Europe, and
went through many days of terrible strain and fatigue
in ambulance tents, where fresh blood was flowing and
where the stricken men which we tended were carried
from the battle-field still throbbing with life and en-
thusiasm under their torn, powder-smeared uniforms.
What a different spectacle was that of the Castle " In-
firmer ie," permeated by the fever of old wounds, filled
with the moaning of delirious patients, who often wept

94

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

like little children in helpless despair at their own weak-
ness and uselessness while the enemy yet remained
u M repulsed and defiled our fairest provinces. Ex-
hausted, almost collapsed, looking more like skeletons
than like human beings, with their white, cadaverous
visages and their sleepless eyes, they made up a picture
of nerve-shaking misery in spite of the care with which
they were surrounded, the freshly gathered flowers
placed each day at their bed-heads, the snowy linen of
their sheets and pillows, and the roaring, merry fires,
kept up continuously, not only to warm but to purify the
air which they breathed.

We were very proud of our different wards, especially
of the one which had been organized in the " Orangerie."
The great big golden -fruited, white -blossomed trees,
rising from huge square majolica tubs, sufficed in them-
selves to adorn the place and make it cheery and at-
tractive to our patients. There were very few blossoms
on these trees, so few, indeed, that their perfume could
in no wise interfere with the salubrity of the place ; there-
fore, much to my joy, they were not ordered to be re-
moved by the attending physicians.

Before l'ann$e terrible I had never seen death, and
all painful spectacles had been spared me, so that my
first experience in this respect was a deep and lasting
shock. Fortunately the first time that I saw a spirit
pass away in that luxurious little hospital of ours, it
happened to be under the most favorable circumstances
—if one may so express one's self — for it was that of a
young and remarkably handsome soldier who died
without a murmur, just as had he fallen asleep, and
whose beautifully chiselled features immediately as-
sumed that unutterable look of peace and supernatural
content which is sometimes met with on the countenances
of those who leave this sad world of ours before they have

95

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

had the occasion to empty to the dregs the bitterness of
its cup. Indeed, ever since that day death appeared to me
in the guise of an all-powerful soother, and of a friend,
much more than in that of an enemy. It served to make
me realize also that when my Abbe told me that my father
was now at rest and happier than he could ever have been
on earth, the worthy old man was speaking the truth.
There was consolation in that thought, although it was
tinged always with the regret that for once that dear
father of mine had been selfish in not allowing me to
share that grand, enviable peace, and had left me be-
hind, unloved and misunderstood by those whose duty
it should, it seemed to me, have been to cherish me all
the more, since I had lost my all.

Such beings as was my father leave after them an
eternal remembrance and an ineffaceable impress upon
the existence of those who have loved them. Up to this
day, during a career of much variation of feeling and of
country, it has only been my fortune to meet with three
creatures who seemed to have been made by Almighty
God with a special care and for a special purpose, whose
qualities so far outnumbered their failings that the
latter entirely disappeared and gave merely the impres-
sion of those dainty transparent shadows which one
observes in Corot's finest pictures, a mere veil over yet
more beauty. Two of these §tres d'election have
gone before : one was my father, the other my Em-
press. About the third I will be silent, excepting for the
fact of venturing to hope that during the many years
which, please God, will be his upon earth, he will realize
what boundless power a truly pure, earnest, and cour-
ageous spirit can wield over our ever-struggling, sin-
ning, and suffering humanity.

" J'ai vu sous le soleil tomber bien d'autres choses
Que les feuilles des bois et 1'ecume des eaux,
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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Bien d'autres s'en aller que le parfum des roses
Et le chant des oiseaux!

"Mes yeux ont contempt des objets plus funebres

Que Juliette morte au fond de son torn beau,
Plus affreux que le toast a 1'ange des t6nebres.
Port6 par Romeo.

" La foudre maintenant peut tomber sur ma t6tc

Jamais ce souvenir ne peut m'etre arrachg;
Comme le matelot bris6 par la tempete.
Je m'y tiens attach^."

CHAPTER VI

* I am sick of the hall and the hill, I am sick of the moor and the

main!

Why should I stay? can a sweeter chance ever come to me here?
Oh, having the nerves of motion, as well as the nerves of pain,
Were it not wise if I fled from the place and the pit, and the fear?"

THIS Franco-Prussian campaign, upon which I have
lightly touched in the preceding chapter, was in a meas-
ure a welcome truce in my strained relations towards my
mother. Every mind was so taken up during that time
with the woes of France that personal matters dwindled
into nothingness; but, alas! as soon as our existence
.regained its ordinary placid course, like a torrent tem-
porarily imprisoned by ice and suddenly freed from all
restraint, the sad strife, so unfilial, in spite of the fact
that it was concealed by great outward marks of respect
on my side, and by apparent parental solicitude on hers,
broke out with renewed vigor.

" C'est fini, nous ne nous comprendrons jamaisl" I
often mused. And although at that time if my mother
had softened towards me in the slightest degree I would
have eagerly responded to her advances, her con-
stant severity, her perpetual nagging — a very trite
word, but there is no better to describe her ceaseless
fault-finding whenever I was in her presence — repelled
me more and more, and drove me often to positive des-
peration.

It is but seemly that I should here confess the fact —
if it be of any interest — that I was endued with an ex-
traordinarily exasperating turn of mind myself, and

98

NO LONGER PIERROT, BUT MARGUERITE !

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

that the tact and patience required to tame such a nature
as mine is hardly ever to be found on this earth, and can
only be replaced by a deep and all-conquering love.
When such qualities are united, as they were in my
lather, the result is strangely perfect, but otherwise a
situation of this sort is liable to increase in difficulty as
time goes on.

The very thought that I was now expected to behave
like a little girl, decorously and in a perfectly maid-
enly fashion, was more than sufficient to goad me on to
the most execrable displays of boyish daring. How
I escaped with my life is really amazing, for I was never
so entirely happy as when climbing the most dangerous
portions of the cliffs, going out alone in stormy weather
in rny cockle - shell of a sailing - boat — which, I must
say, I managed quite ably — or riding barebacked those
of the horses that had not been thoroughly exercised,
and consequently most resented my attempts at curb-
ing their will.

Once a rather typical incident occurred, under the
following circumstances: Shortly before his death,
my father had given me a very pretty jardiniere of
Roman pottery, containing a beautiful double ca-
mellia, the faintly pink, velvety blossoms of which
were a delight to me. This jardiniere stood on the
broad ledge of my bedroom window, and I treasured it
almost above all other things in my possession. One
morning the woman who was in charge of the sweeping
in my part of the castle unfortunately knocked it down
with her broom-handle, smashing both pot and plant
into pieces on the tessellated floor. I happened upon
the scene at that very moment, and so great was my
rage that, although I was invariably polite, nay, even
affectionate, to all those faithful old servants of ours, I
flew at the culprit, whose name was La Cognate,

99

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

and, shaking her violently, showered upon her a vol-
ley of epithets the only merit of which was their ex-
treme expressiveness and pointed application. Ter-
ror-stricken, the poor little peasant-woman entreated
me to forgive her, but I raved on with such passion that
she might as well have been talking to the wall for all
the effect which she produced. In the midst of this
pleasant little colloquy my mother entered the room,
and stood for a few seconds literally rooted to the spot
in the extremity of her surprise.

As she declared afterwards, she could not believe her
eyes when she saw a child of hers demean itself in so
shameless a way, and she instantly demanded that I
should go down on my knees before the weeping Bre-
tonne and crave her pardon. I need not state — for I am
sure by this time that it is useless to explain what man-
ner of a devil frequently raved within me — that I flatly
refused to obey, even when I was given the ultimatum
of complying with my mother's request or of being
locked up in my room on a delectable diet of bread and
water until I "came to my senses. "

Had somebody at that minute been shrewd enough
to point out to me the odium of my conduct and the
injustice thereof, all would have yet1 gone well, but,
instead of that, fuel was added to the flames, when
my mother contemptuously ordered La Cognate to
throw away the remnants of my treasure — bruised
leaves, buds, pottery, and all "rubbish/" she called
them, just as I was snatching them from the ground,
with the idea of preserving them like relics. This was
too much!

I set my teeth, clinched my fists, and remained stonily
obdurate to all objurgations, until at last, after going,
when left to myself, through a period of absolutely dis-
proportionate despair — when compared to the misfort-

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

une to which I had been subjected — I lay panting on
the floor, sobbing pitcously, with a vague intention
rising in my mind of putting an end to everything by
jumping out of the window on to the rocks below.

Slowly and wearily the hours dragged along. I
tried to read and to look at pictures, but I could not fix
my attention, and when at six o'clock my mother her-
self brought me my pittance, and commanded me to
go to bed, I was reduced for the first time in my life to
downright sullenness.

Tired out with weeping, I finally fell asleep, but woke
up when the moon, then at its full, flooded the room with
its bright rays. It was past two o'clock in the morning,
and my misery returned to me with such a rush of in-
dignant feeling that I decided, on the spur of the mo-
ment, to display the contempt which I felt for the treat-
ment I had received. Suiting the action to the thought,
I dressed myself quickly and silently, and, throwing
open the casement of one of my windows, I looked down
the sheer ivy-covered wall which overhung the pleasure-
ground by some sixty feet. The ivy was so ancient
that its trunk was thicker than my arm and as strong
as a steel cable. Hastily I resolved to make good my
escape by means of it. I stuffed the pockets of my
reefer- jacket with the bread brought for my dinner, and
which had remained untouched on the table, then I
proceeded to pack a small haversack with a suit of
boy's clothes and different other things I greatly prized.
When this was done I stole on tip-toe into the room
which had been my father's, and, standing on a long
divan, I detached from the wall a broad-bladed hunt-
ing-knife, which I buckled around my waist.

Strange to say, all these preparations cheered me
wonderfully, my despair and sadness had flown as if
magic, and as I went about them I began to hum
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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

softly to myself some snatches of the "Complainte de
Saumur," which my father had often sung in the dear,
merry days of yore.

" Un jour de cuite

Et de pituite
Tupin, la-haut, etait tout attriste",

Car dans 1'Olympe,

Quand on y grimpe,
On n'trouve pas toujours de la gaitel"

The sound of a creaking wainscoting made me pause,
and I looked about, praying in my heart that no one
should hear me. All was silent again, so silent that I
distinctly perceived the rustling of the night wind in
the great ivy. I jumped from the divan to the floor,
and began to lace my tall gaiter-like boots, resuming
my song as if nothing out of the way was on my mind.
I rattled, in a subdued tone, through the eleven coup-
lets, and when I reached the last —

"Prends mon aumone,

Car je m'abonne,
Et veux agir en vrai sous-officier,

Hippologie !

Viens, ma cheriel
Avec Venus je vais t'etudier!"

At last I was ready to go, but unfortunately the
familiar words of the "Complainte" had once more
changed my mood. I had so often laughed heartily at
this queer ditty, although I did not understand the
sense of it all, that my present desolation and horrible
loneliness contrasted cruelly with the fun and frolic that
had disappeared forever from my life.

The huge room was bathed in moonlight, the toilet-
table, with its glitter of gold and of silver, its large mir-
ror, and the famous blue-velvet Christmas pin-cushion

102

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

(which, rejected by my fastidious mother, had been an-
nexed by my father, who told me subsequently that he
liked it because I had selected it) stood out from the
dark wall as clearly as had it been midday.

Suddenly I caught sight of a life-size portrait of my
father, painted when still in the army, and at that time
a dashing young officer. The soft, silvery effulgence
pouring in through the casements enfolded the superb
work of art in such a way that the tall, soldierly figure,
the handsome face, so perfectly modelled, the long mus-
taches, and especially the glorious eyes, gave me the
impression of absolute reality. Step by step I drew
nearer, gazing passionately and with rapt adoration at
the picture.

Why did he not speak to me? Why was he so im-
movable, so distant?

"Papa/' I murmured, in an awe-struck whisper,
" dear, dear papa, speak to me I C'est Pierrot qui est Id,,
et a qui vous manquez tant I Pierrot, qui vous adore et
qui ne peut pas vivre sans vous I"

But the calm, determined face remained motionless,
the eyes, supernaturally brilliant and large, did not
smile at me, and, with a sob of unutterable anguish
rising in my throat, I fled from the room as if I had
been pursued by furies.

He did not answer me! He was gone forever from
his own little boy, so why should I remain in that place,
which knew him no more? In an instant, however, I
collected my wits, and, securely fastening my knapsack
to my back, after mechanically crossing myself — a sol-
dier cannot pray very long when the trumpet calls — I
clambered over the window-sill, and, clutching the ivy
with fingers and knees, I began my perilous descent. I
never glanced to right or to left, and, skilled in cliff-
climbing, I especially avoided looking downwards, for

103

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

the sight of the void beneath would, I knew, render the
task a more difficult one yet.

It seemed as though I was very close to the dark-
blue sky, where the stars sparkled brightly. One false
move, and then there would be a headlong rush, and
silence forever! Who would care? I thought, excepting
dear little Bertrand, who was yet too little to sorrow
deeply at the loss of his clandestine playfellow, and my
old Abbe, who often said :

" La mort n'est pas une porte qui se ferme, c'est une porte

qui s'ouvre.
La vie pr6sente est 6clairee par la vie future."

Such thoughts travel swiftly at similar moments, and,
while clinging like a swallow to my slender hold upon
the grim old wall, I reflected that he would think me hap-
pier dead than alive, and as to Gaud — well, she was so
near the Great Gates herself she would not mourn for
long. A flight of pigeons, disturbed by the shaking
of the venerable ivy, flew upward with a startling
whirl of silky wings, and circled bewilderingly above
my head, frightened and distressed. My foot slipped ;
a second more and I would have been precipitated from
the yet dizzy height — for I was barely half-way down —
but I recovered myself with the promptitude of a sailor,
or a squirrel, and before I had even realized the great-
ness of the danger I was standing firmly on the turf,
safe and sound, without as much as a scratch or a bruise.

Cautiously I made my way towards the stables; the
two watch-dogs, Romulus and Remus, who prowled
about all night, came bounding towards me over the
grass, but they had scented me, and did not make a
sound. Their joy at this unexpected meeting took
the form of enormous leaps and jumps, then they fol-
lowed me like two gigantic tame lions, until I came to the

104

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

iron railing enclosing the paddock. To enter the main
stable was quite out of the question, for this would have
aroused the men, but in a small, separate building —
an old tower — in fact — Buce"phale, " the pink horse," as
we called him, lived in solitary state. He was im-
mensely large and unusually powerful, cream in color,
with a faint suggestion of strawberry about his coat,
mane, and tail — un cheval & crins laves, as they say
in France. The head was large, heavy, with broad
but tapering ears, moreover he was well ribbed -up,
had fine shoulders and an immense girth and loins.
But he was ungainly to a degree courting ridicule,
and so he remained in durance vile, nearly always out
of sight, except when the under-gardeners needed his
enormous strength to drag their ponderous carts about
or to haul timber or stones. Moreover, Buce"phale's
temper was not an easy or an agreeable one; per-
haps the consciousness of his own homeliness made
him restive; but, be this as it may, certainly he inspired
all who approached him with boundless distrust. I
alone had a sort of sneaking affection for him, and often
brought him carrots and apples in his solitary prison,
climbing into the manger to put myself on easier equal-
ity with him.

Fleet as an antelope, I now ran to the old tower, actu-
ated to speed by a fury of resistless goading. Swiftly
as a swallow darts, I rushed into the dark stable, un-
loosed the horse's halter, climbed upon his broad back,
and in another five minutes, having walked him noise-
lessly over the sward, I was off at full gallop, scattering
shreds of the early morning mist, as I went on my breath-
less way, to right and left. I rode straight through the
park, keeping to the grassy borders of the paths, for fear
of being heard. It was a good thing for me that I had
been tossed upon a horse from my earliest years, for

105

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Buce"phale, going ventre a terre, was not an easy mount
to stick to, but I never swerved, and clung to him
like a monkey. Soon I passed out of the park through
a gap in the most ancient portion of the medieval walls
— a sort of dismantled postern, draping its worn sides
under cascades of luxuriant ivy and honeysuckle —
and swept on to the weird, deserted Landes, heading
towards the left side of the promontory on which the
castle is built. I saw nothing as I dashed onward, ex-
cept that Buce"phale was reeking with smoke and foam,
and that I must speedily check him or else founder him.
The rapidity of my flight was telling on me, too; my
brain, shaken up like a bowlful of porridge, had no
sense; my hands, sore and lacerated, pained me, and
a sound of bells and general confusion was in my ears.
Yet I remembered my object in riding forth, and now
guided my horse to a break in the cliffs, where I knew
that I could reach the rugged shore and hide myself in a
deep, dark cave, vaulted like a cathedral, and which
bore the rather creepy name of "La Grotte du Di-
able."

At the beginning of the abrupt descent of this rocky
crevice I paused and jumped to the ground. The water
looked especially treacherous, and was of that peculiar
opaque green which betokens storms or very high tides,
and the rising wind carried with it a strong, bitter flavor
of brine and sea -weed. For a moment I stood unde-
cided, holding the halter of Buce"phale, who was snort-
ing at my side, and shaking his huge bulk as the cool
breeze struck his steaming sides. The path I had to
descend, ordinarily used by coast-guards, was very steep
and difficult, but I was past heeding such trifling ob-
stacles, and, dragging my exhausted horse behind me,
I began my downward course. The loose stones and
sand preceded us in noisy cataracts as we advanced

106

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

cautiously, and both of us stumbled and recovered our
footing many a time.

How lonely it was on that incline, facing the restless
ocean, which grew more and more menacing 1 The
weather was becoming decidedly bad. A low cloud
smote me with a short-lived torrent of rain-drops, sharp
like needles, and I instinctively rubbed my disengaged
hand across my eyes. The sun was quite hidden now,
and a weird, livid light lent a leaden color to the south-
ern horizon. The sea grew heavier and heavier, foam
like white powder covered every rock, and there was a
raw, hard, unseasonable feeling in the air, while my
friends the mews whirled above my head, screaming
dismally.

At last I reached the beach, and managed to steer
Buce"phale into the cave. Poor old chapl what with
the rain and his own previous drenched condition
he was in a sorry -plight. I led him to the upper end of
the grotto, where the sand was fine and dry, and, stand-
ing on a bowlder, I rubbed him down as best I could
with a piece torn from his stable blanket, which I had
left on him when I abducted him from his tower.

The equine giant looked at me intelligently, and I
thought a little pitifully, as I thus exerted myself on his
behalf, and he completed my work by rolling luxurious-
ly in the dry sand above mentioned.

I was so tired that I, too, lay down at full length and
closed my eyes wearily. A wave splashing me slightly
made me sit up with a start, and I perceived that the tide
had made me a prisoner. An instantaneous certainty
that I was lost came over me, and I gazed helplessly
at the water, which now, like a wall, arose before the
opening of " La Grotte du Diable " and rapidly gained
ground. Scum and little pebbles were hurled in my
face, and Buce"phale whinnied and sought refuge higher

107

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

up, pawing the ground impatiently. The flicker of
noon through clouds was hardly perceptible, and I
could see but dimly, for all around me hung a gray
mist of spray, which the wild winds drove furiously
inward. I sighed and joined the horse, who looked
like an indistinct and shapeless mass, without hardly
any form or color to distinguish it from the brooding
gloom and slaty walls of the cave.

" Mon pauvre vieux, nous sommes fichus tous les
deux," I said, leaning against him and speaking more
emphatically than politely. The old chap grunted and
turned his ungainly head towards the incoming water
with a sniff of contempt.

"Tu n'as pas peur?" I continued, and, as I was be-
ginning to feel pangs of hunger, I took out what lit-
tle food I had brought with me, and shared it with him,
en fr&res.

Little by little, however, my thoughts returned to my
grievances, and my only wish was to lie down quietly
and to die there in solitude. A sob shook me, for there
seemed to be no hope now of ever emerging alive from
that awful trap.

"Am I a coward or an utter brute, or both?" I asked
myself. "I came here to escape; well, my escape will
be for good and all. What of that ?" The idea cheered
me, and I waited in calm indifference for the end. I had
not realized that this would be one of the high' tides of
the year, or else I would not have sought refuge in my
present impregnable fortress — impregnable, except by
the ocean itself. My eyes swept over the remorseless
breakers, and then I suddenly thought of Bertrand.
"How could I leave him?" I cried aloud, wrathfully.
"How could I?"

The hours passed. The violence of the storm and of
the waves abated a little, and still I sat motionless, for I

108

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

had lost almost all consciousness, all memory, save of
that beloved little brother, who would possibly cry bit-
terly when he was told of my death. It seemed to me
that the solitude around me and the dangers with which
I was beset were not more desolate than my own fate.
X i imbed and stupefied, wet, cold, and faint, I asked my-
self why I had run away, and what good I had hoped to
achieve by this mad freak. I patted from time to time
the big horse, who stood patiently waiting by me, turn-
ing his docile eyes with a wondering sadness towards the
narrow outlet across which the setting sun was now cast-
ing a blinding glow through a rift in the purple clouds.

After a while I noticed that the tide was receding, and
little by little it dawned on me that we were saved. Reel-
ing slightly, I rose and stretched myself, and watched
the ruddy rays fade, the sky turn to a sickly blue, the
water noiselessly drain itself out of my cave, and at last
the stars peep forth far, oh, so far above me; and then it
was that I heard a faint echo of shouting human voices.
Ah, yes! a searching-party, I thought. I would see
Bertrand again, after alll But the odd stupor that
comes from long exposure and hunger was stealing over
me. My feet and hands tingled, and I gazed dizzily
to the ocean vapor below me and the granite roof
above my head. My heart stood still in my breast, and
there was no strength left in me to shout back. I saw
the light of a lanthorn cast its red glare into the cave,
and then I must have swooned.

All that day the faithful people of my dead father's
household had been looking for me. Ever since the
moment when it was discovered that my bed was empty,
my clothes and knapsack gone, and Buce"phale away
from his stable, they had scoured the land.

At last they traced the horse's footprints and followed
them near to the cave. But the tide prevented even

109

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

these brave men from coming to me sooner, and their
distress was great when they realized that I would of a
certainty be washed out to sea.

They, however, by a last scruple of conscience, de-
termined to visit the grotto as soon as the passage lead-
ing to its narrow inlet became free, and there, to their in-
tense amazement, they found me, saved as by a miracle.

It would be useless to describe my return home; I
myself do not clearly remember it. But one thing
will stand out in my memory ever — the frantic joy of
Bertrand when we met again. My mother had been too •
thoroughly frightened to be severe. She said but little,
and what she did say concerned merely creature com-
forts of which I stood in sore need.

The tenderness of my tiny brother made me repent
greatly for what I had done, and unsolicited I promised
my mother never to act again in so reprehensible a way.
Tears came like dew on my parched little heart. I laid
my soul bare before Almighty God, and tried to pluck
my pride and stubbornness and impatience from their
bleeding roots. That night my resolve was taken; I
decided to conquer myself, and I hoped to succeed; yet
I often faltered upon rny way and mused —

"The darkness over my road doth creep —

Of a guide I am bereft;
Which path leads from this lonely deep,
Is it to right or left?"

CHAPTER VH

"The rosebud shakes because

A bird on its twig flew,
My own soul shakes because

I think, my dear, of you;

I think, my dear, of you;
My darling, charming maid,

Thou art the richest gem
My God has ever made!"

MY uncle's castle ! Is there any place in the universe
where the traditions and customs of the past have been
so extraordinarily preserved? And my uncle himself —
haughtiest of the haughty, and a trifle narrow-minded
old aristocrat, who would never abate one jot of the mag-
nificence which he considered due to the name he bore!
His stud was faultless. His cook was an artist in his
line. A retinue of admirably trained servants filled the
vast halls, the stables, and the gardens. The ban-
queting-room, the picture-gallery, the enfilades of salons,
were worthy the gallant old family tree which was his
pride. Pride of race, not of rank, was his most marked
characteristic. It showed in the erect carriage of his
head, in the flash of his dark falcon eyes, and in his
whole bearing. He was the type of a chivalrous Sei-
gneur, better fitted for the days of knighthood than for
our degenerate period. He hated everything modern
with a cruel and a savage hatred which he failed to con-
ceal or to temper, and which strongly colored all his ac-
tions, as it soured and wounded those who did not think
and feel as he did. But he was, nevertheless, too much

in

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

of a thoroughbred by nature to ever follow or accept the
vulgar indecorum of our time, which makes it possible
to state one's opinion at every turn — be it ever so harsh
— and & tons risques.

To him discourtesy was worse than the breaking of
the commandments. Hence he did not associate with
people of whom he did not approve.

His hatred of the bourgeoisie was as deep and in-
grained as the hatred of game-birds for a red dog ; but
he loved his peasants — his vassals, he called them —
and was kind and paternal to them in the extreme. He
had never married, and his noble old house was kept
by la vieille Catherine, a dragon of virtue, who bristled
with good qualities. She was a stately person, with
hair as white as silver, dark robes, and a "Henin"-
shaped cap, that gave her the appearance of a figure
taken from some old missal. I irreverently called her
la vieille Catherine, although every one else addressed
her as "Dame Catherine."

The castle was a great Gothic pile, which in days of
yore had been blasted with petronels and riddled with
arrows and bullets. Yet it still possessed a solemn
beauty, given to it in ancient times by those masterly
hands that built for the pure love of art, and with the in-
tent of erecting imperishable records of their toil. It
stood on the top of a high hill, surrounded by deep, se-
cluded valleys, dense forest lands, sheltering an abun-
dance of game in their dusky recesses. A semi-royal
palace, silent and solitary and impressive, only a few
miles from the eternally moaning ocean, but far from
the roar and filth of steam and the vandalism of prog-
ress.

I used to spend some weeks of every year there, but
my mother seldom accepted the courtly but cold invita-
tions sent to her as in duty bound by her brother-in-law.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

These two detested each other — no weaker term will
do. The grave, severe, somewhat suspicious character
of my uncle made a striking contrast to my mother's
self -indulgent, capricious and unreasonable nature.
When she brought her restless spirit, her marvellous
gowns, and her mundane fragrance to the stately old
place, he shuddered at the discordance which she pro-
duced therewith, and his grim, stern smile of disap-
proval must have cut her at times like a whip.

To me he was always good and indulgent. "Tu es
de la vieille roche.toi, petit Crapaud !" he often said.
" Tu ressembles & ton pere et & nous tous I" — a compli-
ment which pleased and gratified me beyond measure.

"And you," I retorted one day, "are like Parsifal, or
Perceforest, riding away to find the emerald cup of
legend."

He laughed his low, grave laugh. "An old Perce-
forest, then," he muttered, "on whose head much
snow has fallen."

We were riding across the home woods, and the slant-
ing beams of the setting sun pierced through the closely
packed dark stems of the glorious trees he loved so much.

"How old are you, Marguerite?" he suddenly asked,
turning in his saddle to look at me, as if an unex-
pected idea had just occurred to him.

" I will be fifteen next August, mon oncle," I replied,
proudly.

"Fifteen next August," he repeated, musingly,
" which means that, as we are in November, you are
only fourteen and three months. Par ma foi, petite file,
you look much older than that — almost a woman, in fact.
You are like a white rosebud about to burst into bloom,
my dear. Forgive your old uncle if he tells you so."

"Why, you dear old darling, how poetical you are!"
and with my usual impetuosity I threw myself almost
H 113

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

off my horse and hugged my uncle as a young bear
would its sire. I was not accustomed to hear nice things
about myself, and his words delighted me.

The dying sunlight played among the leaves, turning
them to gold, and suddenly a shadow fell athwart a
venturesome scarlet ray, thrown like a broad and daz-
zling arrow a little ahead of us.

With this weird glow shining full upon him was a
boy, mounted on a superb hunter — a boy but little over
twenty — tall, lithe, and broad-shouldered, with a thor-
oughly beautiful, fearless face, large hazel eyes, and
tawny, short-cropped curls.

"Alban!" exclaimed my uncle, "where do you drop
from?"

, The lad started a little, and looked at us with a glad
smile.

"I have ridden with the hounds all day, hoping to
find you at the meet, or during the run."

In the half-laughing words there was an inflection of
pain and regret that struck my ear with a vague sense
of sorrow. His eyes looked earnestly, almost beseech-
ingly, at me ; his lips, under his light, silky mustache,
were tremulous. Then he laughed the soft, merry
laugh of his still lingering boyhood.

" Thank God, I have found you now !" he said, simply.

My uncle turned his head towards him, and a warmth
and gentleness overspread his grim features, such as I
had seldom if ever seen there.

"Good boy!" he murmured, as we broke into a trot,
all three abreast, under the rapidly deepening forest
shadows. " Come home with us and share our dinner.
Marguerite is mattresse de maison just now, and, if you
get naught else, you may feed on flowers, for she has
taken the decoration of the table in hand, and turns it
into a fairy bower at every meal. "

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Alban was my uncle's godchild, %and the apple of his
eye. For he was also the son of his dearest friend,
the Marquis d'A. The young man had just entered
the army, and was on a short furlough before the de-
parture of his regiment, the — th Dragoons, for the south
of France. A singularly rare and interesting type was
this manly lad, capable of the maddest follies, when
roused, but shy and almost timid in his every-day bear-
ing. He enjoyed risking life and lirnb in reckless rides,
for he was terribly in earnest in whatever he undertook
to do. I had not seen him very often, for he had joined
his regiment immediately after leaving the cavalry
school at Saumur. But during this last visit to my
uncle's we had ridden and driven and walked a great
deal together, with my dear avuncular relative for a
chaperon.

Alban was a young dare-devil, who had played with
death more than once, but to me he was extraordinarily
gentle. And even young and guileless and quaintly
childish as I still was, I could see that he liked me well
in spite of all the reserve which the old French etiquette
imposed upon our slightest actions. I had never been
a moment alone with him. Such possibilities do not
exist even between cousins and near relatives in our
world. Yet, I' amour est enfant de Boh&me, et pardessus
le march4 un petit espiegle, who laughs at etiquette
and makes his meaning plain in spite of all imaginable
obstacles. I began to think in those autumn days that
Alban was a veritable hero — and so he finally proved
to be, poor, dear boy! His frank, clear eyes, so soft at
times, so trustful, his handsome features, with their
sunny candor, his daring and grit and inimitable chic,
made up a tout-ensemble that filled my youthful mind
with wonder and admiration. I was a small noddy-
bird, with no knowledge of life and no experience. But

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

I was certain that my father would have been pleased
with Alban, and that was enough to make me glory in
my drawing affection for him.

Now I look back upon myself as I was then with the
grimness of a veteran, hearing those who have never
been wounded jest at scars, but still the bloom of that
first love has never been rubbed off, nor has its memory
faded.

As we rode over the smooth sward of the stately gar-
dens, a tall, commanding figure came out from the
deep shadow of the celebrated royal elms that sheltered
the front terraces.

It was Alban 's father, who declared to us that he had
come to claim his old friend's hospitality for dinner .
The marquis was a gentilhomme de race, if ever there
was one. He possessed a supreme and easy grace,
full of dignity and many martial and virile qualities,
wonderfully blended together, and there was no effort or
assumption in his courtly manners. He was a stately
personage, with iron-gray hair and long, sweeping
mustaches like those of a Pandour — a man of iron cour-
age and strong constitution — was this old-fashioned
grand-seigneur, and my heart went out towards him
as he lifted me from my saddle and before setting me
down on the sanded drive kissed my cheek as if I had
been his own little daughter.

It was seven o'clock when we assembled in the
great dining-hall, where our four covers were laid at
the upper end of the long board, loaded with plate, and,
as my uncle had promised, with flowers and fruit that I
had arranged. Below the salt sat my uncle's chaplain,
his secretary, his chief steward, and his equerry; for
such was the ancient rule he invariably followed. The
moon was rising, and the nightingales were singing
outside, and through one of the open casements long

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

flower-laden tendrils of clematis and jessamine were
swung gently inwards by the light night wind.

Instead of going up to my room immediately after
dinner, as usual, I lingered on the terrace, where the
three men were smoking. Finally I wandered off to
where a climbing Rose de Dijon, covered with hun-
dreds of blossoms, cast a shadow checkered by moon-
beams upon the stone flooring, and sat down on the
elaborately carved balustrade. I could not have ex-
plained why, but my whole soul was filled with a sort
of awe and trembled within me as if I had reached the
supreme moment of my fate.

Suddenly Alban detached himself from the group
and joined me. His face was pale and grave, but his
eyes had a suppressed, and to me a surprising, light in
their depths. I felt as if the dark woods, the sleeping
parterres, were wheeling around me. We were both
mute, and he no longer looked at me, but at the star-
studded sky above us, beseechingly, it seemed almost.

"Marguerite," he said at last, tremulously, "I am a
man of few protestations — hardly a man, even as yet
—but I know my own mind, and I am steadfast and
true. I love you, my dear, with all my heart, with all
my soul, with all my strength! You are too young
as yet to hear and understand such words, but I am
going away so soon, that I could not bear to part from
you without telling you that I am yours, and will be
yours always!"

I looked straight up at him, and without a word I
placed both my hands into his. I heard the quick in-
drawing of his breath, as he knelt at my feet and rested
his curly head against my knee.

"Marguerite! My Marguerite des Marguerites!" he
murmured, softly, "my pearl of pearls! my treasure,
you are the richest gem that God has ever made!"

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

With tears in my eyes, I rose, trembling a little. How
deliciously all this sounded! Alas! poor little me!

" My father and my godfather know that I love you,
Marguerite/' he continued, "and they are glad that it
should be so. In a year I will come back and claim you
as my own, my little, beloved girl!"

We were now standing side by side, and he drew me
gently towards him. Suddenly I was filled with a pal-
pitating, intoxicating hope. I felt intuitively that the
old, fearless, high-handed, single-hearted love which
had inspired great deeds to long-vanished knights and
ladies was within our grasp, that it was not dead, but
lived again in all its poetry and romance, and little as I
suspected or knew of love, my instinct told me that
Alban was a lover such as any maiden might be proud
of — might esteem, respect, and adore. With him I would
be free forever from tyranny and injustice. We
would live a wonderful life, tissee d'or et de sole, like
unto a continuous fairy tale. All these wild, joyous
thoughts whirled through my brain as my head rested
confidently on his shoulder and his hand softly caressed
my hair.

" I will love you forever, Marguerite, with a love that
is a religion — a love so sacred, so holy, so pure, that
you will learn to give me such a love in return."

The night wind shook the rose-leaves upon us, and
the nightingales in the thickets stopped their singing,
as if they purposely hushed their melodies in order to
listen to that other alleluia d' amour uttered so near
to them.

A little later we came hand-in-hand to where the spon-
sors of our love still sat, lazily smoking.

"It is wise sometimes to listen to one's heart/' said
my uncle, stretching his hands in solemn benediction

towards us.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

What a peerless evening this was! C'&ait le ciel!
But when the time came to separate a swift, painful
thought made all my joy turn to bitterness. For my
uncle said that on the morrow he would write to tell
my mother of what had happened, and ask her for her
consent to a conditional engagement. I had forgotten
her, I am sorry to confess, as completely as if she had
never existed. Would she approve? or would she take
me away and separate me from my newly found hap-
piness? Alas! she adopted the latter course. I might
have known from the first that she would. My uncle's
letter brought her to us as rapidly as her posters could
draw her carriage there.

She stood in too much awe of her brother-in-law —
who was also my guardian and my brother's — to open-
ly oppose his wishes in this matter, but she adopted
the anxious, plaintive mien of a doting parent, eager
to insure her beloved child's welfare. After shedding
many tears, which did not lessen in any way her ex-
ceeding loveliness — she knew the art of weeping grace-
fully— she implored " her dear brother " to let her take
her " precious little girl " away for a while. Of course
she argued that she had nothing against Alban, en
principe. He was all that could be desired; perhaps
not very wealthy, but, to be sure, what did that matter?
Dear little Marguerite had enough and to spare. But
time was needed to prove the sincerity of such an af-
fection, besides which she would never permit her
daughter to marry before she had reached her eigh-
teenth year, etc., etc., etc.

My guardian uncle, who acted also as my guardian
angel, just then was forced to confess that there was
truth in what she said, and he brought me round to a
comparatively reasonable state of mind. The upshot
of it all was that a few days later I started with my

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

mother, Bertrand, my Abbe", and a few indispensable
members of our household, for the Riviera, which, so
my "doting parent " claimed, was the only place where
she could recover from so many nerve-shattering emo-
tions.

My last interview with Alban was heart-breaking.
We were so young that the separation was all the more
severe. Such sorrows are healed quicker than one
thinks, but yet they leave a scar that other blows are apt
to open again. C'est la vie, et elle n'estpas gaie! We
plighted our troth, and the dear boy, with tears in his
eyes, slipped on my finger his mother's own " bague de
fiangailles," a grand, translucent emerald, in an old-fash-
ioned setting of dead gold and diamonds. It was a rare
and a very valuable jewel, at which my mother looked
askance; but my uncle was present when I timidly
showed it to her, and so I was allowed to retain it. My
first ring ! That deep-hued gem, just like the color of
the forest trees beneath which I had met Alban on
that momentous afternoon I have described earlier.

Brittany was to know us no more for a long time ;
but I was not aware of this, then, or else I would have
felt still more wretched than I did. From the Riviera
we wandered, in the spring, to the Italian lakes, and
then to Tyrol. In August we went to Baden, which
was as crowded as it always is, and overflowing with
foreign hordes : Russians, Austrians, Englishmen —
foremost among them the " dear prince " — Englishwom-
en of high rank, who had come thither to bask in the
sunshine of " His Presence" ; South- Americans, clothed
as brilliantly and chattering as loudly as a cage full of
parrots ; North- Americans, who were " doing " Europe
with scrupulous care and attention ; Greeks and Turks
and even Egyptians, whose long, dark coats and red
tarbouches gave them a ludicrous resemblance to so

120

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

many bottles of scarlet • sealed claret — in one word,
the usual fashionable gathering, idling, laughing,
promenading, gossiping, and listrning to the music
all day long in the parks, or at their respective hotels.

I hated the whole thing, and longed for Brittany.
Bert rand and I spent all our time with the Abbe", on the
outskirts of the parks, in the woods, or at the chalet
which we had taken for the season. It was a pretty,
carved toy, overrun with wistaria and honeysuckle,
and surrounded by comparatively large grounds all
a -bloom with gorgeous, mundane - looking, frivolous
flowers, with which I could not make friends. German
soil, I reflected, could not bring forth anything that I
might in honor admire.

The houses in Baden all had a lively expression,
with their bright green shutters and gayly striped
awnings, and the people were entirely too dashing,
too noisy, too fond of pleasure for my taste. Of Alban
I heard rarely—short, stiff little letters, sent under
cover of my mother, which, under the circumstances,
could not be other than froides et guindees. But I
did not make allowances for that, and when compared
with his impassioned words, they struck my heart
with an ever-increasing chill. He was still with his
regiment in the South, and mentioned the numerous
fetes to which he and his brother officers were bidden.
But of his love for me he never spoke. The Tou-
jours fidelement a vous at the end of each of these
naturally trivial documents, and the Chere petite mienne
at the beginning, was all the tenderness they contained.
I was as yet too unformed, too primitive, to read the
deep feeling between the lines, or to realize that this
young suitor of mine, this enfant gate de la vie, was
true and loyal to his promises and to his love.

I have thought since that my mother's little com-

121

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

ments were the triumph of artfulness : "Alban s' amuse";
"Alban est a I' age ou tout invite au plaisir"; " Char-
mant gargon, on doit se le disputer," etc., etc. Every
little laughingly spoken, double-barbed sentence made
me wince, for it never occurred to me that they were the
first telling shots of a carefully and shrewdly planned
campaign in which I should be the loser. Of course, our
semi-engagement had been kept a profound secret, and
not even my dear Abb6 knew a word about it.

One morning Bertrand and I started bright and early
for a distant forest glen, accompanied by my maid and
by the boy's valet de chambre, the same old soldier who
had acted in a like capacity for my father. The still-
ness of the dense woods was disturbed only by the sound
of rushing waters and the calls and trills of countless
birds. We walked slowly over the moss and short, dense
green grass. The calm was something beautiful be-
neath the verdant vault which shut off the ardent rays
of the sun, and my dear little brother and I laughed
and chattered light - heartedly as we went along. At
the top of our voices we sang snatches of our favorite
Breton songs, two of which I roughly transcribe here
as I have already done in the case of the dear old
New Year's carol, simply because I love the sound —
nay, the very look — of them, for the sake of "Auld
Lang Syne." I was still a child, with all a child's love
for mirth, and fun, so that we were soon scampering
among the lichen-grown rocks, like two merry squirrels
playing at hide-and-seek, and pelting each other with
clusters of flowerets and buds made into fragrant balls.

Bertrand was growing every day dearer to me. This
handsome little lad of seven, with his wonderful gray
eyes, his golden curls, active little body, and his delicate
coloring and slender, muscular frame, was the only
playmate I ever cared for. When with him I was once •

122

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

more a romping, agile boy myself, and as my Lady
Mother had long since repealed her veto against our
being together, we simply adored each other, and spent
all our leisure hours in close companionship, riding,

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

fe

fc£=£

driving, and walking, or playing a la petite guerre with
a wonderful collection of leaden soldiers, our favorite
toy.

At last we reached a small gorge, enclosed by fern-

124

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

covered rocks, where exquisite flowers blossomed in
profusion, and forthwith we set to work to gather cy-
clamens, violets, and blue gentians. A tall bunch of
foxgloves on the top of a dangerously steep bank so
took my fancy that with my usual recklessness I started
to climb the almost perpendicular incline like a regular
monkey. Unfortunately I stepped on a loose stone,
and, unable to recover my footing, I tumbled to the bot-
tom of the miniature precipice, where, much disgusted
with myself, I lay on a patch of moss. The worst of it
was that Bertrand and the servants were quite out of
hearing, he having just run back to get our flask of cold
tea from the waiting carriage. My ankle was badly
twisted, and I was perfectly incapable of getting up
without assistance. Twice I tried to struggle to my
feet, but at last I gave up the attempt, and, sitting reso-
lutely down on the now wof ully crushed moss, I began
to halloo lustily, in hopes of attracting attention. No
such luck was in store for me, however, and I was grow-
ing disgusted with myself for my carelessness, when a
tall figure came running towards me from the direction
opposite to that which Bertrand had taken. The un-
known was a handsome man, with clear blue eyes and
extremely long, silky, fair mustaches. His Norfolk
jacket, knickerbockers, and untanned leather gaiters
did not prevent him from looking every inch a typical
aristocrat. Taking off his soft felt hat, and bowing
with a grace which even in my ridiculous position I
could not help noticing, he asked whether he could be of
any assistance to me. I replied to this singularly well-
timed offer by asking him to aid me to regain my
footing. This was a difficult task, for my ankle was
so sore that walking was out of the question. For a
moment we looked at each other in some dismay, and
then, struck suddenly by the ludicrous sid^ of the affair,

125

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

I burst into uncontrollable laughter. He speedily fol-
lowed my example, though in a quieter and more dig-
nified manner. Then I asked this interesting unknown
to be so very kind as to step down to the road in order to
summon my servants, adding that my brother's valet
was a strong fellow who would carry me easily to the
victoria waiting for us on the high-road. To my great
surprise an expression of vexation spread over my new
acquaintance's clean-cut features.

"If you will allow me, mademoiselle/' he said, quick-
ly, and with some bitterness, " I think I can fulfil that
office as well as a servant. It will save time, and I will
endeavor to make the transit as little disagreeable to
you as I can."

Observing that a refusal on my part would most cer-
tainly hurt his feelings, I thanked him, and, apologizing
for the trouble I was giving him, allowed him to lift me
from the ground. He carried me as easily and com-
fortably as if I had been a baby, to the spot where my
servants and Bertrand greeted me with intense aston-
ishment. I explained to them what had occurred, and I
was soon helped into the carriage. Turning to the
bel inconnu, I thanked him again for his kindness,
for I thought that indeed he was a real trump.

"It is I who thank you, mademoiselle/' he replied,
" for having granted me the privilege of being of service
to you." Then, he added, somewhat hesitatingly, "I
hope that this is not the last time that I shall be honored
by seeing you. An acquaintance so romantically be-
gun should not end abruptly. "

My faithful maid, Marie, who took her duties as duenna
very seriously to heart, intervened here, murmuring
something about "monsieur's kindness," and stating
the necessity of taking me home at once, in case our
prolonged absence should cause anxiety.

126

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

And then we drove off, leaving him standing bare-
headed on the edge of the road, his blue eyes following
me lingeringly, while naughty Bertrand, under the
flapping brim of his large sailor hat, made faces at him
— la nique, as we used to call it.

For a few days I suffered a good deal from that
sprained ankle, but I soon recovered, and forgot all
about the handsome stranger who had come to my
rescue so opportunely.

I was very much taken up just then with the idea of
appearing at my first party, and only hoped that the
accident would in no way interfere with this great event.

Grand - Duchess V., who was spending the season
at Baden, had announced that she would give a bal
blanc — a novelty in those days. None of the dancers
would be over twenty, but it was not to be, strictly speak-
ing, a children's ball, for the venerable age of twelve
was to be a conditio sine qua non in order to receive an
invitation. Poor Bertrand felt very bitter, since he was
thus ranked among the infants who were not invited.

On the eventful evening I drove with my mother to

ic grand-ducal villa, feeling very much pleased with
myself. She was an artist in her way, and my plain
white voile frock, made a la Nicbe, with the skirt clear-
ing the ground by several inches, and the clasp of fresh
white marguerites barreting my long, hanging braids,
were a poem of their kind.

I had been told so of ten I was an ugly little thing

that vanity had no share in my elation and delight,

but I have never been shy, and I looked forward to

the evening's amusement with eager anticipation. Nor

ras I disappointed. The dear, kind - hearted grand-

luchess whispered here and there that this was my first

little social treat, and everybody was most attentive to

me. The grand-duke insisted upon dancing the open-

127

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

ing quadrille with me, in spite of the adamantine edict
which prohibited all grown-up people from joining us
young disciples of Terpsichore.

Suddenly, at the end of the ballroom, I saw my mys-
arious rescuer. He was leaning against the wall,
j.nd was literally devouring me with his eyes.

Just as the orchestra struck up the "Blue Danube"
waltz, he crossed the floor, and, bowing low before me,
said, in French, with a slight but very pretty foreign
accent, " Voulez-vous, mademoiselle, me faire la grace de
valser avec moi ?"

From her seat under a group of palms my mother
signalled to me most peremptorily to accept, and I did so
at once.

What a waltz that was ! I had never imagined any-
thing like it, the gliding, easy, equal motion, the de-
lightful sense of security while the strong arm was en-
circling me, the intoxicating music, the perfect floor. It
was a dream.

A marguerite fell from my hair as we at last stopped,
and he furtively slipped it within his glove. I looked at
him with some surprise, but he drew my arm within his
and led me towards the lamp-lit terrace as if he had just
done the most natural thing in the world.

The lovely spectacle presented by the illuminated
gardens pleased me immensely, and, if I am to tell the
truth, I was flattered by the evident devotion of my tall,
good-looking companion, who, now that I saw him in
glittering full-dress uniform, attracted me very much
by his soldierly splendor.

I stood beside him, quiet as a mouse, the sweet music
of the orchestra throbbing in the air about us, the flower-
laden balcony in front of us wrapped in a golden mist.
I had not the faintest idea who he was, for he had taken,
evidently, the law into his own hands, and had asked

128

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

nobody to introduce him to me. But my mother's gest-
ure of unmistakable command showed that she was
perfectly informed as to the rank and status of the man
I had looked upon as a Robin des Bois. He must cer-
tainly be a great personage of some kind, or she would
not have silently bidden me accept so unceremonious an
invitation. He plucked a half-blown white rose from
a vase near by and fastened it deftly in my hair, whence
the marguerite had dropped.

" Du bist wie eine Blume," he whispered, under his
breath, and then, with the suspicion of a laugh, he said,
aloud :

"One good turn deserves another. Will you reserve
the cotillion for me?"

"If mamma lets me stay for it, yes," I replied; "but
she does not like me to keep late hours." He laughed
outright this time.

" Why, you are a little woman already. Surely you
are not still confined to the school-room and to the con-
stant care of your governesses?"

" I have no governesses — at least, I mean, no gover-
ness in chief. I have been brought up by an abbe" . "

" Dear me, what a lucky abbe" ! But his task is now
surely accomplished. One cannot perfect perfection."

It was my turn to laugh. " I wish mamma could hear
you," I exclaimed. " She thinks me very far from per-
fection, I promise you. "

How wonderful all this seemed to me. But wonders
were not at an end, for my usually so severe and fault-
finding parent not only permitted me to dance the co-
tillion, but when we drove home she actually praised
me — a thing she had never done before — patted my
head, and declared that I was quite a credit to her. She
also made me acquainted with the identity of Robin des
Bois. It was a revelation which made my sleepy eyes
i 129

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

open very wide with an astonishment not unmixed with
a queer little thrill of pride at what my mother called
my most amazing conquest. Sometimes earthly things
have their importance and their weight, especially when
one is very young and very inexperienced, which cer-
tainly was very much the case with me.

"Ah, be content with earthly things,
Nor seek the mystic's vain desire,
Though life into the darkness wings.

"See how the red sun lowly swings,

Tipping the yellow corn with fire,
And be content with earthly things.

"The bee upon the blossom clings,

The birds of summer's sweetness choir.
Though life into the darkness wings.

"The wind that through the starlight sings

Is full of peace : then why aspire?
Ah, be content with earthly things.

"Content with what the morrow brings.

Forgetful of the far-off pyre,
Though life into the darkness wings.

"Sweet are its chequered happenings,

Its little loves, its petty ire.
Ah, be content with earthly things,
Though life into the darkness wings.*'

CHAPTER VIII

"Quinze ans! — 1'age celeste ou 1'arbre de la vie,

Sous la tiede oasis du desert ambaumg,
Baigne ses fruits dor£s de myrrhe et d'ambroisie,
Et pour f6conder 1'air comme un palmier d'Asie,

N'a qu'a jeter au vent son voile parfum61
Quinze ans — 1'age ou la femme, au jour de sa naissance,
Sortit des mains de Dieu, si blanche d'innocence,
Si riche de beaute", que son pere immortel
De ses phalanges d'or en fit 1'age e"ternell"

HALCYON days! The little girl, always thrust in
the background, always found fault with, humiliated,
scolded, repressed, was suddenly a petted creature to
whom everything was permitted, and whose every wish
was gratified almost before it was uttered! What was
the meaning of it all? I could not understand. Ber-
trand used to put his arms around my neck and hug
me delightedly, saying again and again: "Oh, you
poor dear old Margot, I am so glad to see you treated
as well at last as I have always been myself!"

Dear little chap! There was not a tinge of meanness
or of jealousy in his nature, and I loved him for it.

Robin des Bois was everlastingly with us, and a very
pleasant companion he was. For he organized excur-
sions, sent my mother quantities of flowers, danced
attendance upon me under her benignant eye — wonder
of wonders — and made himself so indispensable that
even I looked forward to his daily appearance upon the
scene with unfeigned pleasure.

I did not realize that he was the magician who had
thus transformed my existence for me, and although

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

I sometimes imitated blunt little Bertrand and saucily
called him Karl tout court (which, by the way, seemed
to enchant him), I considered him quite a venerable
person, in spite of his good looks and surprisingly youth-
ful appearance. For was he not twenty-one years my
senior? Presque un ancetre, en fin!

One evening he brought me a great cluster of forget-
me-nots as blue as his eyes, and asked me to wear them
for his sake. Something in the tone of his voice grated
upon me, and I laid the flowers on the table, saying,
coldly, that I did not like forget-me-nots, and that they
were silly flowers. An angry look from my mother
left me absolutely unmoved. I was beginning indeed
to pay but scant attention to her opinion, for her sudden
change of front with regard to me had bred a singular
carelessness in my attitude towards her which was not
unmixed with a tinge of contempt. Cold, cruel, some-
times fierce, but always dignified and sarcastic, she
was a being created to inspire awe. But when she was
sweet and affectionate she became extremely insincere,
and failed to impress me with anything but distrust.

Karl seemed much hurt at my rejection of his insipid
flowers, and after dinner he withdrew with my mother
to her own sanctum, where they were closeted together
until long after I had retired.

On the next day I was summoned early to my mother's
dressing-room. She was sitting near one of the windows
looking out upon endless geranium-beds, scarlet, pink,
and cherry - colored, showing dazzlingly bright in the
sun-glare, her delicate profile lighted a la Rembrandt
by the conflict of brightness and shade fighting for
mastery beneath the downspread awning.

"Karl, my dearest/' she began, in her softest and
most dulcet tones, "has done you a great honor. He
wishes you to be his wife."

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THK TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

I Lid the ceiling fallen upon my head I could not have
been more surprised. Incredulously I gazed at my love-
ly mother with a sort of fascination, watching the gentle
rise and fall of the lace flounces above her graceful
breast.

"Why, Matushka," I said at last, with an irrepressi-
ble laugh, "you are making fun of me. Karl is old
enough to be my father ; surely you mean that he has
asked you to marry him. He cannot fancy that I love
him! How very, very foolish!"

A truly imperial frown contracted her dark eyebrows.

"Old? What ridiculous nonsensel" she exclaimed.
"Why, he is barely thirty-six! And as to your loving
him or not, you can be no judge of such a matter. What
should you know about love? Love is an idea, a fancy
—it does not last. What is needed in a union which
endures through life is solid esteem. You must learn
to understand the prose of existence, my child. Life is
far from being all poetry, as you seem to think. God
forbid that I should advise you any kind of worldliness,
but still truth compels me to speak to you as I do. Re-
member that as Karl's wife you will have it in your
power to do much good, and that your marriage may
be made subservient to God's own service. This is a
very grand offer, Dushka. Your position will be one
of almost unequalled magnificence. And this alliance,
moreover, suits me absolutely. You know that I am
not easily dissuaded from anything I wish, so do
not expect me to yield to any girlish gush, silliness,

id fallacies. Marry Karl — I can assert that you

-ill."

I began to be seriously alarmed, for I knew that my

>ther's will was of iron and her tactics so clever that

ic generally carried her point on all occasions.

And what about Alban? I instinctively avoided

133

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

speaking his name, feeling that it should be kept in
reserve as a final and decisive argument.

" Why are you so anxious to get rid of me, mother?"
I said, gently. " Are you tired of having me with you?"

" What idea is this, Marguerite? Pray recollect your-
self ; your manners leave much room for improvement.
I insist upon your telling me now what your objection
is to marrying Karl."

"I fhink that he is a great deal too old for me and
that he is also not a man I could either trust or ever care
for."

"My dear, what do you know about men? How can
you venture to form an opinion, and how dare you as-
sert such a thing of a person whom I consider a most
suitable husband for you? I am surprised at you.
Karl has behaved most charmingly towards you, and
you are very ungrateful. But enough of this. You
are my daughter and must do as I wish in this as in
all other respects."

For a moment we confronted one another. I was
seriously alarmed, for I felt that any further resistance
on my part would not avail. I had been so often bowed
down by my mother's inflexible decisions that I knew
to my cost, alas! that she never yielded when once her
mind was made up. Moreover, I was still too much of
a child not to be in a measure dazzled by the brilliant
prospect of becoming, at an age when most girls are
still in the school-room, one of the greatest ladies at the
most superb court of Europe. It did, in fact, at one
moment flash through my mind that my mother's words
and point of view were not so surprising, after all, per-
chance.

Had it not been for Alban I am not sure that I might
not have yielded at once, for she became suddenly very
winning and persuasive. God forgive her, she knew

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

only too well what .she was doini^. She was fully a wan-
that Karl was a rou6 and a d6bauch€, that his intrigues
had heen countless, and that lie had ne\er attempted t«»
curb his passions, beini^ burdened by but few principles
and entirely devoid of morality.

He was for the time beiiiij madly in love with me, but
this particular brand of sentiment was not of a nature
to attract a similar feeling in the very i nire and guileless
heart of an innocent girl. My mother could not help
knowing that a few hours would suffice to open my
eyes to the future that lay before me, that though I was
barely fifteen, yet my girlhood would soon be crushed
like a spring blossom torn by a ruthless hand. She
knew decidedly and & n'en pas dotiter what I would
bind myself to, and she could not fail to see that Karl's
offer of marriage was the result of a fiery and unworthy
passion — a means to an end — the only means to obtain
the prize he coveted.

I hardly heard her finishing sentences, although the
last words thereof aroused me from the deep reverie into
which I had allowed myself to fall. "To-night you
will greet Karl as your fiance"," she said, as she rose
from her chair, indicating by this that the interview was
brought to a close and the case dismissed.

" I am sorry, Matushka," I said, with sudden decision,
" but this is impossible ; I am engaged to Alban, I love
him, and I do not love Karl."

Oh! the look of boundless scorn which she gave me,
and the laugh that followed — low, melodious, a silvery
ripple of long-drawn-out irony— making me tremble as
if I had unexpectedly been struck a perfidious blow
between the shoulders.

"Alban!" The word contained yet more insidious
mockery than the burst of mirthless laughter. " Well,
my girl, if you are going to sacrifice such a man as

J35

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Karl to a worthless boy admirer who has by this time
not only tired of you, but of the very thought of you, 1
cannot say much for your powers of intellect."

"Tired of me!" I repeated in dismay.

"So much so/' she continued, still laughing, "that
he is going to marry another heiress, an English beauty
whom he met and fell in love with just as rapidly as he
did with you. Que voulez-vous ? Ce sonfles hommes qui
sont volages; et bien fol est qui s'y fie !"

It was much later only that it struck me as strange
that my mother should have been able to lay her hand
with such convenient a propos upon the slip of news-
paper which she held out to me at that instant, saying,
in the same little sneering way, "Here is your proof,
if proof there need be."

For a moment the printed lines danced before my eyes,
blurred by a queer, misty, shifting twinkle. Then they
grew plainer and seemed to burn before me as if they
had been written with blood.

"On annonce le tres prochain mariage de Lady Z.
la ravissante fille du celebre Diplomate Anglais Lord
X. avec le fils du Marquis d'A. Les jeunes gens se
sont rencontres cet ete dans le Midi ou I'heureux fiance
est en garnison, et out regu le fameux coup de foudre
tant vante des romanciers," etc. The trivial, nauseat-
ing journalistic prose proved too much for me, and I
allowed the paper to flutter from my nerveless hand to
the floor.

Poor, stupid, easily misled child! It never occurred
to me that this was a case of mistaken identity, that
the "superiorly informed" journalist meant Alban's
brother, who had been visiting him, although I was
not aware of this, and that my boy was true to me, true
as steel, while my mother had joyfully pounced upon
this piece a conviction which made it possible for her to

136

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

attain at a bound the completion of her so cleverly
laid plans. What she would have done without it, I
cannot say. But probably, being given the many re-
sources of her brilliant imagination, she would no doubt
have found other roads to success.

At any rate, she must have thought her victory an
easy one, and might have said with the great Napoleon,
Rien ne r£ussit comme un succds, for with blazing eyes,
undimmed by the faintest suspicion of tears, I looked
unflinchingly at her, and in a voice so absolutely dis-
cordant that it sounded as if it belonged to some strange
and unknown being, I said, haughtily :

"You are quite right, Matushka, I have been very
sentimental and ridiculous. I am ready to marry Karl
whenever you like, to marry him or any other man whom
you select for me, so long as I can marry at once, and put
an end to all this — this — " here that queer new voice
broke a little, and I shuddered — " this outrage!" I finally
pronounced, and at a run I escaped from the room, never
stopping in my terrified flight until I reached a secluded
thicket at the end of the garden, where I flung myself
brutally down upon the ground.

Of the hour that followed I have no clear remem-
brance. It was not a pleasant one. Torn by conflict-
ing emotions, I heaped bitter reproaches upon my mother
at one moment for having separated me from Alban
and thus brought about the wreck of all my hopes, and
the next I commended her for the foresight and pru-
dence that had spared me the inconceivable bitterness
of being jilted. "Ah! mon bel ami," thought I, "you
are marrying a noble heiress — less noble and probably
less of an heiress than I am myself — but I need not
break my heart over such a trifle, for my reply to your
billet de faire part will, by my own marriage announce-
ment, bearing a name coupled with mine that will strike

i37

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

" you " with some astonishment. And then, suddenly,
helpless, irresistible tears came in floods to my relief,
making me look so unlike my usual self that when, at
last, I crept home to dress for dinner and for the trying
ordeal which was to come, my maid held up her hands
in indignant horror and fell to weeping herself, out of
sheer sympathy.

Before I went down-stairs — a transformed being, clad
with exquisite care in white gauze — although I was still
ghastly pale and preternaturally serious, every outward
trace of what I had just been through was effaced. I had
coldly and solemnly drawn Alban's emerald ring from
my finger, and had carefully locked it away in a secret
recess of my jewel-case. Hardly had I performed this
cruelly painful little ceremony when a footman knocked
at the door and placed in Marie's hands an enormous
white bouquet and an oval package tied with snowy
satin ribbons.

Without a single thrill of pleasure or curiosity I laid
the flowers on the bed and pulled the parcel open. It
contained a white velvet box wherein lay fifteen rows
of matchless pearls, as big as hazel-nuts, and a card on
which was written in French : " I send, with my ten-
derest gratitude and my eternal love and reverence,
pearls to my priceless pearl. Wear them, for my sake,
as a symbol of the chains that henceforth bind me to
you.— KARL."

Poor Marie's eyes were distended with amazed ad-
miration as she timidly touched these royal gems.
" Plus belles que celles de votre maman, cent fois plus
belles, ma petite cherie," she murmured, rapturously,
attempting to clasp them about my neck. I pushed her
off, petulantly. " Drop these — chains ! " I said, somewhat
incoherently. " I will wear them on my wedding-day, for I
am going to be married very soon. Aren't you pleased ?"

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Marie looked at me with stupefaction. "Married?"
she echoed; "my little white lamb, are you joking?
Married, and to whom? To Monsieur Alban? Is he
coming here?"

"Monsieur Alban, forsooth! how little you know me,
ma bonne fille. No, not to a brainless, heartless baby
like him."

"Surely," she whispered, her face blanching and
her hand grasping my arm almost violently — "surely,
you are not going to marry — that — that — "

"Hush, Marie!" I interrupted, severely, and with a
firmness which had never as yet been mine. " I am en-
gaged, and I will soon be married, as I tell you, and I
will be ever so mighty a personage, and if you behave
very nicely I will take you away with me to live in my
palaces and castles and villas, and on my yachts, too."

" Bon Dieu I Sainte Vierge Marie, ma bonne pa-
tronne ! Prenez-nous en pitie, ma petite fille est devenue
folle I" muttered the astounded woman, crossing herself
devoutly to keep away the evil spirits which in her
opinion had taken up their abode in my brain.

I shrugged my shoulders, irritated at her astonish-
ment; but, suddenly seized with remorse, I flung my
arms about her, roughly kissed her on both cheeks, and
fled down-stairs without waiting to hear more.

I paused to recover my breath in the central hall,
which wore a very festive appearance and was gayly
decorated with flowering plants. " Ca commence bien,"
I thought, bitterly. " Allons y gaiement !" and then I
made my way to the drawing-room, which was filled
with an admirably selected gathering of guests — Le
dessus du panierl la creme de la creme I la fleur des pois I
in one word. There was a murmur of congratulation
as I entered, and the pride which was second nature to me
stood me in good stead and held me upright and

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

smiling, while I was receiving compliments and fe-
licitations.

Karl was at my side, but said not a word. For the
first time I saw him looking serious, and this gravity
pleased me far better than could have any protestations
or effusiveness. The dinner seemed interminable. I
was silent during its whole wearisome length, and ate
nothing. Karl had the supreme tact to say very little
to me. Once only he bent his handsome head and mur-
mured so that nobody else could hear what he whis-
pered :

"You have made me supremely happy, Marguerite.
The devotion of a lifetime will be as nothing to repay
you for your generous consent to my heart's greatest
desire." I gave him a rapid, beseeching glance, and
he immediately turned to his neighbor, Grand-Duchess
A., and entered into a lively conversation with her.

When all the guests had taken their departure save
Karl he clasped both my hands within his own and
kissed them passionately.

"I thank you," he murmured with evident emotion.
"I told you the simple truth when I said that you had
made me supremely happy. I wish you to be happy,
too, Marguerite, to enjoy life while you can, and to leave
grave thoughts and grave cares for older years. You
look very serious, my little child. But you are tired
now. Go and shut your pretty eyes and sleep the sleep
of youth and of love !"

My mother, resplendent in pearl-hued velvet, point de
Venise, and sapphires, smiled a little triumphantly as
she heard him. She had landed her big fish, and it
pleased her to see it glitter at the end of the hook.

"Have I your permission to give your daughter her
engagement ring?" he asked her, with one of his inimi-
table bows.

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I

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

" Faites done, mon cher," she replied; " c'est votre
droit, vous pouiez meme I'embrasser, si ions y tenez."

Involuntarily I drew back. My mother's flippancy
and slight, mocking smile enraged me, and Karl's calm
and courtly answer made him rise at once surpassingly
in my esteem.

" j'y tiens, madame, croyez-le, mats pas comme cela,
h son hen re."

I hardly noticed the scintillating half-hoop of marvel-
lous diamonds which he slipped on my finger, for "in
petto " I was thinking, " I can surely be as generous as
he/' and unhesitatingly I lifted my face to his! A deep
flush spread over his features, his arms encircled me,
and he closed my eyes with his lips.

" Vmis etes un petit amour, ma cherie," he whispered,
as he released me.

Of the six weeks that followed there is little to say.
I felt sometimes like a child who stands in the bewilder-
ment of too many New Year's presents, for wedding-
gifts were pouring in upon me from every corner of
Europe; splendid, sparkling, magnificent, undeniably
welcome presents, for I cannot deny that I loved jewels,
and my days were a perpetual round of fetes. We had
left Baden, and were in Paris at our solemn old residence
in the Faubourg. Lengthy councils with famous cou-
turiers took up a great deal of my time. Soon I would
journey to my fiancees own land, where our marriage
was to take place, and my mother declared that it was
impossible for us to go back to Brittany before that early
date. I had not heard from Alban again. His em-
erald still lay in the secret drawer of my coffret a bijoux,
for, with a feeling of jealousy and vindictiveness quite
unusual to me, I would not for a moment entertain the
idea of returning it to him. The " English beauty and
heiress " had, I thought, long ere this been provided with

141

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

another gem taken from the collection of the long dead
Marquise. This ring Was mine. And though I would
now never wear it, neither should anybody else. I had
my hours of discouragement — many of them — when I
silently but bitterly reproached my mother for taking
me away from Alban, as she had done. "Poor boy/'
I would then think, "he grew tired of waiting/' For
it seemed to me, indeed, that years, instead of months,
had elapsed since that glorious autumn night when he
had told me of his love. At those moments the very
touch of my mother's hand, her smile, her voice, her
every gesture, maddened me, and I looked at her so
strangely and hostilely that she would fall into her old
habit of scolding me, and used to tell me that I was fa-
rouche, une enfant terrible, etc., etc., etc.

I knew very well that I did not love Karl. I was
touched and flattered by his countless and unceasing
attentions, and often taxed myself with ingratitude for
giving him so little in return. He was an ideal fiance",
always in a sunny mood, always ready to say or do a
graceful thing; but the divine spark was missing from
our intercourse, and instinctively I felt this.

One day, when we were stepping from the carriage
in the Rue de la Paix, before a famous jeweller's, we
came face to face with Alban's father. I felt myself
growing as pale as a ghost, while my mother, on the
contrary, and much to my surprise, flushed scarlet.
The stately old man raised his hat in profound saluta-
tion, and, in spite of her obvious desire to avoid talking
to him, she could not do otherwise than speak a few
words of greeting.

With an audacious and dazzling smile, she remarked
hurriedly :

" I must congratulate you on your son's approaching
wedding ; I hear that he is very happy."

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I

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

The Marquis bowed stiffly. " I may, I presume, offer
my own congratulations in return/' he said, coldly.
"Marguerite is certainly fulfilling your highest ambi-
tions."

The stern, slightly contemptuous look in his eyes
galled me. What did he mean by speaking like that,
when it was he who should have felt both ashamed and
uncomfortable? This utterly confounded me.

"Marguerite is a good child," drawled my mother,
placing a caressing hand on my shoulder.

"And a very happy one," I interrupted boldly, al-
though there was a big lump in my throat and an
agonizing sensation at my heart.

Again he bowed in the same uncompromising, icy
fashion. "Your assurance thereof is very pleasing to
hear, but — " Here my mother interrupted him with
a rudeness which I had never known her to render
herself guilty of before:

" Marguerite, we must not keep the Marquis standing
thus bareheaded in this keen wind," and with a regal
inclination of her lovely head she drew me abruptly
into the great and superb shop, the door of which had
during this colloquy been patiently held open by her
footman.

What would have occurred had the Marquis been al-
lowed to finish his sentence? I have often thought of
that. The misunderstanding would have been cleared
up, no doubt, and my faith in Alban would have been
restored, but was it not too late to break off my mar-
riage, and, even if this had been possible, would my
mother — nay, even my guardian, enraged though he
was at the present state of affairs — have faced the scan-
dal of such a rupture?

Who shall probe the mystery of the past, who shall
say " this should have been " ? Wiser heads than mine,

143

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

at any rate. For even to-day, when most veils have
been torn asunder, when I know that my mother will-
ingly misdirected and ruined my life, and became as
surely Alban's murderess as if she had killed him with
her own hand, I do not feel that I am in a position to
judge.

A year later I was present at a state ball in the Salle
des Palmiers in St. Petersburg. Never before had I
felt so burdened with uneasiness and forebodings. Yet
no night had ever quite equalled this one for me, as far
as social triumphs are concerned. Outside the world was
white, for it was the beginning of the cruel Northern win-
ter. Across one-half the heavens there was outspread
the glory of the aurora borealis. And as we sat at
supper in a veritable bower of flowers and verdure the
rosy glow of this choicest and most fairy-like of all
nature's phenomena shimmered through the lace of the
window curtains. I shall never forget that night, for
it was then that I heard of his death — a death met on
the battle-field in the burning sand of the Algerian des-
ert, just like the one dealt to that other man so dear to
me, Charles, Comte d'A.

I received one letter from his father — only one, thank
God! A harsh, bitter, unrelenting letter, and cruelly
unjust, too. But he did not know, poor broken-hearted
man, that my share in all this was only one of inexpe-
rience and ignorance.

" Alban is dead. He died, as they tell me, the death
of a soldier/' wrote the relentless father; "but I know
better than that! Before the world you may be wholly
blameless, but yet it is you who killed him. Indirectly,
even directly in a manner, you were the cause of his
leaving country, family, home, to seek release from the
pain which he was not brave enough to live down. I
feel that his blood is upon your hands. He sought

J44

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

death and he found it from an enemy's sword — or other-
wise, on your account I"

Exaggerated as this accusation was, it hurt me as
much as if it had all been true, but I never tried to clear
myself in the eyes of the bereaved, hard old man, & quoi
bon !

Who deserved most pity, I thought at times — Alban
or I?

"Oh! no, that is not death which death we call
When on the coffin clods of earth do fall ;
That is not death, when o'er us shadows creep
And, mouldering, we are laid in endless sleep,
Nor call that death, when for us others shed
True tears or false, over our narrow beds.
Ah ! that is death, and that is death alone,
When we our own existence do bemoan!"

CHAPTER IX

" Flower, white daughter of the day-spring fair,
The dew's sweet pensioner, ere rise of sun
By some rude hand and careless, all fordone —
Flung bruised and broken in the highway there 1"

" YOU are a stranger child than even I thought. You
have no adaptability, no monde. You look scornful
and unsympathetic excepting where animals and beg-
gars are concerned. You make me ashamed of you
• — you are such a dreamer, such an idealist, and so
very illogical withal! Je desespere de vous complete-
ment, ma ch&re! Vous etes stupide, et vous le faites
expres!"

My mother yawned daintily, rose from her chair,
and glided towards a long side-table upon which were
heaped numberless wedding-gifts which she gazed at
approvingly.

" You are neither gracious nor graceful. Sometimes
you are, I might say, downright ungainly. Yet grace
is what a woman needs most of all. It is one of the
few qualities I pride myself upon possessing, but, alas !
one cannot say of us, Mater pulchra, filia pulchrior I"

I glanced at my mother, at her queenly figure, with
grace noticeable in every movement, and yet a sort of
disgust filled my heart. "Honor thy father and thy
mother" — the old, old law. How easy it had been,
and was still, and how natural to honor my father, to
whom honor of the highest kind was always due! But
my mother — !

146

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

A shudder ran through me, and involuntarily I thought
that she was selfish and cruel beyond words.

Her merciless, melodious voice broke upon the silence.

" There is a lacune somewhere about you, Marguerite.
I really have little reason for being proud of you. I had
hoped that the result of my teachings, actions and ex-
ample, would have a different effect. I have secured a
magnificent position for you — my first duty as a mother
—and if you are not content you are positively offending
Heaven."

" I am sorry to be so great a disappointment to you/'
I interrupted, unable to bear this any longer. "You
know perfectly well that I am not like other girls, that I
am like nobody else in fact. And if there be a lacune
in my nature, it is none of my own making. When
you separated me from Alban I think you destroyed all
my chances of real happiness and of true womanliness.
I loved him dearly, tenderly, absolutely — " She fairly
stamped her foot. " Hold your tongue," she exclaimed,
harshly; "are you mad? A baby like you, to talk of
love! Really, you are too ridiculous! Your heroics
do not become a great lady ! Alban, forsooth 1 What
next, indeed? A lad of twenty -one, with a miserable
pittance of a couple of hundred thousand francs' income
to sustain the glory of his marquisate, when he inherits
it, and who now is a subaltern in a cavalry regiment
with a hale and hearty father, and an elder brother
who will very probably outlive him and have many
children, just as in the fairy stories. So this insane
idea is still in your head, Madame la Vicomtesse I You
little idiot, mooning about with your Romeo from gar-
rison to garrison, ce tratneur de sabre, possessed of a
face like a cameo and of an allowance of ten thousand
francs to cut a figure with — Tons mes compliments I"

"That is enough, mother!" I said, with rising passion

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

in my voice, and, without giving her time to retaliate, I
ran out of her boudoir.

I went to my own room and locked the door. Then
throwing myself on the bed, I lay there for a long time,
face downwards, struggling with my feelings, which
were not enviable or pleasant.

A few hours later my maid came to dress me for the
dinner and soiree de control. I was to wear my first
long dress that night, a cloud of pale - pink moire silk
and gauze, with showers of apple-blossoms nestling
everywhere.

A sense of unreality had come upon me. My nerves
were tingling curiously, and my usually colorless face
was slightly flushed. Marie's eyes were red and
swollen with weeping, and this irritated me beyond
measure. Why should she cry over me? I disliked
always to be pitied. And why also should she pity
me? Why? Why? Why? As she braided my
long hair she hurt me once or twice, for her hands
were trembling. Nervous and exasperated, I cried,
"Be more careful, Marie; you are positively idiotic to-
night !" The words were hardly out of my mouth when
a stinging slap marked my cheek with four slender
white bars. My mother had entered unnoticed. She
was clad in all the glory of full court dress, and sparkled
with jewels from her head to the tips of her satin-shod
feet.

"Be good enough to beg Marie's pardon/' she
said, calmly. "To-morrow you will be your own
mistress, but to-day you are still under my control,
and I cannot permit my servants to be treated like
dogs."

Tears of mortification welled up in my eyes. I was
awfully fond of Marie and of all the other members of
the household. And though the indignity of the pun*

148

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

ishment was perhaps greater than the offence, still I felt
that it was deserved, and, moreover, my mother's strik-
ing— if I may be forgiven so execrable a pun — reproofs
were nothing new to me. Poor Marie, in her dismay,
burst into a fresh flood of tears, when I threw my arms
about her neck and kissed her, humbly begging her to
overlook my fortunately unusual and unseemly be-
havior. It was evident that she was filled with indig-
nation at being the involuntary cause of my humilia-
tion, and when my irate parent had taken herself and
her gorgeousness away, the faithful soul went down
on her knees and kissed my hands, wetting them with
her tears, and calling me Un pauvre petite ange mal-
tratte', une petite sainte, and goodness only knows what
other names of endearment which I was sorry I deserved
so little.

I sat through the banquet that night like one in a
dream, feeling all eyes upon me, but quite indifferent
even to the remarks made about my extreme pallor.
Karl was very attentive, yet he acted during the whole
trying ordeal with the tact and dignity which, when he
chose, he knew so well how to assume.

Tired out and still dazed by so much novelty, I finally
retired, was undressed, and went to bed with a sigh of
pleasure at being left alone at last. It was midnight,
and I was very sleepy. But as soon as I touched the
cool pillows I grew strangely wide-awake and lay
watching the moonbeams filtering through the tall
stained-glass windows, and pondering over Marie's last
words before leaving my room. " Mon pauvre petite
ange, c'est votre derniere nuit de tranquilite. Que Dieu
vous prenne en pitie," she had said while arranging the
coverlet over me.

Why should God, too, take pity on me? " Ma pauvre
vieille Bretonne/' I mused, "she is so very mysterious.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

We all are in Brittany. Dear Brittany, I wish I were
there now!"

And then I lay quite still, my eyes fixed on the tinted
moonbeams, my hands clasped, and my mind wander-
ing in a maze of future pleasures, including the pos-
session of all that position and wealth could bring
— superb horses, great jewels, and acres of glass-houses
filled with millions of flowers. I thought of Karl, too,
a great deal. He was singularly handsome; of that
there could be no doubt. And he was very fond of me ;
at least he seemed to take a peculiar delight in being
near me, and his eyes followed me everywhere with
a persistent, glittering, hungry look which must be, I
thought, the sign of a great love. Alban had never
looked at me like that. His gaze was soft and tender
and melting, but, of course, he was so much younger
— a mere boy. And now I must forget him, so my moth-
er had said. I must; and I could never, never see him
again. A little dry sob rose in my throat. I turned
violently over, buried my face in my unbound hair, and
after a long time went to sleep — the deep, dreamless
sleep of childhood.

On the next night our marriage was celebrated with
all the pomp and splendor that a brilliant court could
lend to such nuptials. The weight of my cloth-of -silver
manteau de cour and of my jewels made me feel faint.
The myriads of lights, the overpowering perfume of
exotics, the solemn roll of the organ, gave me a sensa-
tion of dizziness to which I had never before been sub-
ject. From beneath the drooping folds of my bridal
veil I glanced once or twice at Karl kneeling beside me on
his velvet prie-dieu. He looked strangely to his advan-
tage in his brilliant uniform. His face was unlike any I
had ever seen. To me it was full of mystery, and I was
always attracted by mystery. Ah! had I but known!

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

He interested me, moreover, with that subtlest of
flatteries, the appearance of an all-absorbing adoration,
extremely gratifying to a little thing who had been
so oft humiliated as myself.

Immediately after the ceremony we left for Italy,
stopping on the way at a wonderful castle built in
the middle of a clear blue lake — a lake which was flooded
with moonlight when we arrived, and looked like a
huge mirror, where the encircling trees and plants cast
lace-like shadows disturbed now and again by the state-
ly motions of some grand and imposing-looking snow-
white swans gliding easily and with singular dignity
on the calm bosom of the water. The whole picture
was like fairy-land.

The profound peace and serenity of that early autumn
night seemed to fall upon me like a' mantle, and I gazed
at the glistening lake rapturously, at the carved and
ivy-grown walls of the beautiful building whence a sub-
dued light of a soft roseate tint shone through rows of
mullioned casements. The pinnacles and towers and
the high steep roofs gleamed as if some magician's
cunning hand had modelled them from purest silver.
This was a place indeed where lovers could live out a
dream such as all lovers long to dream. But, alas for
poor Amorino, what a disappointment ! What sore dis-
tress ! What pathetic and rough awakening was to
be his portion, if he were really slumbering while await-
ing us under those verdure-wreathed eaves ! He was
to be rudely shaken, sent forever on a hurried, terrified
flight — as far as I was concerned at least — his tender
eyes ruefully filled with bitter tears.

As we passed through the ranks of bowing servants,
no foreboding of coming evil overshadowed my mind.
To me, marriage was nothing but a mystic union, and I
went to encounter my fate with as innocent a faith as if

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

I had merely undertaken a long pleasure trip around
a new world, with a delightfully devoted and affectionate
companion.

If any human creature made of flesh and blood can
ever be absolutely pure, I was then as pure as the un-
trodden snow of a mountain summit, in my absolute
ignorance of the dark passions of life and of their terrible
realities which le commun des mortels endeavor to glorify
by lending to them the very misleading denomination
of love.

There had not as yet been enough in Karl's caresses to
enlighten me as to the demands of this so-called love.
He had been to me a Prince Charming, courtly and def-
erential to the utmost degree. He had treated me like
some fragile and precious statuette which the slightest
touch might break and destroy. Figuratively speak-
ing, as well as otherwise, he had knelt at my feet, and
the sensation was a very charming and novel one to
me, ou je ne voyais pas malice !

When we were left alone he kissed my hands with as
much ceremony as if twenty people had been present.
I smiled up at him and then at the great room where we
stood. The latter had preserved in all its integrity the
charm and splendor of by -gone days, with its cedar
walls and ceiling, embossed and gilded and painted,
its pale satin hangings and deeply embayed windows.
Masses of camellias, azaleas, and orange blossoms
had been brought there to make the whole place bloom
like an Oriental garden, and on the porphyry hearth a
fire burned gayly, adding its warmth and brilliancy to
the whole perfect mise en scene. On a small table lay a
dainty supper, the dishes and plates and flagons nestling
among marguerites and faintly tinted roses.

"Are you hungry, my lady love?" said Karl, half
seriously, half mockingly, snatching up a napkin and

152

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

tucking it under his arm in regulation-waiter fashion.
"I am but the humblest of your servants, and would
fain serve you even as a slave does his august and
revered mistress. It is for you to command, for me
to obey."

I laughed, a merry, careless laugh, crinkling up my
eyes in sheer fun, and making a little mischievous gri-
mace. "C'est bien, monseigneur," I rejoined, " mettons-
nous & table, esclave et maitresse, dans une touchante
egalite ; venez."

He bent his blue eyes upon me, perplexed, no doubt,
and vaguely astonished at such unconquerable guile-
lessness and stupidity on my part. Then his regard
acquired an eloquence both fiery and impatient; it be-
came dull and fierce and sullen, and suddenly the feel-
ing came over me that some horrible and unexpected
abyss yawned at my feet. My pulses fluttered strange-
ly, and I drew instinctively back with a sensation of
unnerving fear and terror, of which I was instantly
ashamed.

With much contrition, I laid my hand on his arm and
murmured, "Are you angry? What have I done to
vex you?"

"Nothing," he replied, nervously, plucking at his
long, fair mustache. "Nothing, my dear; how could
you anger me?"

The chilly sensation increased; I turned from the
table and looked abstractedly into the leaping flames.

"You are tired," murmured Karl, "I will call your
women. Au revoir /" and brusquely he left me.

I seemed turned to stone. I did not heed the rapid
process of being undressed. My customary cold bath
revived me a little, but I thrilled through all my nerves
and looked about me as if the great chamber where my
attendants left me alone was haunted.

153

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

As on the previous night, the moonbeams streamed in
through lofty painted casements. The pink light of a
night-lamp fell on my snowy bridal bouquet, and I felt
lost in the immense bed, with its heavy brocade canopy,
its perfumed sheets and lace-covered pillows.

I sat up, my long batiste garment fastened at the
throat by a knot of orange buds, falling around me like
a shroud. I pushed my braids back by a familiar gest-
ure and listened. The waters of the lake below the
windows lazily lapping the base of the castle, the mur-
mur of the gentle breeze in the foliage — that was all
I heard. Then the door was softly pushed open and
Karl entered.

"What is it?" I cried— "what has happened?"

He smiled a reassuring smile and quietly came tow-
ards me.

"I have come to bid you good-night, my little wife/'
he said, in a queer, vibrating voice that was new to me.
" I am your husband now. I have a right to love you,
and to tell you so."

I remained mute. My heart was beating to suffoca-
tion, and I would have given everything I possessed to
run away.

"I do love you, and you are mine!" he exclaimed,
and, with a savage gesture of triumph, he took me in
his arms.

Marriages are made in heaven! Marriage is a sacred
institution, a holy bond. God save the mark !

And what about a childhood perished in a night?
What of an innocence killed and buried forevermore?
Is that also heaven made, preordered, praiseworthy?

The sin of my mother against me rankled in my heart.
Why had she not warned me? why had she allowed me
to be thus sold in bondage, blindly and not knowing
what I did?

i54

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Too proud to complain, too astounded, too debased in
my own eyes to seek even the comfort of religion, I fought
alone and silently, with my repulsion, my disgust, my
unvanquishable fear, my pain, and my disillusion,
looking back wistfully to the past, looking forward
hopelessly to the future. My heart had surely turned
to marble, and yet there was life enough left in it for me
to hate Karl with a furious, all-absorbing hatred — to
despise all men and to abhor all women. And, God of
mercy 1 I was as yet but fifteen and three months! I
had a horror of myself, too, yet I could not escape from
myself. Amid the to me loathsome magnificence that
surrounded me I yearned for the peaceful, hazy shores
of Brittany, for the fresh, pure, clean existence which
was lost to me forever now. I never wept nor wailed ;
but the violent coloring, the penetrating perfumes, the
noble sights of Italy nauseated me, and the whole world
seemed to have become a shameful Inferno. I was a
child no more ! I had become an embittered, sorrowing
woman, and, like Mignon, I longed for my lost child-
hood and my own land.

" Ah ! commes les vieux airs qu'on chantait a douze ans
Frappent droit dans le coeur aux heures de souff ranee!
Comme ils deVorent tout, comme on se sent loin d'euxl
Comme on baisse la t£te en les trouvant si vieux!
Sont-ce 1£ tes soupirs, noir esprit des ruines?
Ange des souvenirs, sont-ce 1£ tes sanglots?
Ah ! comme ils voltigeaient, f rais et lagers oiseaux
Sur le palais dore" des amours enfantinesl
Comme ils savent rouvrir les fleurs des temps passes,
Et nous ensevelir, eux qui nous ont heroes J"

CHAPTER X

"Des Lebens Mai bliiht einmal und nicht wieder;

Mir hat er abgebliiht.

Der stille Gott — 0 weinet, meine Briider —
Der stille Gott taucht meine Fackel nieder,
Und die Erscheinung flieht."

"Auch ich war in Arkadien geboren,
Doch Thranen gab der kurze Lenz mir nur."

A GIRL of sixteen, on an uncommonly hot-looking
thoroughbred, struggling violently and flinging his
dainty, lean head about viciously, in emphatic pro-
test. A large green lawn, velvety and smooth, exhib-
iting a number of high and well-made jumps, hurdles,
doubles, banks, and a couple of forbidding stone walls.
A frosty autumnal sky, blue like a dead turquoise, and
in the middle distance a belt of russet and gold-hued
trees, with here and there a blotch of scarlet-leaved
bushes.

Six months before, that slender, pale-faced rider had
thought life a very acceptable thing ; now life was of no
more interest to her than had she been a hundred! A
repugnance and a depression which nothing could al-
lay weighed her down, and she only felt at ease when
out in the open with her dogs and horses. This girl-
rider had once been merry little Pierrot, then happy-go-
lucky Marguerite, and now she was Muzzi, for so all
her world called her, by a sweet-sounding foreign cor-
ruption of her flower-name, a sobriquet invented by her
new friends, her new family, her new country!

156

MUZZI IN HER FAVORITE GARB

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

To myself I seemed so changed that in Muzzi noth-
ing of my old self subsisted. My existence had become
a ceaseless pageant, a continual round of pleasures,
but the main-spring thereof was broken.

The steeple-chaser I was riding that morning gave
me much trouble. He snatched and tore at his bit and
moved round and round, and up and down, as if he were
stepping on burning coals during the pauses between
jumping. A treacherous fellow was "The Chief/' and
one of the stone walls in particular he absolutely ob-
jected to. I wheeled him sharply about, and, bending
forward, gave him a slap with my open, ungloved hand
on the side of the head. Quick as lightning he tore
across the grass, but just in front of the detested ob-
stacle he stopped dead short, and slewed around at the
very instant when he should have jumped.

"Ah, ha! Is that the way with you, you devil?" I
exclaimed, thoroughly out of temper now, and trotting
him back into the middle of the lawn. I seldom lost
patience with my horses, but "The Chief's" behavior
was sometimes outrageous, and I was determined to
give him a lesson and reduce him to terms. Again
the supple, recalcitrant steeple-chaser avoided the leap
with extraordinary agility, and it seemed a miracle to
me that I did not go over his head. " You want a first-
class thrashing, my lad!" I muttered, savagely, and
for the first time I prepared to use the short, heavy whip
I carried. As I brought it down upon the bay's shining
flank he stood still for a second or two, trembling with
amazement ; then he reared straight on end, in a man-
ner that was horrible to feel, twisted himself around,
and bolted.

Away and away up the grass-covered ground he
sped like a demon, the wind whistling past my ears
and taking my breath away.

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

" He has too much spirit to stand being thrashed like
a mule/' I thought to myself, and, in spite of my an-
noyance, I was proud of the beautiful, untamed creature
I rode. But obey he must, so I soon succeeded in stop-
ping him, and brought him back to the stone wall. I
settled my reins, squared myself, and triumphantly
landed " The Chief " on the other side.

" Well done, little girlie, well done, that was masterly,
and Ertek en ahhoz !" (I am a judge of it).

I looked up, wondering, and found that the clear,
silvery voice was that of the Empress, who, having
ridden up noiselessly on the turf, had witnessed, unbe-
known to myself, the last part of my fight with "The
Chief."

" Ez nagyon tuzer Id" (this is a very high-spirited
horse), I said, laughing a little, well pleased with such
praise, "but he is not really bad. Nezze csak, hogy
hegyezi fuleit" (just look how he pricks up his ears);
"''he understands every word one says/'

It was her turn to laugh. " Get off, little one. I am
going to have a try myself/' she added, slipping from
her saddle with that inimitable and exquisite grace of
movement which was all her own.

"Oh, don't, please," I cried, impulsively; "he is
dangerous sometimes, and what a thousand shames it
would be if he were to mangle you!"

" How about yourself, then, Muzzi? Would it not be
a shame, too?" she remarked, tentatively, laying her
narrow, slightly tanned hand on " The Chief's " mane.

"I would be glad if he did," I said, impulsively.

The Empress looked at me, wistfully, but she said
nothing, and with a shrug of my shoulders I jumped
down, and held out my hand for the reins of the superb
hunter from which she had just dismounted.

A boundless and solid affection had arisen between

158

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

my sovereign and myself, despite the difference in our
years. We were friends & la vie et & la mort, as was
proved, after all is said and done. She alone had
guessed, although I had never spoken a word to her, or
to any one else, of course, about the matter, that my
marriage was a failure in the full sense of the word.

While our two horses amicably rubbed noses, we
stood side by side between them. Suddenly, with an
impulse of tenderness, the Empress looked into my
eyes, and murmured softly :

" Chere, ne dites pas cela — you have a fond, tender
heart; do not misrepresent yourself; all will come
right sooner or later/'

Her eyes were dim, and her hand pressed mine with
a genuine sympathy which hurt me sorely, for my
heart-wound could not bear probing. I turned petu-
lantly away, gazing at the morning mist which still
veiled the landscape. "You are so piteously young
to feel as you do," she continued; "you will live to be
Consoled."

"Perhaps I am wicked," I replied, almost angrily,
"but I would sooner not wish to hear you speak like
that Megszolitas — forgive me if I am rude." She gave
a little weary sigh, and, with a quick bound, launched
herself upon " The Chief's" back.

The bay gave one wild leap forward, like a stag, and
was off. Frightened at the danger she ran, although
I knew her to be the finest and most perfect horsewoman
that ever was, I lengthened the left stirrup of her horse,
vaulted in the saddle, and followed her. With admir-
able ease she set him going, and flew a big double as
if horse and rider were sustained by wings. But when
the bay came to the stone wall, thoroughly realizing
that he had changed hands, he resumed his former
defences and prowesses, and a singularly pretty piece

TPIE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

of horsewomanship ensued, which, nevertheless, kept
my heart in my throat all the time.

At last the twice- conquered animal was brought to
the wall by the Empress at a steady, sensible canter.
Gradually increasing his pace, he soared over the solid,
perilous mass and performed this feat to a close without
a sign of revolt; only a slight shiver of his satin skin
betrayed the fact that he was irritated and ashamed
at having yielded.

I could not help gazing admiringly at my companion,
as we rode off together, followed by our grooms, who
had been waiting at the entrance to the lawn. How
young she looked! There was an unwonted color in
her cheek and a triumphant light in her eyes. How
imperially she held her slender figure ; what an expres-
sion of matchless refinement and dignity sat upon those
perfectly chiselled features, and what a contrast she
was to all other women! Those beautiful eyes, how
rarely they smiled, but how well a smile became them!
What an interesting personality was hers! Never be-
fore, never since have I met anybody like her. Oh,
my Empress, my darling, why did I ever lose you?
After many years this same bitter, unutterably bitter,
question rises to my lips. I cannot resist looking back
with anguish unfathomable to those days which will
never fade from my mental vision. In all my life I have
cared for very few; I could count them on the fingers of
both hands and leave out the thumbs ; but she I adored
for her goodness, her pluck, her purity, her nobility of
thought and of deed, and beyond the grave I adore her
still. My patron-saint — for a saint she always was — now

and forever I

" F61icit6 passed,
Qui ne pent revenir,
Tourment de ma pens6e,

Que n'ay-je, en te perdant, perdu le souvenir."
160

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

I was constantly with her, in person or in thought.
She moulded me, strengthened my whole nature, culti-
vated the little good that there was in me. Her sor-
rmvs were my sorrows; her few joys my greatest rapt-
ures. Devoted as I was, heart and soul to her, I would
have scorned the very idea of doing anything of which
she might disapprove. The standard she set me was a
high one, but just because she set it, I tried with the
highest incentive in the world to attain it, although I
never quite succeeded in so doing, and am still striving
in vain

We both loved the sea, the mountains, and the coun-
try, and were never content when in towns, however
enviable our dwelling-places might be. Even the
Riviera was too alambiquee, too cloyed with sweetness,
too thickly populated, and too artificial to suit us. Corfu,
with its terraced rocks, luxuriant and picturesque,
planted all over with flowering trees and silvery olives,
was, on the other hand, a paradise we both enjoyed to
the uttermost. It was delightful to follow the narrow,
zig-zag paths winding up through the endless orchards
of orange, lemon, and almond trees, starred all over with
their white and pink blossoms; to mount the rocky
roads lined with moss-grown stones, in the crevices of
which tiny flowerets grew in generous profusion ; to push
our way through the labyrinth of interlaced branches,
followed by our dogs, and carrying our sketching ma-
terials. Often there were ledges of rock which had to
be jumped over, but we were both too athletic to let such
obstacles trouble us, and were well rewarded when,
reaching the summit, we gazed upon the indefinite
hazy horizon, the deep blue sea, studded with reddish-
brown sails, and the far-away coast stretching into
endless realms of sparkling light and violet shadows.

We were interested in everything and everybody;
L 161

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

in the boat-builders, the fisher-folk, the flower-venders,
the orange-growers, and the very, very poor, who roost-
ed high up on the rose-hued, mica-crusted rocks, in tiny
wooden cabins, overshadowed by pale cactus-spikes,
and surrounded by waves of fragrant sea-pinks.

The red-hot light of the African sun, the orange
sands of the desert, the white, sloping town of Algiers,
backed by the dark-needled Italian pines, piercing the
transparent air with their sharp, shaggy heads, were
also favorites of ours. The distant scarps of the
brown Kabyl Mountains were as familiar to us as the
Alps, the Pyre'ne'es, or the proud Tyrolean ranges.
For we were wanderers whenever we could shake our-
selves free from court etiquette and court glitter, and
we thanked fate ardently when it became possible for
us to leave everything behind in our unhampered flights
from civilization.

Well versed in all the ins and outs of Oriental life,
the Empress undertook to initiate me to the mysteries
of the East, and she acquitted herself admirably of
her self-imposed task. Midnight rides in the desert,
visits to old palaces hidden away in narrow, dusky
streets, and hunting - parties on the reed - grown
shores of the gulf, were only a few of the excursions
which she planned out for my benefit. She was indeed
an invaluable guide for any one who, like myself, was
anxious to penetrate beneath the surface of what is
commonly called La poesie de I' Orient — a romantic
glamour which any tourist well provided with money
can enjoy. No ; her knowledge went far deeper than that,
for she had made a very careful and extensive study
of the land which once was the home of Hannibal, and
I enthusiastically followed her wherever she chose to
lead me.

The Orient! How much is contained in those two
' 162

TO MANY A SPHVNX?

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

words I What tragedy, what poetry, what secret and
potent charm they reveal! When once assimilated it
must always haunt the mind. It prostrates one with
wonder and awe. Like the call of the crested hopoe, or the
" Ah-ah! Ay-ah!" of the Egyptian donkey-boy, it seems
to ring forever in one's ears. In spite of all that may be
said to the contrary, in spite of European rule, in spite
of the persistent efforts of modernists to invade it, the
East is still the East, and will always remain so — a
wonderful land, rich in beauty, in interest, and, alas!
in many sombre, shameful deeds. How painfully sur-
prised I was when I discovered the depth of human
suffering and torture concealed beneath the fair exte-
rior of this grand continent — luminous, romantic Africa !

I shudder when I remember one incident recounted
to me on a gala night at Gezireh, when the Khedive
of Egypt threw open his marvellous palace to hundreds
of guests.

The lace-like structure of the snowy buildings was a
veritable glimpse into fairy-land. They stood among
groves of feathery palms, bamboos, mimosa, and banana
plants, the immense green leaves of which towered
above a majestic sweep of shaven imported turf adorned
by tall jets d'eau, gorgeous masses of tropical plants,
parterres flaming with all the hues of the rainbow, and
borders of incomparably fine gloxinias, dwarf gardenias,
and crimson pourpier.

Gigantic ferns clustered beneath the deep shade of
some scaly Himalayan pines, while from the carved
porticos garlands of passion - flowers and tea - roses
drooped in graceful festoons.

The Khedive could assume, when he considered it
worth his while to do so, the aspect of a perfect Grand
Seigneur, and he certainly possessed the difficult art of
knowing how to receive. Taste and money combined

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

to make those celebrated Gezireh receptions an enchant-
ment : the music was perfect, the refreshments delicious,
and the suppers of Lucullan magnificence, while the
gay uniforms and jewelled toilettes of the viceroy's nu-
) iierous invites completed a mise en scene of unimpeach-
able splendid Oriental magnificence.

The night to which I refer was one of star-and-moon-
lit beauty. No pen could ever hope to describe or brush
to reproduce the royal blue of the skies — not the dark-
black hue we are accustomed to in Europe, but a lumi-
nous transparency unequalled for its soft brilliance.
The rapid waters of the Nile murmured and gurgled
musically beneath the flower-laden balustrades of the
marble terraces, and the splash of the fountains fell
melodiously upon the ears. I had just been dancing,
and, tempted by the cool, dusky gardens, I accepted the
arm of a celebrated diplomat, who begged me to go for
a short stroll before the beginning of the cotillion.

For a few moments we stood on the steps of the palace,
gazing back at the wonderful pageant presented by the
ballroom. The walls were concealed by silken draper-
ies, embroidered in gold, silver, and seed pearls, and
the groups of dancers looked almost unreal and like
personages in a dream picture.

"Why does Mustapha Pacha F. always wear a
glove on his right hand? It is contrary to etiquette
here, is it not?" I asked of my escort.

" If he were to remove it," replied his Excellency, " you
would perceive an ugly semicircular scar on the back
of his hand. Let us go into the gardens, and I will tell
you under what peculiar circumstances he received this
wound, the traces of which he is so anxious to hide."

Filled with curiosity, I wandered out into the fresh
night air with my old friend, and listened with eager
interest to the following tale of sinister and grim cruelty :

164

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

"In 1876," bc^an the ambassador, "the English
government, alarmed at the Khedive's terrible extrava-
gance and repeated appeals to the European money
markets, sent out to Egypt a special commission, con-
sisting of the Right Honorable Sir S. C, and sev-
eral others, to inquire into the financial status of
the country. These gentlemen, although received
with flattering hospitality and courtesy, experienced
the greatest difficulty in obtaining the information they
desired. In the short space of ten years over £100,000,-
ooo sterling had been borrowed by the Egyptian gov-
ernment, and of this immense sum only a ridiculously
small portion had found its way into the state treasury.
What had become of the balance? Two people alone
could tell. One of these was the Khedive himself, and
the other his Minister of Finance, Mustapha Pacha
S., the most powerful man in Egypt. It is impos-
sible to conceive the enormous wealth of the latter.
Large tracts of country belonged to him, and he had
the right of coining money in his own name. His
splendor and magnificence were unequalled in the East.
His harem of over three thousand women occupied the
immense palaces in which all the government offices
are now located, and he had a special body-guard in his
seraglio of over four hundred superb Amazons, who, on
state occasions, donned armor and helmets of pure sil-
ver. A member of almost every European order of
knighthood, he was on terms of intimate acquaintance
with all the principal statesmen in Paris, London, Berlin,
and Vienna. The English envoys accordingly devoted
all their energies to win him over from the then Khedive
in order that they might be able at last to sound the
puzzling depths of Egj'ptian finance. It seems that they
were about to succeed, when, late one Thursday night
in the month of June, a carriage stopped at one of the

105

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

side entrances of Abdeen Palace. A short, stout gen-
tleman, with a very pronounced Jewish type of coun-
tenance, jumped out, and, limping rapidly up the stairs,
demanded to see his Highness at once. The Khedive,
on being informed that his visitor was Mr. Julius B.'s
confidential secretary and factotum of the Minister of
Finance, ordered him to be admitted immediately.
After kissing the hem of the monarch's coat in the cus-
tomary fashion, the secretary informed the Khedive
that the minister had been won over by the English
envoys, and in order to save his own position had de-
termined to turn king's evidence, and to reveal to them
on the following Saturday the whole of his Highness 's
financial transactions. The latter, fully aware that
such disclosures would inevitably result in his depo-
sition, determined at once to prevent at all costs their
being divulged. The next day was Friday, the Mo-
hammedan Sabbath. After performing his devotions
at the mosque with exemplary piety, the Khedive pro-
ceeded in an open victoria to the palace of Mustapha
Pacha S., and invited that minister to accompany
him during his usual afternoon drive. As this was
by no means the first occasion on which his Highness
had thus honored him, the minister had no reason to
be surprised, and, pleasantly chatting together, the
Khedive and Mustapha Pacha S. drove to this very
palace of Gezireh where we are now. On alighting at
the door, the Khedive, turning to his minister, invited
him to supper on board the vice-regal yacht, which
lay moored in midstream, and suggested that Mustapha
Pacha S. should go on board immediately with the
Princes Hussein and Hassan, saying that he himself
would follow as soon as he had taken a bath.

" The minister, therefore, accompanied by the Khe-
dive's sons, embarked at these very steps you see here

166

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

at your feet, and was rowed off to the yacht. A merry
evening was spent on board, the whole ship being il-
luminated, and occasional snatches of music and laugh-
ter were wafted over to the shore. At about eleven
o'clock the Khedive and both princes returned alone,
leaving on board the minister with the two vice-regal
chamberlains, Mustapha Bey F. and Sami Bey B.
Shortly afterwards the noise of a brief scuffle on deck
was heard by the people on the bank of the river, and
then all was quiet and the lights were extinguished
on board. Soon after midnight the yacht cast loose
from her moorings, and noiselessly glided up the stream
towards the first cataract.

" Nothing more was ever seen in this world of Mus-
tapha Pacha S.

" On the next day a decree was issued stating that the
Khedive had banished his Minister of Finance to Upper
Egypt, for having dared to oppress his much-beloved
subjects, etc. Four days later the yacht returned to
her moorings off Gezireh Palace, and when the two
chamberlains resumed their service it was noticed that
Sami Bey wore a handkerchief round his throat as
if to hide some wound on his neck, and that Musta-
pha Bey F. had his right hand in a sling. Nothing,
however, can long be kept a secret in the East, and
it soon oozed out that Sami's throat had been lacerated
by the nails, and Mustapha 's hand had been bitten
through by the teeth, of the unfortunate Minister of
Finance, when they strangled him with their own hands
on the night of the supper. Both Sami and Mustapha
were rewarded for their services by being made pachas.
Sami, who became Prime Minister at the time of Arabi's
insurrection, was later on sent to Ceylon, while his com-
panion, Mustapha, after being engaged to an English
lady, who broke off the marriage when she heard the

167

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

history of his hand, became a cabinet minister. Julius
B., the private secretary, a German Jew who be-
trayed his benefactor and master, was naturally also
rewarded by being made a pacha, and by becoming
Under-Secretary of State in the department of which
Mustapha was minister. "

After listening to this narration, I returned to the
salons, a sadder and a wiser woman. The wondrous
charm of the evening had been broken by what I had
just heard, and I soon took my departure from the place
which had witnessed so grewsome a deed, and probably
many others of the same distasteful nature. I did not
feel like dancing any more, for the sweet strains of the
music could not prevent me from fancying that I heard
on the night breezes the agonized cries of poor Mus-
tapha Pacha.

CHAPTER XI

" Now are the autumn days. The sunrise is less bright ;
Far from their nests the birds have takei^Tlight;
Happy is he who flies with loved ones dear;
But one is sorrowful, left lonely here,
All lonely here!"

IN September Karl was ordered to take charge of a
brigade of cavalry, as honorary commander, during
the great autumn manoeuvres on the northern frontier,
and " my chum " Rudi soon joined us in his character of
honorary colonel of the regiment of lancers garrisoned
there. Our friends said good-bye as if we were march-
ing off to the field of battle, and I took a sad farewell
from my beloved Empress before abandoning my com-
fortable and beautiful home.

A few days later we reached our station on the border
of the great plains. There the country is flat and mel-
ancholy, with now and again a cluster of stunted willow
or birch trees, some great forests, and many a stream of
running water bubbling through the tall grasses. No
one, however, who has ever seen it can deny the gran-
deur of those boundless vistas of prairies, with the undu-
lating range of the mountains in the dim distance, and
the little villages, with their blue and pink cottages
dotting the landscape with many bright spots. But in
winter the desolation of the place is really heartrending,
and to remain for six months in the snow, badly pro-
tected from the elements as we were, was far from being
a cheerful prospect. The nearest railway station was

169

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

nine hours distant, and the greatest diversions we had
were hunting, driving, and riding.

There are few places about which the world at large
knows as little as of that far eastern portion of Europe,
with its startling contrasts between the abject poverty
of the peasantry on the one hand, and on the other a
wealth in which barbaric and mediaeval magnificence
are often strangely blended with the quintessence of
nineteenth century civilization and refinement. It is
out of the beaten track of the tourist, and is unknown,
save to the guests who throng the castles of the great
nobles during the hunting season, and to the officers of
the army.

To the latter in particular it is a spot of more than
ordinary interest, for it has long been recognized by
military authorities as certain to become, one day or
other, the principal field of operations in the event of
war between three empires. Large bodies of troops are
continually maintained in the surrounding districts by
these three great powers, for frontiers are close at hand,
and, indeed, there is one spot where the outposts of the
three countries are all within sight and hail of one an-
other, being only separated by wooden barriers painted
in the colors of each respective nation.

Frontier duty is regarded by officers as being one of
the most disagreeable features of the service, and thus
do the majority of officers' wives decide to remain be-
hind in the gay capital, at any rate, until the winter
is over. Princess T., the wife of Major Prince T.,
of the — th Lancers, and myself, were the only two
women who happened to be, therefore, as we called it
flippantly, "on active service/'

Our station was a small and miserable village, a few
miles distant from the foot of the mountain ranges, and
lay in one of the most desolate parts of a desolate coun-

170

I

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

try, with hamlets lew and far between, surrounded by
swamps of reedy wilderness and great sandy stretches
dotted with meagre trees. It was a colorless and mourn-
ful place, and when we arrived the first touch of cold
weather was making the distant forests bare, and cover-
ing the plains with a continual shiver of breeze among
dying grasses and fading heather.

The distance was a nine-hours' drive, as I have just
remarked, and over execrable roads, from the nearest
railway station, to the little village which appeared to
us to be on the very confines of the earth. To make
things worse, the wretched place did not possess a sin-
gle decent inn, and the cavalry barracks were in so
neglected a condition that it was impossible to take up
our quarters there.

We hired a long, low, rambling kind of wooden struct-
ure, which could hardly be called a house, so primitive
was the fashion in which it was built. It contained
twenty large, bare rooms, with crumbling pine walls,
provided with narrow windows, and doors which would
neither open nor shut. The flooring was rude in the
extreme, for it consisted of nothing more than beaten
earth, damp, evil-smelling, and cold.

A chill like that of the catacombs fell upon me when I
first entered this dismal abode, and a feeling almost akin
to discouragement crept into my heart when I thought
of my many beautiful residences with all their treasures
of art, and their numberless conveniences. Nevertheless,
I quickly realized that faint-heartedness would not help
me much, and summoning a force of regimental carpen-
ters to my assistance, I was soon hard at work making
the place habitable. I must confess that it took me a long
time to accomplish this, but three weeks later, notwith-
standing, nobody would have known it for the orig-
inal dwelling. The rough floor was covered with deal

171

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

boards over which thick carpets were spread, Eastern
hangings hid the dingy walls from view, and many
good pictures, bric-a-brac, and trophies of arms bright-
ened the rooms, while Egyptian divans, piled with softly
tinted cushions, gave a homelike appearance to this
house which on our arrival was so graceless and barn-
like.

When the absorbing excitement of arranging, unpack-
ing, hanging pictures, nailing draperies, and procuring
palms, ferns, and flowering plants, as an indispensable
adjunct, had subsided, I began to see what a lonely spot
it was that we were doomed to inhabit for a compara-
tively long space of time ; an absolute solitude, with an
unchanging melancholy about it. The estates of the
nobles were, of course, a great resource, but the dis-
tances seemed interminable, and made it difficult for
us to be on very neighborly terms, especially after the
winter set in in good earnest, when the nights became
terribly wild, and the howl of the hurricane and of the
hungry wolves combined to make up a really horrible
concert.

How very much out of place did the delicate, elegant,
and frail Princess T. look in this rough, uncivilized
spot, and yet without her sweet presence it would have
been a thousand times more unbearable. Her charming
ways and her blond beauty seemed to bring light and
cheer to everybody, and the young officers, who were,
of course, deprived even of the questionable amusements
to be found at a military casino, grew in the habit of
coming to see either the princess or myself every even-
ing, when we would play whist, or sit and chat around
a bright fire of fragrant pine logs, often listening to
some dreamy melody of Chopin, played by Captain
Count G., who was a wonderful musician.

My childhood training now stood me in good stead

172

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

and service, for I enjoyed out-door pleasures more than
ever, and feared neither wind nor weather.

In my leisure hours I took particular pleasure in train-
ing a young pig which I had bought from a peasant.
The animal was very intelligent, and I taught him not
only all the tricks of the circus, but also to smoke a pipe
and play dominoes. He was a great source of amuse-
ment to us, and was ushered into the dining-room by my
butler every evening after dinner, with huge bows of
blue ribbon tied around his neck and tail. It is needless
to add that he was always politely invited to partake of
cake and fruit, which he invariably did with a very good
grace. Indeed, I was still enough of a child then to en-
joy such fun immensely.

Moreover, I had a great many quixotic ideas of my
own concerning the welfare of the people about me.
Their more than rudimentary ideas of cleanliness and
hygiene — nay, of common morals and decency — called
for a serious looking after. The conditions were ap-
palling ; the people were poor, of a poverty which wrings
the heart, and reminds one of " the abomination of deso-
lation" spoken of by the prophet Daniel 1 Their very
life's blood was sucked out vampire-like by the Hebrew
usurers : men with gaunt visages and shambling gait,
wrapped in long greasy kaftans reaching down to their
feet, and with mangy, fur-bordered caps upon their
filthy hair, which curled in twin corkscrews or peiches
drooping over their bloodless ears.

The village inns, low drinking places at best, were
invariably kept by Jews of this class, who enticed the
peasants by all the means in their power to consume as
much wodka as possible. When once they succeeded in
making their wretched victims run into debt, they
pounced like vultures upon them, forced them to mort-
gage their land, and little by little obtained such a hold

i73

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

on the poor devils that the latter became mere tools in
their hands, cowed by the perpetual fear of seeing their
fields go to the hammer.

I tried my best to make my way into the homes and the
hearts of these miserable people, but found the undertak-
ing almost impossible, so suspicious and disaffected had
they become. They seemed hard and thankless, stupe-
fied by drink, want of proper food and fair treatment,
and yet if once one gained their confidence they were
sometimes susceptible of showing genuine feeling and
even gratitude.

One day I got myself into a grand scrape, which very
nearly ended most disagreeably for me. I had gone
off alone on one of my riding expeditions, intending to
have a gallop before luncheon. The weather was un-
usually mild, and as I rode over the flat grass-land, en-
joying the crisp, bright air, I was quite unconscious of
the fact that unawares I had wandered over the frontier,
a thing which any of us had been strictly forbidden to
do. Before I noticed my mistake I was miles away from
home and far into foreign territory. I was just in the
act of retracing my steps when I heard the rapid pat-
ter of horses' hoofs and the blood-curdling whoops of
the Cossacks ringing on the frosty breeze. Looking up,
I espied a party of about fifty of these terrible gardes-
fronti&re galloping towrards me, with their lances glit-
tering in the sun, and their little horses' long, shaggy
manes fluttering in the wind.

Very much put out, I dug my spurs into the flanks of
my English hunter, " Will-o'-the-Wisp," and, wheeling
him around, I sped away at a break-neck pace, pursued
by the Cossacks in full cry. By this time I had been
long enough on the frontier to know what awaited me
should I be caught by this lawless tribe of half-savage
men, who were capable of any imaginable misconduct in a

174

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

case like this particular one. I urged my horse for-
ward with a touch of the spur that the noble beast hardly
needed, for he clearly seemed to understand that for
once he was being chased instead of chasing, and cov-
ered the ground with the swiftness of a hunted deer.

Meanwhile one of the Cossacks, evidently better mount-
ed than the others, was coming closer and closer upon
me ; with a few desperate strides his pony was beside me,
his hand was on my bridle rein, and " Will-o'- the- Wisp"
reared on his hind-legs, making frantic efforts to shake
him off. Fortunately, I carried a heavy, silver-headed
hunting-crop, and, swiftly raising my arm, I gave him
a blow across the eyes which sent him reeling from his
saddle to the ground.

Without looking behind me, I started off again, with
the now infuriated men at my heels, and I was just
on the point of being caught a second time when I
saw the river sparkling like a band of silver a hun-
dred yards in front of me. Then I knew that I was
saved. My hunter, excited as he was by this mad race,
could clear at a bound, I felt certain, the twenty-eight
feet or so of deep water which separated me from our
own territory, for at this place the boundary-line be-
tween the two countries is formed by this stream. I
also knew that the Cossack ponies, although active,
were in no condition to accomplish such a feat as this
leap was.

This narrow river, at best, was a dangerous obstacle,
but the take-off was sound, springy pasture; the land-
ing was more or less boggy, and very slippery. I settled
my reins and squared myself in a thorough business-
like way for the leap. I felt that it would be touch
and go, but at that instant I could have ridden the head
off the "Old One" himself. " Will-o'-the-Wisp " ap-
proached the water at a thundering pace, rose like a

175

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

bird over the steep bank and rushing water, and landed
on the other side as lightly as a feather. While in
the air, a sudden sensation of doubt assailed me —
would I succeed? would we clear the yawning gap?
The feeling of relief and exhilarating triumph which
followed the success of this supreme effort are inexpres-
sible. As I jumped from my saddle and allowed my
nervously shivering horse to stand at rest, I heard a yell
of disappointment from my pursuers. I could not help
even at that moment laughing aloud at their discom-
fiture, as they stood completely baffled on the opposite
margin of the river.

I need not add that when I reached home I was sound-
ly berated for my so-called imprudence and reckless-
ness.

The owners of the nearest castles, although the finan-
cial circumstances of many of them were much impaired,
were very hospitable. They bombarded us with in-
vitations to dinner, to luncheon, to supper, to hunts, and
to dances, with untiring constancy, and they really
did all within their power to make us comfortable and
merry while under their roofs. Comfort, however, is
seldom met with in those once so luxurious, now often
sadly impoverished country - seats — huge, rambling
structures, half fortress, half palace, where many rem-
nants of past grandeur accentuate the painful and
pathetic aspect of the present decay.

When you are invited to dinner there, you are treated
to costly wines and to all sorts of primeurs. Venison,
game, flesh, and fowl, weigh down the festive board,
which literally groans beneath its load of antique plate
and of rare Sevres and Dresden china. But should you
arrive at the chateau unawares, you might find the
family sitting before a tureen of barsch-soup (a mixture
of beet-roots and sour milk) and a dish of sausages and

176

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

red cabbage, for such is mainly their daily fare. When-
ever I chanced to stay over night at one of these resi-
dences I was conducted with great ceremony to the
state apartment, usually hung with moth-eaten tapes-
tries, and furnished in a gorgeous and lavish if much
tarnished splendor, the sole reminder of by-gone cen-
turies. But, alas, the sheets and pillow-cases were
worn thread -bare, and the towels on the toilet table
ready for use consisted of a lamentable collection of holes
and of a great embroidered crest and coronet in one
of the remaining corners.

Far from seeming ashamed of this melancholy state
of affairs, the lady of the house would smilingly tell me
that servants are not to be trusted, and that she had
been so preoccupied by her numerous social duties
that she had not been able to spare the necessary time
to examine her linen stores.

The negligence and carelessness of these great ladies
are almost past comprehension. More indolent than
any harem woman, they take their household duties
easily, carelessly, and consequently everything goes
wrong. They will dress magnificently when the occa-
sion requires it, but often go without the simplest neces-
saries of life.

Princess X., a celebrated beauty, used, quietly and
quite openly, to take her diamonds out of pawn before
the beginning of the Fasching (carnival season), and
send them back there with equal insouciance on the
first day of Lent. Everything is sacrificed in that quaint
region to the ambition of preserving ancient racial
traditions, and many, indeed, are the members of this
old aristocracy who willingly deprive themselves of
every delicacy and comfort during eight months out of
the year, in order to cut a figure befitting their rank
during the season.

M 177

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

The striking contrast between this gilded misery and
the truly princely abodes and status of some of the great
nobles, who have retained their pristine glory and wealth,
is full of pathos.

Among the most perfect residences in the whole of
Europe is Count Maurice P.'s magnificent castle, from
which we were only a few miles distant. It was built
by a long-dead French architect of immense talent;
its sculptured walls are mirrored in the transparent
waters of a lake, while the snow-capped mountains
rise behind dense woods at the back of its Versailles-
like gardens. It is one of the grandest places at which
it has been my happy lot to stay. It has acres of
palm and glass houses. In the stables one hundred
and twenty horses of the purest breeds of England,
France, Austria, and the Ukraine were lodged in mar-
ble loose-boxes, the straw of their bedding was plaited
like a Japanese matting, and the count's coat-of-arms
used to be designed in colored sands every morning by
the grooms upon the unique mosaic floor. In the centre
of the stable silvery jets of water played on masses of
arums and of lilies blossoming in the shell-shaped basin
of a fountain, and in the adjoining hall the horses could
enjoy their daily hot or cold baths like the daintiest
of coquettes.

There is a theatre between the banqueting-hall and
the winter garden, with a stage as large as that of the
Comedie Frangaise, and hundreds of halls and cham-
bers cluster around monumental staircases, up which
twenty-five men might walk abreast. Every nook and
corner of this magnificent house is filled with treasures
of art of priceless value, and the luxury displayed in
each detail of the service during my old friend's life-
time was absolutely unequalled in its completeness and
grandeur.

178

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

At a dinner given by the Count and Countess in our
honor, during Rudi's sojourn with us, the flowers in the
banquetinjr-hall alone represented a value of over £6uOO
sterling. The table-doth, of old Venetian point, was en-
tirely covered with white camellias, forming an indescrib-
ably lovely velvety mass, while the plates of jewelled
Sevres were each of them surrounded by a fragrant circle
of pale-pink roses. The middle and side pieces of the
surtout represented a stag-hunt, sumptuously wrought
and chased in pure gold. Long garlands of camellias
and rose-hued lilies drooped from the ceiling, forming
a sort of quaintly ideal tent over the table, and a tall
hedge of white and crimson azaleas raised their silky
blossoms against the diapered gold of the walls. Sixty
footmen with powdered heads, in white plush liveries
worked with silver, served the thirty guests under the
direction of three butlers and a major-domo. All the
women present were in court-dress with gemmed stom-
achers, tiaras, and diamond-encrusted orders glittering
beneath their fair shoulders. The men either wore
gala uniforms or the national costume of costly velvet,
fur, and jewels.

This dinner took place a few days after my adventure
with the Cossacks, and the general officer in command
of the various detachments of that corps on that por-
tion of the frontier was one of the guests of the evening.
At dessert he spoke of this ridiculous incident, not dream-
ing, of course, that the heroine thereof was sitting across
the table from him. He concluded his recital by saying,
with a hearty laugh: "My men were quite staggered
when they saw that pretty she-devil fly across the river
as if both herself and her marvellous steed were en-
dowed with wings. Had their wounded comrade not
showrn sorry proofs of her tangibility, I believe that to
their dying day they would think they had pursued a

179

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

spirit. I myself would give much to know who this
little imp of Satan was. "

Impelled by Heaven knows what unconquerable love
of mischief, I said, calmly and with becoming modesty :
"I was that imp, general!"

He stared helplessly at me, for my young face and
small, slender form were not in keeping with his precon-
ceived idea of a daring Amazon, galloping alone on
forbidden ground, and felling worthy Cossacks to the
earth with a blow from her mighty arm. Everybody
laughed until they cried, excepting Karl, who looked
daggers at me, and the poor general, who remained
silent and ill at ease for the rest of the evening, in spite
of my sincere and eager attempts to cheer him up, and
to make him forget his involuntary faux-pas and my
deviltry in placing him in so awkward a position

In the vast forests surrounding Count Maurice's
enormous domain, the bear, the wolf, and the wild
boar are hunted with all the splendor of royal hunts,
and the moon and torch-lit curves in the great cour
d'honneur at night are a sight not often seen in our
commonplace and prosaic times.

During the months I spent out there I was able to
thoroughly appreciate the startling contrast between
the rough daring life of the soldier, the misery of the
peasant, and of the impoverished aristocrat, the sordid-
ness and villany of the Jews, and the quasi-barbaric
luxury displayed by those nobles who, as I said already,
still possess immense fortunes. An interesting one
at any rate is this life on the frontier; and I finally grew
to like it, the bracing and violent exercises, the long
rides and drives, the hunts, and also the f$tes at the
many chateaux, where we were so cordially and eager-
ly welcomed.

During the whole of October and November we hunted

180

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

four times a week, and I was pleased at being nearly
always the first in at the death, and of obtaining the
foot or brush, although I was fast becoming a trifle
blasee on that score.

Many were the golden pheasants, red partridges, and
spotted snipes that fell victims to my gun, and in my
youthful exuberance I began to pride myself on what I
audaciously called my unerring aim.

In December we went wolf-hunting. One generally
waits to begin this fascinating kind of sport until the
season is sufficiently advanced to render the animals
furious with hunger and emboldened to give battle. We
used to start at ten or eleven o'clock on moonlit nights.
Four of our swiftest horses were put to the sleigh, the
management of which was confided to a remarkably
able driver. All depends on this personage during
these expeditions; if he lose his head or his grip on
the ribbons, and allows the frightened horses to run
away during the chase, one stands an excellent chance
of being thrown off the low vehicle and devoured by the
ravenous wolves. A bundle of straw is tied behind
the sleigh and allowed to drag in the snow as a bait.
A sucking-pig wrapped in a strong canvas bag is taken
along, and occasionally the poor little brute is pinched,
so that his dismal squeaks may attract the attention
of the wolves and make them start in hot pursuit on
the chance of a hearty supper.

When once started at full speed on the smooth white
hardened plain, one soon comes in sight of whole squad-
rons of wolves, their long, crouching gallop falling
noiselessly on the frozen snow, their emerald-green
eyes lighting up the silvery dusk of the night like myr-
iads of supernatural glow-lamps, their low, growling
bay sounding like distant subdued thunder of a peculiar-
ly sinister kind. As soon as they are near enough,

i8r

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

one pegs away at them with ball cartridges, and it is
not unusual to kill from one hundred to three hundred
animals in one night. I know of no excitement com-
pared to this, as one's life is continually hanging on a
thread, and the swiftness of the motion, coupled with
the delight of success when the fierce, ungainly beasts
fall one by one, victims to one's skill, is enough to stir
up the tamest blood.

The most passionate lovers of wolf-hunting whom
I have ever met were Count and Countess C. and
Count and Countess W.-D. Both these families pos-
sess fortunes of royal proportions, and belong to the
noblest stock in Russia. Indeed, of all the members
of the then Czar's court, the C.'s were the only
ones accepted by the sovereigns as personal friends
and relatives, and allowed the enjoyment of absolute
freedom from all etiquette when in the imperial presence.
Such personages have nothing to gain either financially
or in rank from the monarch's favor, and their utter
and whole-souled devotion to the crown is of a most
beautiful and disinterested nature.

Another enrage on the subject of wolf -hunting was
in those days Prince S., later Duke of B. This
amiable personage was an original, if ever there was
one, and the most litigious of all noblemen in the length
and breadth of the universe, for at one period of his ex-
traordinary career he managed to entangle himself in
an inextricable net of over sixty different lawsuits!
Indeed, if gratitude were a sentiment of which lawyers
were capable, the legal fraternity should long ere this
have erected a magnificent statue de reconnaissance to
him, for he has proved an absolute and inexhaustible
gold-mine to the profession.

But all this is quite beside the question, and I render
myself culpable of idle gossip, so I would far rather re-

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

turn to our chases and hunts out there in the wilds,
during that, to me, memorable autumn and winter.

"As fleet-winged birds flit round from bough to bough,
So do my restless thoughts flit backward now;
As sweets are gathered by the honey-bees,
So do my musings call glad memories 1"

"Tfrjiink vissza a mi iigyiinkrel" as the good old
saying goes. (Let us return to the business in hand!)

CHAPTER XII

" These are the Four that are never content, that have never been

filled since the Dews began :

Jacala's mouth, and the glut of the Kite, and the hands of the
Ape, and the greed of Man!"

" WELL, if you think you can ride the horses she does,
you have a pretty good conceit of yourself, that's all
I've got to say, my lad!"

The words struck my ear, while my hunter sidled and
backed here and there, flinging his delicate head im-
patiently about, and tossing snowy flakes of foam over
my faultless habit. Try as I might, I could not help
laughing at the discomfiture of the imperial heir-pre-
sumptive and the dumfounded expression which came
over his peaked, sallow features, this Prince whom
the portly keeper of the "Stag-Hound Inn" had mis-
taken for an ordinary mortal, a mere unit among the
largest meet of the season.

I turned my restless horse away, fearing, in my mis-
chievous delight, that I might be tempted to set the Boni-
face right regarding the lofty status of his august in-
terlocutor. But as I did so I caught the Prince's amazed
protest, as well as the reply thereto, which must have
been hard to swallow, for I heard myself referred to as a
"spirited, plucky, fearless, fine madam, worth a dozen
brace of washed-out dudes!"

This finished me up, and I fled across a field, putting
my hands down upon the withers of my excited thor-
oughbred to steady him. I was literally choking with
laughter, and the flat, melancholy country-side, with its

184

THE TRIBULATI

NCESS

cover of clustering wind -torn trees, its many sullen-
lookintf streams, running at mill-race speed through
the tall grasses of the plain, seemed transformed pro
tempo into a land of enchantment for me.

I had no great liking for this arrogant, bumptious,
imperial princelet — now a great and mighty emperor.
Besides, I was so young and ardent a sportswoman that
even so strange a compliment as that just mentioned
went straight to my heart.

I gazed with rapture at the boundless vistas of green
prairie and russet and tawny colored trees, and at the
undulating range of the distant mountains, showing
faintly in the dim distance, as I swept rapidly over the
magnificent park and grounds of our M. S. H. Count
Maurice P., whom I have already mentioned in the
preceding chapter, and at whose gates we awaited the
departure of the hunt.

I was recalled to the business on hand by the eagerly
expected notes of the horn, sounding the "Depart."

I

went the sweet, shrill, somewhat rauque harmony, so
dear to all true-born followers of Nimrod and of Diana.
The music of the horn was followed by lusty cheers;
the hounds wheeled round and began to work in an
almost mathematically straight line of waving tails and
glossy backs after a glorious red stag, who at once gave
us a taste of his power by leaping, with one admirable,
clean jump, across the bubbling waters of the little river
which gleamed amid tall reeds and rushes.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Indeed, the stag started off on his long journey as su-
perbly as ever did hunted animal, his pursuers sailing
away at the tail of the pack, none more forward, I may
humbly add, than myself and my darling sorrel stallion,
"Golden Arrow."

We crossed a broad, sandy road, the hounds stream-
ing before us, and the master hallooing like mad and
uncurling the long, supple lash of his whip with exu-
berant energy. The animal de chasse was by now but
a distant speck, bounding on the elastic turf.

Ah! but this was galloping! I bent my head down,
closing my lips tightly to prevent the swishing breeze
from parching my mouth and throat, but my soul was
quivering with joy, and I envied the master his stento-
rian voice, for I, too, would have loved to shout and
cheer and give vent to my uncontrollable enthusiasm.

Soon our course lay through tangled, dangerous
grass-fields, over huge hedges and yawners, which
emptied several saddles, without, however, slackening
our thundering pace until the stag lost himself momen-
tarily in the depths of a pine wood.

This short check was timely, for both horses and
riders were beginning to feel the strain on their muscles
and lungs. But soon we were off again; the hounds
rushed into a thicket, picked up the scent, and the race
began once more.

Doggedly and stubbornly did we now gallop, for the
deer just viewed had cleared, with apparently quite un-
impaired strength, a blackthorn hedge nearly seven
feet high. A fearful scramble among the hounds en-
sued, and the huntsmen whipped them off, cursing
savagely under their breath at the delay, although the
poor brutes' eagerness was well worthy of praise after
this exhausting run. We had now reached a wild and.
very rugged portion of the country ; dusk was falling,

1 86

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

and a cold wind, blowing through the rustling needles
of the pines, chilled us to the bone.

Truly the situation was becoming interesting. No-
where was there a sign of life, save when a plover rose
suddenly with a whistling shriek from the rush-fringed
edge of a water-course, and of all those who had started
so gayly, there were only seven riding with the pack —
the master, his son, who was then a brilliant young of-
ficer of Chasseurs, two huntsmen, the imperial Prince,
Rudi, and myself.

" Golden Arrow's " heart was thumping furiously un-
der his dark-green girths, and these frantic beats seemed
but an echo of my own breathless gasps. I glanced at
the tiny watch set in the handle of my whip, and was
amazed to find that the run had lasted two hours and
fifty-five minutes, including that one blissful check.

At that moment the stag, who very probably felt satis-
fied with the excellent dance he had led us, rushed into
a marshy, slimy pool, sheltered by a semicircle of jag-
ged, moss-grown rocks, where he stood at bay, looking
as fresh as if he had but just been started.

My hunter pricked up his dainty ears, sniffed the air,
and twitched with passionate impatience at his snaffle;
his blood was up, his soft eyes danced with ardor and
flashed with excitement. No wonder, for that headlong
rush through the bracing air was positively pregnant
with mirth and mischief, which that neck - or - nothing
chase could alone have produced upon horse and rider ;
and the hunting-fire was in " Golden Arrow," as it was
in myself. Across the hilly rise of the turf, through
the brushwood, 'twixt the gnarled boles of trunks black-
ening in the fast-gathering shadows, the hounds rushed
up pell-mell, and, splashing with frenzy through the
shallow pool, threw themselves upon the grand animal
who had nearly saved his foot, but who was killed with

187

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

the customary " who-whoop" ringing far and wide to
the very peaks of the mountains. As loud a shout, I
should say, as was ever echoed by the ringing cheers of
any hunt in the world.

"After him, my beauties — my beauties — tally-ho!
Hark forward!" I fairly shrieked, quite as wild by this
time as "Golden Arrow/' who curvetted and danced
madly under me. But the "death" cooled me off, for
I never have been able to witness without a shudder this
sudden collapse of a royal-courageous beast, whose
pluck and endurance have been all in vain, and who
sinks butchered beneath the blow of a cruel knife, a blow
dealt savagely, ruthlessly, and with a sort of ghastly,
inane joy.

"Oh, Lord!" I whispered, "I wish I were a better
huntress."

" Nekem vgy latszik, hogy, onnek nines szuksege ta
nitora" (meseems you don't need a teacher), replied
Rudi; but I exclaimed, impatiently, "Of course I do,
but you know how the saying goes, ' Ki farkassal tart,
annak vonitni kell ' (he that herds with wolves must learn
to howl), and I will yet rid myself, some time or other, of
this cursed weakness. "

My comrade laughed again. " Annal jobb" (so
much the better), he cried, "you little fool! Muzzi,
Muzzi, confound it, when will you cease to be so damn-
ably soft-hearted? You have so many manly qualities
in your little tiny self, why on earth can't you carry
matters further a bit, and give up feeling sorry for every
man, woman, child, or beast in distress? It spoils the
whole effect."

"Shut up! Rudi," I retorted; "you are more soft-
hearted than I am. Don't pose, please."

"Well, and supposing I am, what of it, you goose?
It's absurd to pity any living creature whose death is as

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

swift and painless as that stag's was; it is to linger that
would be hellish."

Many years later these words of my comrade's re-
curred to me and made my agony of sorrow and regret
for him less poignant.

In spite of my extreme fatigue, I was nevertheless
sorry when the hunt was over. Whatever I might be
elsewhere, my one ambition was to remain always the
queen of the hunting-field When in the saddle, an
unconquerable desire of being ever first behind the
hounds took possession of me, and gave me the grit to
urge my invariably difficult horses over gates and
fences, springing deer-like on innumerable on-and-off
doubles, in order to maintain a continual racing speed
from which nothing but a fall could turn me.

I do not think that I had even then, in these the most
buoyant days of my youth, a grain of vanity, but of my
gwast-magical influence over horses I was inordinately
proud. It had won for me the one affection I valued
most, that of my Empress, and, even had it done naught
else for me, I should have been well satisfied.

The " foot " was my prize on the day of the memorable
run above described, and, although I had hunted long
enough to have become a bit blasee with regard to such
honors, yet I confess that I was sincerely delighted to
see it dangling at the off side of my saddle.

"I trust that somebody will have the goodness to
tell me where we are," panted Count Maurice, sliding
from his wellnigh done-up horse. " I cannot remember
leading such a steeple-chasing hunt as this one for many
a long year, and, although I imagined that I knew the
country well, yet do I now solemnly give myself up for
lost."

His words were greeted by a merry ripple of laughter,
which made us momentarily ignore our sad plight and

189

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

the probable loss of our dinner, not to mention an in-
terminable jogging towards home at the dead of night-

Stobo, the oldest of the two huntsmen, an undersized
man of forty or thereabouts, with a hatchet face, cun-
ning, greenish-blue eyes sunk in a much weather-beaten
countenance, and a nose pointed like that of a ferret, ap-
proached, cap in hand. In a voice as foggy as if he had
followed the sea as a profession from his earliest youth,
he informed us that we were close to the mountains,
and that a mile farther on we would find some sort of a
village where perchance we might obtain bread and
sour milk, or even barsch-soup, besides fodder for our
tired-out mounts. A delectable outlook, indeed !

"Show the way!" growled the Count, to whom the
prospect evidently did not appeal. "God send that
we may drag ourselves there without being called upon
to carry the horses."

I burst into irrepressible laughter, which haut-fait
seemed to irritate our choleric master, for he paused with
one foot in the stirrup, and, turning his keen eyes tow-
ards us, cried out, wrathf ully :

" Wait until you are as old as I am, and doubled up
with rheumatism — then see whether you'll laugh at
the comforts of a situation like the present."

"You are not at all old," I replied, checking any sign
of my unholy joy. "Prince William here is ten times
more fagged out than you are, and Heaven knows that
age or rheumatism cannot serve him as an excuse."

This unfortunate youngster glared at me furiously,
while the Count, thoroughly pacified, vaulted into his
saddle and began pounding down a muddy path,
overhung with birch-trees, the drooping leaves of which
showered damply upon our shoulders as we followed
his burly form and the lean silhouette of Stobo, our
attractive leader.

190

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

"Have a cigarette, Muzzi," exclaimed the irrepres-
sible Rudi. "You and Willy join me in a calumet of
peace."

"Why of peace?" I retorted, tentatively, looking up
into the merry eyes of " my comrade Rudi " — this being
the titular etiquette of our brotherly and sisterly af-
fection.

He shamelessly stuck out his forefinger towards the
Prince, who had by this time sunk to the gloomy depths
of a bona-fide fit of sulks.

Poor Prince! His ordinarily pallid and somewhat
volcanic complexion seemed to have faded to a putty
hue, and we had the joke entirely to ourselves ! Indeed,
there was something warlike and almost defiant in the
thin, sternly set lips and coldly glittering eyes of the
lad.

Suddenly he jogged off at a sort of obstinate plodding
trot, leaving us far behind in the fast-gathering gloom.

"Now we're alone," laughed Rudi. "Don't
mind him, Muzzi; he'll be all right again after
lunch/'

"Mind him — you may be sure I don't, poor chapl but
I am very sorry to have nagged him. He is an unfort-
unate sort of a boy, and it is a shame to make fun of
him."

This wave of good sentiment was broken by our ex-
tremely opportune arrival at the little mountain village,
which to us was the land of promise, but which geo-
graphical authorities have not honored with recogni-
tion, and is only to be found on the most minute and
complete of staff maps.

As is invariably the case in those regions, the village
was built entirely of wood, the Jewish houses being
distinguishable from those of the peasants by an extra
coating of harsh blue coloring on their thinly plastered

191

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

walls. As we passed under the shrank, a gigantic and
most dangerous-looking pine-wood post, painted in the
national colors, which crosses all roads leading into
villages, and bounds up in the air at a touch of the
toll-gatherer in a most uncanny fashion, in order to let
carriages or riders pass by, a crowd of natives came
running out of their hovels to gaze at us with an admi-
ration which our muddy and exhausted condition did
not deserve or invite.

A thin, scraggy Jew, wearing a long kaftan and
greasy peiches, or side curls, hurried out of a dirty little
inn standing by the road-side and entreated us, with a
most imploringly comical gesture of his grimy hands,
to honor him with our visit.

I have seen many Jews during my life, alas ! orthodox
and unorthodox ones, but a frowzier, more uninviting-
looking specimen of " the chosen race " it has never been
my luck to encounter. Even the hounds seemed to
recoil from him, and drew back snarling between the
very legs of our horses.

"II. faut faire contre fortune bon coeur," sighed the
Count, throwing the reins of his hunter over its neck,
and descending heavily to the ground, which was a
strange mixture of sharp pebbles, rotting vegetable
matter, and dark-hued slime of a most offensive quality.
We all followed his example and filed into the low-
ceiled Wein - Schenke, where we were met and almost
suffocated by an all-pervading stench of onions, stale
cheese, sour beer, and, I am sorry to say, filth.

I noticed that Stobo, who had preceded us to parley
with mine host in a strange patois which was unknown
to me, looked at the villanous innkeeper with a stare
of something more than the usual contempt and dis-
gust which is the undisputed portion of any member of
the Jewish race when addressed by a Christian out there.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OJ< A 1'RINCESS

Indeed, the tone of the conversation was so cutting
and so terse on one side, and so cringing and obsequious
on the other, that I was quite amazed that any human
creature would permit himself, as this Jew did, to be thus
addressed without showing so much as a sign of re-
sentment or indignation.

After a few minutes of such pleasant palaver, Stobo
came nearer and informed us that we could obtain bread
and cheese and also some rosoglio and ale to wash down
this enticing fare. A pitiable groan from the Count
and a derisive chuckle from Rudi were all the answer
given, and with praiseworthy resignation we sat down
at a rickety table, innocent of any kind of napery, which
was soon covered with foggy glasses, black bread, and
that horror of all horrors, sheep-cheese, a whitish, glis-
tening, moist substance, the rubber-like elasticity of
which no teeth on earth can hope to reduce to any-
thing digestible.

I have retained very clearly in my mind's eye the pict-
ure presented by this abominable little way-side eating-
house, down to the most unimportant detail, and what a
picture it was! Rembrandt mayhap would have de-
lighted in the rich, dusky hue of the exceptionally un-
clean walls, and in the fitful gleams of ruddy glow
thrown upon the even filthier and darker rafters over-
head by a fire of pine cones and needles crackling in the
stove. But what effect of light and shadow, be it never
so artistic, could compensate the strong smell of sheep
and garlic, and the abominable dirtiness of our surround-
ings, especially the painful assiduity of that awful,
feline, soft-footed Jew, who hovered above us like a bird
of ill-omen, casting glances of fear and of malignity from
his little red-rimmed, bead-like eyes about him, as he
nervously attended to our wants? So great was his
apparent terror that one would have been justified in
N 193

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

supposing that he believed us capable of having purpose-
ly come to sack and pillage his place and to put his
family to the sword.

I could bear the whole thing no longer, and, jumping
to my feet ,1 walked to the little window, which, in lieu of
curtains, was garlanded with chaplets of onions and of
black, pungent sausages.

"The moon is rising, Count Maurice," I cried, joy-
fully; "can't we start?" And then, catching sight of
the village street, as my eyes slowly descended from
the pure, star-studded heavens down to the earth, I ex-
claimed, "Oh, Lord! what is the matter; there is as big
a crowd outside as if a wedding were going on or a
murder had been committed."

I had been speaking in German, but when the word
Mord (murder) left my lips the wretched Jewish inn-
keeper gave a squeal like that of a shot rabbit, and,
turning on his heel, fled out of the room by a back door.

" Hullo, what's up with the creature?" exclaimed the
Count, who stopped in the act of carrying to his lips a
glass of thick, pink, syrupy rosoglio, and wellnigh
dropped it in the extremity of his astonishment.

Stobo, who had until now stood silently behind Rudi's
chair, took a step towards the master, and respectfully
whispered something in his ear.

"Good heavens, you don't say so! Why in thunder
did you not tell us before? Pay the beggar and let us
be off. The nasty, contemptible brute 1 Hurry up, I
beg ! I'll thank you to see that the horses are brought
round at once;" and with a revolting shrug of his broad
shoulders Count P. seized me by the wrist and fairly
dragged me out of the house.

Nothing can surely equal the ravenous curiosity of
village populations, and it seemed as if we would never
accomplish the task of mounting our horses, for, like a

- 194

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

herd of cattle, stood the inhabitants of the place and
possibly of all its neighboring regions, packed closer
to each other than sardines in a box, leaning over one
another's shoulders, peering beneath one another's
arms — a jostling, struggling, swaying mass of human-
ity, seething about us in their endeavors to see "the
quality." It was by no means an easy job to extricate
our horses and dogs, who disliked this demonstration
as thoroughly as we did, from such a throng.

The Count was by this time as angry as a bear,
and, regardless of his vassals' feelings, began to lay
about him with his whip in no measured way, yelling
the while at the top of his voice for them to fall back,
which they did with such a will that they tumbled help-
lessly upon each other, quarrelling and growling in the
most ludicrous manner.

Meanwhile Rudi, who had managed to bring his cur-
vetting horse alongside of mine, whispered, laughingly :

" This is the day for exhibitions of some choice brands
of tempers. Why, what between our dearest master,
and friend Willy, we have had a rare chance of ad-
miring the sweet side of human nature 1 By-the-bye,
what made our revered and honored M. S. H. yank you
so unceremoniously from the festive scene of our Lucul-
lian supper?"

"Oh! do stop, Rudi/' I said, impatiently; "you are
always making fun of everything and everybody. That
crowd meant kindly just now. Fin sorry they did not
pull you off your horse in their enthusiasm, and as to the
Count, why, he's tired and a wee bit sulky, that's all."

I deplore to state that at this juncture a volley of oaths
met our ear, emanating from the dear old fellow whom
I was in the act of defending against my comrade's
accusations of ill-temper. This proved to be the last
straw, and he gave vent to such a guffaw that Prince

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

William forgot his own grievances and rode up to us,
inquiring what had happened. Rudi's peals of laugh-
ter rendering him unfit to reply, I answered for him,
assuming a lofty tone, improvised on the spur of the
moment, with a view of marking my disapproval of the
imperial and imperious young man's previous shocking
behavior. Dignity and I, however, have never trotted
amicably in double harness, and my assumption of a
manner so foreign to me had the result of making the
Prince gaze at me with so comical an expression of stu-
pefaction that my facial nerves quickly relaxed into a
grin almost as broad as Rudi's.

By this time it was nearly eight o'clock, and we
seemed to be riding in a sea of deep indigo, studded over-
head by myriads of bright diamond points, and rendered
transparent here and there by the cold light of a glit-
tering, sharp-edged half-moon, which showed its mock-
ing profile above the black scarps of some forest-covered
mountains. The horses were too tired for us to dare
attempt a trot on the uneven stone-strewn path we were
following, and, although we had all donned our covert-
coats, we formed a rather pathetic bunch of shivering
riders, while the hounds dragged themselves painfully
on their soft pads, looking ghostly in the fitful, shifting
light.

Thoroughly fatigued, and somewhat bored, too, I sud-
denly turned to the master, who was almost immedi-
ately behind me, and asked him what had caused him
to leave the inn so precipitately.

" I ought to have apologized already for ushering you
so unceremoniously out, my dear child," he replied,
gravely; "but, to tell you the truth, my disgust at dis-
covering under whose roof we had been breaking bread
made me forget what little manners I possess/'

"There is no apology needed/' I said, quickly, "but

196

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

will you not beguile this long retreat by telling us what
sort of a discovery you made?"

"A very unpleasant one, I assure you. It is a long
story, and by now almost a forgotten one, yet had I
known who that beast of a Jew was I would have walk-
ed home hungry and led my horse by the bridle, and
yours as well, before I would have entered his filthy
Schenke."

These words, of course, whetted our curiosity, and
we clustered around him, entreating him to tell us the
story. It proved to be one of those dramatic incidents
one is supposed to encounter solely in novels, but which,
in spite of this firmly grounded idea, abound in real life,
especially on the border-lands of civilization.

I do not think that Count P. was what one might
call a remarkable raconteur; yet the tale he told us that
night created a most vivid and unforgettable impression
on all our minds.

" Some years ago," he began, " this part of the world
was even more desolate and wilder than it is to-day —
which is saying a good deal," he added, waving the
handle of his whip towards the gloomy plain which we
were now traversing. " In the winter, especially, travel-
ling was anything but pleasant, and gave one a fair
idea of Siberian trips. Dear me ! I remember well those
endless sledge drives over a frozen world, the steel-color-
ed sky above, glowing now and again towards the east
with all the hues of the aurora borealis at night, and
during the day the dazzle of snow and ice striking one
almost blind. The poverty of the people was some-
thing to be remembered ; it is pretty bad now, but then
it was past comprehension, and the crass ignorance,
the dirt, the drunkenness — bah! it makes my stomach
heave to think of it I You may be sure that at that time,
even more than now, the cursed Jew-traders were respon-

197

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

sible for a good third of this distressing state of affairs,
for the peasants, as is their worthy habit, even to this
day, in order to obtain wodka, mortgaged their harvests
before they were sown, and would have sold their chil-
dren, too, at so much a pound to the rascals, had it been
possible to do so. Well, this Schweinehund (pig-dog)
we had the bliss of seeing to-night appeared upon the
scene some forty years ago, and opened a sort of road-
house, at the side of the highway. He prospered, of
course, as all his confounded tribe have a knack of do-
ing, and finally succeeded in lording it over the whole
village, which he practically owned. Finally he man-
aged to force a small Gutsbesitzer, or land -owner, who
was deeply in his debt, to give him his daughter in mar-
riage. Such unions were very rare in those days, and
this especial one aroused the deepest indignation for
miles around. But the unfortunate girl, who was bare-
ly sixteen and a beauty, was coerced by her drunken
scamp of a father to give her consent, and she left her
comfortable home — comparatively speaking — to share
the fortunes of the execrable usurer, who took her in
payment of her father's indebtedness.

"Finally she died when giving birth to her second
child, a little girl, the other one being as fine a specimen
of a boy as was ever seen, at least so I have been told.
Time passed on, and the usurer became more and more
abhorred and feared, until finally his victims turned
en masse against him, and his luck forsook him
to such an extent that he was finally reduced to a
state of relative poverty. Long before this occurred,
however, his son had, as soon as he grew up to boy-
hood, fled the paternal house, no one knew whither;
while the daughter was transformed into a sort of fille
d'auberge, who bore no enviable reputation, and shared
with her sire the hatred and contempt of the peasantry.

198.

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Finally, one fine day, or rather night, in the depths of
winter, a little sleigh drew up before the wretched inn
which we honored with our presence a while ago. On
the threshold of the half-open door stood the attractive-
looking daughter of the Jew, wearing the picturesque
costume of our peasant women, and over her graceful
head a flashy silken handkerchief to shield her from
the intense cold. The traveller, a tall, broad-shoul-
dered man, in the prime of youth, and wrapped in a
costly fur pelisse, jumped out of the sleigh, and, bowing
courteously to her, asked whether he could secure a
night's lodging at the pot-house, of which she seemed
to be the mistress. She answered that her father was
from home, but that she herself would see to his comforts,
and, bidding the driver carry his traps into an extremely
dirty room, the door of which she threw wide open, he
followed her inside the house, and sat down wearily on a
low bench before the glowing stove.

" Without speaking, the young hostess stood by the
clumsy table, curiously examining her handsome guest
through two glinting slits of half-shut eyes. In spite
of her undeniable beauty, there was something fierce
and cruel in the expression of her brilliant, delicate face,
and, on the only occasion when I saw her, her swift,
stealthy movements reminded me involuntarily of a
young leopard about to spring on its prey.

"While she was preparing a supper for. him, which
doubtless was as palatable and toothsome as the one we
partook of with so much relish ourselves, she managed
to question him so cleverly and adroitly that, although
he must have been reluctant to answer, she learned that
he was very well off and travelling for a great furrier.
A little later she ushered him to a miserable room under
the roof — I saw the place after the crime, and I assure
you that it gave me a shock, so dark and dismal and

199

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

mouldy did it look. She watched her guest as he un-
fastened the straps of his portmanteaus, and scattered
upon the crazy-looking bed and unsteady table some
magnificent fur rugs and other costly belongings ; then,
without apology or even a word of good-night, she left
him, satisfied, no doubt, with what she had seen.

" Now, mind you, I'm telling you this story as it was
told to me, and I do not vouch for details — it's a sort of
piecing things together without much attempt at creat-
ing an effect; but, somehow, the whole affair, when I
think of it, seems to paint itself upon my mental retina,
and that is how the trick comes easy to me, perhaps, of
making you see the dramatic situation just as it appears
so often to my imagination. Moreover, the minute de-
tails of the incident leaked out during the inquest and
trial, so that I need be no conjurer to place them vividly
before you.

" Well, to return to our muttons, or rather to our ami-
able Hebrew friends. It appears that upon reaching
the lower floor the girl carefully bolted the outside en-
trance ; then, stretching herself upon the projecting ledge
of the huge porcelain stove, which is, as you know, the
bedstead of our peasantry in winter, she listened intently
to the footsteps of her guest overhead. Soon these
muffled sounds ceased, and the silence became absolute
and intense, broken only by the crackling of the icicles
on the roof.

"Two hours or thereabouts passed thus, and still the
girl on the stove-ledge lay motionless, with wide-open
eyes, which wandered uncannily from one dark corner
to another. Suddenly she raised her small, dark head,
and, after listening for a few seconds, jumped to her feet
and unbolted the door. Outside stood a man, tall and
thin, with stooping shoulders and the repulsive, lower-
ing cast of countenance which you had the ill fortune to

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

gaze upon tonight. He shook the snow from his long
cloak as he entered he room, and strode towards the
stove, where he proceeded to warm his half-frozen hands,
while the girl hastened to place his supper upon the
table.

" Then, approaching her father — for such was the late
visitor — she whispered, pointing to the ceiling with her
finger :

"'There is a gentleman asleep up there, a fine gentle-
man, who has lots and lots of money and fine clothes,
and a fur coat fit for a king. He came late to-night and
asked for supper and a bed, so I put him up as well as I
could. I think that he is going away in the morning.
He told me he was a fur-trader, although I do not believe
it, and, of course, he cannot get anything to buy or sell
in this place.'

"The Jew listened to this whispered report without
raising his head from the coarse fare which he was
greedily consuming, but, as she paused from sheer lack
of breath, he said, musingly: 'A rich fur-trader, eh?
Did he tell you that he had lots of money?'

"'No/ the girl replied, 'he did not tell me so, natu-
rally ; but when I took him to his room he opened a box
full of gold things, and I saw his beautiful furs and
velvets, and he wears a diamond on his finger, and
Mitchka, who drove him here in his sleigh, told me that
he had given him five rubles for himself — just think
of it, five rubles above the usual price for driving him
here. He must be very rich, for even Their Nobilities,
when they hire a sleigh, never give but one ruble as a
tip to the driver/

" The Jew was probably foxy enough to pretend in-
difference concerning his pretty daughter's prattle, and
merely asked her whom she had seen that day.

"Offended by this lack of interest displayed by her

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

worthy parent, she answered surlily that old Ephraim
had called to see him, and had told her that if he did not
send him some money by the end of the week he would
make life a hell for him; that he had raved about the
cruel way he had been treated, and added that he would
show no mercy.

" This time the girl had no reason to complain of the
effect created by her words, for the Jew was hit on a sore
spot. All this noise was about a couple of hundred
rubles, a sum that he had borrowed from Ephraim
five years before, and which had since then been grow-
ing larger year by year, because that unnatural co-
religionist only consented to renew the paper on con-
dition that thieving interests should be added to the
principal every time the sum became due.

"When the girl had retired to her own quarters, leav-
ing the Jew alone with his unenviable thoughts, she
heard him pacing slowly up and down the room, mut-
tering blood-curdling curses and presumably calculating
his chances of extricating himself successfully from the
countless difficulties which hedged him in on all sides.

"It was by that time approaching the hour of dawn,
snow was falling heavily, and the wind, which had risen,
was rattling the window-frames and howling dismally
around the corners of the rickety old wooden house.
Stealthily and cautiously, as though he feared to awaken
a slumbering infant, the Jew — as he explained later —
lighted a tallow dip at the glowing embers of the stove,
and, unfastening the drawer of a worm-eaten buffet in
the corner, drew out a long - pointed, slender - bladed
knife, which he kept well sharpened for the purpose of
killing sheep in the season. (The picture which he must
have presented while testing the razor-like blade on the
end of his finger should, methinks, have been a pecul-
iarly sinister one, with the flickering light of the splut-

202

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

tering candle throwing a succession of reddish shadows
on his vile countenance.) When satisfied with the keen-
ness of the murderous weapon, he blew out the candle,
and, removing his shoes, returned to the stove. During
a few moments he gazed abstractedly at it as if count-
ing the bricks wherewith it was constructed ; then, with
another curse — possibly for luck this time — he crept to
the staircase, which he ascended as if treading on eggs.
These highly interesting details were furnished by
himself to his lawyers before the trial, and he said also
then that God had tempted him, if you please.

" In the room above all was perfectly still. The dim
light from the dying fire was bright enough to show
the handsome stranger lying stretched out at full length
upon the bench-like lounge, his blond head pillowed on
the rich blue velvet of his dressing-gown, one muscular
white hand hanging to the floor, the other — on which
sparkled the great diamond — thrown back above his
head. Gently the broad chest heaved, and the slight
creaking of the door did not even cause the young man
to turn in his sleep. Softly and cautiously the beastly
wretch drew nearer and nearer, until he touched the
edge of the sofa ; then, with one swift movement of his
thin but powerful arm, he plunged the long knife into
the side of his unfortunate guest. Truly did the blow
go home. A short struggle, a gasp, a gurgle as of a
pump filling with air, then silence again, broken only
by the hurried breathing of the assassin bending over
his victim. The knife, which stuck in the ghastly
wound, prevented it from bleeding freely, but the great
blue eyes of the dead man had opened in the death agony
with a stare of boundless horror and of reproach. With
a shudder the Jew shrank back, and slowly retreated
from the room ' & reculon/ never once taking his eyes

off the dead man's face.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

" When he once more reached the lower floor, his first
act was to unlock a closet where he kept his provision of
spirits, and, filling a tea-cup to the brim with this dan-
gerously fiery stuff, cheap wodka, he drained it to the
last drop. Somewhat restored by this copious libation,
he entered his daughter's room, and, shaking her by
the shoulder, called to her to get up.

" Completely bewildered, as well she might be, the girl
confronted her father with blanched lips and quivering
limbs. 'What do you want, old man?' she screamed.
'Are you drunk? What is it you wish?'

"'I have killed your fine gentleman because I want-
ed his gold to pay Ephraim, and also to put an end to
your eternal taunts, and I may as well tell you that
if you do not come up-stairs to help me hide the corpse
I will kill you, too/

"With a groan of terror the girl covered her face with
her clasped hands, and rocked herself to and fro, moan-
ing piteously. At last, trembling from head to foot, she
reluctantly followed him. She read in his eyes that
there was no escape for her, and that she would share
the traveller's doom were she to refuse to accomplish
the gruesome task imposed upon her. Two hours later,
accordingly, every trace of the awful tragedy had dis-
appeared from view. The Jew, whose strength was
proverbial for miles around — a rather remarkable quality
for a Jew to possess, by-the-bye — had carried the rigid
body into a small outhouse, where he concealed it under
piles of fire-wood, while his daughter, who was grad-
ually recovering her devil-may-care pertness, and whose
mean little heart was very likely beating at the thought
of all the pleasures which the gold of the murdered man
would procure for her, busied herself diligently with
hiding in various corners of the house all his covetable
belongings. Hers was so wild, untamed, and naturally

204

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

cruel a nature that, despite her first revolt against the
bloody deed, she would doubtless have hesitated now,
had it been within her power, to resuscitate the body
of the young stranger, for fear of having to restore his
treasures.

"At eight o'clock the first post-cart stopped on its
way before the door. The Jewish innkeeper was on
duty, as usual, and the dainty little mistress of the house
stood on the threshold, glancing coquettishly at the
driver, from under the silky folds of her flaring kerchief.
Among the passengers was the owner of the St. Peter's
inn, the best which our town boasts of. Big, burly, ru-
bicund, and good-natured, Petrowski Ivanovitch was
then the type of a really successful Boniface.

" He had served in the army, was a hard drinker, and
never passed a Schenke without generously treating all
his companions of the moment. That morning Pe-
trowsl^j seemed more jovial even than usual, and, jump-
ing from the cart, he advanced, exclaiming :

" ' Ha 1 ha ! you old fox 1 you've had a splendid surprise,
eh? Upon my word, I don't grudge it to you, although
you are a mean old Jew, for you have had your share of
bad luck ; but still such a stroke of fortune will make
many of your enemies curse you the more.'

"'What do you mean?' said the amazed innkeeper.
' I have had no stroke of luck that I know of.'

"'No stroke of luck!' repeated the other, with evident
surprise. ' Why, had you no visitor from foreign parts
last night? What's become of him, then?'

"The father and daughter exchanged looks which
would have given a close observer food for reflection.

"'Well,' the Jew admitted, cautiously, 'my girl says
that a stranger did stop for a bite of bread and cheese
last evening, but he pursued his way at once.'

" ' You must be joking ; it isn't possible. I told him

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

yesterday when he left my house, where he had put up
for the night, that his plan was a bad one. I, for one,
hate practical jokes when they are carried too far ; but
still he cannot intend to wait any longer before showing
himself in his true colors. Why, my esteemed friend,
it's your own son who ran away from home fifteen
years ago, come back from the Americas with a big
fortune for you and that little girl there, who is going
to be a great lady now. '

"My son! My son! Oh, God of revenge! Is it
my son, my first-born, that I have killed!'

"The words rang out dismally and re-echoed on the
morning wind, while the assistants stood speechless
with horror, unable as yet to realize the full sense con-
veyed by them. With a piercing shriek the girl fell face
forward on the snow in a dead faint, while her father,
tearing at his scanty locks, ran into the house, calling
to those about him to come And see the body of his
murdered son/'

We all gasped with horror as the Count finished his
thrilling story, and the silence remained unbroken for a
few minutes, except for the regular beating of our horse's
hoofs on the hard road. Presently the thin voice of
Prince William piped forth :

"Tell me, Count, how is it that this eminently kind
and righteous father should now be at large, instead
of having long ago paid the penalty of his abominable
crime?"

"Oh! that is only because his son's money, which he
inherited in spite of all, more's the pity, served to pay
some extremely clever lawyers and doctors who induced
the jury to believe and declare that the old devil had com-
mitted this revolting deed in a fit of temporary insanity,
brought about by financial troubles. The creature was
detained in a lunatic asylum for some time, and when he

206

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

came out of it he was as poor as ever, and his fine lady
daughter had fled. She is, I have been told, plying a
not altogether worthy trade in Berlin ; or perhaps she is
dead, which it would be far more satisfactory to believe."

Slowly and solemnly far-away church bells chimed
out the Angelus, the muffled sounds echoing sullenly
over the plain, which was broken here and there by
clumps of dark fir-trees. Very melancholy did the
landscape look in this northern twilight, where every-
thing was gray and motionless, the moon glittering in
the steel-hued sky and shining strongly on the broad
track, framed on both sides by denuded birch-trees, which
we were now following. Far away in the east glowed
a faint suggestion of aurora borealis, and from this
unnatural dream-like light the smallest objects, as well
as the biggest ones, borrowed weird and ghostly shapes.
A little cart, drawn by a shaggy pony, hove in sight, the
noise made by the sharp hoofs of the rapidly trotting
animal, coupled with the jingling bells attached to his
collar, breaking merrily upon the solemn silence.

" How far are we from home now, I wonder?" inquired
the Count. The driver of the cart, who was clothed in
sheepskins and sat sideways on the dashboard of his
clumsy vehicle, knew his Excellency at once, and called
out:

" Less than a verst. Your nobility can see the lights
of the village now;" then, shaking the pony's greasy
reins and pointing with his whip as he spoke, he passed
on and was soon lost to sight.

"How creepy you have made us all feel!" I said to the
Count. "That was an awful story of yours."

He laughed his cheery, throaty laugh, and, with a
shrug of his broad shoulders, exclaimed: "You are a
very likely object for creepiness, are you not? A little
woman who has remained locked up in a room at the

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

dead of night with a murderous, ruffianly burglar, with-
out betraying a trace of fear, cannot easily make me be-
lieve that my little yarn, ugly as it may be, has seriously
unnerved her. By-the-bye, it's your turn now ; tell the
youngsters that little incident ; it will help us all to forget
how tired and weary we are, and make this confounded
last mile or so endurable."

The request having been taken up by Rudi and Prince
William, I was^ forced, nolens volens, to recount my ex-
perience with the burglar, an adventure which had
taken place a few weeks previously :

"I had come home late on the eventful night when
it happened. I could not have been asleep for a very
long time, when I opened my eyes and gazed about me
with that peculiar feeling which is begotten by the sen-
sation of some strange presence near you. The large
room, lighted by the warm glow of the fire and by an
unusually large night-lamp, was, however, perfectly
still, even the tiny Bengalis in their silver cage were
huddled together like so many little balls of down, and
had not stirred. Suddenly I saw a man of gigantic
proportions stooping over a scintillating mass of jewels
scattered before him. No, I was not dreaming, neither
were my eyes deceiving me, for I could hear the sound
of his quick breathing, hissing through the clenched
teeth, shut with bull-dog tenacity upon the handle of a
long, sharp-pointed Kandjar. The man's back was
towards me, and his face, reflected by the large mirror
in front of him, was one which one is not likely to forget,
especially when seen under such peculiarly trying cir-
cumstances. The sunken eyes had a piercing, restless
look, the complexion was dark to swarthiness, the jetty
hair and beard framed the bullet-head with a tangle of
matted curls, and the square shoulders and massive
arms looked huge under his long-skirted touloupe. I

208

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

lay perfectly still, watching him almost indifferently,
while he coolly pocketed one after another the diamonds
and rubies that I had worn that night at Princess C.'s
hunt-dinner, and which my sleepy women had omitted
to put away after undressing me. I mentally took
note of his every movement, as if I were merely safely
ensconced in a proscenium box, enjoying, with a thrill
of interest, the villain's dark deeds on some theatrical
stage. I even felt quite indignant at the ruffian's un-
pardonable lack of gentleness when he brutally snapped
in twain a superb and favorite tiara of mine which was
too bulky to enter even his capacious pocket.

" Gradually, however, a sense of the danger I was run-
ning began to dawn upon me, the spell was broken,
and, with a slight shiver of apprehension, I slowly and
noiselessly withdrew my right hand from beneath the
bed covering, and yet more slowly and cautiously reach-
ed for the revolver which hung above my head among
the drooping draperies of the canopy under which I had
slept. My heart beat so loudly the while that I won-
dered why my nocturnal visitor did not hear it and
pounce upon me with his terrible knife. At last I
grasped the weapon, the cold, metallic touch of which
magically restored to me my customary presence
d'esprit. Carefully levelling it at the intruder, I
stretched out my arm to its full length, and I said
quietly :

" ' Don't you think that your errand here is likely to
lead you into trouble?'

"If the ceiling had dropped upon his head, or the
Bengalis in the cage had flown into his face and attempt-
ed to peck out his eyes with their tiny beaks, the fellow
could not have looked more abjectly terrified and amazed.
With a hoarse execration, he not only dropped the hand-
ful of bracelets, rings, and pendants which he held, but
o 209

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

also, relaxing his grip on his weapon, he allowed it to
fall with a clatter at his feet.

" Dreading that he might gather himself together for
a spring towards me, across the long room, I hurriedly
added : ' I wouldn't approach nearer if I were you, for
my bullets can reach you before you can stir, and if
you move I will be under the painful necessity of killing
you like a dog. '

"Never before nor since have I seen on a human
countenance such a mixture of baffled rage, impotent
fury, and sickly fear. He closed and unclosed his fists
nervously, shooting ferocious glances at me from under
his shaggy brows. But prudence was evidently to him
the best part of valor, for he stood as if rooted to the
spot, without uttering a word.

"'Now/ I continued, 'what business had you to enter
my room at night in order to steal jewels, celebrated
throughout Europe, and which nobody would ever have
dreamed of buying from you? See how foolish you are,
and how stupidly you have risked your precious life,
not to mention the unpleasant hours you are going to
spend here until I can see you delivered into the hands
of the guard/

"At this taunt he literally ground his teeth. 'Oh,
yes/ I continued, undisturbed, 'you thought that
even should I awake I would be a contemptible adver-
sary, that I would cry and beg for mercy, and be only too
happy to entreat you to accept those tempting trinkets
yonder, so that you should spare me. You know, doubt-
lessly, that my servants sleep beyond reach of my call,
and that my husband and his aide-de-camp are absent,
so that I am completely unprotected. Well, now, you
see what a mistake you have made. As you see, I am
quite able to look after myself, and, what is more, I am
not a bit afraid of you/

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

" Why I thus rambled on I cannot tell, but I suppose
that I must have felt a bit lonely in this big room, with
that motionless figure towering in the corner, and that
the sound of my own voice made matters a little less
dreary. The situation was by no means so favorable
as I attempted to depict it, for there was nothing to pre-
vent my prisoner from springing upon me when I be-
came overpowered by fatigue, and from putting an end
to my galling remarks and to my slender hold on exist-
ence as well. But he apparently did not realize this,
for suddenly throwing his hands before him — the move-
ment intuitively causing me to tighten my pressure on
the trigger — half entreatingly, half menacingly, he
jerked out :

"Let me go; I won't hurt you; but just let me go —
let me go.'

"My outstretched arm was shaking badly, although
I had changed the hand in which I held my weapon
several times during the course of this interesting con-
versation, and I felt sorely tempted to grant the poor
devil's pusillanimous request. But something within
me seemed to forbid that, and, settling myself more com-
fortably on my pillows, so as to rest my elbow on my
raised knee, I shook my head in emphatic denial, as if
the proposal were too preposterous to be countenanced
for an instant. Then, with an unexplainable feeling of
compunction, I said, somewhat pityingly :

"You must be tired of standing there so long; sit
down on that pile of cushions near the fire ; you'll be
more comfortable/ Hardly had I spoken the words
when the utter absurdity of such a possibility stared me
in the face, and I could hardly repress a smile. Strange-
ly enough, my uncouth companion did not seem to con-
sider matters in the same light, for, uttering an exclama-
tion which was something between a groan and a curse,

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

he sank wearily on the proffered seat. I glanced at
the clock and saw that it was about to strike the half
after four. I was aware that at five o'clock the grooms
would get up to attend to their duties in the neighboring
stables, and that then I would have a chance of calling
them to my assistance. But the comparatively short
period of time which separated me from this blissful
moment seemed like an eternity, and I felt the blood
tingling in my veins with impatience and anger at the
woful silliness of my situation and at the idiotic ar-
rangement of a house where the servants' quarters were
not in communication with the main apartments. It
was difficult under the circumstances to continue the
conversation which I had so aimlessly begun with my
unbidden guest, but anything was better than an ener-
vating silence, which was fast becoming an almost
tangible thing.

" Just as I was on the point, out of sheer desperation, of
addressing myself once more to him, the oft-heard, rasp-
ing sound of the stable portals met my ear, and I raised
such a shout that the slender baccarat glass at my bed-
side vibrated as if I had struck it. The man started to
his feet and took one step towards me, but, with renewed
force and strength of purpose, I once more levelled my
revolver in the direction of his head, and, in tones which
were neither courteous nor soft this time, I exclaimed,
'Keep still, or you are a dead man!' A moment later
the door flew open under the hand of my head groom,
who was followed by two or three of his underlings, and
I dropped my weapon from my tired and nerveless hand.

"My nocturnal visitor was at once securely bound
and removed to an outhouse, where some of my men
stood guard over him until he was handed to the local
authorities. Poor fool, his presence of mind had so
utterly forsaken him that during his long stay in my

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

apartment he had not even thought of emptying his
pockets, and it was the captain of gendarmerie who,
with his own hands, recovered from his rags my rubies,
diamonds, and pearls.

" During the period which preceded the trial, and dur-
ing the trial itself, I regretted many a time that I had not
allowed him to escape, for I am sorry to say that, being
ridiculously tender-hearted, I felt continual remorse at
the idea that that poor wretch was suffering a long series
of mental and bodily discomforts, which I might have
spared him by a little more leniency. I may as well
add that I tried several times to withdraw my complaint
and to obtain his liberty, but the laws are strict, and in
spite of all the powerful influence which I set to work in
the matter, I was, to my great disgust, completely un-
successful. All that I could obtain was that, instead of
being condemned to twenty-one years' penal servitude,
he was let off with two years' hard labor."

"You foolish woman 1" cried the Count, as I was con-
cluding my recital, " why do you not tell them that you
visit him regularly in his prison, that you tip his jailers
so that they may treat him with especial kindness, and
that you have sworn never once to wear the jewels which
he tried to appropriate in so free-handed a way during
his term of imprisonment I"

"That's Muzzi all over," replied Rudi; "oh, you silly
girl, you silly girl! But here at last we are at home/'
he added, as we rattled into the yard of the castle.

I must conclude this chapter by stating that four
years later I happened to be one of a hunting-party in
the mountains of Tyrol. One morning we started at
five o'clock to reach the summit of a peak where the
chamois were plentiful, and after a few hours of excellent
sport we repaired to a tiny chalet perched on a rock, in
order to ask for a drink of milk and a piece of bread and

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

cheese — the habitual mountaineer's fare. What was
my surprise, not to say amazement, when, casting my
eyes on the stalwart Yager who opened the door for us, I
recognized the features — so well graven in my mind —
of my old friend the burglar! He also knew me in an
instant, and his tanned complexion assumed the dusky
red of a well-baked brick.

"Why, my friend," said I, "how do you come here?"

For a moment he twisted the rim of his soft felt hat
between his hands, and then, with a smile that suddenly
transfigured his heavy, lowering features into some-
thing almost winsome, he said, resolutely :

"I ought to thank you for having been the cause of
this change in my circumstances. Had you let me
escape that night as I implored you to do, I should have
certainly pursued my career of theft and of crime, but
your courage and your ultimate kindness to me, little
as I deserved them, showed me what confronted me
should I fall into the hands of people less good-hearted
than yourself, in case of my reassuming my previous
mode of life. So I turned my back on my old haunts,
and by dint of hard work and perseverance I succeeded
in earning enough money to travel to this place, and to
establish myself as an innkeeper on these mountains,
buying the chalet with that money which you gave me
when I left jail."

All's well that ends well, and I went away that after-
noon feeling as if somebody had lifted a heavy weight
off my mind. I hope, however, that this little incident
of my past life will not fall under the eyes of any gentle-
man belonging to the "profession." For it is seldom,
indeed, that a burglar is regenerated by being thus
caught in the act, and I should very much dislike to
encourage any of these gentry to try their hand at a
similar experiment.

214

CHAPTER

"Schweigend in des Abends Stille
BUckt des Mondes Silberlicht;
Wie es dort mit iipp'ger Fulle
Durch die dunkeln Blatter brichtl

"Wolken zieh'n auf luft'gen Spuren

Tanzend um den Silberschein,
Und es wiegen sich die Fluren

Sanft zum sussen Schlummer ein."

THE tiny wavelets of the Mediterranean, with a laugh-
ing, rippling sound, washed against the marble sea-wall
of the villa. The night was perfect ; flooded with moon-
light and peace; redolent with the fragrance of myriads
of orange and lemon blossoms, which starred the luxu-
riant groves on the hilly shore behind the vast gardens.
Among the branches of a magnolia nearby a couple of
nightingales were warbling as if their little throats
would burst in the very ecstasy of their rapture. Oc-
casionally the splash of an oar or the voice of a sailor
was wafted towards us on the night breeze.

So brilliant was the light of the moon that every de-
tail of the wonderful land and sea scapes could be distin-
guished with absolute clearness. The flowers which
filled the parterres, the tall palms raising their proud
plumelike heads towards heaven, the snow-white build-
ings, backed by dense verdure, and the marble terraces
where Cape jessamines and Virginia creepers ran
riot, were, like the far -stretching waters, suffused by

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

silvery rays which rendered the scene entrancing!^
beautiful.

"Bring consolation unto me,

Ye stars that shine so bright;
So shall I feel that mercy reigns
Above this realm of light 1"

I murmured sotto voce.

" What a perfect night ! It is like a foretaste of Para-
dise, and would almost make one satisfied with life,"
said my husband, who fortunately had not heard my
romantic citation, shielding his eyes with his hand and
looking seawards.

Reclining on a cane rocking-chair, I gazed abstract-
edly at the beautiful panorama which stretched before
me, one of my hands nervously twirling the big pearls
at my throat, the other toying with an Oriental cigarette
from which I now and again drew little clouds of smoke,
my feet resting on the back of a gigantic Russian blood-
hound who was lying asleep on the mosaic flooring of
the terrace.

Leaning my head back on the cushions of my chair,
I shook the ashes from my cigarette and turned my eyes,
from the surface of the waves which I had been con-
templating, upon the stalwart figure of my lord and
master, who stood lazily leaning over the wide balus-
trade. There was no use denying it, Karl was a mag-
nificent specimen of humanity, over six feet two in
height, broad-shouldered and slender-waisted, his blue
eyes, fair hair, blond mustache, and especially his em-
inently aristocratic, well-modelled features, making him
an object of undisguised feminine admiration wherever
he went. Moreover, his age sat very lightly upon
him, for he looked as if he were but barely twenty-
eight.

"I am afraid you are sleepy, Karl," I said with a sud-

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

den attempt at cheerfulness; "you are astonishingly
silent to-night/'

"No, I am not sleepy, but I was thinking of a man
whom I met to-day as I was walking home before dinner,
a man who craves the favor of being introduced to you,
and whom you will like, I believe, so I have asked him to
come to luncheon to-morrow."

" A man whom I will likel He must be quite a para-
gon, then, for you know that, if I dislike women, I do
not particularly like men either, except when they rec-
ommend themselves by really extraordinary personal
value. May I ask who this rara avis of yours is?"

" Certainly ; he is a young Scotchman of good fam-
ily and excellent breeding, intelligent, witty, talented,
and a very decent sportsman to boot — in short, your
old playmate, Freddie."

" Why, I thought he had gone for a tour round the
world, at least that is what I was told. How does he
come to be here?"

" Well, you see, his health gave way after his last
year in the Far East, and his physicians suggested the
trip you mention, but his diplomatic ambition would
not let him make up his mind to be away so long, and
he is trying what a few weeks will do for him here on
this well-named C6te d'Azur. "

" Is he a confirmed invalid, then?"

" No, not at all. He was once threatened with con-
sumption, I believe, but now his nervous system has
simply been overstrained by hard work and tropical
climates. There are also some family troubles, of which
you have no doubt heard. They have upset his equa-
nimity. He is a queer character, but somehow I like
him — after a fashion."

" I hope I will, too, for I know you well enough to real-
ize that you are about to enter upon one of your unques-

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tioning enthusiasms, and that I shall be satiated with
the presence of this highly interesting personage whom
I lost sight of when he was nineteen and I fourteen
years of age."

" What nonsense, Muzzi ! Of course, if he is disagree-
able to you, you need not ask him here again, but you
may as well see him once to please me without picking
him to pieces beforehand/'

" I certainly will do that with pleasure. But, my dear
Karl, if you have quite finished your rhapsodies about
Fred, let us go indoors. It is getting positively chilly,
and I am sure that it must be dreadfully late."

Karl picked up my fan and cigarette-box, my smell-
ing-salts and a cluster of wood violets which I had
allowed to drop in a confused tangle from my lap as I
rose, and followed me into the dimly lighted, spacious
hall where a fire of cedar logs was burning brightly on
the big hearth of carved porphyry. It was early in
March, and the nights were still very cold. Tea and
fruit and cold bouillon were brought to us, and we sat
chatting almost amicably until the great clock chimed
out the hour of twelve, and then we went up-stairs.

" I really wonder what kind of a person Fred has be-
come/' I mused, while trotting about in my dressing-
room next morning. "I hope he will not be a bore; it
would be too bad should Karl insist on my receiving
him often if he does not amuse me. Men should be
amusing or else very superior/'

I always frankly admit to myself, and to others as
well, that I do not like women, for I have no patience
with their small vanities, their lack of physical courage,
their continual efforts to please, their petty affectations,
and their delinquencies where loyalty and truthfulness
are concerned. The strong-minded woman, when I
happen to come across her, only arouses my most wither-

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

ing scorn, and I sincerely think that viragoes ought
to be put to death as a disgrace to their sex. Men I do
not like very much either, excepting, as I had told my
husband, when they distinguish themselves by ex-
traordinary talents or qualities. I despise flirtations
—a practice which I condemn as degrading — and to
this day I cannot cure myself of indulging in rather
merciless sarcasms, which overtake every one guilty
of pose, a defect which I particularly abhor.

Just as my chief-woman Johanna was putting the
finishing touches to my toilet, Karl knocked at the door
of my dressing-room. He always observed with me,
I am bound to confess, the forms of the most minute
courtesy,' treating me with that chivalrous deference
which a subject shows to his sovereign. He held in his
hand a large bunch of violets, and as he came towards
me he placed them on a table and then kissed my
hand in token of greeting.

" Your ponies have been waiting quite half an hour,
my dear," he said, with a smile, "and your groom begs
to know whether you intend to drive out before lunch-
eon."

"Of course I will; the ponies have not been out for
three days, and they will be sufficiently on their mettle
to satisfy even me."

Riding was still the exercise which pleased me best,
but I prided myself a little on my four-in-hand driving.
The western wind blew straight into my face as I drove
off over the sandy, tree-shadowed road along the shore.
The ponies pulled a good deal, but I enjoyed this, my
mastery being absolute over the four thoroughbred
creatures, whose glossy necks shone in the morning sun
like molten gold.

When I returned I found that the expected guest had
not arrived yet, so that I had ample time to exchange

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

my driving-suit for a gown of azure cloth, edged with
blue marabout tips, and I was in the best of humors
when I descended the broad, flower-laden staircase.

Guided by the sound of my husband's voice, I entered
the smallest of the three drawing-rooms on the ground
floor, and advanced with outstretched hand towards the
young man, who precipitately rose from his seat as I
appeared, and whom Karl now reintroduced to me.

One glance sufficed to show me that Fred had improved
greatly, and would perchance find grace before me after
all. Very tall, slender, and somewhat delicate-looking,
he was eminently distingue and aristocratic in his bear-
ing. Perchance there was a little shyness of manner,
but this was far from displeasing to me, for self-asser-
tion is to my mind a downright abomination. The
pleasing features, olive complexion, and dark hair of
the young man would have misled anybody with re-
gard to his nationality, and it was difficult to imagine
that he belonged to the proverbially fair-haired and
blue-eyed Anglo-Saxon race. His eyes were his best
point; they were very changeable in expression, the
eyelashes were long and thick, and this gave the regard
a languor and a charm very seldom seen in a man.

" A good, loyal, frank, soft-hearted boy/' was the in-
voluntary comment which I made inwardly, as I wel-
comed my visitor with more warmth than was my wont,
for a feeling of sympathy, slightly tinged with pity,
stole upon me as I noticed the thin cheeks and the wav-
ering color which overspread his face as I spoke to him.

"This room is insufferably warm/' I exclaimed, walk-
ing out, through one of the double glass doors, on to the
marble terrace where I had sat with my husband on the
preceding evening. Several cushioned lounging-chairs
surrounded a little Cairene bench, where cigars, ciga-
rettes, and a tiny cellaret were placed, among bowers of

220

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

tall azaleas and mimosas in full bloom, growing in
tubs of bronze.

The air was warm outside, also, but the striped awn-
ings which shaded the terrace preserved us from being
annoyed by the refraction of the noonday sun, and
the view was nearly as lovely as it had been at night
when seen by the light of the moon.

" The Riviera would have a far greater charm for me/'
I said to my guest, " if it did not look more and more, as
time goes on, like a picture on the top of some satin bon-
bon box. They have spoiled the landscape by dotting it
with too many villas, just as they have destroyed nature
all around by creating public parks, and gardens which
are planned in imitation of Egyptian, Indian, and South
American scenery. I am never perfectly satisfied here ;
there is too much sweetness, too many perfumes, too
much glare and too little simplicity. Now in Brittany
I am absolutely content and wholly pleased; our place
down there is my ideal of what a country residence should
be. It is very ancient, and it has descended to us from
an ancestor who lived many centuries ago. Of course
it contains all modern improvements, as the prospec-
tuses from real-estate agents term it, but still it has
preserved its cachet of antiquity, the boisterous, gray-
green waves of the Atlantic dash freely against its outer
bastions, and its solitude is priceless."

"But, surely, you have not become a misanthrope?"
exclaimed Fred, with ill-concealed astonishment.

" No, I trust that I am not anything bearing so ugly
a name, but yet I assure you that my happiest moments
have been spent in Brittany — or else in Russia or the
Tyrol. I hope that you will some day see our dear old
Breton vulture's nest, so that you may judge for your-
self whether my enthusiasm in that respect is not fully
justified."

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

" Invites you to come to Brittany?" laughed Karl,
stretching himself in his chair and lighting a cigarette.
"Well, that is an unusual honor. I am glad to see
that you are rapidly reassuming your old place in
her regard, Freddie."

At that moment Karl's valet brought him a card. He
glanced hastily at it, and then, turning to me, he said :
" Excuse me if I leave you to entertain our friend for a
few moments without my assistance. Henger has come
over to bring me his yearly accounts of the estates, and
I am going to tell him to postpone business until after
luncheon/' Whereupon he re-entered the house, call-
ing to Fred as he went : " I will not stay away longer
than I can help, but I do not pity you much for remain-
ing en tete-a-tete with Muzzi."

"What a delightful surname, and how well it suits
you," exclaimed Fred; "it is quaint, unique, original,
and charming, like yourself."

" What you say is very pretty, but I do not like com-
pliments, especially when they are made by intelligent
people. They can be forgiven to the usual run of men,
as being the small change with which they repay our
hospitality or our politeness. Do not think me rude if I
say this, but, as I hope to see you often under my roof,
wherever that roof may be, it is well that you should
be at once made acquainted with my fancies and whims. "

"How different you are from the child I remember
playing croquet with under the beautiful shade of your
aunt's celebrated trees," he said, wistfully, bending
forward to look at me intently.

"There is nothing strange in that," I replied, laugh-
ing. " I am quite a matron now ; besides, as you know,
I have not been brought up like other girls. My great-
est pleasures are to live in the open air, to ride, to drive,
to shoot, swim, row, read, paint, or at times to throw

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myself headlong into music, violently and whole-soul-
edly, as I do everything else, alas!"

" You do not mean to tell me that you do not like the
world and all its glamour?" he interrupted, with a du-
bious smile. "You, who are created to shine there,
and whose position makes you one of the queens of the
grand monde."

"There you are again! Oh! you are incorrigible;
you will insist upon throwing paving-stones at my
head. I like the world after a fashion — yes; I adore a
good waltz, a play acted by first-class 'stars'-, I enjoy
the gorgeous pageant of court-life, in a measure, but
I am not a mondaine ; no, ten thousand times no — not
in the general sense attached to the word. The world
expects one to wear continually a camisole de force. If
one of its idols presumes to act independently, without
anxiety about what it will think, that one is quaran-
tined, or used as a target to be shot at by the classes
and the masses, especially by one's best friends — for
these aim well, and hit the bull's-eye every time."

"Good Lord, you do not look at life with rosy-hued
spectacles."

" No ; I look at it as it is, which is not saying much in
its favor. But still I must confess that some clever
people know how to manage. Le monde I — le grand
monde bien entendu, I mean. Worldliness is like all
other fine arts ; it should be treated scientifically, and
the secret of such a science is to savoir se reprendre,
even if one occasionally gives one's self up to it for a
while."

"You are spiritually and intellectually an epicure,
I see, but it is difficult, when hearing you talk thus, to
realize how very young you are."

"Oh! my education has — been liberally completed.
I have ceased to gather daisies, voila tout I My illusions

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have fled, cher ami, which is perhaps to my advantage,
for reason never underlies any illusion, be it of what-
soever a kind."

He laughed a little sadly. " You are right, probably ;
but it is, nevertheless, a rooted custom with humanity
never to quite exclude a hope of better things to come/'

"Or a dread of worse ones/' I retorted, impatiently,
rising abruptly, for Karl was beckoning to us from one
of the numerous glass doors leading from the house to
the terrace, and the dull boom of the Chinese gong an-
nouncing lunch was calling us to that least interesting
of meals.

I noticed very easily during the course of that after-
noon that Fred was at once amused and pained by my
frequent little acid satires and ironies, and the puzzled
look in his soft, affectionate eyes seemed to contain at
times a certain reproach and regret. I felt tempted to
repeat to him some favorite lines of mine :

" J'ai vu le temps oft ma jeunesse
Sur mes levres 6tait sans cesse
Mais j'ai souffert un dur martyre,
Et le moins que j'en pourrais dire,
Si je Fessayais sur ma lyre
La briserait comme un roseau."

His visits were frequent to us after that day, and
when we left the South for the North he promised Karl
and myself to join us during the following hunting
season. Many months were, however, to elapse, and
many great events to take place before we saw each
other again.

That Karl was speedily wearying of my coldness, and
I fear of my ill-disguised repulsion, was not a cause of
sorrow to me, but of sincere relief. His conduct was
such as to wound and insult any wife, but I felt neither

224

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wounded nor insulted thereby. By his more and more
glaring infidelities he plainly showed that it was his nat-
ure to be unfaithful, and I only longed for an opportuni-
ty to loosen completely the sagging chains which still
bound him to me. This opportunity came sooner than I
expected, and came indeed in a rather nasty fashion, too,
but I am thankful to say that by some extraordinary mir-
acle my pride was saved, and I was able to avoid giving
my friends and acquaintances, as well as my enemies,
the chance of having a hearty laugh at my expense, or
even of knowing what supreme disgrace had befallen me.
Their contemptuous derision would have been hard to bear.

I one day promised, shortly after our return from the
Riviera, to go and dine with Princess T., who was resid-
ing for a few weeks at a charming chateau which she
owned, some five miles outside the city limits, and, as
was my custom on such occasions, I sent my dinner
dress there in the morning, proposing to ride over the
short distance accompanied by a groom later on.

Having advised Karl of my intentions, I was just
leaving my house when a telegram was handed to me.
The Princess had been taken suddenly ill, and the din-
ner was postponed, but as the weather was very tempt-
ing, I decided not to forego a gallop in the open coun-
try, and, thrusting the despatch in my pocket, I rode
off at a swinging trot, on the tan-bark altte reserved for
equestrians, in the direction of the river.

So magnificent was the day that I prolonged my tour
far beyond my first intention. In fact, it was almost
night when I dismounted at my own door-steps, and,
followed by the groom who carried my covert-coat, I
walked slowly up-stairs. It was the servant's supper
hour, so that the halls were deserted, especially as I had
given no counter orders about the evening, and was
not expected home. Softly and noiselessly we trod the
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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

carpets, as thick as moss. The lamps in the gallery
leading to my rooms were burning low, and we passed
on silently to where the door of Karl's bedchamber,
standing half open, cast a stronger ray of light at my
feet. Surprised at this illumination of a presumably
untenanted room — for he had told me that he would
dine at his club — I paused on the threshold, and then
recoiled with the surprise of what I saw almost into
the arms of the petrified groom who had also seen what
I had seen myself over my shoulder.

Unheard and unnoticed we hurried on. I was trem-
bling with rage from head to foot, but this was no time
for the indulgence of any personal feelings. L'honneur
du nom, that had to be saved, and swiftly I entered my
private library, drawing the English lad in after me
and shutting the door carefully.

"Bob/' I said, as calmly as I could, "I am not going
to offer you hush-money about this — this incident — I
think I can rely upon your discretion without resorting
to such means. Promise me that not a word will pass
your lips, and that I can appeal to your honor in this
matter as to that of a gentleman."

I had struck the right chord. The youth straight-
ened himself up to his full height — which was some-
thing below five feet — looked me full in the face with
his bonny blue British eyes, and, in a voice which
shook very much, declared that he would "rather be
struck dead " than betray my confidence.

"That is right, Bob; I believe you; "and then I held
out my hand to him and shook his with a sense of
genuine gladness at his honesty and quasi- childlike
but, withal, manly earnestness. That boy was, I knew,
as white as white could be. God bless him for it !

Once alone, I hastily determined to have a final,
conclusive, and immediate explanation with Karl. I

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the bell and told my maid, who was amazed to find
me there, to request my husband's confidential valet — a
great rogue and a traitor if ever there was one — to advise
his master that I should like to speak to him at once.

A few moments later Karl entered. His face was
singularly pale, and his eyes avoided mine.

"How do you come to be here?" he asked, a little
breathlessly. " I thought that you were dining out?"

"I know you did/' I replied, meaningly, although I
spoke firmly, in a low voice, and without a trace of vio-
lence.

"Why do you say that in such a tone?" he said, ar-
rogantly, vainly attempting to regain his usual self-
confidence.

" I think that you know why," I said, in the same cold,
ironical manner. "I have now all my rights to leave
you if I choose — in fidelity sous le toit conjugal et tutti
quanti — and what an infidelity ! — with a serving-maid,
' monseigneur,' " I added, looking at him as if he had been
a leper, for my patience was beginning to give way;
" but I loathe scandal, and my wrongs will not be spread
by me before the world. I will not fall into such help-
less folly ; I care for my honor, and for yours, too, in an
odd way. No, do not interrupt me ; it is useless ; I must
speak at last, and let you know what our future will
henceforth be. Good Heavens, how little you know me!
Do you think that I was not aware of the ignominy of
your conduct? What fools men are, and what dolts!
But now you have overstepped all bounds, you have
passed the barriers which no gentleman should ever
pass, you have behaved like a brute, and I am not
inclined to condone such an offence, such an insult!
Hear me out, if you please. From this moment you
and I are strangers; we will continue to live together
in order to blind the world to the true state of our affairs.

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But never dare to approach me again when I am alone,
or, God forgive me, I will kill you."

An exceeding f aintness came over me, and I staggered
slightly. He seized his opportunity, and, in the utter
weakness of the domination which I had momentarily
obtained over him, he began to plead his own cause,
humbly enough — nay, cravenly and, in my opinion,
revoltingly. But my blood was on fire. I came from
a race who had never lightly brooked insult or pitied
cowardice, and his lame and paltry excuses acted as a
revivifying tonic upon me. By a great effort I re-
strained the bitter rage and the boundless scorn I felt
for him, and I let the torrent of his words pass un-
heeded.

At last, when he came to a close, I merely said : " Now
that I have heard you, I can tell you that my resolve is
by no means changed. Be good enough to go; leave
me to myself; it will be best so."

"Good Heavens, madame," he almost shouted, "do
you think that I am going to submit to your rule? Do
you, for one instant, imagine that I will give you up,
that I will cease to be your husband in everything but
in name. Do you really believe that I will run the risk
of seeing my union with you remain barren on account
of your whims?"

This was too much. I burst into uncontrollable laugh-
ter, a veritable fou-rire, which shook me as a hurricane
might a plant.

"Your insolence is wellnigh inconceivable/' I ex-
claimed, as soon as I could speak. " Oh! you madman,
are you trying to persuade me that you love me, or that
family ties and joys are of value to you? No I No!
I see more clearly than you think. You merely fear
ridicule, because you presume that the odium of your
ways will become public property. You need not fear.

228

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

I know how to keep silent, and silence in this instance
means as much to me, and more, than it does to you."

He stared at me with gloomy amaze, but I pursued,
unheeding : " It is difficult for you to believe in silence
and in discretion, because you possess none of these
small virtues — you whom society has nicknamed ' Will-
iam Tell'."

" That is false. None but a cur ever speaks — of cer-
tain things."

"Possibly; draw your own conclusions about so-
ciety's verdict, then. And as to the barrenness of our
union, it may serve to make you pass for a very learn-
ed and intellectual man, for if it be ever mentioned to
you, you can quote Shakespeare, and say of us —

" Leaving no posterity —
'Twas not their infirmity,
It was married chastity."

" Excuse my levity ; it is out of place, possibly ; but, to
tell you the truth, if I am erring now in taste and wis-
dom, it is thanks to the relief which the prospect of being
r\d of my wifely obligations towards you gives me. I
have long ached to free myself from the incubus of your
so-called love. I have wondered, wondered, wondered,
why men like you should exist at all, and why fate should
have been so cruel to me. My heart has grown sick
with apprehension and aversion whenever I heard the
sound of your step outside my door. Are you satisfied
now that I have told you this ? I have tried to bear calm-
ly the horrible disgrace which such a love was to me.
You thought that I did not feel ; you were mistaken. I
have suffered — oh! God of Heaven, how I have suffered!
You found me cold, perchance stupid, and I was glad
when you did so, because I did not care to let you see the
disdain, the disgust I have for you. My silence arose

229

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

from a mistaken sense of duty and from pride as well.
If I had dragged what you are pleased to facetiously
call your honor through the filthiest mire of Europe,
it would have been no more than 3rou deserved, but I
have other ideas on such matters, and I hold my dignity
high aloft, whatever you may please to do with your
own. For the last time I repeat it now, go ! I cannot
bear the sight of you. Later we will meet in public as
if nothing had happened, but for the present spare me
the insult of your presence."

With sullen, scowling, irresistible subjection, he went,
and I, shuddering and unnerved, remained face to face
with the beginning of a new life — a life which I could
make pure at last and cleanse from all the miseries of
my union with such a man.

The modus vivendi which I forced Karl to accept —
not without several instances of violent protest on his
part, for his vanity was intensely hurt and he cruelly
resented having been cornered — finally became an es-
tablished institution; our intercourse was reduced to a
mere courteous anned truce, and I avoided with scrupu-
lous care ever seeing him alone. We filled our houses
with guests, went out together often, and continued to
be cited as a model couple, which was a mercy indeed,
and of an intense but amusing irony. But apart from
that, we could not have been more disconnected if we
had been barely bowing acquaintances crossing the
ocean on the same steamer. In fact, although no one
ever, save one or two people, entertained any doubt
about our perfect accord, the truth is that we managed
to keep two distinctly separate establishments under
the same roof -tree, which was what I had desired and
achieved.

Soon, however, war and noises of war filled the land,
and our own personal troubles were absorbed and

230 -

I

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINC1

merged into those of thousands of human beings
struggling on bloody battle-fields.

Two great powers came to blows, and some smaller
ones became hot-headed and rebellious. Fanaticism,
misgovernment, misappropriation, were stated as valid
excuses for all the horrors that came to pass, and then
another great country — my adopted one — interfered,
and marched many troops beyond the boundary-line of
the empire. During the months that followed there
was some terrible assumption of international respon-
sibility, brave men fought and brave men died, reckless
commanders played an uphill game, and won it, tool
Ill-disciplined, half-savage, but well-armed hordes did
much havoc, and bands of hill-robbers pot-shotted our
soldiers most grewsomely.

The rapid march of events fired me with enthusiasm
for the courage displayed everywhere, and filled me with
pity for all the misery so nobly endured ; and when Karl
was ordered to join the conflicting armies and to take
up a command there, I decided to go too, in spite of
great opposition. I not only succeeded in gaining my
piont, but two of my friends, Princess T. and Princess
W., filled with a spirit of emulation, joined me in this
rash venture, and wre set off to do some army nursing
and some sort of soldiering as well, adorned with the
insignia of the Red Cross on our campaigning, semi-
military, and very serviceable garments.

The restless feverishness of warfare was upon me;
I was full of dash and energy, and I had sometimes to
pinch myself in order to realize that I was not dreaming,
that I was not in reality a soldier, but merely a tiny bit
of a woman, so bent on combat did I feel.

It seems anomalous to say it, but those long weeks
spent among wounded, sick, disabled, and festering
humanity count among the happiest of my whole exist-

231

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

ence. Heedless of the roar of artillery, the call of the
bugles, the groans of the dying, I pursued my self-
imposed task with strange cheerfulness, braced by
the delicious feeling that for once I was being of some
use.

I quickly grew accustomed to the stench and turmoil
of the champ de bataille. The humming of bullets —
which I at first mistook for the buzzing of bees — was
not unpleasing to my ears, and it would seem as if the
old proverb, which says, "Bon sang ne pent mentir,"
had some truth in it, for my pulses beat all the quicker
when the conflict was at its worst. I was never tired,
and no hardships seemed to touch me, for I rode inde-
fatigably over field and furrow, hill and dale, moun-
tain and plain, collecting prostrate bodies and limbs,
and caring for the wounded, who were, alas, frequently
left to rot in their own blood, so great was the slaughter.
I must, in justice to myself, state that there was no
bravado in any of my actions, and confess, at the risk
of passing for a heartless wretch, that I liked it all.
So here goes another proverb — "Bon chien chasse de
race." It may explain much — for instance, the fact
that a soldiering spirit makes it possible to live happily
in the close proximity of death. I saw sights that were
simply hellish, overshadowed by the smoke of rifles
and of cannons; my ears were deafened by the awful
and perpetual growl of heavy firing, and yet I liked it.
A great throb of my heart occasionally choked me, but
again I would shout incoherently like a youthful demon
for which haut-fait I experienced momentary pangs of
shame, and my soul would melt within me with sorrow-
ful regret for so many victims of their own heroism,
lying prostrate under the glowing sky, which looked
as if it had caught the reflection of the gore-soaked
earth.

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After so many years I wake now sometimes in the
darkness of the night and long for the excitement and
the fiery enthusiasm of those days :

" I dream of dead and gory days ;
Could I but hear, could I but hear,
The trumpets blare, to carnage calling,

Then to the saddle would I spring.
My mettled steed with joy bestriding,

I'd haste to join the noble ring
Of soldiers who to fight are riding."

CHAPTER XV

* Vater, ich rufe Dich,

Briillend umwolkt mich der Dampf der Geschutze,
Spriihend umzucken mich rasselnde Blitze;
Lenker der Schlachten, ich rufe Dich]
Vater, du fiihre mich!

* Gott, Dir ergeb' ich mich,
Wenn mich die Dormer des Todes begriissen,
Wenn meine Adern geoffnet fliessen;

Dir, mein Gott, Dir ergeb' ich michj
Vater, ich rufe Dichl"

"ONE, two, three, four," counted the major as the
wounded were brought in and tenderly deposited upon
the bundles of straw which were to serve as couches un-
til the moment came for the poor wretches to be operated
upon. The wind blew fiercely, and shook the canvas
sides of the large tent, under the folds of which rows
upon rows of uncomfortable little truckle-beds were
literally packed, while heavy showers of rain sounded
like hail above our heads.

It was by no means an easy or a pleasant task to take
care of all these poor mangled soldiers under such un-
favorable circumstances, but I hated to acknowledge
even to myself that I had undertaken a very heavy bur-
den with regard to this bloody campaign, where we had
to fight as best we could against the numerous and al-
most insurmountable difficulties placed in the way of
conscientious sick-nurses, who have to dispense with
all the conveniences and even the necessities of an or-
dinary hospital. We were often left without chloro-

234

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

I

form, without ice, of course, without beef-tea, or even,
for the matter of that, without any nourishing food at
all for our patients. Blankets were a luxury, and,
as to lint and linen bandages, we had to exercise
the utmost ingenuity to procure the best possible sub-
stitutes therefor.

"Five, six, seven, eight/' continued the major, in a
stentorian voice, which was nevertheless almost drowned
by the sullen booming of the cannon echoing from the
hills on our left.

" It is to be hoped that they are not going to kill our
sick and wounded under the very shadow of the Red
Cross flag/' he snarled furiously, for the cannonading
and fusillade rose louder and louder as it closed in upon
us from all sides.

The situation was serious. The battle which had
lasted since early in the morning had as yet by no means
abated, although it was now half past four in the after-
noon. Moreover, on this bleak plateau, where our am-
bulance tents were pitched, we were not properly protect-
ed, and in case of a defeat we had but little mercy to ex-
pect from the savage enemy, who, it was reported, were
destroying everything wearing our uniform, whether
prisoners, disabled combatants, or even corpses. Sor-
rowfully I stood watching the orderlies as they lifted the
wounded from the ambulance-cart and sheltered them
quickly from the downpouring rain. So absorbed was
I in this pitiful spectacle that I started violently upon
hearing my name called loudly by the major.

"What is the matter?" I cried, running towards him.

"Matter?" he growled; "why, everything is the mat-
ter. Here I am without assistants, and obliged to
perform goodness knows how many operations single-
handed. And, what is worse, I'll be hanged if I know
whether the chloroform will go round. "

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

This was certainly an ugly state of affairs, and I did
not wonder at the major's moody face and brusqueness
of speech. Brusque he always was more or less, this
excellent doctor — or major, as all military physicians
and surgeons are called in Europe, because this rank
belongs to them by right — but still I had never seen so
forbidding an expression nor so sombre a look on his
much weather-beaten countenance. Greatly concerned,
I caught his arm, and, looking up in his perturbed face,
which towered so high in the air above me — the major
prided himself on being the tallest medical man in the
army — I said on the impulse of the moment :

" Let me help you with the operating part of it ; you
know that I have gained some little experience since
I have been here, and — I am not nervous and never get
tired."

A smile broke upon his lips, displaying two rows of
dazzling white teeth, and he answered, more gently:
" That's very true, but do you know what the physical
fatigue of such an undertaking means? I have often
seen men, hale and strong, give in on such occasions ;
and you — poor, little, delicate, slender creature — want
to help me in my ghastly butcher's work?"

I laughed, so comical was the earnestness of his pro-
test. "Have you anything better to suggest?" I said,
impatiently. "We have now here only two Sisters of
Mercy, who have more than they can attend to with
the soldiers already operated upon. Princess W. and
Princess T. have been sent for to assist in nursing the
patients down in the valley, and the orderlies do not
possess sufficient intelligence to be of any efficient use to
you, so you see that my offer is not so silly, after all."

For a few moments he gazed at me with undisguised
astonishment. Then he said, with a shrug of his heavy
shoulders: "We might try it; I'm infernally sorry to

236

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

be forced to accept this new sacrifice from you, but I iv, ; il-
ly don't see what else I can do. It will be a rough ex-
perience for so young a hand, but you can get ready
if you will be so kind ; take one of my aprons, for there
will be lots of dirty work, and look out that you don't
faint. I have no time to spare in reviving you. "

I shuddered slightly, for his words implied that, how-
ever hardened I believed myself to be, I was on the point
of a new experience. Of course, I had seen many serious
operations since the beginning of the campaign, and I
had dressed many repulsive wounds, but I began to
realize that my attempt at practical surgery was likely
to be fraught with quite another kind of hardship than
what I had already gone through. Notwithstanding, I
set my teeth, and ran to get ready, according to the
major's advice, and a pretty sight I looked with his
gigantic apron tucked up under my chin and my
sleeves rolled almost to the shoulder, for all the world
as if I were about to undertake some difficult culinary
operation instead of a great many grewsome surgical
ones.

When I re-entered the main tent I must confess that I
felt uncommonly like running away again, without so
much as giving the odious place another look. By
means of some sail-cloth, or canvas, or whatever it may
have been, the upper portion thereof had been partitioned,
and a long table, covered with rubber sheeting of ques-
tionable cleanliness, had been placed in the middle of
this miniature amphitheatre. Near by on a stand were
laid out in disordered array every sort of surgical in-
strument from a saw to some vicious-looking pincers,
together with sponges and a provision of lint and ab-
sorbent cotton.

On the table lay a poor devil, whose face, as white as
linen, bore an expression of the most terrified appre-

237

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

hension, while the doctor was saturating a small cloth
with chloroform. Nerving myself to stand whatever
would follow, I modestly approached, and, in a voice
which I endeavored to steady, I reported in all due form
that I was ready for work.

The major, without lifting his head, said in the most
matter-of-fact manner possible : " Do you know how to
administer chloroform?"

I gazed helplessly at him, and then shamefacedly ad-
mitted that my hand was as yet untried at so ticklish a
job, although I had, to be sure, often seen it done. In a
few short words he explained to me what I was to do,
and although I trembled in a way that disgusted me, I
set to work to carry out his instructions to the best of my
ability.

In spite of the attention which I was giving to my
task, I could not help casting an occasional glance at
the horrors surrounding us upon all sides. The aspect
of the whole place had become really terrible. Unceas-
ingly the wounded were being carried in, and as there
had long since been no more room on the hastily ar-
ranged beds, a couple of orderlies were scattering more
bundles of straw on the floor to lay the groaning, mis-
erable remnants of humanity upon as they arrived
from the battle-field in a continual procession.

Moans of heartrending anguish filled the air, and in
a corner a very young soldier, fair-haired and delicately
built, kept up a soft, pleading murmur of entreaty, in-
expressibly painful to hear, calling upon his mother,
poor fellow, to come and take his pain away. Wounds
which had been too summarily dressed by inexperienced
ambulance-men had come undone, and nothing can
give an idea of the aspect presented by the poor suf-
ferers, torn and bleeding, their uniforms all covered
with mud, and their faces so drawn, pinched, and hag-

238

I

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

gard in the dim afternoon light of this stormy day,
yet displaying still the thrilling enthusiasm of ardent
fighters.

The patient on the table having in the meanwhile
succumbed to the vapors of the chloroform, and the
major being quite ready, we began the risky operation
which is known to men of science under the name of
" disarticulation of the shoulder by the method of Lis-
franc." It is what surgeons are pleased to call a " neat
and clean operation" or "quick and dainty" as they
have it, for a good operator can accomplish it in forty-
five seconds. It may be that I was not scientific enough
to appreciate its beauties, however, for I saw nothing
" dainty" in the butchering of the wretched man whose
livid head was pillowed upon my arm. I tried vainly
to look another way, but wherever my eyes fell there
was nothing but misery and distress of the worst de-
scription to be seen, and I could not help gazing with a
kind of unaccountable fascination on "my patient,"
who was now propped up in a sitting posture, by the
orders of the major, and held fast between myself and a
burly ambulancier. This assistant fortunately knew
more about the work than I did, for when the major
seized the deltoid muscle, transpierced the arm with
his long, narrow-bladed knife, and detached the joint
— all that in three masterly movements — the assistant
needed no prompting to close the severed arteries with
his thumbs, while the anxious surgeon was fixing the
ligatures.

"Ah!" cried the major, "that is all right! I venture
to bet that it didn't take me over forty seconds to do/'
I said nothing, for if the truth be known, I was feeling
extremely sick, but pride came to my aid, and I even
made a pretence of admiring the swift and business-like
fashion in which he drew down and secured the "flap/'

239

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

like a flat epaulette, although it was, to me at least,
by no means a welcome spectacle.

" Do you know, madame," the major continued, " that
there is always an immediate danger of death when one
places a patient under the influence of chloroform in a
sitting posture, and that, if proper care be not taken,
all the blood can run out of the body in four minutes
through the humoral artery."

No, I did not know all these interesting details, and
although much obliged to the major for disclosing them
to me, I did not lend him my undivided attention, for the
patient was regaining consciousness, and I felt too deep
a sympathy for him to be able to listen to technicalities.
For a moment he cast a bewildered look upon the objects
around him; then, catching sight of his severed arm,
which still lay upon the operating-table, he glanced at
his mutilated shoulder, and, to my intense dismay, he
burst into a passion of tears.

"Halloo, my man/' cried the doctor, "don't take on
so; you are all right now." But the poor devil refused
to be consoled, and it was pitiful to hear him murmur
in a feeble, broken voice : " What do you want me to
do now? How can I work to keep my wife and child
from starving?"

I confess that I was nearly overcome, and even the
major knit his brows and looked as glum as an owl. But
we had no time to waste on talk, for on all sides agonized
voices were imploring the doctor to "please come" and
attend to their injuries.

The hours had fled, and now it was so dark that, in
spite of the few oil-lamps which had been procured with
difficulty, we hardly saw what we were about.

" Confound this hellish gloom," exclaimed the major,
who rarely swore, and I understood his irritation, feel-
ing that but for a little more I would be reduced to

240

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

imitate his force and pictuivsqueness of language. By
the aid of two ambulance lamps we succeeded, however,
in obtaining sufficient light to continue the operations.

One after the other, legs, arms, fingers, toes, were
amputated. Horrible scalp wounds, caused by the
broad-bladed swords of our formidable opponents, were
stitched up, and still we saw no end to our task.

I was so tired that I did not feel my limbs any longer,
and a thirst, such as I had never experienced, parched
my throat and mouth. I honestly believe that by this
time the major had entirely forgotten who and what I
was, for he ordered me about as he would any of his
ordinary dressers.

Fortunately I have always been able to adapt myself
quickly to circumstances, so that I had rapidly become
acquainted with the services required of me. I now
made no mistakes while handing him the instruments
he required, nor when helping him in every other sort
of way. How he could go on slicing, cutting, sawing,
and stitching, in the manner he did, is to this day a mys-
tery to me, and I am sure that he must have been made
of iron, for the strain was something awful !

Towards midnight, all at once, he looked up from a
frightfully mangled arm he was excising, and, noticing
my face — a very pale one I presume — he said something
to an orderly. The latter rushed off and soon returned
carrying a pannikin filled with spirits, and water and a
couple of biscuits.

" Take that," said my old friend, peremptorily, "you'll
faint by-and-by if you don't."

I thanked him and tried to munch a tiny bit of the
biscuit, but could not manage to swallow a single morsel.
The brandy-and-water, strange as it seemed to me to
drink it, did me infinite good; it put new life into me
and gave me strength to continue my exertions.

241

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

The rain had ceased, and outside the stars were shin-
ing above the solemnly still world. The silence was
doubly solemn after the deafening cannonading of the
day. I stretched myself wearily, and prepared every-
thing for a new operation, for the orderlies had just
brought us a young cavalry officer, whose blood-soaked
dolman and nerveless attitude told their own tale. His
eyes were closed, and his features were covered with
powder, blood, and mud. I began to rub the grime away
with a wet towel, when, to my horror, I recognized in
this maimed and crushed human being, who had well-
nigh lost all semblance of human appearance, young
Count C., the darling of a doting, widowed mother, a
boy whom I had known all my life.

"Major," I called out, "see who this is I Just think
of his poor mother!"

"So it is, so it is," replied he, shaking his big head
sadly, for he, too, knew the brave and dashing young
officer well.

" Why was he not brought here as soon as he arrived?"
he grumbled. " How can I do anything for him now,
after so many hours? Why, the boy is almost gone
from mere loss of blood."

The wound — at least the principal one — was below
the knee, and the major cried to the orderly to cut the
trousers and underclothes as quickly as possible. When
this was done the leg appeared in all its horror. The
bones had been, so to speak, pulverized, and there was
above the ankle a great gaping hole from which the
muscle emerged like pulp. The young Count, by this
time, had recovered consciousness, and, glancing from
the major to me — without showing further astonish-
ment at seeing us there — said, smiling feebly : " They
have done for me nicely, have they not? I am afraid
there will be no more dancing for me now, Muzzi."

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

No, indeed, poor fellow 1 1 1 is dancing days were over.
In fact, I saw by the major's anxious expression and
knitted brow that he considered him as good as dead
already. The latter felt the injured limb, and, finding
it ice-cold and pulseless, gave vent to a low whistle which
boded trouble. The patient, in spite of his exhausted
<:< uulition, noticed all this, too, and murmured, listlessly :

" A bad case, eh, major? Better slice it off at once
and have done with it."

Slice it off — cripple this handsome youth for life,
even if he managed to pull through the ghastly opera-
tion ! What a frightful thing war is ! I shuddered as I
moistened the parched lips and wiped the cold sweat
from his pallid face.

"I was going to propose the amputation to you, sir,
and I am happy to see that you have resigned yourself
to it," the surgeon said, very gently, all his brusqueness
gone before so much quiet courage. "The sooner the
better, you know; so if you have no objection we will
proceed at once with the necessary evil."

" Oh yes, go ahead," replied the boy ; " but may I ask
a favor?"

"Anything you ask will be done. What is it you
wish?"

"Simply that you should stay by me to the end."
This was said to me with such a look of almost diffi-
dent entreaty that I was quite overcome and cquld
hardly steady my voice sufficiently to answer : " Stay
with you? Yes, of course I will stay with you, my
>r dear. You know that I will, and save you, too,
if devoted nursing can accomplish it. "

The preparations did not take long. Already I had
seized the chloroform while the surgeon turned to his
tableful of instruments. I went through my share
of the horrible affair like one in a dream, as though it

243

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

were the last drop which was likely to make my cup of
fatigue and nervous exhaustion overflow. But I was
obliged to rally my sinking strength, for at the very
moment when the operation was over and the orderly
was bearing off the severed leg, the Count opened his
eyes, and, in order to avoid his witnessing this last act
of the tragedy, I began to talk to him with all the anima-
tion and volubility I could summon up.

Shortly afterwards I found myself in the farthest cor-
ner of the ambulance tent, watching beside the bed
where he had been laid. Operating was over, at least
for that night, and I was trying to redeem my promise,
although the condition of the patient gave me but little
hope of being able to pull him through, as I had assured
him that I would. The major had begged me hard to
sleep for a few hours at least, undertaking to relieve
me of all care during that time, but I felt that it would be
impossible for me to attempt anything of the kind after
all the excitement of the day ; the unusual fatigue and
the terrible anxiety weighed me down, on account of
the precious life intrusted to my care, and my care alone
— as I thought, at least — for was not the poor fellow a
dear friend of all time?

My patient had dropped into an uneasy doze, troubled
only too often by the moans of all the suffering hu-
manity about us. Suddenly his eyes opened wide, for
an instant he cast a glance of terror about him, then,
in a voice of shocking agony, he said, despairingly :

" I think I am going to die — come to me — let me hold
your hand."

I knelt beside his rude little couch, fondling him as
if he had been a baby, and calling him by those endear-
ing names which mothers use to their sick children in
order to soothe their pain. At that moment I truly
forgot that he was a stalwart cavalry officer, with a pair

244

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

of fair mustaches which had worked havoc in many a
feminine heart, and remembered him only as the com-
panion with whom I had played in former days. His
large blue eyes, so soft, heavy, and languid, were fixed
on me with the regret of the life that he was about to
lose clearly printed in their fast-glazing orbs.

"I am cold — cold," he muttered.

I threw my arms about him with the vague instinct
that I could help him. He shut his eyes only to quickly
open them again in the same startled manner as before.

"Say a prayer," he gasped, and almost mechan-
ically I repeated the sublime words of our Catholic last
blessing for the dying: "Per sacrosancta humana re-
partionis mysteria remittat tibi omnipotens. Deus om-
nes." The words left my lips incoherently, for I was
watching the last struggle of the departing soul with
its earthly envelope. Gradually the features relaxed,
the fair head fell back against my arm, and, with a
sort of sob, the spirit took its flight.

I think that after this last shock I must have lost con-
sciousness for a few minutes. The next thing I remem-
ber was lying half across the miserable little hospital
bed. I rose to my feet, reverently closed the eyes of the
dead boy, and then stood irresolute, not knowing what
to do next.

The long, low, canvas-roofed ambulance, lighted only
by a few smoky lamps, looked dismal indeed, while the
heavy breathing of the slumbering wounded sounded
from the deep shadows. I knew that there was no use in
arousing my friend the major from his valiantly earned
sleep to acquaint him with dismal news which it would
be quite time enough to tell him in the morning. So I
drew the coarse sheet over Count C/s face, and, dazed
and dizzy, I sank down upon the floor between his bed
and that of a corporal of an infantry regiment who had

245

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

been brought in earlier in the evening with a bullet- hole
through his lungs and other injuries yet more serious.
One of our Sisters of Mercy had come every hour to
moisten his lips and to look at the dressing of his
wounds, but now she was busy elsewhere, and he him-
self seemed to have fallen into a deep sleep.

Supporting my back against my dead playmate's
little bed, and with my hands listlessly crossed in my
lap, I let my eyes wander from one scene of misery to
another. In the midst of my gloomy observations I was
overpowered by all I had gone through, and, in spite
of sorrow and of aching bones, I dropped into a stupe-
fied slumber.

I dreamed all manner of confused things. I was
fighting, struggling with scores of enemies; then a
huge rock seemed to fall upon me from the top of a
mountain, and I was vainly attempting to disengage
myself from under its killing weight. I screamed, but
the cry was strangled in my throat. Again I raised
my voice loudly, and the sound of it awoke me. Was
all this a dream? Was I really being crushed by some
awful mass? My cry aroused two orderlies, and the
major himself, who came rushing towards me. I vague-
ly remember their discussing my mishap. I felt them
removing the weight from my breast, and then I sank
again into confused visions and dreams.

Later I was told what had happened, and a shiver
runs through my veins to this day when I think of it.
When resistless sleep had conquered me, the wound-
ed corporal, striving, in the throes of his last terrible
agony, to free himself from that unconquerable grip
which takes hold of us all alike when our time has
come, had fallen from his bed upon me.

# # # # * * *

It was during that campaign that I began to find out

246

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

that to help others in their trouble is the best way to
lighten one's own burdens, and I was sincerely glad
that we had gained j)crinission to go with the troops
to the field of war. Protected by the Red Cross badge
of the "Convention de Gendve," we seldom ran the risk
of any actual danger, and, so far as privations were
concerned, we did not mind them at all. This ex-
traordinary declaration, coming from us who had been
brought up in the lap of luxury, and who had not the
faintest idea of what privations really meant, caused
our friends to smile at our simplicity at the time it was
uttered. But we were all three in perfect health, and
firmly resolved to succeed ; so we had finally succeeded.
" Ce que femme veut, Dieu le veut," is a French proverb
which has more than once proved only too true.

Our first weeks of campaigning were devoted to nurs-
ing the sick and tending the wounded. In spite of all
that may be said to the contrary by idealists, it is not
a pleasant task, and many a time have I quaked at the
sight of some strong young soldier crippled for life by
the bullets of the enemy or killed outright like my friend
Count C. Habit, however, is a great master, and with
time and several such experiences as the one above re-
lated, I became so well used to life in camp ambulances
that I ended by really considering myself to be as cool
and collected in the accomplishment of my self-imposed
duties as any hardened army surgeon among us, and
enjoyed them, if I am again to tell the naked truth !

No country on the face of our unfortunate planet has
been more ravaged, no land more often soaked with the
blood of its inhabitants, than that portion of Europe
which our troops were occupying. Everything around
us had been desolated by fire and bloodshed as severely
as during the first invasion of the barbarians, hundreds
of years before. Very grand, but very dreary and sad,

247

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

was the landscape with its wonderful denies and its
high mountains enclosing rushing streams. The sand-
stone rocks, worn by erosion into fantastic forms wor-
thy of Gustave Dora's pencil, took in the twilight, and at
early dawn, the shape of huge dragons, lions, or other
equally startling - looking objects. Then came great
deserted plains, with here and there cottages built of clay
on foundations of dry, loose stones covered with pieces
of wood, little forsaken dwellings from which the inhabi-
tants had fled in terror. It was difficult to procure food
for the army, for the culture is always poor in this
wild land, and everything available had been pillaged.

For the first time in my life I knew what hunger meant.
An experience of that kind is liable to make one forever
afterwards feel very charitably inclined towards the
unfortunates who claim one's mercy on the plea of star-
vation.

Strange as it may appear, however, I had never felt
better than during these months of privation and fatigue.
Many a time, after being the whole day in the saddle, I
slept on the bare ground, with nothing to protect me from
the sharp night air excepting a rough military cloak,
or else curled up against my reclining horse, and slept
far better than under the velvet and lace canopy of my
soft bed at home.

Just in the same manner did I relish a crust of
soldier's hard bread, and a mess of more than ques-
tionable soup, eaten beside the bivouac fires with a
ravenous hunger as an appetizer. Everybody was so
courteous and considerate too. Those uneducated men
of our army, although certainly roughened by the wild
life of soldiers on active service, were always ready to
'give up their own scant comforts in order to add to mine,
had I been disposed to allow them to do so. As it was,
I had many a hard fight with my patients, so anxious

248

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

were they to share with me the thin beef-tea or sup of
wine which it was so difficult to procure for them. But
enough of this, or my reminiscences will carry me so
far as to weary my readers.

Shortly after the defeat of the enemy by our forces, at
the most important and hotly contested point, our bri-
gade was camping at the foot of some high and precipi-
tous cliffs, one regiment being separated from the army
corps by a superb defile of steep rocks. It was the most
romantic site imaginable, plentifully wooded with oaks,
beeches, and elms, but the excessively narrow road
winding between the cliffs was strangely grewsome in
its loneliness and awe-inspiring grandeur.

One afternoon I had ridden over from our camp, a dis-
tance of ten miles or so, to the other side of the defile,
where Princess T. was doing her share of nursing. It
was nearly dusk when I ordered my horse to be brought
round, intending to ride back to camp before night. I
refused the escort which the general in command most
kindly and urgently pressed me to accept, for I knew
that I would be far safer alone than when accompanied
by soldiers wearing the hated uniform of the army of
occupation. Besides, as I have, I fear, betrayed long
ere this, I was absurdly romantic in those days, and I
considered it more chivalrous on my part not to expose
my fellow-creatures to the bullets and yatagans of the
dreaded foe who were known to be always in ambush
in the mountain passes.

After having succeeded in persuading the general of
my perfect safety, I mounted my black charger " Dare-
Devil," and was about to start off at a brisk canter, when
the dear old general, putting his hand on the pommel of
my saddle and coming close to me, whispered : " Take
care, my dear child. It would never do for you to be
caught carrying despatches." I laughed gayly, to re-

249

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

assure him, still I knew full well how true his words were.
It would very likely mean nothing short of death to me.
The fact was that, seeing me determined to ride back to
camp alone, the commander, who thought that a woman
protected by the brassard of the Red Cross stood a better
chance of passing unharmed through the defile than
any member of his staff, had intrusted to me a despatch
of the utmost importance. It was written in cipher on
a tiny scrap of flimsy paper, and, rolling it tightly, I had
inserted it in the woodcock quill which was so jauntily
stuck on the band of my military cap.

As I rode along in the gathering gloom I glanced once
or twice at the two little revolvers in my holsters with a
feeling of confidence and satisfaction, for I was, all boast-
ing apart, a neat shot, and I believed that I was perfectly
capable of defending myself if attacked. The trouble,
however, was that those terrible mountaineers lay in
hiding behind the jutting rocks, and that their mode of
attack consisted in shooting the unsuspecting travellers
who ventured through the mountain passes like so many
rabbits in a warren, or sometimes in swiftly pouncing
upon them from their places of concealment and making
them prisoners before they had time to defend them-
selves.

The road was frightfully rough and uneven, for it was
but the dried-up bed of a mountain torrent, full of sharp
stones and bits of yellow quartz. I picked my way
carefully in the fast-fading evening light, much to the
disgust of my fretful young horse, who passaged from
side to side in an uncomfortable manner. Fortunately,
as I reached the beginning of the defile, the moon, like
a huge golden lamp, rose from behind the mountains,
lighting up the path with dazzling brilliancy, but leav-
ing the steep rock-walls and densely wooded, precipi-
tous slopes on both sides in inky darkness. This made

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

matters less difficult for me, but still I could not take
great advantage of this favorable circumstance or give
my impatient mount his head, for I realized that should
any sharp-shooters be lying in wait behind these dark
ramparts, anything like flight on my part would surely
hasten my fate.

Never before had I observed how loud a noise is pro-
duced by the hoofs of a horse on hard ground. It seemed
to me as if all the mountain echoes had been awakened
by " Dare-Devil's " really elastic step. Again and again
I peered first on one side, and then on the other, imag-
ining that this unearthly " ra-ta-ta" would at every
moment bring something peculiarly disagreeable and
undesirable about my ears. I cannot say that I was
exactly frightened, as I was never much of a coward,
but I felt a certain tightening about the region of the
heart which I scorned, and which made me very angry
with myself.

I had reached the middle of the pass, which was very
narrow at that point, and was beginning to think that
nothing was likely to happen to me after all, when,
without the slightest warning, four gigantic figures
rushed upon me, two from each side of the pass, and
before I could even dream of seizing my revolvers, " Dare-
Devil " was brought to a sudden standstill by an iron
grip, and both my hands were being dexterously tied
behind my back. This was shame, indeed, for so brave
a little soldier in petticoats as I fondly imagined myself
to be, and at the consciousness of the indignity to which
I was being subjected all my courage revived. Luckily
I spoke half a dozen dialects of that part of the world
well enough to make myself understood.

" What do you mean by making a woman prisoner?"
I cried. Then, as it flashed upon me that my address
was hardly of a conciliatory nature, I added more gently,

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

" Since when have you sunk so low as to go to war with
girls?" The moon shone so brightly that I could see a
smile flicker on the superbly handsome bronzed features
of the huge fellow who was holding " Dare-Devil's "
bridle with no ordinary strength.

" We do not wish to harm you," he replied, very softly,
"provided you mean no tricks."

"Tricks!" exclaimed I, indignantly. "Fine tricks I
am able to play when you have begun by putting me
hors de combat! Shame on you I Don't you see the Red
Cross on my arm? I am" — here I slightly hesitated
— " I am a sort of Sister of Mercy, an army nurse — do
you understand? And many are the men of your race
whom I have nursed devotedly during the last months."

" We know this well, and also who you are, madame.
Do not think us ungrateful for what you have done, and
if you are only willing to swear that you are carrying no
despatches, we will take your word for it, and let you
go free. Otherwise," continued the young man, who
seemed, judging by his gorgeous costume, to be a chief,
"we will make you prisoner in good earnest, and" —
he finished his sentence with a gesture by no means
reassuring.

This was a pretty mess, forsooth ! I collected my
wits as best I could, and, glaring ferociously at him, I
exclaimed, drawing myself up as far as my pinioned
arms would allow me to do: "I refuse to answer your
impudent question. If you think that I am a likely
object to be intrusted with despatches, execute your
threats, make me a prisoner. It will be an easy job and
a glorious victory " — this with a derisive laugh. " Search
me, if so be your pleasure; it will only add a finish to
your exquisite courtesy. But pray put an end to this
distasteful scene, which has lasted long enough. I
may be an estafette, after all, you know!"

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

A queer little creature' I must have looked on my strug-
gling steed, with my short, kilt-like riding-skirt, spurred
boots, white dolman, and dashing military cap, through
which the ominous woodcock's quill seemed to burn a
hole into the very depths of my thick, tightly braided
hair. My captors looked at me for a moment, then
at each other. They were a long time making up their
minds, at least it appeared so to me. Finally, at a sign
from my interlocutor, one of them untied my hands.

"You are right, madame, we do not fight women/'
said he, baring his head, "and especially when they
are brave like you. Go in peace. Had you been afraid
of us, things would have turned out differently, but we
admire a virtue which, above all others, we pride our-
selves in possessing. This pass is not safe, as you have
had reason to find out to your cost, and we shall ac-
company you until you are within hearing of your sen-
tries. But be warned — do not tempt Providence thus
again."

As he said this the handsome chief let go of " Dare-
Devil's" bridle, a circumstance which this well-named
animal immediately availed himself of by bolting with
lightning rapidity. It was no easy task to rein him
in, but I did so, not wishing to look as if I meant to run
away. In silence we proceeded on our road, my stal-
wart body-guards keeping pace with me faithfully, until,
at the end of the pass, which we reached some twenty
minutes later the camp-fires became discernible, glit-
tering like enormous glow-worms on the dark plain. I
stopped my horse, and, beckoning to the chief, I said,
not without some slight emotion :

" You have been very generous. I shall not forget it.
Pray accept this as a small token of my gratitude/' and I
handed him my two revolvers, which were jewels of their
kind. With a bow worthy a throne-room, the young

253

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

man thrust them in his broad, silken belt, which bristled
already with weapons of the most formidable aspect;
then, pressing most deferentially to his lips the hand I
extended to him, he turned on his heel, and, followed
by his imperturbable subordinates, he vanished, as he
had come, in the inky blackness of the night.

In a few minutes I had answered the sentry's chal-
lenge and rode at a spanking gallop into camp. I could
not easily have analyzed my very mingled feelings, but
until the end of the campaign I repaid the chief's chiv-
alrous conduct by tending the wounded mountaineers
who fell into our hands with extra care and devotion.
He had proved to me to be a friend indeed, as well as a
friend in need, and I did not forget it.

CHAPTER XV

"O glorious land, O happy days and sweet;
But hush I he hears his prison-keeper's feet."

IT was bitterly cold, snow had fallen all day long, and
now a violent wind had arisen and was shaking the
icicles from the denuded trees on the streets and boule-
vards and chasing the inky clouds across the yet darker
heavens. As I stood by the library window watching
the storm raging over the beautiful town I loved, I felt
unaccountably sad. Nothing had occurred since my
return from the seat of war to make me more than usu-
ally discontented, and, in the eyes of the world at least,
I had everything to make life enjoyable.

Moreover, on that particular night a kind of presenti-
ment of coming evil seemed to weigh upon me, and I
shivered in that warm, balmy room, brightened by a
huge log fire and perfumed by the scent of many exotics,
just as if the frozen atmosphere of the outer world had
penetrated to my very heart. The noise of the opening
door made me turn my head from the dark window-panes
towards the softly illumined apartment. My groom of
the chambers was standing before me with a letter.

"The bearer of this note entreats to be granted an
audience to-night," the man said, with as much an-
noyance in his tone as he dared to display. "I have
tried to impress upon her how unlikely it is that she
should be received at this hour, but she seems in great
distress, and refuses to go away."

Somewhat surprised, I took the note, which I at first
believed to be a begging letter, but a glance at the few

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

passionate words of entreaty hastily scrawled on the
paper showed me that I had been mistaken, and I gave
orders that the late visitor should be brought to me at
once. As I did so I glanced at the little clock on my
writing-table ; it was half-past eleven already — truly an
unusual hour to receive a stranger whose errand with
me seemed, to say the least, extremely mysterious.
But the appeal was so full of agonized supplication
that I had not the heart to resist it.

Once more the door opened, and a girl wrapped in a
long cloak entered the room. The first glance showed
me that she was not only very lovely, but also unmis-
takably a lady. Her features were drawn, her face
singularly bloodless, and she was trembling from head
to foot as she advanced towards me.

" What is the matter? What can I do for you?" said
I, motioning her to a seat. With a low moan she sank
down at my feet, and in a broken way, which was un-
pleasant to hear, she exclaimed :

" Oh, madame, how can I ever thank you for having
received me — you who alone can save me I"

Forcing her to sit down, I urged her to confide to me
the trouble which had led her to seek my assistance.
It was a very sad story, which she related amid her sobs,
and I felt more moved while listening to her, I think,
than I had ever been before.

"My name is Nadeje Z., or rather, Nadeje B./'
added she, blushing violently. "I am eighteen, and,
although a Russian by birth, I have been brought up
here, where my widowed father, who was exiled twelve
years ago, for political reasons, from the Czar's domin-
ions, has resided ever since. My father is a severe and
embittered man, and, as he considers that his fate has
been an unjust one, he hates Russia and everything Rus-
sian deeply. Two years ago I met at the house of one

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRIN

of my friends a youiiL: Russi;m officer, who is distantly
ivl.ited to them. We loved each other almost immedi-
ately. Of course I did not dare to tell my father any-
thing about our attachment, for I well knew that the
lact of F&lor being a Russian officer would be a more
than sufficient reason for consent to our marriage being
refused. My fianc$, however, did not believe this, and
waited on him to ask for my hand. There is no use in
my describing all I suffered in consequence. Sufficient
be it for me to say that, infuriated by the discovery of
our engagement, I wras commanded to break it off, and
forbidden to hold any further communication with F£-
dor. At first I struggled between my love and filial
obedience, but at last, conquered by F6dor's supplica-
tions, I consented to marry him secretly. Shortly after-
wards he was called to St. Petersburg, and I prevailed
upon him to let me remain at home, for a few months at
least, as I had as yet not the courage to disclose my
secret marriage. Moreover, I hoped to succeed in mol-
lifying my father, and, little by little, to reach a point
where it would be easier to confess the irretrievable step
which I had taken. In this I was mistaken, and I soon
found out that the mere mention of F6dor's name only
served to render my case more hopeless. To make
matters worse, the time soon came when it was impossi-
ble for me to conceal my marriage any longer. Driven
to desperation, I confided in the friends at whose house I
had met my husband. Great wras their perturbation, for,
knowing my parent as they did, they realized how im-
possible it would be to ever obtain his forgiveness. They
dissuaded me from telling him the truth, and agreed to
help me temporarily in my great trouble. Consequent-
ly, they invited me to spend the summer with them at
their villa on the Adriatic coast. There my little boy
was born, and there, with a breaking heart, I was forced
R 257

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

to leave him in the care of an old retainer of my friend's
family, when, in November, I was recalled home.

"During all this time Fe"dor had been unable to ob-
tain leave of absence, and I therefore determined to al-
low matters to rest as they were until he came back to
me. A month ago he wrote that he would be here
shortly, when he would appeal to my father, and, with
or without his consent, would take the child and my-
self back with him to Russia. Yesterday I received
news from him to the effect that, having been unjustly
incriminated in a Nihilistic conspiracy, together with
three other officers of his regiment, he is being sent to
Siberia, after a more than summary judgment. He
swears that he is innocent, and that he has always been
loyal to the Czar, that his only sin is to have incurred
his colonel's disfavor, and that his condemnation is a
mere act of revenge on the latter's part! What was I
to do in this frightful emergency? I thought at first of
starting for St. Petersburg and of appealing to the Czar,
but what chance has my father's daughter of obtaining
an audience from his Majesty? Then suddenly I re-
membered having heard that you have great influence
at the court of St. Petersburg, and, as I knew you to be
good and merciful, I ventured to come and cry out my
misery to you, and to implore you to help me to save my
love from this cruel iniquity."

With these last words the wretched girl cast herself
once more before me, and, grasping my dress in her
hands, pressed it to her lips. I had some difficulty
in soothing her into something like composure, but
when she grew quieter I began, as is my wont when
much perplexed, to pace up and down the room, trying
to collect my thoughts and to make up my mind how
best I could rescue the doomed man. I fully realized
what a wellnigh impossible task I had before me. In

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

spite of my mother's influence at the Russian court,
and of the fact that I was somewhat of a favorite there,
I knew well that the ever-increasing atrocities committed
by the Nihilists, and the great severity displayed by
the Russian authorities towards anybody suspected of
revolutionary tendencies, rendered my prospects of obtain-
ing a free pardon for the young officer at this, the eleventh
hour, exceedingly slight. Nevertheless, I decided that,
come what may, I would do my best to save him.

Turning towards the girl, who was piteously sobbing,
I said : " I shall start for St. Petersburg in the morning,
and I will leave no stone unturned to restore your hus-
band to you. Go back to your father's house, and trust
me implicitly. This is a very serious matter, and no
one must know of it for the present. I do not intend to
communicate with you until I have either succeeded or
failed. Promise me to keep calm and to worry as little
as possible, and under no circumstances tell any one
that you have seen me to-night or that I have promised
to help you."

It is useless to enter here into the scene which fol-
lowed. The poor girl was very grateful. But as I am
not effusive by nature, I do not like to see others fall
into emotional demonstrations. And I was very glad
when I finally managed to send her home hopeful and
comforted.

By this time it was almost morning. The first
glimmer of dawn began to light up the deep layer of
snow on the balconies outside, and shimmered through
the feathery flakes that still fell noiselessly. But I did
not feel tired, and walked up and down from the monu-
mental fireplace to the doors of the winter-garden ad-
joining the library for more than an hour, thinking over
my plan of campaign, and arranging in my mind the
details of the coming journey.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

At seven o'clock I went to my room and summoned
Johanna, who was greatly shocked when she found I
had not gone to bed at all. Her astonishment was not
lessened by the instructions I gave her to be ready to
start with me for St. Petersburg in three hours. When
I ended by asking whether my husband was at home
or not, her astonishment was complete. After having
made due inquiries from the valet on duty in his master's
antechamber, she informed me that the latter had just
returned from his club, and was now drinking a cup of
tea in his dressing-room. As was my custom now,
when I had something of importance to communicate to
him — a rare incident, it is true — I wrote a line to ac-
quaint him of my departure by the morning express
for Russia, stating that private family matters required
my immediate presence in St. Petersburg. I received
in return a courteous note, in which he expressed many
amiable regrets that a previous engagement prevented
him from seeing me off. Having thus discharged what
I considered to be a mere matter of form, I began to pre-
pare for my long trip.

At ten o'clock I drove to the station, where I found my
maid, my courier, and a confidential " valet de chambre "
awaiting me near my private car. As I entered it, I
was somewhat astonished to find, on the small table
before the divan, a superb basket of Russian violets
fringed with lilies-of-the-valley. No one save my hus-
band knew of my departure, and this fragrant message
certainly could not have come from him.

"Who brought those flowers, YSgor?" I asked my
courier, who was arranging everything for my comfort
in the little salon adjacent to my sleeping-room.

"They were handed to me a few minutes ago by a
closely veiled lady/' he replied, bowing low. Then he
added, " There is a letter among the flowers/'

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

In an envelope I found a card on which the word
" Merci " was written, evidently by the same hand which
had penned the note I had received the night before.
Touched by this attention, I leaned out of the window,
watching the snow-covered streets as we steamed slowly
out of the station, and speculated on the possible results
of my unexpected visit to the land of the Czars.

Gradually the motion of the train became more and
more rapid. Soon we were going at full speed through
the pine woods which lie like an ever-green belt around
the city. Very dark and sad did the sombre firs appear
against the background of snow in which everything
was enveloped, and very narrow the horizon looked,
veiled by the thickly falling flakes. So dreary was the
outlook that I soon retreated from the window, still
dwelling on the thought of the strange errand which I
had undertaken. In spite of the horrible weather, I did
not stop at Warsaw, but went straight on to St. Peters-
burg, where I arrived at length, rather worn out, but
in a comparatively hopeful state of mind.

I drove from the station to the H6tel de TEurope, where
a suite of apartments looking out on the Newski Prospekt
had been ordered by telegraph for me by Y6gor. I was
heartily glad to have reached my destination, and I
fully enjoyed the rest I stood in so great a need of after
my hurried rush across the frozen plain of three coun-
tries.

Never had St. Petersburg seemed so beautiful to me
as when I looked out upon it next morning. Snow lay
on the domes and steeples, and swathed everything
in its fleecy folds. The whole landscape was white and
frozen, as if carved out of the purest alabaster. The
fiery orb of the Northern sun burned in the clear blue
sky, and the air was as intoxicating as a draught of
champagne. The great city lying above the frozen

261

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

waters of the Neva looked dream-like, embedded in its
pure setting of snow, which dazzled the eye as if the
whole land was covered with diamond-dust.

Before breakfast I sent a short note to Prince Alexan-
der D., telling him of my arrival, and requesting him to
obtain for me an audience from the Emperor during the
course of the day. "Sandy/' as Prince D. is called
by his acquaintances, was an old friend of mine, and he
nobly rose to the occasion by promising me the desired
interview. I therefore set off for Gatchina shortly after
twelve o'clock, and, on arriving there, found an imperial
sleigh waiting at the station to convey me to the palace.
The little town of Gatchina, nestling coquettishly on
two shores of the white lake — a name which seemed
singularly befitting this winter season — looked to me
like an oasis in the still and solemn landscape I had
just traversed.

The fine-looking gendarmes, in blue uniforms and
tall patent-leather boots, awoke many memories of pre-
vious visits in my mind, and not even their forbidding
countenances could abate the flow of good-temper and
high spirits which had taken possession of me since the
moment I had set foot once more on Russian soil. There
was even something exhilarating in the thought that
these conscientious and well-drilled officials would be
truly deeply horrified could they guess that I was here to
attempt the rescue of a Nihilist convict from the clutches
of the Czar's police. While the sleigh skimmed along
on the road to the palace, behind three splendid black
horses from the Ukraine, I could not help laughing out-
right as this thought once more crossed my mind.

On we flew, passing the villa of Prince G., whose
greatest title to everlasting fame is his having been per-
mitted one day to take a plunge in the bath-tub which
his Majesty had just vacated, to secure which inestima-

262

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

blc favor he presented the Czar's valet with two thousand
rubles. If this is not loyalty, what ought it to be called,
although, myself, I have always thought it rather a
revolting kind of loyalty, and I highly approve of the
Emperor's remark to Prince G., when his Majesty
heard of this piece touching of hero-worship.

" You are a good fellow," said the monarch, laughing
heartily, "but what a fool 1"

I was still thinking of this ridiculous episode, when
we glided through the gates of the magnificent park
which surrounds the castle. Every tree, every branch
were encased in a sheet of glittering ice, like some en-
chanted legendary forest, and the groups of Siberian
arolla and giant pines standing on both sides of the
building sparkled like huge emeralds in a setting of
silver.

As the sleigh drew up before the steps of the palace,
two chevalier-guards, with their white uniforms and
eagle-crested helmets shining gloriously in the sun,
advanced to meet me, followed by the Emperor's aide-
de-camp, Count 0. A few minutes later I was in the
august presence of the Great White Czar himself.

After the usual preliminary compliments on both sides,
I launched into a vivid recital of the dramatic story
which had brought me all this distance. We were alone
in the great library, which was his Majesty's favorite
apartment, and I spoke in all confidence and ease to the
sovereign who had known me since childhood.

All the eloquence I could summon was exercised by
me in pleading the cause of Fe*dor and of his poor young
wife, but I observed that, as I went on, the Emperor's
face gradually grew grave and stern. When at last
I stopped, out of sheer exhaustion, Alexander said,
coldly :

"You ask an almost impossible thing, Muzzi. I re-

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

member the affair perfectly well. Twelve years ago
that girl's father was implicated in a very serious Nihil-
istic conspiracy, and the young man for whom you
plead so warmly has, I am certain, not been condemned
unjustly. Any one but you, my dear child/' continued
the Emperor, in a softened tone, "coming to me on such
an errand would meet, I am afraid, with a curt and
definite refusal."

Quite undaunted by this discouraging beginning, I
jumped up from the big chair on which I had been sit-
ting, exclaiming :

"Sire, you cannot refuse to investigate this matter
personally, at my earnest request. The man swears
that he is innocent, and I may add that certainly he
would not be the first who has suffered an unjust condem-
nation at the hands of the police authorities here or
elsewhere."

"These are big words, and not very seemly in the
mouth of a lady who is half a Russian herself. I do
not think that I can do anything for your prote"g6."

"But you must do something, Sire/' cried I, now
quite beside myself.

"Must ?" said the autocrat, drawing himself up and
gazing at me with rising anger.

For a moment we looked at each other unflinchingly.
I was angry, and scarcely cared whether the Emperor
noticed it or not, but suddenly I was struck by the lu-
dicrousness of my thus laying down the law to the
omnipotent ruler of "All the Russias," before whom
millions of human creatures trembled, and I burst out
laughing. This was too much for my imperial host,
and he could not repress a smile.

" I am but a poor diplomat/' said I, when I had recov-
ered sufficient composure to speak, "and not at all ac-
customed to asking favors/' Then, stepping towards

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Till-: TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

the C/ar and putting my hand on his arm, I looked up
in his kindly face, and added, pleadingly: "I am very
anxious to save that man, and I have always been
treated so kindly by your Majesty that I have no fear
of my entreaties being absolutely repulsed."

Again the Emperor smiled, and taking my hand in
his own, he raised it to his lips. " That's better/' said
he, affectionately. "Alas! I am only too soft-hearted
myself, and always anxious, I hope, to do what is right.
I shall inquire into the matter at once; you have gained
your point so far, and if the man's innocence can be
proved I promise you that justice will be done to him."

I breathed a sigh of relief.

"However," continued the Emperor, "I will do this,
solely and uniquely, because it is you who ask it. I
have no pity for those who are tainted, be it ever so
slightly, with Nihilistic tendencies. Russia is becom-
ing more and more honeycombed every day with Nihil-
ism; revolutionary principles are spreading in the
army and in the navy, and must be stopped. Remem-
ber, I am not talking now as Czar, but as a simple Rus-
sian citizen. Nihilism may originally have sprung
from a desire to put an end to autocracy in Russia, but
to-day it has become a mere levelling theory, such as
that which inspired the atrocities of the Paris Com-
mune."

"Nihilists ought to be weary of their unceasing and
vain efforts," said I, "for their plots and plans have
met until now with but indifferent success."

"Indifferent, eh?" he replied, with a bitter smile.
"In more than one case they might be satisfied with
the harm they have done. The liberal principles
about which there is so much talk now are only a purely
euphonic appellation for anarchy, communism, or some
such other empty Utopian ideal. Read the Samow-

265

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

praveline Organ Sotsialistoff Revolutsioneroff [Self-
Government Organ of the Social Revolutionists], and
you will see whether what I am saying is true/'

"It is so sad/' I could not help saying, "that severity
to the culprits should entail so much suffering to in-
nocent beings. I abhor Nihilists, and yet what other
Utopia has ever begotten such unwavering and heroic
sacrifice, such uncomplaining surrender of youth, wealth,
power, enjoyment of life, to a lost cause, to a mere empty
idea ? What might be accomplished if all this enormous
force, this senseless heroism, were directed in the right
channel, instead of being wasted in rolling the rock of
revolution up a steep hill, whence it must ever roll back,
crushing those who futilely attempt to plant it on the
summit of our modern civilization?"

"Believe me/' murmured Alexander, wearily, "noth-
ing will avail but to persistently crush every head of the
hydra, every tentacle of the all-devouring octopus which
is destroying the country. Leniency will not answer;
in severity lies the only salvation/'

The Czar had risen from the seat which he had oc-
cupied before his writing-desk during the latter part of
our conversation, and was now striding up and down
the long room, with knitted brows and compressed lips.
I felt that once more my prote*g£'s cause was hanging
in the balance, and, anxious to create a diversion in
order to change the course of the Emperor's thoughts, I
bent forward to caress a gigantic bloodhound lying at
full length on the ermine rug before the writing-table.
With the mobility of mood which characterized him, the
Czar wheeled round, and, gazing almost tenderly at this
formidable- looking pet, murmured :

" Ah, yes ! I agree with the clever statesman who said
that what he preferred in mankind was the dog; there
at least we find loyalty and fidelity without the planning

266

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I

and plotting you were talking about just now. But
enough of this. I will keep my word to you, and in a
few days I may be able to put before you all the cir-
cumstances of what you call an arbitrary condemna-
tion. In the meanwhile, I hope that you will consent to
be my guest and the Empress's at Gatchina. We can-
not allow you to remain at the H6tel de 1'Europe, and
you will surely not refuse us the all-too-rare pleasure
of your presence/'

To this, of course, I could answer only with profuse
thanks. I felt intensely grateful to the Emperor for his
kindness. I told him so, and was glad to see the heavy
cloud which had hung about his brow pass off and to
notice that he was smiling cheerfully again when I
left him to occupy the suite of apartments which had
been mine during previous sojourns in Gatchina.

The next few days consisted of a series of pleasures,
among which was a great ball at the Winter Palace.
I have always loved the Winter Palace fetes. They
seem to be more imposing in their magnificence than
those given at any other European court. The entire
suite of state apartments had been thrown open for the
occasion, and were decorated with banks and mounds
of violets, which filled even these enormous rooms with
exquisite fragrance. As I danced in the Quadrille
d'Honneur with the Czar, he whispered to me :

"Do not get impatient, Muzzi; I have set General
G." (the chief of police) "at work for you, and we
shall soon be able to tell you whether your prote*g£ de-
served his fate or not, or if there is any loop-hole of
escape for him."

The ever-changing figures of the quadrille prevented
me from answering in words, but I gave the Czar a look
and a smile of gratitude. Later in the evening I met
General G. face to face. I was walking through St.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

George's Hall, towards the Winter Garden, with Grand-
Duke V., and I smiled as bewitchingly as possible on
the great man, who flattened himself against the wall
with true military precision and deference as we
approached.

"Ah, general/' laughed the Grand -Duke; "active
as usual ? I see you grow younger with every passing
year. I wish it were the same with me."

"Your Imperial Highness has no cause for com-
plaint/' replied the delighted official. " But as for me/'
he continued, with an ominous shake of the head, " I
have cause to be watchful and active. Heaven knows I
have." Resolved on winning his heart, I said, sweetly :

" Like Atlas's, your burden is heavy, general ; but,
like this strong and worthy personage, you carry it
securely and nobly."

Was it reproach which I saw glimmering in the gen-
eral's eyes? It may be that only my conscience pricked
me for having made the said burden rather heavier than
usual by my inroads on his domain, yet, as we passed on,
I thought that I heard him sigh wearily, as if he wrere a
very tired Atlas, indeed, on that particular night. Poor
General G., worthy man as he undoubtedly was, I
could have shaken him for not expediting matters
more swiftly. I thought unceasingly of the broken-
hearted girl who was so anxiously awaiting tidings of
her young husband, and also of the miserable convict
who, foot-sore and desparing, was even now being
hustled towards the semi-arctic and desolate wilds of
Siberia, while here all was light and joy, comfort and
lavish luxury. I almost felt angry with myself for the
careless, happy life I was leading, when I compared it
with their agony, and yet more so for my unjust vexa-
tion at the delay which was so unavoidable in the in-
vestigation of so intricate a case.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Another week went by, and still I obtained no cer-
tainty as to Fexlor's chances. I could do nothing to
hasten the proceedings, for I feared by a word to spoil
my case or to worry the Czar, who was in one of his
periodical blue moods.

At last, one morning, as I was just leaving my apart-
ments, Aide-de-Camp Baron E. brought me a mes-
sage, requesting my presence in the sovereign's study.
Preceded by the young officer, I made my way through
the long suite of rooms leading to Alexander's private
chancellerie. Here I found the Emperor seated before a
table covered with papers. He was in earnest conver-
sation with the chief of police, whose careworn features
wore an expression of deep concern.

As I entered, both men rose to their feet, and the
C/.ar, taking me affectionately by the hand, led me to
an ottoman beside his desk :

" My dear child/' said he, in a voice which I noticed
was slightly shaking, "we have carefully sifted the
affair which has brought you here, and I have come to
the conclusion that the man has been treated unfairly,
unjustly." Here he glanced at the chief of police, who
literally shrank before his gaze. "It would take too
long to enter into the details of this disgraceful busi-
ness," continued the sovereign, impatiently; "suffice it
to state that there has been foul play, that, even had the
man been guilty, the condemnation ought not to have
been so hurriedly pronounced, and that, as he was able
to give, and gave absolute proof of his innocence, the
sentence passed upon him was an iniquity for which
the responsible persons therein implicated will suffer."

So exasperated did the Emperor appear to be, that
I did not venture to speak a word in reply. The un-
fortunate chief of police, who was visibly shaking in his
boots, and who was very pale under his tanned skin,

269

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

was unable to contain himself any longer, and ex-
claimed, hoarsely :

" Your Majesty does not, I hope, hold me responsible
for a crime committed by a person or persons entirely
removed from my jurisdiction. I have — "

" There ought to be nothing beyond your jurisdiction
within the boundaries of the empire, general/' inter-
rupted the Emperor. "However, I do not hold you
responsible for the disgraceful state of things which
renders it possible for a colonel to take so brutal and mer-
ciless a revenge on an innocent man, because the latter
happens to be under his orders and to have aroused his
jealousy. The chief occupation and desire of my en-
tourage is, I see, to throw dust in my eyes, so as to blind
me to the arbitrary doings of wretches like Colonel
X. But this has been a good lesson, and I shall be
ever grateful to you/' he added, turning to me, "for
having been the means of throwing light on the
abuses perpetrated in my name. All this must and
will change."

The silence which followed was broken only by the
monotonous ticking of the great malachite clock on the
high mantel-piece. The general stood motionless, bit-
ing his heavy mustache, and I mechanically pulled to
pieces the knot of crimson roses fastened among the laces
of my breakfast-gown. Alexander had sunk into the
great arm-chair before his writing-table, and his light-
blue eyes were fixed in deep reverie on the full-length
picture of his murdered father hanging above it. Con-
scious that the position, to say the least, was becoming
remarkably awkward, I plucked up spirit, and, softly
gliding to Alexander's side, I half knelt beside him,
saying, with much emotion :

"I am grateful to you, Sire — I can never say how
grateful — for all the trouble you have taken on my

270

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

behalf. But I am also deeply pained to have added to
your Majesty's many cares."

I am not ashamed to say that the expression of suffer-
ing which lingered in the Czar's eyes brought tears to
my own. It seemed so sad that this just and good man,
whose power was practically unlimited, should find out
how powerless he really was to prevent injustice and
to carry out his noble designs. With a somewhat
mournful but very kind smile, which softened his en-
tire countenance, he pushed back the tangle of curls
from my forehead, and, gazing into my eyes he mur-
mured:

"Do not be sorry, my child; you have done a very
noble deed, and it is I who am grateful to you for the
pluck you have shown. General G. will see that the
necessary papers are prepared at once, and that the
man whom you have saved from so iniquitous a fate re-
ceives a free pardon. Later I will look to it personally
that he is indemnified and rehabilitated, if such a thing
be possible, for all that he has so unjustly suffered/'

The general, at a sign of dismissal from his imperial
master, backed towards the door, and, with a military
salute of punctilious correctness, disappeared beyond
the porti&res of the adjoining hall.

Left alone with the Czar, I once more attempted to
express my heartfelt thanks to him, but he silenced me
at once, and we fell to discussing the means of bring-
ing Fe"dor back to St. Petersburg without unnecessary
delay. Over two hours' conversation brought me to
the conclusion that this would not be such an easy
matter as I at first had believed it to be.

I knew without being told so that all Russian officials
thoroughly loyal to the crown have so great and nat-
ural a horror for Nihilists that whoever would be in-
trusted with the task of pursuing the convoy of prisoners,

271

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

among which was Nadeje's husband, would display but
little enthusiasm and ardor in this fatiguing, not to say
dangerous, undertaking.

To cross part of Siberia in mid- winter is never a pleas-
ant or an easy thing, and to do so in order to rescue
one of the abhorred Nihilists would be particularly
painful and distasteful. It was unlikely that much
credence would be placed in the man's innocence, and
was it not more probable that his pardon would be re-
garded as an act of favoritism, due to a powerful inter-
cession with the Czar. The convoy of prisoners had by
this time certainly reached the plains, which precede
the chain of the Ural Mountains, its destination being
some mining district far beyond Ekaterinburg, and it
would take both time and numberless hardships to
overtake it in this season. I begged his Majesty to al-
low my courier, Ye"gor Nikolaitch, an intelligent man,
in the service of my family for many years, to be in-
trusted with this confidential mission, and this request
was immediately granted.

Before I left the Czar, however, I had thoroughly de-
cided to go myself. Of course I did not mention this
hare-brained scheme to the Emperor, who would never
have allowed it. But during the entire day I turned over
in my head the means of leaving St. Petersburg for
Siberia without my plans being discovered.

The spirit of adventure was strong in me in those
days. Moreover, I had an intuition that, left to the
mercy of officialdom, Fedor would not be rescued for a
long time to come, if he were ever rescued at all.

Red-tapeism is more prevalent in Russia than any-
where else, and if the free pardon I had obtained for the
young officer was sent officially and transmitted by offi-
cials, it would be a crawling business at best, whereas
I, once in possession of the papers granting him his

272

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

liberty and of a safe-conduct signed by the Emperor,
could — money being no object to me — reach him in a
comparatively short time. That night I summoned
\ Y>LCor, and made a clean breast of my project to the
faithful fellow.

1 le was at first absolutely horrified, and entreated
me to abandon the idea of attempting so difficult and
fatiguing a journey at such a time of the year ; but, hav-
ing known me from a child, he soon saw that nothing
would shake my determination, and, good fellow that he
was, he immediately began to discuss with me the best
manner of putting my plans into immediate execution.

"Listen to me, Ye*gor/' said I, "this is what I am
going to do : I shall announce to-morrow to their Majes-
ties that I intend to leave St. Petersburg on the next day
but one. And I shall do so — I'll have to, you see, for I
shall certainly be taken in great pomp to the station —
worse luck! At luga you and I will leave the train,
letting the maid and valet pursue their way home alone,
while we shall return here and from thence proceed
to Moscow, Kazan, Perin, and then to Ekaterinburg
without a moment's delay. I am going to leave letters
for the Emperor and Empress to be delivered to them
two days after my departure, explaining my reasons
for going to Siberia. By that time I shall be so far out
of reach that matters will have to be allowred to take
their course/' ,

Here Ye"gor interrupted me respectfully but firmly:
" The Emperor will never forgive this/' said he, mourn-
fully.

"Yes, he will. Of course he will be angry at first,
but ultimately he will understand my motives, and he
is too noble -hearted not to sympathize with my rea-
sons for doing this. Besides, there is nothing so very
formidable in what I am going to do. The greater part
s 273

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

of the trip will be made by train, and it is only when
we have ascertained the exact route taken by the con-
voy that we shall be forced to take to a kibitka [half-cov-
ered sledge] in order to overtake it."

" May I venture to point out the difficulties and dan-
gers of a journey in a kibitka on the frozen plains of
Siberia?" suggested Ye"gor, much distressed.

"You may, if it please you," I said, laughingly, "but
I do not wish to hear any croaking ; I am perfectly healthy
and strong, well used to out-door exposure, afraid of
nothing, and, what's more, I am absolutely resolved, and
nothing you can say will alter my decision. So enough
of all this. To-morrow you can buy for me and for
yourself all the fur-lined garments, cordials, medicines,
rugs, arms, and even surgical instruments your fore-
thought may suggest. See to it that all we need is
packed up and left at the Hotel de France, in the Bol-
shayd. Morskaya" Street, under your own name, for it is
there that we shall come on our return to St. Peters-
burg, and from thence that we shall start for the North.
And now, good-night, Yegor; pleasant dreams to you,"
I concluded, with another burst of unconquerable mer-
riment, for the poor fellow's woe-begone countenance
was irresistibly funny to me.

When he had gone, I sat down by the fire and fell into
one of my customary deep reveries, which was, however,
rather disagreeably interrupted by my suddenly no-
ticing that the long train of my white velvet court-dress,
which had, unheeded by me, lain in too close a contact
with the smouldering embers, was slowly beginning to
burn. Crushing it beneath my foot, I said to myself,
gayly, that this was a good omen, for had I worn on that
particular occasion a frock of lighter texture there would
surely have been a sudden and most unwelcome end to
all my philanthropic dreams and to myself as well.

274

CHAPTER XVI

* We freeze, we starve, we feel
The anguish in our breast,
Hard is our lot, but yet

With freedom we are blest 1"

SUCCESS crowned my departure from St. Petersburg,
as I knew that it would, and I started on my Siberian
trip with a light heart and a hopeful mind. The papers
which I carried not only included all the documents
concerning the delivery of my convict — as I began to
call him — into the hands of one Y6gor Nikolaitch Ful6w,
but also a safe-conduct for the said Ye"gor and party,
charging all authorities to protect and aid them on
their journey.

Of the railway portion of our voyage little need be
said. It was what all such journeys are, rendered more
trying at that season by the extreme severity of the
weather and by the hurry with which we had to proceed.
I must, however, admit that this precipitation had its
advantages, as it spared us any lengthy stay in the
filthy inns which are the only substitutes to be
found on the Siberian road for hotels. Most towns on
the way from Moscow to Perin have a desolate appear-
ance, the streets are narrow and absolutely innocent of
any kind of pavement, the wooden houses look dingy,
dreary, dismantled, with a general air of neglect and
hopelessness about them very depressing to witness,
while the flatness of the landscape, broken here and
there by clumps of dwarf willows, showing like inky
marks against the blinding whiteness of the snow-

275

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

covered steppe, is most bewildering to the unaccustomed
eye.

Y6gor worked wonders for me, and managed to
spare me many petty annoyances and also many of
the privations unavoidable under such unpropitious
circumstances. But all his care could not make those
railways anything but atrocious, uncomfortable, and
strange jolts, and the mysterious noises with which
their onward progress was accompanied is not easily
forgotten when once experienced. By a judicious men-
tion of my " lofty rank/' of my intimacy with the im-
perial family, and by a well-advised exhibition of pass-
ports, my diplomatic courier secured for me the most
distinguished consideration and respect from the au-
thorities wherever we went — a fact which greatly con-
tributed to make my lot a comparatively pleasant one.
Moreover, employes and chiefs alike soon found out,
too, that gold glided easily through my fingers, and
that it was to their interest to be obliging. So that I
had no reason to complain of any want of empressement.
The three Cossacks who had been appointed as Yegor's
escort were useful, and in spite of their forbidding aspect
showed so much good temper that during the first part
of our journey they were invaluable to me. I christened
them Og, Gog, and Magog, for they were the tallest
Cossacks I have ever seen, and their bearded and grim
countenances reminded me vividly of Cruikshank's por-
traits of the three heroes of the Tower of London.

As we neared the Ural the temperature became al-
most unbearable, the cold was piercing, and the softly
descending, feathery snow-flakes froze as they fell. A
tourmente during the crossing of the mountains was all
we needed to make things unendurably lively, and we
got it with a vengeance! The roaring wind blew the
snow in whistling clouds, and the heavens seemed to open

276

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

to give passage to so dense a downpour that we felt as
if we were being buried alive under icy winding-sheets.
When we reached Ekaterinburg, it seemed to me as
I had been travelling for years, and I was glad to
top there in order to make inquiries about the convoy
convicts we were pursuing.

We put up at the H6tel Plotinkof. Now, guide-
ks go quite out of their way to prove to the guileless
aveller that this is a very good hostelry, provided with
ery modern improvement, and it may be owing to my
aggerated fastidiousness that I was so disappointed
ith it. I must add, however, that the most conscien-
tious among these guide-books mention that insect-
powder is a necessary armament for the guests of the
Plotinkof! So I should think; for the fleet-footed
inmates of the bedrooms there, whose generic names I
should blush to record, are the most bloodthirsty para-
sites which it has ever been my unhappy luck to en-
counter. Woe be to the thin-skinned traveller in these
regions, for his peace of mind and body stands but an
unfair chance against the manslaughtering exploits of
a sportive army which overwhelms him with its indelicate
attentions, and pesters him with a zeal and energy quite
beyond all praise or description.

On the night of my arrival I hit upon a Machiavellian
plan in order to obtain a little rest. Piling my fur rugs
on the floor in front of the ponderous stove which heated
the room, I placed four lighted candles at the four cor-
ners of this improvised couch. It appears that — well,
thai those many-legged gentry I was just talking about
are afraid of a bright light and dislike strong perfumes.
This being given, with the help of a pint or so of ex-
tract of verbena, I succeeded in sleeping undisturbed
fnr several hours. The burning candles gave my in-
stallation a dismal resemblance to a catafalque, a re-

. 277

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

semblance which was not diminivshed by the sombre
blue-black furs on which I reclined, and which might
have alarmed and painfully impressed a person of ner-
vous temperament. I, however, preserved my equa-
nimity and slept very soundly.

When, the next morning, the waiter came in with the
breakfast-tray, and saw that I had not slept in the crim-
son-curtained bed, so elaborately prepared for me, his
ill-cgncealed indignation was more than human gravity
could bear. He informed me that this was the "Im-
perial suite/' and even volunteered a long explanation
from which I gathered that the sheets were changed
almost after every traveller! Awed by so luxurious
a precaution, I looked helplessly at the man, who strode
majestically out of the room, sustained by the integrity
of his conscience.

This one instance of Siberian hotel life will suffice to
give a general idea of what those Northern inns were at
the time when I honored them with my patronage. The
Plotinkof was one of the best, and there were many
worse. They are, as a rule, one-storied log-buildings,
presenting nothing that is particularly interesting or
nice to the eye, and very uncomfortable withal. The
food is coarse and bad in all cases, and tea is about the
only decent thing one may obtain in those distant lati-
tudes.

The time had now come for us to resort to kibitkas
in order to proceed on our journey, if we wished to catch
up with the marching party of two hundred and fifty con-
victs, among which I hoped to find my protege". I fore-
saw that we would have to rough it, even more than I had
expected, for the weather had become decidedly worse
than ever. The sky was dark, almost purple, and when
the sun condescended to put in an appearance it afford-
ed us absolutely no heat, and its cold rays paled before

278

THK TRIBULATIONS ai- .\ MMNTKSS

the dazzling whiteness of the snow which covered th»-
limitless pla

1 shall never forget the morning when we hade good-
bye to all apparent u .-!IL'< -s of < \\ ili/ation. Y6gor and I
climbed into our kihitka, and set out with a troika of
strong and enduring jxjst-horses towards an unknown

'ination. It was not without (lender! misgivings
that I < ontemplatrd what lay before us, and yet, having
now gone so far, I was anxious to proceed as soon as
possible. Ye"gor, who until then had forborne from
admonishing me on what, to judge by his looks, he
lamented inwardly as my unpardonable recklessness,

ok his head ominously as the horses, rattling the
numerous bells on their arched collars, started on their
way, and even Og, Gog, and Magog contemplated me
with a severe and quite withering expression of blame.
I might as well acknowledge that, as I began to taste
the bitterness of the icy air of the steppe, I could not
wonder at this, and I drew my thick furs about me with
an unwonted feeling of anxiety. The temperature was

lething awful — forty-eight degrees below zero — the
horses were almost hidden from our view by the thick
steam which rose from their bodies, and a cloud of frozen
moisture filled the atmosphere. All my usual buoyancy
could not prevent me from suffering from the cold, but I
far too stubborn to acknowledge it ; and when we
IK d at the post-stations to change horses, 1 assumed
a cheerful mien, with the fallacious hopes of misleading
the watchful eye of poor Ye*gor. Even the burning- hot
tea swallowed on these occasions did not warm us up,
and as hour followed hour our tortures steadily in-
creased.

One of the most unbearable sensations we went
through was the terrible shaking and jolting of the
kibitka. Our road was cut up with deep furrows, little

279

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

hills and little valleys of hardened snow, and the sledge,
as it crossed over them, bobbed up and down like a ship
in a gale of wind, with the distressing result of some-
thing very much akin to sea-sickness. A horrible sen-
sation of f aintness often came over me ; the air would
become pregnant with millions of blue stars, the cold
grasped me in the region of the heart, and once or twice
I completely lost consciousness. The process of re-
suscitation through which I was put was always ex-
tremely painful, and although I was grateful enough to
be aroused from a condition which in this intense frost
is often fatal, still it was with great difficulty that I re-
strained myself from scolding my rescuers for their ap-
parent heartlessness and roughness.

After leaving Ekaterinburg, our Cossack escort evi-
dently imbibed a considerable quantity of alcohol in
order to combat the effects of the arctic temperature
we were undergoing, and I regret to say that they were
by no means what can truthfully be described as pleas-
ant when in their cups. Fortunately they seemed to
look upon me as if I had been endowed with some su-
pernatural power, and I was usually able to conquer
their frequent fits of ill-temper. Y£gor, who, like all
Russians, could handle with amazing rapidity the vitu-
perations in which his native tongue is so singularly
rich, swore at them elaborately upon the least provoca-
tion, but his words never had any practical result, and
in the end I was always forced to interfere in order to re-
store something like peace in the breasts of my body-
guards. Perceiving that at any moment words might
lead to something far more deadly, I endeavored to con-
trol my rough escort as best I could, but I knew how
slight was my hold on these semi-savages, and this
thought gave me many a qualm for our subsequent
safety. Things, indeed, looked very black for us in

280

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

more ways than one. We had as yet been unable to
overtake the convoy, and the very elements seemed to
conspire against the success of our foolhardy expe-
dition.

This portion of our journey remains engraved on my
mind like a frightful nightmare. How long it lasted
I could not tell ; looking back upon it now, I should say
it must have been months, and dreary, desolate months
it that. Hour after hour there was no break in the
wide, white track we were following, save at some wretch-
ed post-house where the tired horses were changed. The
snow fell ceaselessly, the icy wind howled about us, dur-
ing the short days and the long steely-hued nights.
Often we could plainly hear the baying of the wolves
in the thickets of misshapen pine-trees which we passed
on the road. Verst upon verst of that fearful plain was
covered, and in spite of all my efforts to keep the three
giants and the driver in good humor by showering
presents upon them, my escort grumbled aloud now.
They claimed, with some reason, I own, that without
having committed any crime to deserve such punish-
ment, they were subjected to the same fatigues and pri-
vations as are Siberian convicts, and I saw that the
moment was approaching when they would refuse to go
farther. How this was to be prevented I could not pos-
sibly imagine.

One night, about eleven o'clock, the climax came.
We had been travelling fast and furiously in the teeth
of a violent storm of snow and wind, for I had hopes of
obtaining certain information about the chain of con-
victs at the next post-station. The sledge was driven
along through drifts and hurricanes on a road where
all tracks were obliterated and amid a darkness ren-
dered livid by the refraction of the snow. It was a
night when death hovered everywhere, and we realized

281

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

only too vividly the many dangers with which we
were so fiercely struggling. At length the glimmer
of distant lights became dully discernible, and soon
the panting horses were pulled up half dead before a
cluster of miserable I$bas.

The postmaster, wrapped in sheepskins up to his very
eyes, came out with a lantern and helped us to alight.
The house was poor and looked more repulsive than any
place I had yet seen. But there was a large stove in
the corner, and I was glad, indeed, to stretch my tired
limbs on the big bear-skin brought from the sledge,
in front of the glowing fire, and to sip a cup of scalding
tea. We were to rest here for three or four hours, and to
start again at dawn. I lay watching languidly the three
Cossacks, the driver, and the postmaster, as they sat
down at a clumsy table with their favorite meal of brown
bread, raw onions, kwass, and spirits before them. The
postmaster was also a Cossack, of Herculean propor-
tions, with a heavy head, enormous mustaches, and a
peculiarly sinister cast of countenance. He was talking
in a low, growling voice to Og, Gog, and Magog, and
his frequent glances towards me clearly indicated that
I was the subject under discussion. When he had seen
to my comfort, Ye"gor approached this repulsive-looking
group, and I heard him ask the postmaster to tell him
at what time the horses would be ready to start. The
latter thrust his gigantic fists deep into the pocket of
his touloupe, raised his bullet-shaped head, and, gazing
defiantly at Y6gor, answered, laconically :

"I have no horses to give you/'

"What do you mean by that?" exclaimed my courier,
angrily. "Show me the book on which the departure
of your last horses is inscribed, so that I may see
whether you lie or not/'

" I have no book to show you/' was the stolid reply.

282

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

"This is nonsense/' cried Ye"gor, now thoroughly
roused. "If this be as you say, you have committed
a punishable offence, for the law demands that you
should keep a post-book. You must find us horses
before dawn; my mistress is travelling with a safe-
conduct signed by the 'Little Father' (the Czar) him-
self, and any impertinence on your part will be cruelly
visited upon you."

The big man shrugged his shoulders contemptuously,
and, pointing to my escort, said, quite unmoved : " Your
companions here claim that they are being badly treated,
and are weary of this endless journey through storm
and snow, and as they belong to my people, I mean
to see them righted."

The scene which ensued is impossible to describe.
The wordy warfare grew loud and discordant, and
threatened to end in a hand-to-hand fight. Half dazed
by cold and fatigue, I did not succeed in rousing my-
self sufficiently to interfere, and continued to watch the
proceedings as if they were only part of a dream, in-
stead of a very stern reality.

Suddenly a small side door opened, and a woman
came in, with an uncertain, wavering step. Her face
was strangely white, and her red-rimmed eyes had a
vacant stare in them which made her look like a maniac
or an inveterate drunkard. She was trembling from
head to foot, and her general appearance was one of
low debauchery. She addressed her husband in a

hoarse voice — " Une voix de rogomme " — requesting him
to be still, as the noise was hurting " the boy." Through
the door she had left open I could plainly hear, in the
silence which followed her entrance, a succession of
pitiful moans proceeding from the next room. So la-
mentable was this sound that it awakened me at once
from my half-slumbering condition, and, impelled by

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

some power that conquered my weariness, I rose and
unceremoniously walked into the dimly lighted cham-
ber. The spectacle which met my eyes was degraded
and nauseating beyond words, and in spite of my agita-
tion I noted every detail thereof with lightning rapidity.
The place was repulsively dirty, the floor of beaten earth
was covered with rotting straw, and the only furniture
consisted of a long, wooden bench, a rickety deal table,
on which a tallow candle guttered in an iron candle-
stick, and a shelf attached to the wrall supporting an
Icone (religious image enamelled on metal), in front
of which a little hanging oil-lamp was lighted. In the
corner to the right of the door was a large, low stove,
on the top of which was what the Russians call a palati,
and which serves as a bed for the family during the
winter months.

On this strange couch lay a boy of fourteen or fifteen
years old, whose features bore an expression of such
terrible suffering that for a moment I recoiled in dismay.
The mother had followed me into the room, and, turning
towards her, I asked what was the matter with the lad.
From her loud and disconnected lamentations I at last
gathered with some difficulty that "Yvan," who had
always been delicate, had three days previously run a
long splinter deeply under his nail, and that since then
he had been suffering from violent convulsions. One
look at the patient told me that he wras threatened with
a most horrible death by lockjaw if the cause of the
trouble was not at once removed, and I hinted as much
to the mother, who thereupon broke forth in violent
curses against everything and everybody, including a
country where no surgeons could be found, for, as she
said, in Siberia people ought to be always in good health,
as in case of illness it is necessary to do without medi-
cal assistance. While we were thus employed, she in

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pouring forth dreadful invectives and I in trying to calm
her, the boy suddenly gave an inarticulate cry and
fell into a fit of hideous tetanic convulsions. His thin,
emaciated body became contracted by spasms which
drew him backward in so frightful a fashion that his
head and heels almost touched each other, forming a
ri^id arch, while his neck and throat stiffened to burst-
ing. I called to the mother to help me hold him down,
but she was either too drunk or too frightened to heed
my words, and, before I could prevent him from doing
so, the patient had fallen from his miserable couch,
rolled to the floor, and, upsetting the table and the can-
dle, plunged us into total darkness. I seized hold of
him so as to prevent, if possible, his doing himself any
further injury, and called loudly for help. My cries
brought Ye"gor tearing into the room, followed by the
postmaster, who was carrying a lamp. The table was
soon set on its legs again, the light placed upon it,
and the men, having lifted the writhing lad from the
floor, held him down on the bench according to my direc-
tions, until the spasm ceased. Having learned from
the postmaster that no medical man could be reached
in the whole district, and that there was not even a
Feldsher (old soldier or military orderly who dresses
wounds and administers physic in Russian villages) to
be found far or near, I told the father, who was casting
wild looks about him, that his son was lost if a simple
operation were not at once performed. I had, of course,
by now some slight knowledge of plain surgery, and I
asked him whether he would like me to try what I could
do to save the boy.

Glancing at poor little Yvan, who was visibly in the
last stages of exhaustion now that the acute attack
had subsided, his father replied, with a growl: "Try
if you like, but if you don't relieve him, I'll kill you

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

and your beast of a servant with you!" With which
encouraging speech — one that Y6gor would have re-
sented had I not pacified him with a peremptory look —
the Cossack giant seized a sharp axe lying on the floor,
and, placing it between his knees, squatted down on an
overturned box, and waited there in order to put un-
doubtedly his amiable threats to instant execution.
I shrugged my shoulders, knowing well what brag-
garts the Russian peasants are, and bade Ye"gor bring
me my travelling-chest of medicines, which contained
also a few unpretentious surgical instruments. The
scene was dismal beyond words, for what between the
howls of the storm raging outside and the dirt and
squalor of the room in which we were assembled, there
was enough, without the singularly dramatic condition
of affairs, to shake the nerves of the coolest of human
beings. The three Cossacks of my escort were snoring
in the adjoining room, where they had cast themselves
down before the stove to sleep the heavy sleep of drunk-
enness. The mother, crouching on the ground beside
her husband, shed maudlin tears, and the husband
himself was watching me savagely as I selected a small
pair of forceps and a bistoury from my little surgical
case.

I will not enter here into any details of the operation,
which was a singularly long and painful one, thanks
to the condition of my patient and to my own nervous-
ness. I did the best I could under the circumstances;
that is all I can say for myself; and when I got through
I had the gratification of seeing young Yvan drop into
a deep and peaceful sleep under the influence of thirty
drops of laudanum which I had administered to him,
and also to receive the somewhat shamefaced thanks
of the father, who relinquished his formidable weapon
and left the room muttering words of regret for his past

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

violence. He spoke to the other Cossacks, and soon
brought UK-HI round to a better frame of mind; for an
hour later everything was ready for our departure, and
the contrite and sobered ix>stmaster went so far as to
m\e us cheering indications as to the route followed
by the chain of convicts, so that we ended by starting
under altogether altered and favorable auspices.

We travelled without rest for two days and nights,
enduring more torments than I care to describe ; but our
perseverance was rewarded at last, for at eight o'clock
in the morning, just fifty hours after leaving the post-
station where we had met with so startling and un-
gracious a reception, we reached a long, straggling
village consisting of a double line of miserable-looking
log -cabins, with a post-house painted a bright blue
standing a little back from the road. In front of this
building were several hundred convicts surrounded by a
cordon of soldiers armed to the teeth. Crowds of chil-
dren and peasant women were distributing to them
loaves of coarse black bread and little round cheeses,
which the poor wretches fell to devouring greedily as
soon as they received them.

The jingling of the chains and the muttering voices
of the exiles made a most dismal and ghastly concert,
and as my kibitka forced its way through, the throng,
tears of sympathy for these melancholy travellers rose
to my eyes. The air was so thick with drifting snow-
flakes that we could hardly distinguish anything, but
the little we did see was enough to hurt one's very soul.
Many disabled and tired-out convicts were lying down
in the freshly fallen snow, unable to take another step,
and an officer of Cossacks was inspecting the irons of
some pallid-faced wretches who were being marched
past him.

The convicts stared at us with great curiosity, as we

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got out of our sleigh and entered the station-house, and
a few of them even removed their tattered woollen caps
in respectful salutation. I made up my mind, as I gazed
upon them, to inform the Czar of all this condemnable
harshness, and I mentally registered a vow to enlighten
him on the subject if I ever reached St. Petersburg once
more. I may add that this vow was religiously kept
later on, although it was no easy task to impress the
Emperor with the horror of the spectacle presented by
these haggard men walking backward and forward on
the snow, attempting by violent exercise to keep them-
selves from freezing alive, nor to describe to him the
livid countenances caused by the stiff and aching limbs,
the countless privations, and want of proper food and
clothing endured by the condemned offenders I saw
before me.

Indeed, it was with a heavy heart that I entered the
low-ceiled room where several officers and guards were
warming themselves around the stove.

I at once inquired for the officer in command of the
convoy, and after some delay he presented himself before
me. He was a tall, broad-shouldered man, clean shaven
but for a long reddish mustache ; his hair was closely
cropped, and his forehead and bushy eyebrows pro-
truded forbiddingly over his light-colored, piercing eyes.
Taken altogether, his appearance gave one the impres-
sion of his being a nasty customer to deal with. He
stood bolt upright a few steps from me in the attitude
which in military language is designated as " at atten-
tion/' and saluted me with the grace of an automa-
ton.

" You have among your prisoners a man of the name
of Fedor Andreitch, I believe/' I said to him.

He pretended for a moment to consult his memory,
and then answered, in a loud, metallic voice: "Yes,

28*

I

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

your nobility, there is an unruly fellow of that name
in our chain of convicts. He is called now, however,
number 179."

As soon as the words were pronounced his mouth
closed spasmodically, and his head, which he had
turned towards me while speaking, reverted with a jerk
to its former position of "attention."

"Then here are some papers which will show you
that by the order of his Majesty the Czar, this convict
is to be set free and delivered into my hands/' I con-
tinued, handing him the documents in question.

He carefully perused them from beginning to end,
then looked puzzled and stared at me vacantly. At last
he said, in the same monotonous fashion he had used
before :

" This paper bears the name of one Ye"gor Nikolaitch
Ful6w : that is not your nobility?"

I readily perceived that I had adopted an utterly false
method, and therefore hastened to repair my mistake
by explaining matters to him as glibly as I could.

When I ceased speaking he knit his brow, scratched
the back of his head, and then, wheeling to the right
about, he took three paces in the direction of the door.
Suddenly, however, he hesitated, turned on his heel,
and, once more approaching me, said, shortly :

"I cannot give up the prisoner without the sanction
of the governor of the province."

I tapped my foot impatiently on the floor and asked
him whether an order from the Emperor needed, in his
eyes, sanction from anybody. To this he made no
answer, but stood motionless in a manner which would
have tried the patience of an ancient Stoic, and, sad to
relate, nothing that either Y£gor or I could say seemed to
produce the slightest effect upon him.

Things were looking their blackest, and I had almost
T 289

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

despaired of ever coming to any satisfactory under-
standing with this man, when they took the most un-
expected turn, and, as in a novel, a deus ex machina,
appeared miraculously on the scene at our worst hour
of need.

The crack of a whip and the shrill jingle of sleigh-
bells were heard. The door was thrown open, and a
gentleman wearing a general's uniform marched into
the room. I learned later that he was the military govern-
or of the district, and that he was accidentally passing
through the village, where he had stopped to change
horses. Curiously enough, the worthy creature seemed
to know me well by sight, and when he discovered me in
the filthy post-house of this far-Siberian settlement,
the extremity of his amazement was most amusing to
witness. There are snobs on every rung of the social
ladder in Russia, as well as in every other country of
the world, and this explains the enthusiasm with which
this high official greeted me.

"Is it possible/' he exclaimed, "that I should behold
so lofty a personage in this dismal place? And if my
eyes do not mislead me, can I be of any service?"

Much surprised at this grandiloquent tirade, for, un-
less the general had seen me at some court reception in
St. Petersburg or Moscow, I certainly had not the faint-
est recollection of ever having met him before ; I never-
theless explained my dilemma to him with the greatest
possible despatch.

His rage when I told him that the officer in charge of
the convicts refused to obey my injunction was a de-
lightful relief to me and most ludicrous to behold. He
raved and swore till I thought that an apoplectic seizure
would be the reward of his overweening energy.

"Do you know, sir, whom you have the honor of
seeing before you?" he yelled to his unfortunate sub-

290

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

linate; and, pointing towards me, he began to enu-

jrate my titles and dignities at such a length and
rith so much eloquence that sheer modesty forbids me

transcribe his words here. The captain of Cossacks,
rho seemed ready to sink through the floor, muttered

>me obsequious excuses.

" Don't speak to me ; you are a disgrace to the country
rhich you have the altogether undeserved privilege of

•ving!" roared the general, crossing his arms on his

it chest and glaring furiously at the crestfallen officer.
Go and fetch this gentleman whom this noble lady
come so far to rescue from your clutches, and show
him proper respect, I beg of you."

Proper respect to a convict, whom the general governor
designated as "a gentleman." The nonplussed officer
looked as if he might have dropped with surprise.

His intelligence was not sufficiently great to show him
that his superior cared very little whether thousands of
exiles were left to rot under the Siberian ice every year,
but that he cared very much to obtain the good graces
of his Majesty the Czar by serving him in this instance.
At any rate he obeyed with remarkable alacrity, and a
few minutes later re-entered the room, followed by a
young man wearing the tolu-shuba, or long coat of sheep-
skin, with the tanned side out, which is the garment of
marching convicts; dark-blue wroollen trousers, long,
loose boots, big leather mittens, and a worsted cap
drawn over the ears, his heavy leg-fetters being held to-
gether by a long, clanking chain attached to a broad
leather belt, and a tattered crimson handkerchief bound
around his throat.

The face and figure of this man were in glaring con-
trast with his infamous garb. He was tall, fair, and
athletic, with a high-bred look on his remarkably beau-
tiful aquiline features, but exposure and fatigue had

291

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

worn his splendid frame and emaciated his hand-
some face. I had risen, and as he came near I held
out my hand to him in welcome, saying, with some
emotion : " I am very happy to have found you at last,
Fe"dor Andreitch, and to be able to hand you the Em-
peror's free pardon/' As I spoke his eloquent and
feverish eyes sought mine with an agony of doubt and
anguish, for the officer had evidently not told him what
awaited him. A shiver shook him and a sob rose in
his throat.

" Is it true ?" he said, in a dreamy, hesitating voice.

" It is ; I have come to fetch you, and to bring you back
to those you love."

" Are you an angel come down from heaven to save
me?" he said, passionately, his white lips pronouncing
the words so low that they hardly stirred the air. Then,
with a sudden motion of his tall figure, he knelt down
on the beaten earth before me, and, burying his face in
the folds of my cloak, he broke into those heartrending
sobs which shake strong men in their agony.

We were alone now. The general, with a tact for
which I would not have given him credit, had ordered
every one out of the room and had taken himself off for
the time being. I bent over the kneeling man, softly
touching his bowed head, as I would have done that of a
troubled child, and whispered words of comfort and of
hope. Gradually the paroxysm subsided; he lifted his
eyes to mine and gazed on me with an expression of
grateful adoration and joy which went far towards re-
warding me for the hardships I had lately undergone
on his behalf. When he grew quieter I related to him
briefly the events which had brought me to Siberia, and
asked him whether he felt strong enough to start that
same day for St. Petersburg. I could not help noticing,
in spite of his efforts to conceal the fact, how much he

292

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

had suffered from his terrible experiences on the Sibe-
rian road, for a hard, dry cough shook him intermit-
tently, and there were hectic spots on his thin cheeks.
He would, however, hear of no delay, and implored me
to start as soon as possible.

His agitation was something terrible to behold, and
for more than an hour he paced the length of the dingy
room to and fro, overcome by feelings which he could not
master. In vain I urged him to lie down for a few hours.
The shock had been too great; the moral resurrec-
tion through which he had gone had brought on a
high fever which nothing seemed to soothe. In the
meanwhile, with the help of the kindly general, who
went to no end of trouble on this memorable occasion, I
procured some clothes for Fe*dor, and that afternoon we
set off on our return journey. The general -governor
had begged us to come and stay for a few days at his
residence, which was only fifty versts off, and I must
say that I was so anxious to see my patient — as I now
considered him to be — take the repose he so much need-
ed, that I pleaded my own fatigue as a reason for ac-
cepting this invitation for twenty-four hours.

The government-house was a stout, shambling build-
ing made of logs, like all houses in Siberia, sheltered,
after a fashion, from the sweeping wind by clumps of
remarkably well -grown pine-trees. We arrived there
about six o'clock in the evening, and were most cordial-
ly and affectionately received by the general's wife, a
fat, motherly, middle-aged lady, with a fresh, healthy
complexion, who wore a remarkable structure of lace and
ribbons upon her head, and a stiff purple silk gown,
which rustled like strong paper when she walked.

Dishes of cold meat, tea, eggs, boiled dried fruit, and
cheese composed the meal, but, simple as was this fare,
it was such a comfort to sit once more at a table, in a

293

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

clean, warm room, and to eat off china and silver, that I
do not think I ever enjoyed a repast as I did this one.
Both my host and hostess treated me with so much
elaborate ceremony, however, that my pleasure was
somewhat marred thereby, and I was relieved when, some
little time after supper, I was at last conducted to my
rooms. There were no chests of drawers, wardrobes,
or cupboards in my apartment, but I found an immense
sofa, some large arm-chairs, and a long ottoman, which
left but little space to move about in. I noticed also
regretfully that there was no bath, but I remedied this
by means of my rubber travelling-tub. In the morning
I had the pleasure of discovering that there was a bath-
room in the house, and a very large and comfortable
one, too.

Nothing could exceed the kindness of my entertain-
ers. When I rose I found my hostess in the large bath-
room mentioned, getting it ready for me with her own
hands, carefully seeing that the temperature was cor-
rect, and on my return to my own rooms discovered that
a huge open fire had been lit in spite of the big one
roaring in the porcelain stove in case of a chill after my
warm plunge.

My hostess had three children, and was evidently very
much devoted to them, but I observed that she never
kissed them even to say good-night, a pat on the head
being the only sign of affection that she ever gave them.
On my speaking of this to her, she answered, "But I
give them my hand to kiss," and added, "I think you
foreigners kiss your children too much. It is not good
for them." I smiled at this, but I must say that her
boys were robust, like young bear cubs, which they
somewhat resembled, for they had real Tartar faces;
they were, it is true, somewhat heavy and stupid, but
their doting father never tired of relating their many

294 ,

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

exploits and their many deeds of courage when they
accompanied him wolf-hunting.

In this atmosphere of sympathy and peace F£dor
Andreitch seemed to revive with every passing hour.
His bearing and manners were those of a refined and
cultured gentleman. It was inevitable that his recent
sufferings should have left indelible traces on his coun-
tenance, and he still looked fatigued, but there was
something so winning about him that he became at once
a general favorite. We were genuinely sorry to have
to say good-bye to our new friends and to their hospitable
house, yet, now that we were thoroughly rested, we felt
that every moment of delay was fraught with needless
cruelty to Nadeje. We started, accompanied by the
good wishes of the general and his family, who, in spite
of the faling snow and the extreme severity of the tem-
perature, stood on the door-steps waving adieus to us
until we disappeared from view.

On the third day of our return trip we witnessed the
most magnificent spectacle which it is possible to con-
ceive. The snow had ceased to fall early in the morn-
ing, and towards mid-day the sun, which had not
shone upon me since our departure from St. Petersburg,
suddenly broke through the dense gray layers of clouds,
its golden rays transforming the gloomy landscape like
the wand of a magician. No pen can describe the
dazzling splendor of the endless frozen plains shimmer-
ing like waves of molten silver to where the horizon
melted in a faint blue line against the yet paler blue
of the sky. Every branch of the bushes, every blade and
tuft of the frozen reeds sheathed in transparent ice re-
flected the light in rainbow hues, and as the wind lifted
some of the loose snow far up into the air it seemed to us
as if we were surrounded by a slight veil of crystals
wonderfully spun by the hands of a genie.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

We gazed at this beautiful scene, speechless with awe
and admiration. Even our Cossacks, who generally
looked as interested in our surroundings as bears awak-
ened before they had done hibernating, actually gave
vent to a series of enthusiastic if rather discordant
hurrahs. The horses seemed to catch the infection,
and, bounding like deers, they flew over the snow with
the fleetness of zephyrs. Unfortunately this delicious
state of things did not last very long, and after an in-
tensely cold, starlit night the weather relapsed into storm
and falling snow which followed the faint red of a sullen
winter's dawn.

On that day I came upon a flower which at that time
was completely unknown outside of Russia's greatest
and most arid province, but which since then, I believe,
has found its place in the herbarium of many a dis-
tinguished botanist. My Cossacks told me that this
blossom was called the " luck star " or the " snow flower/'
and, for all I know to the contrary, it may still bear these
names in the far Northern lands where it has its home.
It grows only where snow covers the ground for many
months, and raises its wonderful head from the frozen,
glittering surface of the steppe. It begins to bloom
at the beginning of January, opens in a day, and, at the
end of the third day succeeding its glorious birth, fades
and dies. It has five petals, each being four inches
in diameter, covered with what looks like crystallized
snow. The petals are exquisitely formed in the shape
of a large star, and at the end of each sparkles an oc-
tagonal point like a diamond or a huge petrified dew-
drop. These are the seed-pods of this marvellous plant.
It is claimed that whenever the wearied traveller meets
on his road this heavenly-looking blossom it brings
hope and good-luck to him, and thus it is revered — nay,
almost worshipped — on the grim plains of Siberia.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Driving on and on, never pausing save to change
horses and to take a hurried meal at a post-house, we
went through the same tedious routine I had already
experienced; but at last we reached Ekaterinburg, and
put up at the palatial Plotinkof. Arrived there, I
sent a despatch to Nadeje, telling her of Fe"dor's safety.
The latter, as we came nearer to our destination, puzzled
me by his gradually sinking energy. He often slept for
hours together during the end of our trip in the kibitka,
and when awake his mind seemed absorbed and full of
dull, feverish day-dreams. At first he had talked al-
most unceasingly of Nadeje and of their child, but now
he never mentioned their names. Once I asked him
to tell me what ailed him, and, fixing his dark-blue eyes
on me very sadly, he said, simply :

"The ineffaceable past lies heavily upon me, and is
like a ghost tracking my steps. I did wrong when I
induced Nadeje to marry me secretly, and this thought
hangs like a millstone about my neck. My punishment
has been hard already, but never so hard as now, when
I have seen what you, madame, have undergone to
save me."

"Do not say that!" I exclaimed, much annoyed.

'You have no need to regret anything so far as I am

concerned. This trip has been to me a pleasant novelty

in a monotonous round of self-indulgence, and also a

great pleasure, I assure you."

He shook his head and murmured wistfully: "You
say so, and I wish I could believe you, but it does not
lessen my debt of gratitude, a debt which I can never
repay."

"Nonsense!" I rejoined, impatiently; "when I see you
living happily with your Nadeje I will be more than
repaid for a little trouble and fatigue." But as I said
the words a curious feeling of doubt assailed me, and I

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

wondered what of happiness or sorrow lay in the future
for the young couple in whom I had taken so great an
interest, although our acquaintance was, comparatively
speaking, so short.

We stayed two days at Ekaterinburg, and then went
on to Moscow and thence home, where we arrived at
last, one evening, much exhausted, but greatly pleased
to see the end of our exhausting journey. I left Fedor
at the door of the Imperial H6tel, promising to com-
municate with him as soon as I had seen Nadeje and
had prepared her for the joy of their reunion.

A storm of reproaches awaited me at home. My hus-
band, who had by this time learned my reasons for going
to Russia, was in a towering rage. He received me with
a very magnificent speech which, if it did not impress
me much, had at any rate the merit of coming straight
from the heart. The position was a trying one for him,
I readily acknowledge, for although he liked publicity
himself, he hated anybody else to attract it, and the
news of my Siberian undertaking had, through some
indiscretion on the part of my servants, become uni-
versally known, so that, to his great chagrin, I had
created a genuine sensation. As I declined to receive
his admonitions in a tame spirit, he soon cooled down,
and the subject was dropped for the nonce.

The next morning I drove to the address given to me
by Nadeje as that <5f the house where she lived with her
father. It was in an old quarter of the town, somewhere
near the river, and the place looked dark and dismal
on this blustering, rainy forenoon to inspire one with
positive ideas of suicide. I sent my footman to inquire
whether I could see the mistress of the house, and was
surprised and distressed to hear that she had been from
home for a week, but that der gnddige Herr was in ! I
immediately decided to see the old gentleman, and to

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

find out, without, of course, betraying his daughter's
secret, where I could find her. With some difficulty, I
obtained admittance, and was ushered by an aged
man-servant, clothed in funereal black, into a mel-
ancholy salon looking out on to a narrow, gloomy
street.

Everything in that room was singularly depressing :
the sombre hangings and ebony furniture, stiffly ar-
ranged on the oaken floor, which was waxed and pol-
ished to a dangerous extent, and had an uninhabited
appearance. The large coal fire burning in the grate
did not succeed in brightening this preternaturally un-
friendly apartment.

I waited so long that I was on the point of ringing the
bell to remind the household of my presence, when the
door opened and a man, who must have been sixty years
of age at least, if not more, though still erect and un-
bending, entered. His black eyes flashed with sullen
fires, and his thin-lipped mouth had something cruel
about it which I thought very repellent. He bowed
low before me, and asked in excellent German to what
he was indebted for the honor of a call from me.

"I came with the hope of meeting your daughter,"
I said to him, " but your man informs me that she is not
here. Would you oblige me by letting me know where
I may write to her?"

He shot a look of deep aversion at me, then, control-
ling himself with evident effort, he said, in a strange,
hollow voice :

" I have no longer a daughter. She forfeited all claim
to my affection when she debased herself by a secret
marriage with a man whom I had forbidden her to ever
so much as speak to."

"Do not say such words/' I said, sternly; "your
daughter has sacrificed her happiness for your sake,

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

and the secrecy of her marriage was only the result of
your unjust prejudice/'

He listened to me with bitter scorn depicted on his
sharp, pale features.

" I do not wish to lack in courtesy towards a lady of
your exalted rank, madame, and yet I must decline to
discuss this matter any further with you. Ever since I
discovered my daughter's treachery she has been dead
to me, and nothing will make me reconsider my de-
cision so far as she is concerned/'

His voice was cold and resolute, and I saw that, as he
said himself, nothing could move him in his resolve.

"Will you at least tell me what has become of her?"
I exclaimed, forgetting in the intensity of my eagerness
to resent this strange personage's extraordinary manner.

He hesitated a moment, then reluctantly replied:

" She was summoned to R a week ago. That is all

I know; ask me no more."

She has gone to her child, I thought to myself, with
a pang of pity for the poor young mother, as I listened
with anger rising in my heart. But I knew now what I
had come to learn, and, with a slight inclination of the
head, I walked across the room, too provoked to trust
myself to speak. When I reached the threshold I turned
and involuntarily looked back. He was still standing
by the mantel-piece, his face motionless and as bloodless
as that of a corpse, and the expression of his eyes was
so relentless and fierce that I could not help exclaiming :

"You will yet live to regret what you have done!"
Then I walked rapidly down-stairs, deeply concerned
at the unexpected turn which this sad affair was taking.

On my way to the hotel I vainly puzzled my brain,
wondering how this awful old gentleman had come
upon his daughter's secret. But even with the help of
F6dor — who was intensely distressed by what I told him

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—I could not imagine how it had happened. The poor
fellow looked vso wretched that I became seriously anx-
ious about him. We decided that he had better start
for R— - without further delay, and I made him prom-
ise to let me know at once how he found Nadeje and her
baby, and also not to hesitate to call me should he need
my help. We knew where Nadeje was, that was all,
and we were thankful for that, but, unfortunately, her
only friends, who were also F&Ior's relatives, were win-
tering in Egypt, and so we were unable to ascertain
what had occurred during my absence. The young
husband was almost beside himself with grief at the
thought of the misery which the hapless girl he had
married must have endured for his sake, and a heavy
sense of guilt lay upon him. Indeed, I was amazed by
the ravages these emotions were working upon him,
and I began to wonder how long his strength would last
if this state of affairs did not change for the better very
soon.

Three days went by without bringing me any news.
I had once more resumed the ceaseless gayeties of my
hollow mundane existence. The Fasching was particu-
larly brilliant that year, and I was immediately caught
in a regular whirlpool of dinners, balls, and receptions,
until my Siberian tour seemed but a dream of my fancy.

On the night of the third day I had just come home
from a ball at the English Embassy, and was sitting in
my dressing-room, when my chief woman-in-waiting
brought me a telegraphic message. I tore open the enve-
lope and read the following words with a start of horror :

"She is dying, and is asking for you. Can you come to us?

" FEDOR."

I gazed vacantly for a moment at the pink silk hang-
ings on the walls, at the great mirrors which reflected

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the light of the lamps, and I unconsciously pushed from
me a bowl of lilies which stood on a table near me, for
their perfume suddenly sickened me. The news was so
unexpected that I felt dazed and stunned. Dying — this
poor girl to whom I had restored her beloved husband !
It seemed cruel enough to be true, although I could
hardly realize it! I decided to start by the first train I
could catch, and I was glad of the bustle of preparation
attending my hurried departure, for it kept me from
thinking, and drove away, in a measure, my anxiety.
One cannot devote many weeks of one's life to the
service of friends without becoming proportionately at-
tached to them, and the young couple had gradually
crept into my affections.

I took the early train south, and went straight on to
the coast. I knew the exact situation of the villa where
Nadeje's baby had been born, and therefore, on alight-
ing from the train, I drove at once to the small seaport
of R .

This lovely part of the world is but little known to the
ordinary globe-trotter, a fact which has always sur-
prised me, for the scenery is beautiful, and possesses a
savage grandeur seldom to be met with in more civilized
countries. The shore is perilously abrupt, and the
great red cliffs, crowned with cacti and olive-trees, press
around and seem to shut in on every side a series of
semi-landlocked lakes where the great waves of the
sea have hollowed out deep caverns and crevices.

The villa Rodoi'tza nestled in a nook of the bay where
aloes and mimosa grew thickly, and was reached by a
winding flower-lined path which led up to it along a
steep incline cut out of the live rock.

The weather was perfect, and as I proceeded rapidly
towards my destination I could not help admiring the
sublimity of the landscape which appeared to me all the

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re delightful after the bleakness of the northern re-
gions which I had so recently left behind me. The sea
as buoyant, but not rough, and the long, curling waves
f the Adriatic beat rhythmically on the sands far below
he road I was following. Flocks of white-winged gulls
flew above the water, dipping occasionally in the hollow
f the surge, while a wall of rock rose in many ridges
towards the road, where it ended in a thick hedge of

ckly-pear-trees and arbutus.

The villa was excessively pretty, and looked like a
miniature paradise, surrounded as it was by thickets
of tall rose-laurels and backed by huge palms. It was
low, white house, built of Ferrara marble, with a long

•ace studded at intervals with blue majolica vases
filled with blossoming plants. Blue-and-white awnings

tected the windows from the glare of the Southern
sun, and the entire place was so full of life, color, and
gayety that I could not imagine how so beautiful a place
could harbor death and sorrow.

The door was opened for me by an old woman wear-
ing the picturesque garb of the peasants of that region.
Her wrinkled face was very pale, and her eyes red and
swollen from weeping. Without saying a word, she
preceded me into a small but very pretty room with
panelled walls and old-rose hangings, and left me stand-
ing there in no enviable frame of mind. In a moment
more the heavy curtains of the doorway were quickly
drawn apart, and F6dor stood before me with the light
of the bright, joyful day shining on him and showing
me a face so white, so troubled, so drawn, that I rushed
towards him with outstretched hands, exclaiming :

" My poor boy, what has happened?"

Silently and quite feebly, as if all strength had gone
from him, he sank into a chair and looked at me dumbly
with the expression of an animal wounded unto death.

•

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Then, in a broken, stupefied fashion, while his eyes
gazed aimlessly through the open terrace windows, he
told me the sad story of the past few days.

I gathered therefrom that the baby had sickened from
diphtheria, and that the distracted foster-mother had
written to Nadeje, imploring her to come at once. By
some fatality the letter had fallen into the hands of the
girl's father, who, oblivious of his daughter's despair,
had turned her from his house. She, broken-hearted
and almost mad with pain and anxiety, started at once

for R , where she arrived only in time to see her

little one die. Weakened by fatigue and sorrow, she
had caught the dreadful disease, and that very morn-
ing, at dawn, had breathed her last.

I listened to all this, sorrowfully and mutely, for I was
unable to find words of consolation adequate to so
great a trial, and when F£dor asked me whether I would
care to see her again, I followed him wearily up-stairs
to a pretty pink-and- white room, where the young mother
lay on a bed with the fair head of her baby pillowed on
her breast. Armfuls of flowers had been thrown across
the coverlet and dropped on to the floor; in the cold
hands of the dead girl a cluster of white roses had been
placed, and the cushions on which her charming head
was reposing were covered with snowy violets. As I
knelt beside this fragrant couch of blossoms and verdure,
I thought of the many useless lives which are spared
while hers had been taken in all its beauty and strength
just when her dreams and hopes were about to be ful-
filled.

F£dor had implored me to remain with him for the
funeral, which was to take place on the morrow. I will
say nothing of those long hours which he and I spent
in the sunny villa over which death had spread its
gloom. We hardly ventured to speak to each other, for

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fear of breaking down, and I cannot remember having
ever before or since lived through such pathetic, tragic
moments.

The slow, melancholy day wore on. The clock ticked
tediously in the room where we sat together. Outside
the waves sparkled in the rays of the setting sun. The
fragrant air blowing over the gardens carried to us the
perfumes of flowers and of the sea. They brought us
food, but we could not take it.

At last, night came down, and the darkness was a
relief. Worn out in body, I slumbered where I sat,
awakening in the early morning with that heavy,
stunned feeling of anguish which follows a sudden
sorrow. When I opened my eyes I was alone, and
with surprise I heard the howling of the wind and the
beating of heavy rain against the casements. During
my short sleep one of those terrible storms so common
in those parts had swept down from the mountains,
and it seemed to me now as if nature itself were weeping
for the dead. The scene had entirely changed. Bois-
terous gusts drove the waves in frothy masses against
the foot of the cliffs. A thick veil of mist shrouded the
bay, and the heavens were overcast with greenish-gray
clouds.

I cannot, even now, remember that morning without
shuddering. It was so dreary and so very sad, this
funeral of mother and babe, carried to their last resting-
place in this chilly, misty, stormy day. The moaning
wind scattered the flowers on the white-draped coffin,
and the ceaseless rain drenched the reddish mould of the
little cemetery.

I see yet the tiny church, half hidden by dripping

ilex-trees, the wet grass on which we stood, while

the humble village priest sprinkled the grave with

Holy Water. I hear the piteous cry of agony wrung

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

from F6dor's lips as the first spadeful of earth rattled
on the coffin ! With a gesture of agonized supplication,
of heart-breaking pain, he stretched his arms out de-
spairingly and then fell forward senseless on the sodden
ground.

For many hours he did not recover consciousness,
and when at length he did so the village doctor, whom
I had called in, was evidently at his wits' ends to find
a name for his malady. I summoned the best medical
men from the nearest city, and they confirmed my fears.
Fedor was dying of meningitis.

The next four days were anxious and terrible. The
unfortunate man lay motionless in an almost continual
state of coma, never looking up or speaking, but often
holding my hand in his with the clinging tenacity of a
sick child. I hardly left him day or night, for as soon
as I withdrew my fingers, were it ever so gently, he be-
came restless and delirious. He slept little, and when
he awoke from occasional snatches of rest he fell into
comatose apathy again — apathy from which nothing
could rouse him. I knew that there was no chance
of recovery, and yet I hoped still against hope, and
the physicians and myself did all in our power to save
him.

At last the end came. On the fifth day after Nadeje's
funeral, still lying in that dreadful silence, he said, sud-
denly, in a scarcely audible voice :

"It will soon be over now, and you will be released
from all this worry."

I stooped over him and answered, softly :

"Do not say that; you may get well yet/'

The pallor of his face grew greater still as he feebly
pressed my fingers.

"It is better so/' he murmured, "better that I should
go now, while your hand is holding mine/' Then he

306

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added, with a childlike appeal in his quavering, breath-
less utterance : " Promise me not to leave me."

My eyes swam with tears as I heard him. "No, I
will not leave you, not for a moment, while you need
me. Have you so little faith in me that you doubt it?"

"I have caused you nothing but pain and trouble/'
he said, so faintly that I could hardly catch the words.
Then, with a sudden and surprising energy in one so
weak, he raised himself on his pillows and looked at
the glory of the rising sun which streamed through
the open windows and over the bed, a beautiful smile
beamed over his thin, emaciated, but still handsome
face, a deep sigh struggled from his breast and es-
caped his white lips, and he fell gently back into my
arms.

I closed the dark-fringed eyelids, gazed for a moment
at the countenance so peaceful in death, then, laying
my head down on the bed, I knelt beside him. How
long I remained there I never knew. I was aroused by
the physicians coming for their morning inspection, and
I let them lead me into the next room. Then for many
hours all grew dark about me.

The past months of fatigue and anxiety and over-
strain of mind had done their work, and, now that my
task was accomplished, I succumbed to an overwhelm-
ing lassitude and weariness.

Thanks to the strength of my constitution, I recov-
ered very quickly, and as soon as F6dor's funeral was
over I sailed for Madeira, where I was to rejoin my
Empress. The idea of returning at once to the world
was noxious to me, for I needed calm and peace, and
especially her presence, which to me was always the
best of panaceas, and it was only at the beginning of
the next winter that I returned home.

307

CHAPTER XVII

" On some his vigorous judgments light,
In that dread pause 'twixt day and night-
Life's closing twilight hour ;
Round some, ere yet they meet their doom,
Is shed the silence of the tomb,
The eternal shadows lower."

THE Emperor and Empress had just retired, but
many members of the court were still scattered about
here and there in the dazzlingly lighted rooms of the
palace, discussing the various events of the court ball,
while the strains of the last waltz of the Hof-Kapelle
floated on the perfumed air.

As we stood for a moment in the crowded throne-
room — Karl, Frederick, and myself — we appeared to
attract an unusual amount of attention. Fred, who
had arrived a few days before, was arrayed in the full
dress of a Scottish laird — with kilt, claymore, and tar-
tan— which might have accounted for the unwonted
curiosity displayed, while Karl, whose embroidered
dolman was covered with decorations, looked, it is true,
handsomer, and of yet more commanding presence
than was his wont. Still, all this very marked if cour-
teously repressed attention puzzled me. My husband's
features bore a marked expression of haughtiness and
a blase look which, coupled with the strange shiftiness
of his blue eyes, made his face more than ever unat-
tractive to me. A glance at him always sufficed to
convince that he was a man who could not be trusted,
and who might become a very ugly customer on the

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

slightest provocation — as those who served under his
orders had bitter occasion to know. I was aware, of
course, that I was looking my best, always a pleasant
feeling, even to the least vain of women. My court -
mantle, which was attached to my shoulders by dia-
mond fteur-de-lys, was of rose-leaf velvet, edged with a
thick garland of natural white lilac. The skirt and
corsage were of old Venetian point, strewn with clusters
of lilac, and my neck and arms were blazing with dia-
monds, pink pearls, and rubies. I turned to speak to
Karl's greatest friend and confidant, Count Paul, a
tall, slight, dark-eyed lieutenant in the guards, who for
the last year or two had been my husband's constant
companion and crony, besides being his favorite aide-
de-camp.

" I wish we were well out of this/' I exclaimed, draw-
ing my train aside to allow a score of officers to pass;
"only it is too early yet to go to bed."

" Why don't we go and have some supper," said Fred ;
smiling. "The buffet here is not what I admire most."

" All right," replied Karl, " that's what I call a sensible
proposal. You had better drive with Muzzi in her car-
riage, Fred; I will follow in yours, with Paul, and we
shall be there almost as soon as you will."

" I had rather you would come with us, Karl," I in-
terposed, hastily.

" What for?" he replied, peevishly. " Can't Fred take
care of you ? Please do as I ask you, and don't regret
our presence too much, for your train would be ruth-
lessly crushed."

I shrugged my shoulders as we turned to go, and we
rapidly passed through the long suite of salons, the white
walls of which were illuminated by myriads of wax
candles, in rock-crystal sconces and candelabra. Groups
of pink and white blossoms backed by tall, feathery

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palms and fragrant mimosa, filled every corner, and
were tastefully arranged in front of the countless mirrors
which stood between the long rows of windows.

Reaching the palace hall at last, we stopped a mo-
ment to talk to Count K., who wore a blue- velvet,
fur-bordered Attila thickly covered with jewels, as were
the hilt of his damascened sword, the aigrette on his
kalp&k, and the heavy gold belt which encircled his yet
slender waist. He looked every inch what he was, a
soldier as well as a great statesman, and it seemed
but just and fair that he should hold as he did one of
the highest positions in the land. Looking up at him
with a smile, I asked him if he were not very glad that
the ball was over.

" You must feel so warm in all your splendor," I added,
touching the fur-lined dolman which hung by golden
cords from his left shoulder with the tips of my fingers.

" Indeed I do ; but don't let us talk about so uninter-
esting a subject as myself. Allow me to congratulate
you on your appearance. You are the very personifi-
cation of youth and loveliness."

"Fie, Excellency! What a flatterer you are! I am
afraid that I shall have to avoid you in future."

"You know that I mean what I say, always," mur-
mured the old courtier, as he offered me his arm to lead
me to my carriage, which had just been announced.

"I must believe you then," I rejoined, laughingly, a
I entered my brougham, followed by Fred. While the
equipage was moving off at a sharp trot, I thrust my
head out of the window, and with the freedom of an
already long acquaintance I kissed my hand to the
Count, who was still standing bareheaded on the marble
steps of the portico.

The lights from the carriage lamps and the street gas
were strong enough to let Fred see my features perfectly

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

11

and I was vexed with myself to observe that he noticed
how all my gayety and animation dropped like a mask,
and that I lay back in the carriage with a deep and
weary sigh.

"What is the matter, Muzzi?" he asked, taking in his
own my hand, which lay idly in my lap, and bending
his handsome head to look into my face. "Are you
tired? Has something pained you?"

His voice was not very steady, and his eyes betrayed
a depth of tenderness which disagreeably startled me.
I unconsciously drew myself up, and, turning away my
head, I replied in a quiet tone, the effect of which I fear
was spoiled by the involuntary flutter of my hand as I
withdrew it from his clasp :

" Yes, I suppose I am tired. This evening has been
dreadfully long, and court balls are always a bore."

He evidently understood that I did not choose to men-
tion the true cause of my listlessness, and for the re-
mainder of our short drive he remained mute.

On alighting at S.'s famous restaurant, Fred at once
asked for a private salon, and we were ushered into
a small but eminently comfortable room, which was
thrown open with a flourish by the head-waiter. As the
door closed upon us I unwound the lace scarf which
protected my head and threw off my long wrap. I was
just approaching the mirror to arrange the curls on my
forehead, which had been slightly ruffled by the weight
of my tiara, when there was an audible scuffle in
the passage outside the door, and the voice of the Ober-
Kellner was heard to exclaim :

"You must not enter; this room is occupied. I re-
tfully beg pardon, but I cannot let any one pass."

We looked at each other perfectly amazed, for it was
my husband who replied, in angry tones :

" Don't talk such trash. It's my wife who is in there,

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Robert/' At this moment Fred, hastily opening the
door, interposed himself between three or four waiters
and my husband, saying with intense astonishment :

"Good Heavens! my dear fellow, what is all this
about?"

" Only that these good people here imagine that I will
be de trop between you and my wife/' replied Karl, with
a sneer, rudely brushing past Fred and entering the
room.

He was evidently much annoyed, and for once not
quite without cause ; but seeing the frown on the young
Scotchman's brow, he deemed it more politic to turn the
whole thing into a joke, and, flinging himself down on
a sofa, he added, with a cynical laugh :

" Oh ! our waiters are well trained here, and it would
be a wellnigh hopeless task for a man, whoever he might
be, to attempt following his wife too closely — that is, if
husbands cared to go to so much trouble nowadays/'

This last remark fell rather flat. I had taken up an
evening paper, which I pretended to be reading with
absorbing interest. Fred had left the room to order
the supper, and Count Paul was looking out of the
window, making a great show in his embarrassment
of admiring the file of equipages leaving the Grand
Opera-House on the other side of the broad thorough-
fare.

A few minutes later we sat down to a dainty supper,
at a small square table decked with mousseline glasses,
Dresden china, and shallow bowls of Russian violets
and narcissi. There was apparently no trace left of the
painful impression caused by the waiter's unfortunate
blunder, and the conversation soon became animated,
and even pleasant.

" What a quantity of charming women there were to-
night at the palace!" said I. "Did you notice Lady

3"

I

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

L., Fred? I think she is the loveliest Englishwoman
that I ever met."

"She is certainly very fine -looking," replied Fred,
" but I do not admire her greatly. I never fancy those
Juno-like women."

" You don't admire her, eh? Well, we all know that
your ideal woman is of a very different type," snarled
Karl, with a quick glance of scarcely veiled imperti-
nence at me. But I took care to give no sign of ap-
plying his remark to myself.

" Lady L. is an admirable creature in every sense
of the word," continued my husband; "besides which
she is one of the best-dressed and most graceful women
in our English colony."

"I think one can hardly say that," I could not help
replying. " For instance, her gown to-night was quite
unsuited to the occasion. It would have been well
enough for an ordinary ball, but it was neither worthy
of a court reception nor of the splendid jewels she saw
fit to wear with it."

"You are very critical, Muzzi, and very unjustly
so. I must say that I admire the comparative sim-
plicity and modesty of that gown extremely. It is
quite refreshing to meet a woman for once in a way who
does not appear in public in the super-chic garb so fash-
ionable now," he added, glancing significantly at my
laces and lilacs.

His intention of teasing me was so patent that
Count Paul attempted to change the conversation.
Karl was determined, however, to make me pay for
the ridicule with which he had been covered at the
moment of his ludicrously sensational arrival at the
restaurant, and, unceremoniously interrupting his
friend, he exclaimed :

" You women of the world ought to be told the truth

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

sometimes. One blushes for you when one sees you
wearing dresses that would be considered overdone
even for a queen of the comic opera, and flirting nine-
teen to the dozen. How singular it is that you should,
all of you, insist upon imitating the ways and cus-
toms of the most notorious and most extravagant o.
characters 1 "

I raised my eyes from my plate and looked my hus-
band steadily in the face. I felt myself becoming a
shade paler, but, fortunately, my voice was perfectly
calm, although I could not help there being a ring of
contempt in it as I said :

"Spare your blushes, my dear Karl; they are few
and far between, and therefore of untold value. If
there really are women, worthy of the name, who de-
base themselves by imitating the ladies you refer to
with so much good taste, they probably do so with a
view of pleasing men like you, who are, as is well
known, very fervent admirers of the genus you men-
tioned just now."

There was a burst of laughter at his expense, while
he gnawed his fair mustache viciously. He would, I
know, have turned upon me with a few more of his
sarcasms had it not been for the fact that the head-
waiter, approaching on tiptoe, presented to him a card
with some lines in pencil scribbled across it.

"Of course, of course!" he exclaimed, and, jumping
to his feet, he hastily whispered to me that Grand-
Duke A., who was supping in the neighboring salon
with the Muscovite ambassador, requested permission
to join us. A few minutes later the two Russians had
taken their places at our table. Fred relinquished his
seat on my right-hand to the Grand-Duke, and Count
Paul vacated the chair on my left for the benefit of
his Excellency, Count von M.

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Almost at once the Grand-Duke began to complain,
in his melodious, high-bred voice, of the terrible cold
which had set in since morning.

" Really, if this continues, I am afraid that we shall
have but a poor time to-morrow/' he said, plaintively,
alluding to an imperial hunt which was to be given
in his honor on the next day. " Our systems cannot
stand such severe weather. Do you mean to tell me,
Muzzi, that you will muster courage to accompany
us under such uninviting circumstances?"

"Oh yes," I replied, "I am very fond of hunting,
both a-horse and a-foot; it breaks the monotony of
one's existence."

Karl, who seemed to have fallen into one of his mood-
iest fits, looked up from the ortolan he was delicately
dismembering and exclaimed, impatiently:

"Women are utterly out of place in that kind of
sport, and are apt to bring men into peril, for no man
can possibly take care of himself while he has the
safety of a woman to attend to."

With which enunciation of doctrine he helped himself
to a glass of kiimmel from the square bottle at his elbow.

"Oh, I know," he continued, "there are people who
believe in the possibility of sport and flirtation hunting
in couples, but I do not. In my humble opinion, women
who take up that line of thing are unpardonable ; they
soon become as horsy as ourselves, and I call it more
than silly to attempt to shoot big game while dressed
up like figures from the carnival, and to follow us in the
furrows with a walk that is an absurd cross between a
swing and a strut!"

"How very ungallant you are!" said the Grand-
Duke, "and how very erroneous in your ideas! Why
do you not scold him, Muzzi?"

"Que voulez-vous il-y-tient! A few minutes ago he

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

attacked our costumes and our ways, with quite un-
necessary fervor. I am beginning to think that he
has mistaken his vocation ; he should have been a cou-
turier or a moralist! Moreover, his last sentence is
already known to me, for I heard it this very afternoon
from the august lips of the aged Archduchess, whom
we irreverently call ' Madame Miner ve ' at court. Karl
is a good and dutiful Telemachus, eagerly absorbing
and repeating the maxims of this sage petticoated
mentor!"

There was another laugh, and Karl, completely
routed, relapsed into a sulky silence. I, however, was
beginning to feel the effects of his singularly ill-timed
bad humor and of his unjustifiable behavior, and my
temper — always difficult to control, as I have confessed
before several times — was getting slowly the better of
all my good resolutions.

With a totally mirthless laugh, I therefore could not
resist the temptation of picking up the gauntlet which
he had so imprudently cast down at my feet, and, ner-
vously twisting my rings around my fingers, I contin-
ued, coolly:

" Let me give you the tenor of the delightful conver-
sation which I had with ' Madame Miner ve ' this very
afternoon. Her entree en matiere was worthy a great
tactician, for she went straight to the point, I can as-
sure you!

" ' There is nothing so hateful or so disgusting as an
unsexed woman!' she declared to me with a suddenness
which was amusing, ominously glowering at me through
the glasses which she had planted upon her haughty
nose.

"'May I venture to inquire whether your Imperial
Highness intends this remark for me?' I replied, meek-
ly, and with a heroic effort to control my merriment,

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for a tall pier-glass, which stood directly opposite me,
revealed my image to perfection, and my small stature
and youth did not appear to me at that instant to look
much like the typical virago.

'"Yes, my remark is intended for you, and I cannot
but regret to see that you are adopting a decidedly horsy
and sportive demeanor. Your love for the hunt and the
chase will end by changing you into one of the beings
I was just thinking of. Ah! dear me, to think of you,
young and dainty as you are now, and then to realize
that you will soon be transformed into one of those wom-
en who use the slang of the stables and of the race-
course whenever they open their mouths, who delight
in bruising their tender flesh with the recoil of a gun,
who swear and smoke, and walk in a shocking way
which is an unhappy mixture of a swing and a strut/
. . . I beg to attract your attention to the fact, mes-
seigneurs, that the 'swing and strut' are her own ex-
pression, not Karl's ; I am also sorry to confess that at
this juncture I burst into a peal of laughter which was
as irreverent as it was uncontrollable. Extremely of-
fended, the Archduchess rose from her chair and ad-
vanced towards me as if she were on the point of an-
nihilating me.

"'Laugh, my good child/ she said, with withering
scorn, ' but remember that I have warned you. Upon
my word, I do not know what has come to women lately.
If I were your husband, I would lock you up in a room
and keep you there until you mended your manners.'
And with a thoroughly dramatic gesture of horror she
swept out of the room, leaving me to digest her tirade as
best I might. I do not like the Archduchess, of course, for
she is, without a shadow of a doubt, the most overbear-
ing, narrow-minded, sarcastic, and unkind old woman
whom it has ever been my unhappy luck to encounter,

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

and I am forced to add that she dislikes me just as much
as I do her. I also have a temper of my own, as you
all know, and I most imprudently have displayed it
on more than one occasion in her presence, with the re-
sult that she believes me to be, I think, some kind of an
untamed little animal in need of an occasional lash of
the whip. That I do not take very kindly to these
periodical remonstrances goes without saying, and,
moreover, her disapproval of any of my actions makes
me all the more eager to persevere in the very course
condemned by her. I may, therefore, declare most
solemnly and truthfully here that my enthusiasm
for sports of all description, my love for breakneck
rides, four-in-hand driving, shooting big game, swim-
ming, fencing, et tutti quanti, is, if not begotten — for,
alas! alack! it was born in me — at least fostered and
strengthened by her opposition and by her scathing
criticisms. I do not wish to deny that the Archduchess
is a maitresse femme, with spirit enough for a hundred
cavalry soldiers. Cabinet ministers ar^e as babes in her
hands, and the entire court-circle is at her beck and
call. She looms large and imposing on the horizon of
the whole empire, and almost everybody bows before
her edicts, for, although she is not loved, her extreme
cleverness and marked superiority of intellect make it
?asy for her to rule her entourage with an unflinching
ceptre. Moreover, she shares beyond doubt Sgana-
rslle's opinion to the effect that 'cinq ou six coups de
batons ne font que ragaillardir I' affection.' But, with
lamentable short-sightedness, I decline to share her
views in the matter, and I set up my back defiantly,
notwithstanding the fact that my lord and master here
present chances to be one of her favorites and is as mal-
leable as wax in her hands."

" C'est bien fait pour toi," murmured the Grand-Duke

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

to Karl, who was staring at me in positive amaze-
ment this time, for I had seldom before accorded
sufficient importance to his words to answer him in
kind.

Soon afterwards the party broke up, and I drove home
alone, closely followed by Fred's brougham, in which
he and Karl were probably sitting side by side in utter
silence, for there was storm in the air, and certainly
neither of them would dream of unbending sufficiently
for small-talk.

The abrupt stopping of the carriage roused me from
my waking dreams, and I ran swiftly up-stairs to my
private suite, forgetting in my hurry to close the door of
the ante-chamber leading thereto.

When I had dismissed my women and re-entered my
bedroom, wrapped in a loose batiste gown, I stood at
the door petrified with surprise, for there, facing me,
stood my husband, his broad shoulder leaning against
the high mantel, and his head held defiantly up.
There was a faint smile on his lips.

"May I inquire," I said, quietly, "to what I am in-
debted for so flattering a tete-fr-tete? This is a strange
time of night to transact business — the only existing
tie between us now."

"You must excuse my intrusion," he replied, with a
sudden courtesy to which my attitude compelled him,
"but I am vexed and disgusted beyond description,
and I think that it will be wise if I let you know my
reasons for being, as I am, thrown out of my habitual
calmness and self-possession."

"You do me much honor in making me your confi-
dante, but, as I remarked before, the time is ill chosen."

"Never mind the time. I want you to explain to jn<
why you try to make my position unbearable at coin i
by your caprice and your repellent behavior towards a

319

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

personage of so exalted a rank that any other woman's
head would be turned by his admiration."

I glided into a low chair with an apparent docility
which, under the circumstances, both pleased and sur-
prised me, and, leaning my head upon my clasped hands,
I looked inquiringly at him.

"You must forgive me/' I said, slowly, "if I fail to
understand your meaning. I dare say I am dull to-
night. What are you alluding to?"

"Simply to this. You are a clever and thorough-
paced woman of the world, a great lady, and you are
surely sufficiently well versed in social tactics to know
how to keep a man's love at burning-point, without any
surrender on your part. But, instead of doing this, you
are, as usual, cold and brusque, allowing no possible loop-
hole in your attitude for a ray of hope which would serve
to lead on — well, we will mention no names — and yet
you know that my entire future, my whole ambitions,
depend upon the favor of this all-powerful person whom
you choose to repulse so unwarrantably/'

"What would you have me do?"

" Good heavens, Muzzi, what a question to ask I You
must be purposely trying to misunderstand me."

" I am afraid that I do understand you now/' I replied,
rising to my feet and confronting my husband. "Do
you mean to insinuate that I ought to encourage such
attentions? Is this your advice to your wife?"

"Pray do not jump at conclusions. You are not a
petite bourgeoise, and, moreover, you should not talk so
crudely."

"Indeed!" was all I said ; but I trust that the scorn in
my eyes intimated the rest. My contempt pierced Karl's
intense vanity and made him wince and smart.

" Yes, certainly, your words are unnecessarily crude,"
he repeated, sullenly scowling at me. " I do not need

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to take lessons from you ; the name I bear has a lustre
which has until now been among the greatest and most
undimmed in history/'

"Very likely/' I replied, trying to control my anger,
" but your extraordinarily azure blood does not prevent
you from asking me in so many words to sacrifice my
own feelings, not to mention my own conception of
honor, to your boundless ambition/'

A fearful rage held him speechless for a moment;
then he uttered a very ugly oath, which was an entirely
new departure from his usual courtesy, and exclaimed,
with a positively ferocious look :

"Be silent, if you cannot keep your words within
bounds/'

" Do you suppose for an instant that you can frighten
me?" I said, very quietly. "We had better not begin
to measure insults; my account against you is pretty
heavy, and can never be balanced on that score."

The quietness of my words lashed him to a worse
fury.

"By God! I will be your master yet!" he cried, sav-
agely, jumping up and attempting to seize me by the
wrist. "You shall learn to obey me, madame."

"Take care what you say," I replied, without even
raising my voice, and shaking myself free from his
grasp. " Do not try my patience too far, or you may
live to regret it. You have always preferred the lowest
kind of company to mine. You know how I abhor the
very sight of you. Go back to those who will welcome
such advice as you would give me, I say, and in future
spare me scenes of this kind. If we are to continue
to live under the same roof, the less we see of each
other in private the better."

He was silent, and in a measure subdued. He knew
well that his violence had been cowardly, and that by
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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

his covert advice he had disgraced both his name and
his rank. For one fleeting moment he looked as if he
felt ashamed of his unmanly behavior.

"Muzzi," he muttered, in lower tones, "I would pre-
fer you as a companion if we could understand each
other better/'

A shudder of intense repulsion shook me from head
to foot, and a feeling of absolute horror swept over me.

"Spare me such overtures at least! How dare you?
How dare you?" I continued, shaking all over with in-
dignation. "Now that you have offered me the worst
insult that a man can pass upon the woman who bears
his name, rest satisfied and leave me."

I put out my hand and pointed peremptorily to the
door. There was so much suppressed passion in the
action that he was momentarily cowed, and muttered,
sullenly :

"Do not be so melodramatic; you misunderstand
me."

"Misunderstand you? No, indeed, I do not. I know
you too well for that. But, thank God, I am getting
accustomed to the knowledge of your sins and vices,
and they are not the measure of my duty. Did you
think that it was for your sake that I am outwardly
indifferent to the life you lead? Were it so, I should
long ago have fled from you. But how can I expect
you to understand me? You, to whom honor and self-
respect are mere empty words?"

" You talk very confidently of your merits, madame.
You forget that women are changeable. Wait until
you have been really tempted before you boast of your
many virtues. They will last so long, and no longer!"

I really staggered, and I bit my lips in order to once
more master myself; then I said, in a voice hoarse with
ragv. •

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

"You are a coward, and beneath all contempt. Go,
or I shall truly become irresponsible for my actions!"

Beside himself with frenzy, my husband forgot that
he was a gentleman, and, advancing towards me, he
raised his arm as if to strike. Before he could touch
me, however, with a swift bound I reached the bell-rope,
and, grasping it, exclaimed :

"Leave this room at once, or I shall summon my
household, and never you dare to enter my presence
unbidden again, or you will have plenty of cause to
regret it."

Afraid that this delightful matrimonial scene should,
indeed, become public, he recovered himself, bowed low,
and walked towards the door, but, as he was about to
close it behind him, he said, viciously : v

" I'll make you far more sorry yet for what you have
said and done to-night, my fair lady, mark my words!"

When the noise of his footsteps had died away in the
distance, I dropped on my knees before the same dusky
wooden statue of the Madonna which had comforted my
childish sorrows, and which now hung, as of old, above
the praying-stool at the side of my bed, and gave way
to a fit of agonized weeping — a rare occurrence with me
under any circumstances. Never had I felt so utterly
forsaken and alone as I now did, but after a few moments
of exhaustive grief I rose, crossed the room, and, sitting
down on a pile of cushions in front of the fire, I looked
aimlessly into the leaping flames.

My years of wedded life, and such a life, had left
their mark upon me, and I greatly dreaded the hour
when my courage would forsake me, at last and for
good and all. Pride had hitherto come to my aid, but,
like metal slowly but deeply bitten into by a powerful
acid, that also, I feared, would soon give way and leave
me without strength to endure.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

The even ticking of the clock jarred on my nerves,
and the perfume of a basketful of strongly scent-
ed exotics on a table near by made me faint and ill.

*******

When I woke up from a troubled sleep some hours
later it was snowing heavily. Snow lay on all the
streets, and the broad river was freezing fast. There
was to be that night a gala representation at the grand
opera in honor of some foreign royalties, and, moreover,
it was the day of the bear-hunt.

I lay drowsily on my pillows, my eyes lingering with
a sense of pleasure on the objects which surrounded
me. My bedroom was of my own designing, and I
was very proud of it, for I considered it to be a great
success. The walls and ceiling were covered with a
heavy, dead white silken stuff, embroidered with gar-
lands of violets and heather; above the alabaster man-
tel-piece hung a large mirror framed by a ronde of cu-
pids holding up a drapery. The dressing-table, covered
with point-lace over pale violet velvet, was littered with
platinum-stoppered bottles and platinum-backed brushes
studded with amethysts. A thick white carpet covered
the floor, and huge white bear-skins were scattered
around. Upon one of them my faithful Ulmer dog lay
at full length in possession — monarch of all he sur-
veyed. On the tables and cabinets there was a pro-
fusion of flowers in iridescent vases and bowls, and
through the open doors of the room beyond a sweet
smell of violets was wafted in, proceeding from the
swimming-bath, which was always in readiness for me.
My maid moved noiselessly about, drawing back the
curtains, so that from my low bed I could catch
glimpses of the plants in the winter - garden. With-
out it was a dark, bleak winter's day, but within it
was as warm as summer, and mellow with soft color.

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I stretched my arms above my head and yawned
slightly.

"Johanna/' I said to my Abigail, "I do wish I was
not obliged to get up; there's something unpleasant
in the air to-day."

The woman looked up with a slightly surprised ex-
pression on her good-natured face. I knew she had
often wondered at the comparative patience with which
I bore my husband's neglect and cruelty. Therefore
she, who was devoted to me, hated him, and would
have heartily rejoiced in any misadventure that might
have befallen him.

Her glance made me smile, and, having partly recov-
ered my usual mental elasticity, I shook myself to-
gether and performed my toilet with unusual speed.

After donning a fur-lined shooting-suit I swallowed
a hasty breakfast and drove to the station where the
general rendezvous had been appointed by the Em-
peror's grand veneur to join the hunting-party.

Before noon we reached the thickly wooded, high hills
where many great brown bears, made ferocious by the
severity of the weather, had their lairs. The hunters
were scattered under the deep shadows of the pines,
cedars, and firs ; the day was still and intensely cold,
with no gleam of sunshine. A promise of more snow
lay hidden in the leaden-hued clouds, a true sports-
man's day, in fact. Followed at some distance by my
husband and by Count Paul, I advanced silently, wait-
ing and reserving my fire for any large beasts the Ya-
gers might start and drive towards us from the heights
above. We were speedily joined by the head hunts-
man, who whispered to Karl that he would post me at
the most favorable spot, and finally left me under the
dusky half-light made by the snow-covered boughs.

It was the beginning of the winter, just before the

325

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

bears commence to hibernate, and when, on the look-
out for a last good feed, they are especially eager for
their quarry.

Karl, Count Paul, and I paused at a place where four
narrow paths met, waiting and watching in absolute
silence.

We had been standing almost immovable for some
time, when down one of the dark drives, above which
the heavy branches met like a black canopy, there came
rolling and swinging towards us a huge, shaggy beast,
which probably would have gone by without scenting
us, as we were under the wind, had not Count Paul,
carried away by the irresistible impulse of all true
children of Ishmael, fired twice at it as it reached a
spot scarcely within gunshot.

Neither bullet had entered a vital part, and the ani-
mal, rendered frantic by pain, reared on its ungainly
hind-legs and advanced towards him, bent on serious
combat, as was testified by its great, grinning, foam-
ing fangs.

Instantly I fired, and this time the shot struck nearer
home, for, with a tremendous crash, the brute fell on
the snow, with blood pouring from its jaws and writh-
ing in agony.

With a singularly cruel light shining in his eyes,
and hunting - knife in hand, Count Paul ran towards
the prostrate animal.

"Take care!" yelled Karl. "It is dangerous to
touch a wounded bear/'

But Paul heeded not the words. He stooped to
plunge his broad blade into the bear's heart. At that
moment the dying brute gathered all its oozing strength
together, and, leaping upon him, dashed him to the
ground, mauling him terribly with tooth and claw. In
a second both Karl and I had sprung towards the strug-

326

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

gling mass formed by the hunter and the hunted, and
the bear received his coup de grdce. Then, with much
difficulty, we disengaged the young Count's tall form
from beneath the huge carcass of his dead enemy, and
laid him down gently upon some fallen pine-needles
which formed a kind of natural couch on the side of the
path. The wretched lad was deluged with blood, and
his face had assumed a grayish pallor which made him
look like a corpse.

"He is dead!" murmured Karl, shudderingly.

"Nonsense!" I retorted, hastily, and, leaning over
the wounded man, I quickly cut away his shooting-
jacket, his fur waistcoat, and soft silk shirt, stripping
him to the waist in order to judge how serious were
his injuries.

They were both numerous and severe, and I realized at
once that if we did not obtain assistance without delay
his chances of recovery were indeed slender. While I
was trying to stanch the blood as best I could with
my handkerchief and begging my husband to run for
help, Count Paul's eyes opened suddenly and fixed
themselves with a vacant stare upon mine.

I placed my hand upon his heart. Its beatings were
weak and irregular, and an intensely cold wind which
had arisen was turning his bare body to ice.

All was still around us, with that awful and impres-
sive stillness of the great woods. Karl had run off
swiftly for help, and nothing was in sight save the
gigantic dead bear, which lay on the blood-soaked snow.

If aid did not come in a few short moments, the la-
bored breathing would stop, and nothing could avert
the end. I shuddered and sank on one knee beside Paul.

Soon the wintry day would come to a close, leaving a
dusky, sultry gloom to brood over the loss of this strong
young life. I was overcome by a vague and sudden

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

awe, for the large, dark eyes of the dying man had
softened with a pity that did not seem to be caused
by his own terrible plight.

"Forgive — the share — which I have had — in your —
your unhappiness — " he gasped. The dark-red blood,
slowly welling out and staining the bluish snow, formed
a little pool where I knelt, in spite of the temporary dress-
ing which I had improvised by tearing Paul's shirt into
strips. My short fur coat, thrown over him to protect
him a little from the biting wind, was turned in places
to the same ghastly hue.

"Hush!" I murmured. "I know, and I forgive — for
your sin was chiefly one of heedless short-sightedness,
and without premeditation. I forgive you fully, all
that has already passed — all that may yet be to come. "

A wan smile of something like derision hovered about
his ashen lips. "Give me your hand/' he whispered.
"It is getting dark here — dark forever — " He gazed
upward and looked at the dim green boughs above us
with a wild, delirious, appealing pain, and the white,
drawn mouth moved in a gasping prayer. One last
breath shivered like a deep-drawn sigh through his en-
tire frame, a convulsive shudder shook the rigid limbs,
although life seemed still to flicker faintly, as though
loath to leave forever this handsome being in the
strength of his youth — and then he died.

When, a little later, the huntsmen who had been beat-
ing the woods above arrived upon the scene, led by
Karl, they found the Count stretched dead upon the
pine-needle-strewn snow. Standing erect before them,
though I was trembling from head to foot with cold and
emotion, I said, in a hoarse voice, which sounded to
me as if it were not my own :

"You have come too late to save him!"

I

CHAPTER XVIII

"Frisch auf, frisch auf mil raschem Flug!

Frei vor dir liegt die Welt;
Wie auch des Feindes List und Trug
Uns rings umgattert heltl"

TWO days later I met Fred at a dinner-party given
by Archduchess M. At eight o'clock I went up the
stairs of the archducal palace, thinking as I went that
really life was not worth living. I was sad and tired,
and still much shaken by the incidents attending Count
Paul's death. As I entered the anteroom and laid aside
my furs, the Flemish tapestries which hung over the
door leading to the inner apartments were pushed aside
and the Archduchess advanced to meet me. She was
clad in sweeping black laces, with a collar of rubies at
her throat, and her slender figure looked wonderfully
attractive under the brilliant light of the chandelier,
while a smile of genuine welcome displayed her daz-
zlingly white teeth.

"How good you are to come in spite of this fearful
weather/' she exclaimed, leading me into an adjoining
salon, and drawing me down on a low ottoman in front
of the blazing hearth. "Warm yourself, my dear;
you must be nearly frozen. Where is your husband?
Is he not coming?"

" I suppose he will be here soon," I answered, lightly.
" I have not seen him to-day."

At that moment my host came in somewhat precipi-
tately, and looked about him as if he feared to find the
room already full of people.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

"Always late, you incorrigible man'/' exclaimed
the Archduchess, playfully, shaking her finger at her
husband. He was about to reply when Nicky E.
was announced. The other guests soon arrived in
rapid succession. They were Archduke A., the
English ambassador, Prince G., Lord P., and, lastly,
my husband and Fred, who had met him at the
door.

The dinner was quiet and unpretentious, though the
cooking was remarkable. Our hosts were both gour-
mets, and the wines were perfect. A wealth of tea-
roses and lilies-of-the-valley, arranged in low Labrador
jardinieres, adorned the table, where egg-shell china,
mousseline glasses, and pyramids of superb fruit were
tastefully grouped.

I did not speak to Fred after the first words of greet-
ing, but several times our eyes met. Indeed, I said
little to anybody, and, as often my moods were very
silent, this attitude of mine attracted no remark. The
conversation began by a general complaint about the
continued severity of the temperature.

" If only we could get away before the beginning of
the Fasching," said the Archduchess; "there is noth-
ing I would enjoy more than to run down to Nice or
Cannes. How very nice it would be if we could make
up a party and all go there together for a fortnight or
so! Don't you think it is a good idea, and would you
not like it?" she added, turning to me.

"Very much indeed/' I said, quietly, and without
enthusiasm, " were it not that I am starting for Peters-
burg in a few days to spend a week there. Then I go on
to Brittany, where my mother has been royally pleased
to invite me/'

There was a general murmur of regret around the
table, every one being, or appearing to be, heartily

330

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

sorry to hear so lamentable a piece of news. Karl
coolly stared at me, and said :

"This is a sudden decision."

"Yes/' I replied, decisively, "it is; I only made up
my mind on the subject lately."

" I do not approve of your travelling alone with your
servants," continued Karl, perversely; "you had bet-
ter postpone this trip, or ask Fred, there, who I know
intends starting for Berlin soon, to accompany you at
least to the frontier."

" I am afraid that, however happy it would make me
to accept so tempting an offer," retorted Fred, "I will
be unable to do so, as I am called to England on im-
portant business."

"Fie! how ungallant you are!" laughed the Arch-
duchess, flashing a look from her bright eyes upon him.

"Not at all, Kaiserliche Hoheit ; please don't be so
uncharitable. My denial is my misfortune, not my
choice."

Karl smiled a curious, half-mocking smile, and the
subject was dropped for the time being, thanks to
Fred's presence d' esprit.

Dinner over, we sauntered into one of the prettiest
salons of the palace, called the Turkish room. Delight-
fully comfortable couches ran along three sides of this
charming buen-retiro, and on the walls hung some sin-
gularly fine specimens of Oriental arms. The Arch-
duchess, throwing herself on a pile of cushions, opened
a small cigarette-box and expressed a hope that every-
body would smoke there, instead of running away to
the smoking-room.

I lit a Russian cigarette and turned to speak to
Prince G., who was standing near me.

"Would it very greatly displease you," he whispered,
" if I were to express my admiration for your exquisite

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

symphony in yellow?" (I was wearing a lemon-hued
gauze gown, bordered with natural yellow jessamine
and some "canary" diamonds.)

" No ; I would merely thank you in the name of my
tailor/' I answered, with a smile. "I cannot accept a
compliment which he alone deserves."

" Now you are wrong for once, my dear ; all depends
on the way a toilette is worn. Many women spend
fortunes at the immortal Worth's, for instance, but
that does not prevent them from looking often more or
less like scarecrows."

" You are very severe. Some women cannot answer
for a want of taste probably inherent to their nature.
Worth, if he clothes them, is much more to blame in
this matter than they are. He is always a little outre,
and in my opinion his style best suits actresses and
other creatures of the same kind."

"Actresses and other creatures of the same kind!"
laughed the Prince. " That was well said ; it is what
I call an excellent definition as regards the Napoleon
de la couture. Truly, Muzzi, you possess considerable
ability for presenting our most cherished heroes' little
weaknesses to the public in a very brilliant but ex-
ceedingly uncharitable way."

"Never was such a compliment paid to my powers
of discrimination, although your criticism is a little
harsh in what regards the weakness and lowliness of my
spirit," I laughed, and was about to make a further re-
mark, when the Prince hastily rose, murmuring under
his breath : " Goodness, here comes your dear husband ;
excuse me, Muzzi, but to-night, somehow or other, he is
a trifle too much for me."

So funny was the expression of terror depicted on the
great statesman's face that I could hardly control my
features as I saw him literally scuttle away and seek

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

refuge behind a heavy table covered with books and
albums at the other end of the room. Karl, whose
spirits were evidently depressed, bore down upon me,
and took the place vacated by my old friend. He threw
one knee irritably over the other, leaned back on the
cushions of the divan, and said, shortly:

" Well, what new freak is this about going to Russia?
Were you discussing your projects with G.? I saw
him laughing and flirting to his heart's content, the old
sinner! He always pounces on the choicest morsel or
the best-looking woman, and in his idiotic and senile
way makes violent love to you."

"Nothing of the kind, I assure you/' I replied, much
amused. "The Prince knows too well what he owes
you to flirt with me."

" Tut, tut ! I am not quite so blind as you may think ;
indeed, my eyes are very wide open. That old coureur
is trying to pump state secrets out of you under cover
of his antiquated devotion. You need not think from
what I am saying, however, that I am jealous, for it is
not G.'s admiration I grudge you; no, indeed, only
please beware of him. You are singularly clever and
wide awake, and a power in political circles as well as in
others, but I want you to understand that I infinitely
dislike your turning your attentions to such matters."

" Really," I said, coldly ; " may I inquire to what I am
indebted for so flattering and sudden an interest on
your part?"

" Certainly you treat all I tell you with a silent con-
tempt which is very galling, but I have a right to ques-
tion you if I please. Why, then, do you confide in the
Prince, make such a fuss about him, and why, espe-
cially, are you going to Russia?"

"Your curiosity in the matter is very gratifying to
me," I interrupted, somewhat impatiently, for I could

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see now what Karl was driving at, and I was beginning
to be annoyed.

"Wait a minute; I'm not through/' continued my
irrepressible spouse. " Do you know what exasperates
me about you? You keep your own counsel too well,
and justify too completely your nickname of ' The
Icicle.'"

"Thank you so much; I take this as a great compli-
ment, do you know?" I said, laughingly, for my vexa-
tion was overruled by a keen sense of the unconscious
humor of this speech.

"Don't mention it. That doesn't mean that I may
not be brought round to a better understanding of your
extraordinarily complex nature if you will do me the
honor of explaining some things to me."

" You overwhelm me, indeed," I said, somewhat bitter-
ly. " Are you really dense to the point, my dear Karl,
to imagine that I am not thoroughly aware of your rea-
sons for desiring to prevent my trip to Petersburg ? You
object to my turning my attentions to political questions,
as you say, but I would annoy you less if my timely in-
terference in certain directions did not coincide with
the doings of a high and mighty lady — whom we will
forbear from mentioning by name — but who basks in
the light of your protection, and enjoys your help and
sympathy. My counter-mines have not the fortune
of your approval. C'est dommage. Pity, too, that I
should know so much, and that G., who has been
my friend, and, after a fashion, my mentor since I was
a child, should be the wonderfully keen-sighted man he
is, instead of the senile imbecile you are trying to make
him out to be."

Karl winced. This was a tender subject I had touched
upon, for the favorite of the moment had, I happened to
know, lofty ambitions, and was using my lord as a mere

334

I

I

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

cat's-paw, which was more than I cared to countenance.
His countless infidelities were of no importance to me,
but I was afraid to see him compromise himself, politi-
cally speaking, while in the hands of so dangerous an
intriguante. I considered rightly that the honor of his
name, which was mine as well, and the safety of his
country, which I loved as my own, must not be endan-
gered by this cold-blooded, designing woman and the
insanely vain, weak-minded man whom she fooled, so
I felt obliged to protect him in sheer self-defence from
his overwhelming suffisance and wholly silly infatuation.

" I am unable to comprehend your allusion/' he said,
wrathfully, biting his mustache and moving his ad-
mirably shod foot nervously. "You are very myste-
rious to-night. Perhaps your flirtation with handsome
Fred is making you melodramatic/'

" My good friend/' I replied, calmly, " I am afraid that
your dulness is becoming chronic. I will not stoop to
refute your delicate allusion to Fred, although it might
give me a chance of giving you some neat little hints,
not only about the eminently shrewd person who re-
mains nameless between you and me, but also about
Mademoiselle Be"cat, the delicious soubrette who serves
you as a screen to shelter the stainless virtue of that
very person. It is not my intention to interfere with
your — love affairs ; they are quite outside my province,
thanks be to a merciful Providence, but I am glad to
have the chance of warning you that you are just now
treading on very thin ice. There is a husband not far
from here who resents your — reverence for his wife,
and, singularly enough, he is in many respects so much
in sympathy with you that his jealousy extends to the
delicious soubrette above mentioned. Poachers are
liable to feel at times inclined to get rid of each other
when they meet on the same ground. Beware 1"

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

"You know a damned sight too much, madame.
Your spies are well informed, but so are mine, and I
repeat it, you love Fred I"

"Don't talk nonsense," I said, with a little laugh.
" Such weapons as you are trying to use are very point-
less and misdirected. I will end by thinking that you
are purposely aggressive. At any rate, let us drop the
subject for the present, for we are in danger of being
mistaken for a pair of genuine turtle-doves if we get
into the habit of secluding ourselves in corners like
lovers."

He swore under his breath ; but, without seemingly
noticing this breach of good manners, I rose and left
him to digest my oration as best he might. In my own
mind, however, I cursed the fatuous and perilous con-
ceit of the man whose wife I had the misfortune of being.
As to Fred, I made up my mind instantly to let him
know, without the possibility of a doubt, that his pres-
ence near me was causing comment. I dreaded to give
him pain, for he was easily hurt, and I never put in
question the depth of his affection, although he had
never said a word about it to me. Women possess a
fifth sense which makes it easy for them to detect such
things a long while before the man himself is aware
of his own feelings. Moreover, Fred's state of health
was extremely precarious. Years before he had been
consumptive, and although the lung trouble had dis-
appeared, yet his sojourns in the far East as a diplomat
had enfeebled his constitution, and he often looked
pathetically frail, in spite of his tall stature and usually
merry and cheerful mood.

Before taking leave of the Archduke and Archduchess
I asked him to lunch with me on the morrow, and to

drive afterwards to the Castle of S , which was at

that season deserted. There we could talk in peace while

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

walking in the immense park and grounds. He grate-
fully accepted, and I left him and Karl talking most
amicably together, apparently, having to go home to
change my dress for a ball at the Turkish Embassy,
where I had promised to put in an appearance.

At that very ball, by-the-bye, a peculiar incident
occurred. Shortly after my arrival in the salons of the
embassy, a tall and remarkably handsome Oriental
made his entrance into the so-called Throne -room.
Where had I seen this splendid specimen of manhood?
—those great, dark-blue eyes, fringed with abnormally
long lashes? that firmly chiselled chin? that beauti-
fully curved mouth, shaded by a long, silky mustache?

Suddenly I remembered my captor of the C Pass.

On the impulse of the moment I started to my feet, and, .
much to the amazement of all onlookers, I rushed up to
the hero of my adventure, and, extending both hands
to him, I exclaimed :

" How happy I am to see you again!"

His extremely puzzled expression urged me to add,
stupidly enough :

"Surely you cannot have forgotten me?"

"No, I have not/' said he, while a distinct blush
overspread his sunburned skin, " but you must remem-
ber, madame, that when I last saw you you were a
little soldier, while now — " His sentence remained
unfinished, much to my satisfaction. There was a
slightly awkward pause, and then, pointing to the
silken, pearl-embroidered belt which encircled his slim
waist, he showed me my two little jewelled revolvers.

" I have worn them ever since/' said he, softly.
*******

At two o'clock on the next afternoon Fred and I set
off for our proposed drive in my brougham. The weath-
er was fine, and we soon reached the imperial castle,
Y 337

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

which was completely deserted at this time of the year,
as I have said already. There was not a cloud to veil
the brightness of the sun, the broad beams of which
slanted among the massive trunks of the leafless trees
and fell like arrows of gold on the frozen turf. We
walked silently through the park, where the ice-bound
lake gleamed beautifully. We had hardly spoken a
word during the drive, and our lunch had been both
hurried and silent. Even now it seemed as if we were
both afraid to break a spell by talking. We bent our
steps towards a knoll where some deer stood looking
at us from a distance, and stopped to admire the beau-
tiful, shy creatures. And then our eyes met! Fred
bent his tall figure towards me, and, taking my hand,
pressed it to his lips. His self-possession was evi-
dently forsaking him, and he looked as if the snow-
covered ground and the sunny blue sky above were
whirling around him

"My friend," I said, gently, "this is dangerous play.
You must go away before it is too late/' I paused 1
It was very hard for me to say what I knew I must tell
him, and we stood for a moment in an uncomfortable
silence.

" It is too late already, at least for me," he murmured
at last, sadly, turning his head away.

Tears welled up in my eyes, and I stretched out both
hands towards him with a gesture of entreaty.

" Will you promise me one thing?" I said, very softly.

"I promise you all things. What is this one?"

I looked unflinchingly at him with what courage I
could muster.

" You love me. You need not say so — I know it. I
am — you have certainly guessed it — occupying a dif-
ficult and a sometimes singularly painful position.
Promise me, therefore, that you will not add to its dif-

338

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

ficulties, and that you will go away, at least for a while,
until the sky is clearer."

Twice his lips opened to speak without any sound
coming from them. At last he said, brokenly, and
with touching obedience and tenderness :

" My dearest and best, I will do as you wish. I will
be what you would have me be — a friend, and a friend
only, faithful until death, and devoted in all things to
you and you alone whether I be far or near. But re-
member that if you need me I will come at your bidding,
from wherever I may be."

I looked up at him through a mist of unshed tears,
and said :

"Thank you; I know that I can trust you. It is
safer and better for you to go now. I do not wish the
breath of scandal to touch either you or me, or to furnish
society with fuel for its ceaseless desire to condemn in-
nocents. I am very, very fond of you, my dear boy, and
it hurts me to send you away, and especially to give
you pain; but you do understand, do you not, the mo-
tive which urges me to do so?"

" I do, I do ; but it is hard, indeed, to see you leading
this miserable life. How can I ever endure your pain?
What need, what use is there for this sacrifice? You
know that I shall keep my word to you, that I shall obey
you in all things, but why should you not try to alleviate
the miseries of your present position? My whole exist-
ence is yours, to use or throw away as you choose.
But do not, for Heaven's sake, allow yourself to be in-
sulted, to be trampled upon, as you do. Your marriage
was an error, a cruel mistake. You are throwing away
your every chance of happiness in this world for the
sake of a guilty, thankless man, who finds his only
pleasure in shame and in sin. Will you never insist
upon your rights?"

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

" I know that I have every right to leave my husband
if I cared to do so/' I said, impatiently. "But I can-
not countenance the scandal and shame of it all, not so
much for my own sake, but for the sake of the name I
once bore, and also for the sake of the one I bear now.
Do not offend me by asking me to do what for years
I have been eager to avoid. On the contrary, encour-
age me if you can to patience and to endurance, for
thus you will serve me best. "

He saw probably the conflict that was going on within
me, and, taking my hand once more in his own, he ex-
claimed :

"Hear me, Muzzi. Had I seen you living a serene,
though a loveless, life, I would never have spoken to
you of my adoration for you ; but I saw you outraged,
injured, forsaken for rivals who are so base that to talk
of them before you is to degrade you. Can you ask me
to look on patiently, to remain mute? Remember how
I love you, and think of my despair/'

While he spoke we had been pacing up and down
under the trees in the bright sunset glow. We had
nearly reached the gates of the palace, where my horses
were waiting. I stopped short, and, turning my face
towards him, I said, resolutely :

"Listen, Fred. Once and for all, I tell you that I
will not become the talk of Europe. I hate to pain you
as I know that I am now doing, but although I am ready
to put your happiness before my own in every other re-
spect, I cannot tamper with what I consider to be the
only honorable course I can adopt. What I am going to
tell you may seem dictated by pride, if not by conceit
and self-complacency, but, were I an ordinary woman,
my brilliant life as a leader of fashion and a petted per-
sonage at court would be fully sufficient to satisfy me;
were I less rigid in my ideas, in spite of my perpetual and

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

misleading banter, I would doubtless have allowed my-
self to be entangled long ere this in some affaire de coeur,
if only to fill up the void of my life. But I am not built
that way; and, although I often turn in revolt against
the injustice which I must confess has been done me,
I will never swerve from the path I have laid out for my-
self, and I will pursue it, weary, alone, and unaided,
without even so much as allowing myself to think of
what might have been, were I made on different lines. I
owe this to the memory of my father, and to my love,
gratitude, and tenderness towards the Empress/'

"My dear, my dear," he murmured, "I know that
you are right, but how can I live out my life without
you?"

" Am I then to accept this tenderness which you offer
me, am I to fall to the level of other women who seek
consolation in unlawful affections? No, a thousand
times no! Anything is better than that! My present
sufferings, at least, are not of my own making, and I feel
that disgrace in my own eyes is the one thing I could
never endure." I clasped my hands together until my
rings cut into the fleshy praying from the bottom of my
heart for strength to persuade, convince, and comfort
this poor boy, whose ashen face and mournful eyes
were to me a sort of unbearable reproach.

He noticed my agitation, and in a simple, manly way,
which went to my heart, he drew my arm through his,
and, resolutely walking towards the carriage, said, in a
voice which trembled with emotion :

"God send that I am never again tempted to bring
sorrow into your already overburdened life. Forgive
me, dearest, for having spoken as I have done. The
future is in better hands than mine, fortunately. Let
matters stand as they are now for the present. I cannot
help loving you as long as my life endures, but I can

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

help giving you additional anxiety and worry. I did
not intend to leave you, although last night I pretended
to have been recalled home with a view of stopping
your husband's further teasing, but in two days from
now I will go, and stay away, too, until you call me
back. I am yours forever; of that rest assured/'

I nodded. To save my life I could not have uttered a
word, and I was glad that my servants and carriage
were by this time near enough to make it impossible
for me to answer.

That night there was a gala representation at the
opera, and, nolens volens, I had to be present. When I
entered my box at nine o'clock the house was hushed,
the music thrilled through the stillness, and on the
stage stood Faust and Marguerite. I sat down in my
accustomed seat, and, leaning my cheek upon my hand,
I fell into a fit of melancholy musing. I was very tired
and sad, my temples throbbed, and my head swam.
The dazzling light, the brilliant scene, had no charm
for me. Near me was my husband in his brilliant, gold-
laced uniform, but I was hardly conscious of his presence.

Many men entered my box, between the acts, but
somehow I seemed to have lost all my usual elasticity,
and conversation was an effort. Fred bowed low to me
from his place in the box of the British ambassadress,
but did not come near me.

The violins wailed softly, the atmosphere was scented
with hot-house blooms, and the loveliest women in the
world sat in their loges, displaying their beauty and their
jewels. The glittering uniforms and the gorgeous cos-
tumes of the magnates made a blaze of color and mag-
nificence not easily forgotten. But I was heedless of it
all. I only thought as I watched Karl, with the light
falling upon his sullen, dissatisfied face, of all the peace
which might have been mine had he only been like Fred.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

I forced such thoughts back fiercely and pulled myself
together. It was, I thought, high time to cease bemoan-
ing my lot, for I have always detested plaintive people.
To shoulder one's burden, whether it be light or heavy,
is the only thing for the brave to do, and I was sincerely
ashamed of my momentary weakness.

" You have heard the beat of the off-shore wind

And the thresh of the deep-sea rain,
You have heard the song — how long, how long? —
Pull out on the trail again."

That is the size of it ! " Pull out on the trail again "
— and pull well!

I left the opera as soon as I could and drove straight
home, for I wanted a little time in which to shoulder this
increased burden of mine anew.

Karl, when handing me into my carriage, excused
himself, with his customary courtliness when we were
on parade, from accompanying me, as he had, so he
said, an important appointment at one of his numerous
clubs. I smiled, for I knew only too well what those
pressing appointments meant.

I awoke next morning from a troubled and restless
sleep with a bad headache. The sun had hardly risen,
but I felt that a sharp gallop in the first crisp cold of the
rising day would do me good, and half an hour later I
was off and away, breathing in deep draughts the icy
air, clear as crystal and invigorating beyond compare.

My horse, a thoroughbred of exceptional beauty of
form, was mettlesome enough to occupy my entire at-
tention, a welcome circumstance, and it was only when
I got him beyond the central allee of the park and upon
the turf that I had leisure to look about me. White frost
was turning every blade of grass into a prismatic brill-
iancy exquisite to behold, and overhead the sky was of

343

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

a luminous blue, glazed with the gold and rose of sun-
rise, which dazzled and fascinated the eye. My spirits
rose, and soon I even caught myself humming snatches
of an old popular Breton Gwerz, which I used to sing
when I was still light-hearted Pierrot.

" Et ar mevel emez ann ti,

Vit gout petra z oa gand ar c'hi,

Talc he Kement da random 1"

(The slave has left the house to find out wherefore the
dog continuously made a row), I muttered. The harsh
syllables rolled off my tongue mechanically, and then I
laughed outright, for my own slave, who took the form
of a severely accoutred English groom, as dignified
and correct as a diplomat, was precisely engaged in
discovering what my dear old dog Czar, the pride of
my soul, was barking at so furiously in a dense thicket.
The turmoil turned out to be caused by Czar's dis-
covery of a large-sized hedgehog benumbed by the cold,
whose mysterious and dangerously cuirassed person-
ality exasperated the gigantic silver-coated Dane. At
last the magnificent creature was persuaded to relin-
quish his awkward prey, and came bounding towards
me joyfully, although a curious uncertainty in the faith-
ful eyes seemed to denote anxiety concerning the fash-
ion in which I would take his escapade. Dear, majestic
Czar, an imperial dog, indeed, and an imperial gift,
presented to me when yet quite a puppy by his august
namesake, the Emperor of All the Russias, and who
was my constant companion day and night, a loyal,
strong, reliable comrade, upon whom I could always
depend, come what may. I have always owned dogs,
good and handsome, also faithful and true, but none
did I ever possess who could in anyway bear compari-
son to that one!

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

When I reached home I was feeling almost entirely
myself again, and as I ascended the steps leading to
the main hall I turned to call out to my groom that I
would want the four bays put in the phaeton at eleven.
To be out-of-doors seemed to be the most potent remedy
for my troubles, and a double dose of this agreeable
tonic appeared none too much to help settle my nerves.
Just as I was about to walk up-stairs, Karl's aide-de-
camp came running down, and, at the sight of me, stood
stock-still, pale to the lips and trembling from head to
foot.

With instantaneous and almost supernatural pene-
tration I divined what had happened t when his eyes
met mine.

"What is it?" I whispered, grasping his gold-laced
sleeve. " Has Karl been wounded?"

The young man hesitated. His lips were as white as
his face. He answered hoarsely, almost unintelligibly :

"There was a quarrel at the club last night — they
fought this morning — he is — dying."

"Here?" I queried, horror-stricken.

He nodded, and pointed to the upper hall, where the
steps of several men were distinctly audible. "The
doctors!" he said, shuddering.

I waited for no more, but swiftly ran to my husband's
apartments. On the broad, low bed lay Karl, surround-
ed by several physicians, who made way for me at once.

The sword of his adversary had entered his left side
and passed out through the lung beneath the shoulder-
blade. One look sufficed to show me that he was as
good as dead already. Indeed, it seemed almost incred-
ible that they should have been able to transport him
to his home.

"Send for a priest," I said, quickly, to the young
aide-de-camp, who had followed me and was still trem-

345

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

bling like an aspen-leaf. Then I knelt on the floor and
took Karl's nerveless hand in mine.

For one moment he opened his eyes, and his lips
moved.

"You will forgive/' he muttered. "Too late; it is
too late, too late!" he repeated, breathlessly, with a sort
of shuddering, choking sigh, and with that sigh his
soul passed away to meet its Maker.

What did I feel at that supreme moment? I could
not myself have told, so conflicting were my emotions.
Fortunately the dumb Breton obstinacy of my race
made it possible for me to appear outwardly calm and
to retain my self-control, so that none of those present
were able to know whether I was broken-hearted or
totally indifferent. All the world knew that he had
died for the sake of another woman and under peculiar-
ly unsavory circumstances, but good taste and good
breeding forbade me to let it be known that I was aware
of this.

Immediately after the pompous and gorgeous funeral
I withdrew to an old castle in the mountains, which
was my own property, having been left to me by my
godfather two years before. There I remained alone
with my household and my own thoughts, refusing to
see anybody.

CHAPTER XIX

" The storm is stilled, the ocean's face

Is smooth to see, and calm once morej
The rising moon's bright rosy beam
Its placid surface glideth o'er.

" The minstrel's fresh green laurel wreath

Floats on the water buoyantly,
The regal circlet of the queen
Lies at the bottom of the sea!"

MY mother kindly suggested that I should come to
Brittany, or else let her join me in my mountain fastness.
It would, so she argued, look more seemly were she to
do so. I respectfully pointed out to her that I did not
care a jot about what looked seemly, and that I need-
ed a little time to pull myself together in solitude. I
did not add that the absolute freedom from a union
which I had loathed was not to be tampered with just
then. Nobody save the Empress had ever heard a word
of complaint from me during the five years of my mar-
ried life, and I was far from inclined to indulge in post-
mortem revelations about a man who could offend no
more. It was impossible for any one to discover wheth-
er I was relieved or sorry, for there were none there to
watch me, Heaven be praised ! I never uttered a sylla-
ble nor wrote a word which could enlighten my friends,
or even my attendants, as to the state of my feelings.
The only person who sent me no message of condolence
throughout the length and breadth of Europe was Fred,
and I understood his silence, which was in keeping
with the loyalty and truthfulness of his whole attitude.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Why should he condole with me? Why, indeed? And
how could he communicate with me without doing so?
His was the quintessence of eloquent silence, indeed,
and I appreciated it.

This wonderful peace, so soothing and so complete,
was not destined, however, to last. I could not forever
seclude myself from the world, and after three long,
blissful months of contemplative existence I left my
poetical retreat, much to my regret, called away by a
passing indisposition of my mother, which she pur-
posely magnified with a view of forcing me out of my
voluntary imprisonment.

I started off at noon and travelled straight to Paris.
I had gloomy forebodings, and felt for some reason or
other intensely miserable. It was late when I reached
the railway station. The express was on the point of
departure, and I hurriedly boarded my special car.
Then I stood motionless, looking out upon the little
woodland terminus. Soon the train rushed out of the
station through the heavy, gray darkness; the lamp
swinging above me shone upon my face, on which I
knew well that there must surely be a piteous expres-
sion of sorrow. Suddenly I threw myself on my knees
beside the cloth-covered seat of the compartment, and,
burying my head in the cushions, I sobbed convulsively
for a few moments. There was no sound but that
caused by the oscillating of the train swinging at head-
long speed over its iron sleepers. The weather was
cold. I rose feeling better for those tears — an unusual
luxury with me — and, wrapping my cloak around me, I
sat motionless, thinking of the past and of the future
very mournfully.

Every time when the train stopped, my courier and
confidential servant, Ferdinand, came to inquire if I
wanted anything, and the solicitude of this old soldier,

348

' M1LADI

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

whom I could trust blindly, was very welcome. Fer-
dinand was intensely devoted to me, in whose service
lie had been ever since my marriage. Many were the
little kindnesses I had been able to show him, and,
strange to state, he was not ungrateful. He often said
himself that there was nothing that he would not do
for my sake. He was then a man of forty-five, who,
with his smooth-shaved countenance and singularly
refined manner, had nothing smacking of the flunkey
about him.

I remained but a short time in Paris, the brilliant
city which has long since become distasteful to people
like myself who are monarchial to the backbone.
Princess Pauline M. had asked me to spend a few

weeks at her delightful castle of P en petit comit$,

and I gratefully accepted the invitation. Life at P

was charming. Everybody enjoyed perfect freedom,
for neither the Prince nor the Princess considered it a
duty to bore themselves and their guests by forcing
upon them a prearranged succession of so-called amuse-
ments in a regular line of order. The only cast-iron
rule was the demand made upon all guests to appear
at meal-times with truly military punctuality. An
early breakfast, consisting of fragrant chocolate and
toast, was generally sent to one's bedside, but at the
eleven-o'clock dejetiner h la fourchette everybody was
expected to be present, and the dinner at eight found
us all assembled under the hand-coffered and gorgeous-
ly painted ceiling of the banqueting-hall.

Princess Pauline, when in the country, rose with the
lark. She was one of those women who could dance
all night and then stroll out into the garden to watch
the awakening of day as though she had retired at eight
on the previous evening. She used to tell us that she
delighted in these early rambles, for, as she put it, in her

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

quaint manner of speech, "Nature looks as if God
washed it clean every morning, and at noon it is already
quite crumpled-up by contact with humanity/' Be-
neath her apparent insouciance there was a great deal
of feeling and even of poetical instinct in the Princess's
composition; and, although this may appear paradoxi-
cal on her part, I have heard this mondaine a entrance
bitterly complain of the conventionality of society,
and regret her being forced to endure a life made up
of everlasting spectacles, excitements, and revelry, in-
stead of being allowed to " plant her cabbages in peace."
The "cabbages" of the Princess, I may add, were an
unparalleled collection of orchids, for which she en-
tertained an inordinate passion.

In spite of all that may have been said to the contrary,
the Prince and Princess lived together on excellent
terms. When he married his wife — whose hare-brained
follies had been the talk of all Europe since she reached
her teens — Prince Richard knew that he was not taking
to himself a lackadaisical maiden who would " sit and
spin the silken threads of matrimonial love forever/' or
whom marriage would turn into an easy-going Haus-
frau. With praiseworthy tact the husband made every
allowance for his consort's somewhat trying supera-
bundance of vitality. She has been accused of many
peculiar eccentricities, but "one lends to the rich," and
in her case there has been much more smoke than fire.
Anyhow, the world liked her none the less for all that,
and, moreover, grande dame to the tips of her almond-
shaped finger-nails as she was, she managed to render
acceptable deeds and words which from any other woman
would have seemed reprehensible, as mere peccadilloes.
I never met any one else who possessed in so eminent
a degree what the French call du charme et de la seduc-
tion. Always in a good humor, her voice shrill and

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

sweet like a silver whistle, her large black eyes spark-
ling with mirth and malice, there was about her a con-
tagion of wit and cheerfulness which no one could
resist.

On one subject more than on any other did the prince-
ly manage agree, and that was in so far as the improve-
ment of the peasants living on their estates was con-
cerned. They founded schools for children, unlike any
other institutions of the kind, in which only the ru-
diments of education were imparted to the little ones.
Very autocratic, and an aristocrat to the core, Pauline
asserted that elaborate education of the lower classes
begot a multitude of theorists, and was the root of nihil-
ism, anarchy, socialism, and revolution.

A consummate musician, Prince Richard spent long
hours at the piano, playing with a perfection of skill
only equalled by the exquisite tenderness of his inter-
pretation. I have heard Liszt many a time summoning
the spirit of music to his masterly call in the concert-
room of P and elsewhere, but even this grand and

inimitable artist often declared that none could suc-
ceed in touching one's sense of harmony as did the
Prince when he dreamily wandered over the keys of his
perfect Pleyel, touching them lightly and softly while
evoking memories of every land and epoch in a quaint
succession of Magyar czdrdas, German reveries, French
berceuses, Spanish fandangos, voluptuous Viennese
waltzes, and weird songs from the Ukraine.

Every year during the hunting season, royal and

imperial guests assembled at P , and the whole place

became filled with animated and brilliant life. Great
hunting-parties made the country ring for miles around
with the sound of horn and rifle ; the bijou theatre echoed
every night with the laughter aroused by the perform-
ances of Princess Pauline, one of the most peerless

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

actresses in the amateur world, and the ballroom was
the scene of superb cotillions.

Passionately fond of all kinds of sports, the Prince
and Princess shot, rode, swam, and even played billiards
together, like two good comrades who thoroughly en-
joyed each other's company. Although the abnormal
intellectual powers and numerous accomplishments of
his wife seemed sometimes to oppress the Prince with a
vague sense of inferiority, yet in his humble measure-
ment of himself he was ever ready to yield to what he
called her "superior comprehension of life." And thus
everything went as merrily as marriage bells with
them.

Their kindness to me during this, my last, visit to
them was intelligent, unobtrusive, complete. They
forbore from filling their house with many people, but
selected a few choice spirits, among whom was Prince
Alex S., the handsomest youth in our army, and who,
according to Pauline, was fated to become my second
husband.

I cannot conceal the fact that I was fond of Alex, and
I would have been blind indeed had I neglected to see
that this fondness was more than mutual. He was then
about twenty-five years old, with delicate, exquisitely
modelled features, great sapphire - blue eyes fringed
with long, curly lashes, a slight blond mustache, just
a couple of shades lighter than his wavy, short-cropped
hair, and an expression at once gentle and cold. His
height was great, and his bearing not only that of a
soldier, but of a typical grand seigneur. His life was
one of the most envied in Europe, for he possessed prac-
tically limitless wealth to uphold one of the oldest and
most glorious names in the universe.

We had been friends ever since my marriage, and I,
with my incorrigibly analytical mind, could perfectly

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

appraise his feelings. He was not in love with me; he
loved me I was not quite so sure, however, of what I
myself felt for him; admiration in a way, sympathy,
comradeship, and that fondness which I have mention-
ed just now, but which was quite untinged with any
tenderer sentiment. He was evidently the magnetized,
not the magnetizer. The ice of my temperament, which
dated from my wedding-day, was not of a kind to melt
under even the most volcanic of atmospheres. Love
to me was indeed an absolutely empty word, and I often
used to hum to myself the ironical lines which sound
so melodious and soft as they have been written :

"Dari mana datang linta?
Dari gounoung touroung di kali.
Dari mana datang tchinta?
Dari mata touroung di ati. . . ."

(Whence cometh the leech?
From the mountain it descends to the river.
Whence cometh love?
From the eyes it descends to the heart. . . .)

It had never descended to my heart, although my
eyes had certainly rested on many an attractive coun-
tenance, but I had until then invariably succeeded in
changing my admirers into the friends I wanted them
to be, and I certainly gave no thought to a second mar-
riage at present.

"You believe neither in love nor in sorrow/' Alex
said one day, abruptly, to me, h propos de rien.

"Why should you say so, Alex?" I replied, somewhat
nettled. " You know that I have reason to be aware of
the fact that sorrow exists."

"And what about love?" he continued.

" How stupid, how intensely stupid you are, my poor
boy! What do you mean by putting such ill-timed
questions to me?" I exclaimed, thoroughly provoked.
Z 353

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

" I mean this, Muzzi. You cannot make any pretence
of regretting Karl. I knew him, and I know you, so
I may make bold to state that all conventionality can
be laid aside even at this early hour between us. My
words are previous, that is true, but I love you too dear-
ly to run the chance of losing you, for I fear that there
is somebody else looming up on your horizon. I have
been wretchedly unhappy about you, my snow-flower ;
I thought that I had conquered my folly, but now the
gods have played into my hands, and I would be ten
times a fool to leave anything to chance. Will you
marry me, Muzzi, as soon as your official period of
mourning comes to an end?"

He spoke with animation. His cheeks were slightly
flushed. His eyes were full of light, and there was a
restrained masterfulness about him to which I was not
accustomed.

" Permit me to question your taste — which is invari-
ably so perfect — in speaking as you do," I said, coldly.
"Your tirade reminds me of the celebrated crumpled
rose-leaf. You are, my dear boy, crying for the moon,
like any other spoiled child, and trying to make me mis-
take you for a martyr, which you emphatically are
not. Domitian and the cabbage-garden all over again.
You are witty when you care to be so, but if you
are going to become elegiaque, it will not suit your
style."

" I regret, Muzzi, that you should ridicule me in this
way," he retorted, much annoyed. "Men, I think,
are more romantic than women. Your merciless little
laugh often haunts me, I assure you; it conceals so
much that I would give my life to read. I have been
dreaming of awakening you from the torpor in which
you have allowed your heart to fall. You belong to
the epoch which is known as le temps ou la Reine

354

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

Berthe filait, and yet you pretend to be as indifferent to
every human emotion as if you were made of stone."

"You are talking great nonsense, Alex," I replied;
" and as to awakening my heart, as you so graciously
put it — excusez du peu, man ami ! — it would take pity,
for instance, or some other such soul-stirring sensation,
to accomplish so dark a deed. Now, conscientiously, my
good fellow, are you an object for pity, or for sympathy
even, dites la verite?"

"Excess always carries its own retribution, Muzzi.
You are overdoing your part. I cannot understand
you, especially lately."

I walked through one of the doorways into the open
air, anxious to put an end to this conversation, which
by no means pleased me.

"Don't be sententious," I called back to him over
my shoulder. "C'est aga$ant ; give me time to think
your proposal over. Truly, your haste is indecent."

"That is a very shocking speech," he said, wrath-
fully, marching after me on to the greensward.

"Pray excuse me, Alex, dear; you are paved with
good intentions, but I cannot just now stay to hear you
explain them to me. The dinner-bell will ring in half
an hour, and, in spite of my 'crapy' condition, I can-
not appear before our hosts in the costume I wear
now."

His face grew cold. A deep displeasure darkened
his eyes. He drew back, and then stood stock-still,
watching me. Remorse immediately overcame me,
and swiftly I turned and came close to him.

"My dear old chap," I said, repentantly; "do not
take my words amiss. I am awfully fond of you, dear,
but you know that I cannot make up my mind about
so grave a question on the spur of the moment. We
have always been such friends, please do not disturb

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

what exists that is really beautiful between us by your
rashness."

"But I love you, Muzzi," he pleaded, softened, and
looking very boyish and earnest.

"Of course you do, you goose! Where is the harm?
I am not scolding you for that, am I? But do not be
melodramatic : it is so absurd and so tiresome/'

"All right," he said, with an effort. "I'll wait, dear
girl. But still I wish you would give me your word; I
know that you will keep it."

I shrugged my shoulders and fairly ran across the
lawn to the conservatories, where I gathered some gar-
denias, intending to fasten them in my dinner-dress of
black gauze.

That very night, as we sat in the music-room listen-
ing to some of Prince Richard's exquisite melodies, a
letter brought by special messenger was handed to me.
It was from Fred — a long, rambling, rather involved
epistle, incomprehensible, indeed, excepting to the in-
itiated. I read between the lines and found out that he
had been very ill, that he was lonely, wretched, misera-
ble! Some blundering ass of a doctor — I beg his hon-
orable pardon, for he was, indeed, a great and celebrated
specialist — had bluntly told him that he could not live
six months, and the poor fellow had, this being given,
refrained from uttering a single word of love or tender-
ness, although his feelings oozed through every sen-
tence of his curious epistolary effusion. My eyes grew
moist as I read this unconscious appeal, and Alex, who
was sitting within a couple of feet of me, bent suddenly
forward and asked, irritably :

"What is the matter now, Muzzi? Any bad news?
You are as pale as a ghost. Who has been bothering
you?"

"Nobody, my dear," I replied, with some impatience.

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

" If you are so curious, I may tell you that this letter is
merely from a friend of mine who is seriously ill."

"Oh, indeed!" he exclaimed. "A very dear friend,
then, I presume?"

" Very," I said, shortly, nettled by his tone, and, rising
from my chair, I swept out of the room. Jealousy is a
feeling I despise. It lowers the object thereof as much
as the person who inflicts it, and I never could tolerate
it. Alex was, therefore, in disgrace, and I seized the
first possible opportunity to bring my visit to a close,
leaving him apparently very disconsolate, but deserved-
ly so, in my humble opinion.

Upon my arrival in town I was requested by the Em-
press to precede her to the south of France, where she
intended to spend a few weeks. While there I met Fred,
lounging under the palm-trees, gazing with evidently
incurable melancholy upon the thickets of high rose-
laurel, the hedges of cactus and aloes, and the oily blue
waves which are the greatest characteristic of this re-
gion, de I'eternel printemps.

He did not look, when we so unexpectedly met, as if
"granted wishes were self-sown curses." His thin face
lighted up extraordinarily, and he was so visibly en-
raptured that I felt deeply touched.

Admirable feminine logic! Enviable faculty of car-
ing for persons in proportion to the need they have of
one!

I do not know whether other women are like myself
in this respect ; the man who begs you to lean upon his
strength and to take shelter under the almighty wings
of his protection has never appealed to me! My life
has been one long resistance to the insufferable conceit
of the "stronger sex" with all its attending parapher-
nalia of superiority, and yet I hate a " new woman " —
more than that, I despise those of my sisters who claim

357

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

equality with their mankind. This seems to be an in-
solvable puzzle and paradox, and an aphorism as well,
and so I must not linger over it. The tender, soft-
hearted male being, who is manly with everybody but
myself, is what I like and admire, because perchance a
man's weakness, his tears even, his clinging love, are
the subtlest of all flatteries when such feelings are dis-
played to me alone. Otherwise I would certainly call
them contemptible. Hercule filant aux pieds d'Om-
phale — that's the billet, evidently, but Omphale must
be myself, that goes without saying — on est ego'iste a
ses heures !

With the sea at our feet and the mountains at our
back, we spun out a very pretty idyl during those golden
days on the Cote d'Azur. He loved me. He was ill
and helpless and reliant upon me, poor, dear old boy, and
finally I promised to marry him. A quiet life for a little
while is very wholesome, but very impractical. I lost
sight of the fact that a tremendous commotion would
be created by such a decision on my part. I did not
realize that, when once wre are of the world worldly, wTe
cannot easily get rid of the world and of its bitterly un-
charitable way of judging situations. I was serenely
indifferent. Once I had married to please my mother,
and once was enough, I fancied. That is just what I
thought. Of late years I had always done what I chose,
I had always been obeyed when I spoke, why should I
not persevere?

I began to think seriously that the thing was feasible.
The difference of race, of nationality, of religion, and
others, were, I knew, tallish obstacles, but I relied on
my influence and on my Breton stubbornness to get over
them with flying colors. Alas! poor colors, how often
they were made to dip before the storm !

There is something of the savage in all of us; at

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

tunes we get tired of the trumi>ery and folly of the world,
and we deem it pleasant to lose it, for we are then espe-
cially conscious of its shallowness, of its sheer imbecili-
ties, its cruelties, and its insincerity. I hate notoriety of
all kinds, for it hurts my pride, and I look upon it with
ineffable contempt and disdain, but notoriety is one of
the finest products of our civilization, carried to a fine
point, indeed, and is enviable to many. As Fred's wife
I could once and for all " plant my cabbages in peace " —
as Pauline would have said — of that I felt certain, which
shows that one must never be sure of anything.

"Les d61icats sont malheureux;
Rien ne saurait les satisfaire."

Festina-lente, Pazienza I The world can take its re-
venge, and does so, as a rule, pretty thoroughly upon
those who at heart despise it, and who dare to show that
they do. Ah! even now, I, who pride myself, unduly
perhaps, on being somewhat of a stoic philosopher,
turn pale and shiver with a vague and intangible terror
when I think of all the misery we went through. Fort-
unately my will was iron to endure, therefore I trained
myself to give no sign of distress, to show no inclination
of yielding after the fight had begun, and the poor world,
great spy though it be, how surety, how universally it
can be chicaned! If the hidden canker ate in the heart
of the rose, none were the wiser, nor dreamed that so
many repeated blows had been felt through a well-
tempered armor. Forced to watch the slow approaches
of the pitiless flame, the prisoner chained to the stake
finds joy in disregarding outwardly this gradual on-
ward creeping, for to fool the world is a legitimate and
delicious pastime when one's conscience is at rest and
reproaches one nothing.

The first intimation of my resolve was met by a veri-

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

table hurricane of violent protest. Everybody made it
his or her business to interfere, to entreat, to command,
to intrigue, to attempt force even — which was the worst
and most dangerous step which might have been taken,
for it anchored me more firmly in my decision.

Morning, noon, and night, early and late, at all pos-
sible times and moments, I was attacked, implored,
and threatened by turns. Nor was Fred spared, for his
people were just as adverse to the whole thing as were
mine. A religious warfare was the cover for many
other causes of disagreement too long and too wearisome
to describe. Fred's father stood my friend through
it all. He was a trump, a bona-fide stand-by, and as
fine a gentleman as ever drew breath. Poor dear, he
went through his share of sorrow on our behalf, and we
brought into his life a sense of stormier emotion than we
cared to raise. He became passionately attached to me,
and I to him ; and every blow directed at me and which
struck him maddened me with rage.

Here again I pause before the inadequacy of words,
the impotency of such tools as pen and ink, to evoke be-
fore the mind of a reader the bitter-sweetness or sweet-
bitterness of situations one has lived through, but is
powerless to recount. The beautiful loyalty and stead-
fastness of Fred, the risks we ran, the dangers we mar-
vellously escaped, the anguish we often felt, all these
terrible sensations belong to the vast number of inde-
scribable things. Fiction treats such chapters in a
hero's or a heroine's life much better and much more ably
than truth, for truth clips the wings of the would-be
writer, and with a weary sigh the poor, troubled scribe
allows a sense of the impossibility of such a task to
weigh down pinions fluttering with a desire to soar.
Et votid, comme on ecrit I'histoire. Great sorrows, great
sacrifices, great loves, great joys are best left to the

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

imagination. So are great hatreds, for dissection suits
them ill, and yet —

" Je suis si bien guerie de cette maladie,

Que j'en doute parfois lorsque j'y veux songer;
Et quand je pense aux lieux ou j'ai risqu6 ma vie,

J'y crois voir £ ma place un visage Stranger !
Muse, sois done sans crainte, au souffle qui t'inspire,

Nous pouvons sans p6ril tous deux nous confier
II est doux de pleurer, il est doux de sourire

Au souvenir des maux qu'on pourrait oublier."

CHAPTER XX AND LAST

"I landed on the shore, my sails I furled,
A dreadful tempest bravely I withstood;
Past Scylla and Charybdis dangers dread —
My brow did sweat.

"I yet have vineyards and far-reaching fields
Of golden grain, while love and liberty
Dwell in my house; and from my gracious God
Shall I ask more?"

UPON leaving the Cote d'Azur I went straight north
and reached my home on a Monday, followed by Fred
at two days' interval. At seven o'clock on the following
Saturday I drove to the railway station in order to take
the Paris express. It was not so cold as on the pre-
ceding days, although it was still snowing slightly,
but the dark sky and slushy streets looked dismal, and
deepened my depression. Notwithstanding the early
hour and the inclemency of the weather, several of
my intimate friends who had stuck to me through thick
and thin came to the station to bid me good-bye, and,
as my brougham stopped in front of the large terminus,
Fred ran down the steps and offered me his arm to lead
me towards my saloon carriage. It wanted but a few
minutes of the hour of departure, and they were fully
occupied by leave-takings and wishes for a speedy re-
turn.

I laughed and talked feverishly, shielding my eyes
with a bunch of violets I carried, for I dreaded that they
might tell their own tale. As I was about to enter the
train, I approached Fred and extended my hand to him ;

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

he raised it to his lips with a look of unutterable ten-
derness and said, in a low voice, " Que Dieu vous garde
et vous assiste."

I drew myself up, and there was a confident and
trustful smile on my lips as I looked him full in the
face. I felt that the corners of my mouth quivered a
little, but I did not reply, and, turning to my courier,
I gave him my instructions about our trip. I then
took my place, the little knot of friends said their last
God-speed, and the train began slowly to move upon
its way. Once more I fixed my eyes upon Fred's pale,
drawn face, with the same intention of cheering confi-
dence. As I sank back in my seat the express passed
out of the station, rolled on faster, and in a moment
had left the dear city I loved so well far behind.

The snow lay deep on the country. The train rushed
onward through pine forests, with their sombre masses
of fir and Siberian arolla looking dusky in the grayness
of the day. Everywhere there was frozen water, and
in the dim distance the snowy ranges of the mountains
were barely discernible through the mist.

For a long time I sat silently watching the blurred
landscape, thinking of Fred and of the mysterious future
I was going to enter upon for his sake. It was soothing
to feel that I was his only care, and it was with rising
hope that I gazed on the brightening panorama that
met my vision on every side.

The track ran between two forest roadways, over-
shadowed by grand old trees ; on the right a mighty
torrent rushed through heavy bowlders, white with
perpetual foam. Near the horizon there was the
gray sheen of glaciers, glittering behind the naked
branches of the denuded timber. Where any of it
had been cleared, wide tracts of frozen heather and of
broom stretched forth like patches of brown velvet, and

363

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

as the train went swiftly onward I noticed here and
there some abandoned woodman's hut, under the
drooping boughs of the pines. The solemn stillness
of winter had overtaken the little chattering mountain
streams and confined them in their icy beds, which
appeared now and again among the dead grasses
like fine traceries of silver.

The day wore on. When the sun began to sink behind
the mountains the whole landscape was for a moment
illuminated by a pink -and -golden light of exquisite
brilliancy. Far behind, where my starting-point lay, a
huge bank of black and threatening clouds had gather-
ed, but ahead of the rushing train there was a sky of
purest azure, in which the crescent of the new moon
was beginning to show its silver sickle.

"This is a good omen," I thought, gazing at the
strange contrast. "May my new life be as pure and
bright as the picture which stretches now in front of me.
Life cannot be unhappy for me with Fred," I said
to myself, half aloud. " Soon I shall be his wife, and
then all this struggle will be at an end."

Again I sat quite still, facing the grand amphitheatre
of ice and snow that flashed in the sunset and glowed
like molten gems. The wintry moon rose higher in the
heavens. The descending night threw its shadowy
veil over hill and dale, and in the far distance the lights
of a great city began to glimmer. There the express
stopped for half an hour, and then pursued its hurried
flight through the increasing darkness and cold. Nest-
ling in the soft furs of my couch, I dreamed the bright
dreams of youth, oblivious of coming evil.

Twenty-four hours later I arrived, with my attend-
ants, at the H6tel Continental. The noise, the move-
ment, the brilliantly lighted streets of Paris fatigued
and wearied me. I stood at the window and thought

364

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

again of Fred, who would in all probability reach the
French capital almost immediately.

At noon I drove to my mother's residence. I had
given no notice of my arrival, and was therefore not
expected. My Lady Mother was alone when I was
announced, and seemed very much astonished at my
sudden advent. I told her the whole truth, without
resorting to either subterfuge or reticence, and her anger
was terrible. In her mind, a marriage with Fred was a
hideous offence against all the rules of worldly wisdom
which she fondly imagined I had by now assimilated,
and she had not as yet taken my plans on the subject
into serious consideration.

"I wonder how you dare come to me, your mother,
with so absurd a proposal. All sense of the fitness of
things must be dead within you when you venture to
speak to me as you have just done. Has that man
bewitched you? Is he your lover?" she exclaimed,
wrathfully.

"You* know that what you say is untrue, mother.
Fred is not my lover, and you should think twice before
you use such words to me."

" I know nothing of the kind, and I believe you to be
capable of almost anything, after what you have had
the inconceivable effrontery to tell me."

" Should I have come to you if I had fallen so low?"

" Perhaps. You are clever enough to have planned
your visit to me in order to blind the eyes of society to
your escapade."

"You think very ill of me, mother."

" I do. And now listen. You must choose between
this man and me. If you persist in your resolution
I will banish you forever from my heart and home. Good
God! what can such a union do for you? Can it de-
stroy the past? Why lose all that is worth having?

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

What you have just told me is known only to us both,
to the Empress, and to one or two other persons. It
must remain so. The world need never find out your
error if you yourself do not become its informant by
acquainting it of your insane idea with regard to so un-
befitting a second marriage."

''Permit me to repeat that there has been no — error,
and never will be/' I interrupted, as gently as I could.

" I say that there is!" exclaimed my mother, violently.
"With me the intention goes for the fact. But let us
end this. Will you, or will you not, obey my commands ?
If you consent to write to-night to this wretched fellow,
telling him that in accordance with your mother's wishes
you will abandon all idea of marrying him, I will try
and forget what has passed. Should you refuse to
do so, I will consider myself entirely justified in clos-
ing my doors upon you. Speak now. What will you
do?"

"Mother," I exclaimed, "I entreat you to think well
before you act. Remember that my first marriage was
entirely and solely your work. I was a guileless and
innocent child, and knew not what I was doing. It is
not for you to turn against me now if I care to marry an
honest gentleman who loves and honors me. How can
I, at your bidding, break my promise to him who trusts
me, and all that for the sake of the world's opinion.
You do not know what I have suffered during all the
years of my wedded life with Karl, else you would not
be so pitiless. "

"Suffered! Why, you had, and still have, every-
thing a woman can wish for — rank, position, youth,
beauty, fortune; what more did you want?"

"Simply happiness, and a husband whom I could
love and esteem instead of a debauche who was both
cruel and faithless to me."

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

"If you were a Christian, you would know that a
wife must bear with her husband's faults and charita-
bly overlook his mistakes."

"Faults, mistakes!" I cried, bitterly. "Were you
to say crimes, you would be nearer the point. He prac-
tised vices so low that I would not defile myself by even
hinting at them. I implore you, mother, reconsider
what you have said. Let me come and live with you
till I have married Fred. Public opinion, which you
fear so much, will then be satisfied about my choice,
even if it be at first taken by surprise."

" Never!" she exclaimed, sternly. " Never will I con-
sent to sanction your folly. If you persist in your
purpose, you must do so on your own responsibility
and at your own risk. "

For a few seconds, which seemed hours to me, silence
reigned supreme between us.

" Is this your last word, mother?" I said, finally.

"It is. Choose now the path you want to follow/'
she answered, with a cruel sneer.

" My choice is made, then," I replied, hotly. " I can-
not change my mind for you, who love me so ill that you
are ready to sacrifice my life once more for the sake of
society and society's verdict. I will marry Fred — but
remember one thing, if there is scandal it will be your
doing, not mine. For with your help it might have
been avoided. You are committing an unpardonable
injustice. I have done no wrong, and I swear that I
will do nothing that even you could blame. One day
you will regret your harshness, but it will be too late. "

She rose from her seat and stood erect, one hand rest-
ing on the carved work of her high oak chair. She
looked cold, stately, and disdainful, with the sweeping
folds of her black velvet dress falling to her feet like a
queen's robes.

367

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

"You have made your choice. Now go!" she said,
mercilessly.

Under that last and intolerable insult I staggered,
then, mastering myself with a sudden effort, I bowed low,
and without a word, without a look, I left my mother's
presence, blindly groping my way along the stately
corridors, hardly knowing whither I went, and left her
house with a burning pain at my heart.

While this painful scene was going on at my mother's
residence, Fred had arrived in Paris and sat waiting in a
private salon at his hotel. The weary day dragged on
its course, and still he remained without news. When
night came on his anxiety grew unbearable, and when
at last I arrived he was looking ghastly. I advanced
towards him, throwing my furs from me as I moved, and
said, in a sort of lifeless way :

" It is I — I have no one left but you in this world. I
came to tell you this — and also that I kept my word
to you in full."

Fred's face became paler yet, and the tears stood in
his eyes.

"Muzzi, my poor little Muzzi/' he whispered. Then
he threw his arms about me and pillowed my head on his
breast, adding softly : " What has happened, my dear-
est, to hurt you like this? What new pain has been
laid upon you?"

"My mother has dismissed me from her house, like
the meanest of her attendants/ 'I answered, with a dry,
choking sob. Then, springing from the shelter of his
arms, I began to pace violently to and fro, my chest
rising and falling with my labored breathing. In a
few words I told him how I had been repulsed, how
shamefully my confidence had been derided.

" Oh, Fred," I said, wringing my hands, " you did
not know what you did or what you asked when

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THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

you first told me of your love. Terrible obstacles will
be thrown in our way ; you cannot realize all that will
be attempted when it is found out that my mother
disowns me. She has warned me that she will turn
my entire family against me, and if I claim my rights
now I will be simply laughed at and cast away."

"Don't talk so, my dearest/' interposed Fred, draw-
ing me once more towards him. "What would life
be to me without you? Do not be faint-hearted now;
you are my promised wife, the woman I would have
chosen from a thousand as the purest and best, the
noblest and bravest that ever lived. Let me see you
smile again, and hear you promise never to despair.
It is not like you to do so, and I cannot bear it."

I looked up at him with eyes in which tears were
still swimming.

" Forgive me, Fred," I said, much ashamed. " I have
been odiously weak, more so than I ever was before.
Have no fear ; I will never let you see tears again, what-
ever may happen. Now tell me what you want me to
do; it is for you to decide."

"God bless you, Muzzi," he murmured, "I will try
to justify the confidence you place in me. You must
leave Paris as soon as you have put your affairs in the
hands of able and intelligent lawyers. I think that
Italy will be the best spot for you to go to at present. I
will follow you there after a few days, for we must be
careful not to give the world food for gossip, and I will
live near you in order to be always within reach of your
call. We will then be married quietly and travel until
the whole thing is forgotten."

" All right," I exclaimed. " Us I'ont voulu, and let us
hope for the best. Should there be sorrows and dis-
appointments in store for us, let us be prepared to face
them courageously; I cannot imagine what made me
2 A 369

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

lose my sand like this. I am disgusted with myself; "
and so, indeed, I was.

We left the hotel and drove in my carriage to the Con-
tinental, where we arrived in a more cheerful frame of
mind than was to be expected of us under the circum-
stances. I was deeply moved by the tenderness which
poor Fred displayed. How could I ever do enough for
the dear lad who loved and trusted me so boundlessly,
and yet I felt my present awful predicament deeply.
I did not mind so much abandoning position, distinc-
tions, family ties, but I knew well that, however guilt-
less I might ever remain, slander would surely reach
me now, when it became known that I had left all to
wed him.

I certainly did not lack courage, but I abhorred scan-
dal of every kind, and I was very proud of the undim-
med glory of my name. Yet I felt capable of braving
calumny and slander — yes, capable of incurring false
censure if encountered in the path of justice and of what
I considered now as being my duty to Fred. This feel-
ing made sacrifice easy to me, and I felt certain that he
would always be worthy of my devotion and self-for-
getfulness; but still I fretted in spite of my resolutions.

During the few days I was forced to tarry in Paris,
while definitely arranging all my affairs, I had oc-
casion to notice that already the serpents of calumny
were at work. Many who had been my devoted friends
until then, although well aware of my presence, forbore
to call upon me. A few days before my departure for
Italy, as my carriage was bearing me through the Avenue
des Champs ElysSes, on the way from my lawyer's
house, I passed the equipage of the Russian ambassa-
dress, who for many years had been numbered among
my valued friends. Now the large, melting, black
eyes of the Muscovite great lady met mine with the

370

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

calm, cold stare of a stranger, and there was no recogni-
tion in their vacant gaze as she slowly drove on. This
direct cut smote me to the very soul, for it was the first
time in my career of perpetual social triumph that I had
been thus treated. A few minutes later Archduchess
S., who was staying in Paris at the time, passed me,
and the same blow was repeated, but in a much more
unmerciful fashion, for there was an insulting smile
on the thin lips of the acrid-minded Princess. I knew
that she was glad to be able at last to humiliate me —
as she thought. I did not allow a single flash of anger
from my eyes to betray my feelings ; I negligently lean-
ed back on the cushions of my victoria and smiled, a
slow, amused smile. As soon, however, as her carriage
had disappeared from view, I ordered my coachman
to drive home as fast as possible.

Perchance her joy would have been more complete
could she have known what a tempest she had raised
in my heart. When I reached the hotel I shut myself
in my rooms, anxious only to be alone, and to hide from
all eyes the ungovernable rage which made me tremble
from head to foot.

For the first time I had tasted the ashes of humiliation,
and I felt the experience bitterly.

I sat motionless, with my back turned to the light of
the windows, my hands clenched, my teeth set tight,
struggling with the throes of abdication. I had worn
my diadem long and proudly, and, in spite of all avail-
able pluck, I suffered terribly. I felt that I, who for
years had been the pampered darling of the great world,
had just been treated as if I had, after a fashion, lost
caste.

Unfortunately for me, my mother and her family at
once took sides squarely against me, and I had to fight
my battle alone and unsupported. Not one of my former

371

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

friends, except the Empress and Rudi, whom I entreated
not to move in the matter, stood by me in this hour of
need, and, of course, Fred could not take up the cudgels
on my behalf without compromising me, a thing I dread-
ed beyond everything else.

The anxiety and pain which I endured were neverthe-
less telling severely upon me, and I very unwillingly
lingered in Paris, kept there by important business. I
longed for the calm and tranquillity of the country, and
also for the end of this long and wearisome period of
tantalizing misery which was becoming unendurable.

One morning, as I was sitting alone looking over some
important papers which had been sent me to sign, Fred
entered the room. He looked pale and tired, and I saw
at a glance that something had gone wrong. But I
refrained from questioning him and greeted him as
unconcernedly as if I had noticed nothing.

"Have you heard lately from the 'Great Powers"*"
said he, throwing himself on an ottoman near the win-
dow. "I am very anxious about all this/'

"Yes, I had a letter this morning, but what is the
good of worrying? We cannot hurry matters, and so
we must try to bear the delay patiently. "

Fred sighed wearily, and leaned his head upon his
hand. His face grew paler still, and his lips quivered
slightly.

"We must try to bear the delay patiently, must we?
You do not seem to realize how miserable this very de-
lay makes me, Muzzi."

I passed my hand over his forehead with a soothing
gesture, but said nothing.

" Look here/' he continued, " I would not have spoken
thus had it been possible to keep still, but I have heard
to-day that your mother and others have used their
influence with the French government to such good

372

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

purpose that a decree of expulsion has been granted
by the authorities, and that you are on the point of
being ordered to leave this country, for political rea-
sons!"

I started to my feet, and with a gesture of terrible
anger I exclaimed :

" But what is their idea in doing this? Do they sup-
pose that persecution will induce me to yield to their
wishes?"

"I do not know," he muttered, wearily; "they seem
to love intrigue and persecution beyond all things, and
are trying to tire us out; to force us into our last in-
trenchments. Believe me, they will leave no stone un-
turned— I can see it now — before they have ruined you
forever."

"What is to be done, then? What do you wish me
to do?"

He looked at me with grave tenderness, then he said,
slowly: "It makes me very unhappy to think of the
fate which I have brought upon you. "

" Fate? There is no fate except that which we carve
for ourselves in this world," I answered, looking at
him with fearless eyes. " Don't be downhearted, Fred ;
this is no time for losing courage; we must act, and
act wisely."

" You are right, dearest. I will prove to you that
you have done well to trust me after all, and yet I cannot
bear to see you suffer all this for my sake. "

"I am not suffering. I do not complain. Have
enough faith in me, Fred, I beg of you, to believe that
no trial, no pain, will ever exhaust my stock of endur-
ance. My affection for you would be of little avail if it
did not inspire me at least with common courage."

"Courage like yours is a gift more rare than you
think, Muzzi;" and as he spoke he stooped towards

373

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

me, and, taking my hand, he pressed it tenderly in his
own.

"Look here, Fred," I continued, "you must worry
no longer about what is past and done. We should
now think only of the present and of the future. Every
moment is precious. We know where our enemies lie,
and how best we can baffle them, for they will not spare
us if we let them close around us. I will leave Paris at
once ; the important thing is to do so without attracting
attention, and there lies the difficulty. However, Heav-
en helps those who help themselves — is it not so?" I
added, with a smile, for I noticed how dejected he
looked, and resolved to rouse him at any cost from his
despondency and to dispel his gloomy thoughts.

When I found myself alone once more that night all
the extent of my troubles came back to me. I had prom-
ised Fred to think matters over and to tell him in the
morning what course I would adopt. Although I was
barely twenty-one, I had lived a life which had taught
me some harsh lessons, and given me much insight into
the failings of humanity in general. I well knew that
Fred's position was growing daily more difficult, more
painful, and I realized that the time might soon come
when his self-control would be tried beyond endurance.
He was a man of high principles, but he was also a man
of warmer feelings and tenderer heart than most, and I
was sincerely and deeply sorry for him. Far into the
night I sat in my dressing-room, reclining in the cosey
depths of a large arm-chair, thinking despondently of
the troubled seas I was navigating, and of Fred's sor-
row and precarious state of health. Great tears gath-
ered in my eyes, but I angrily brushed them off, for I
needed strength and could not afford to give way.

When the light of dawn began to glimmer through
the curtains of my room, I rose from my chair with a

374

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

sigh, and, walking towards the window, threw it open,
in order to cool my hot face in the fresh morning breeze.
My struggle was ended, my mind was made up, and I
felt as if that long night's vigil had worked a great
change in me.

When Fred appeared a few hours later I greeted him
with the following words, spoken cheerily:

" Fred, I have thought over what is best for us to do,
and I think that I have at last come to a wise decision/'

" Where do you propose to go?" he asked.

"To Italy, as I have intended all along, but I shall
start at once, to-day ; and I am, what is more, going to
marry you, my dear, without any further hesitation.
I have written to the Empress, advising her of my final
decision. Now let worse come to worst. As your wife,
at any rate, I will be an English subject, and will escape
the jurisdiction of all other governments. I should
have thought of this sooner. For your sake I tried to
save as much of the past as I could, and thought that a
little diplomacy would achieve this end ; but enough of
this nonsense. I am in the mood to fight, and fight I
will — taut pis pour les ecrases ! Patience is not my forte ;
so avanti, and may God be with us ! Let the responsi-
bility of the future rest on the heads of those who have
willed it so."

While I spoke he had raised his head, and was now
looking at me with an adoration passing all words.
Silently he threw his arms around me, and, drawing my
face close to his, for the first time he pressed his lips to
mine in a long kiss.

* * * * * * =:-

The sun was shining brightly on the summit of the
Sabine Mountains, and shedding its golden light over
the undulating plains of the Campagna. Far away, near
the horizon, there was a glancing line that showed where

375

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

the sea was beating on the sands near Ostia, while
the cross of St. Peter's, clearly denned in the distance
against the azure of the sky, rose proudly above im-
mortal Rome.

The spring had come, and both earth and sky were
wrapped in the glory of this season of youth and of love.

In the stately, melancholy rooms of a spacious villa
which stood on a rising slope outside the gates of Rome,
Fred and I were arranging pictures, tapestries, statues,
old bronzes, and old brocades, which lay in a picturesque
and artistic litter on the tessellated floor. Outside in the
shady gardens birds warbled their morning song among
the camellias, and gayly hued butterflies hovered over
the flower-filled lawns.

This was the place which we had rented soon after our
arrival in the City of the Popes, and we spent many
hours of each day under the palm and ilex trees in the
lonely, balmy gardens. The abode was well chosen,
and delighted me with its moss-grown terraces, where
ivy flourished, its walls of flowering rose-trees, and
its dusky, bronze-hued masses of cedar and magnolia.
Here at last I felt a perfect sense of repose, of peace,
and of security. I had left far behind me the buzz
and noise of the world, and I now enjoyed in all its
fulness a complete rest of body and soul which I had
never known till then.

Our work completed, we went out into the cool April
air and sat on the marble steps of the terrace. We were
happy in spite of the knowledge that everybody blamed
us, were ready to tear us to pieces and to crush us be-
neath their virtuous indignation. Little did we care
about society's censure, so long as we knew in our hearts
how undeserved that censure was. My second mar-
riage had created an enormous sensation. None knew
whither we had gone to spend our honeymoon, and

376

THE TRIBULATIONS OF A PRINCESS

the mystery which surrounded my disappearance from
social circles added, no doubt, great piquancy to the
numerous stories told about me under the shelter of
jewelled fans, in aristocratic salons, or in smoking-
rooms after the ladies had retired.

" I wonder sometimes/' Fred said to me, " that I could
have ever lived without you. My past existence seems
to me like an utter blank." Sitting at my feet on the
terrace, he kissed my hands with a lover's first ardor.

The only stranger who ever came to the villa was a
dear old priest who lived near by, a remarkable man,
much beloved by all who knew him. He became
greatly attached to us, and, although a simple-hearted
person, he proved a great acquisition to such exiles as
we were, in our new, strange home.

The poor people of the neighborhood asked no ques-
tions and showed no undue curiosity, and we really
enjoyed our isolation and solitude. All the stir and
blaze and noise in which we had dwelt for years were
gone as though they had never existed. A great and
solemn silence was always around us; we heard noth-
ing excepting the murmur of the breeze in the trees,
the distant shouts of the vine-growers, or the soft, sil-
very notes of the nightingales in the dusky park. Never
had we felt so perfectly free. We went out together in
all weathers — when gray floods of rain drifted noise-
lessly over the Campagna, and when the wind rose in
its wrath and raised columns of shimmering dust about
us. We often returned home drenched to the skin, but
it never seemed to hurt us. My sole anxiety was lest
Fred should tire of this quiet, uneventful life.

"Tell me, dear/' I said one day to him, "are you
certain that you regret nothing?"

He looked at me. We were walking in a long, shad-
owy allte. It was a beautiful day; the air was warm

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and fragrant, and it gave a color to his cheeks which
made him lock unusually well.

"Regret?" he exclaimed, impatiently. "Why will
you always say that? How can I regret anything
when I am near you? Do you not see that my love
for you is growing every day more intense and more
passionate?"

I slipped my hand through his arm and looked in his
eyes, my face uplifted to his.

No, he certainly did not look as if he regretted any-
thing. Men are strange animals, very whole-souled
sometimes, and very true.

And now I will stop for a while. I have tried my
reader's patience sorely, no doubt, by once more indulg-
ing in the luxury of setting down on paper a true state-
ment of facts, with all their lights and shadows, their
painful and their fewer happy sides. There is more to
tell, for these facts took place long ago, and I fear that
I am becoming a hardened offender, and thus I close
now ; but it is with a suspicion that I shall yield later
to the temptation of recounting, perchance in the same
familiar way, what further befell us.

FINIS

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